Inescapable

by Nancy Mehl

  My mother instantly collapsed into her chair. “Oh, Lizzie,” she said softly. “What have I done? What have I done?”

  I went over to the table, pulled up a chair, and put my arms around her. “It will be all right,” I said gently. “You did what had to be done. I’m proud of you, Mother.”

  “Proud of me?” she said, sobbing. “I have turned my husband out of my house. I am not sure God would approve of it. Not at all.”

  “Sister Anna,” Noah said, sitting down with us at the table, “you didn’t turn him out. He turned himself out. Remember that he ordered you out of your own home. You only did what had to be done. The church will back you fully. You have my word.”

  She shook her head. “I cannot go home now,” she said, her voice breaking. “Will you let me stay with you, Lizzie? At least tonight? I won’t be any trouble. I promise.”

  “Of course, Mother. You can stay here as long as you like. Charity and I would love to have you.”

  “Thank you, Daughter. Thank you so much.” She raised her wet face to mine. “Elizabeth Lynn, I want you to know how proud I am of you. So blessed that you are my daughter. And even though you may find this hard to believe, I have always been proud of you. That has never changed. I fear the reason you sought the love of a man when you were younger was because you could not find any compassion in your father. But you have proven to be a strong woman, raising a child alone and overcoming adversity with character and dignity. I want only to be more like you.”

  I hugged her tighter. “I’m not someone to emulate, Mother. I’ve been very foolish about a lot of things. I can see that now. I shouldn’t have run away from Kingdom in the first place. Not everyone was against me, as I thought. And I probably should have stood my ground in Kansas City. I ran away again, hoping my problems would go away instead of facing them.”

  “Does this mean you will go back there?” Mother asked, her voice slightly muffled by my shoulder.

  “I don’t know. I’m going to have to think things out, but if I do decide to return and face the music, I know I can leave my daughter here with you—and that she’ll be safe.”

  “Thank you, Lizzie. You cannot know how much that means to me.” She let go of me and wiped her face with a napkin on the table. “I will go check on Charity and send Callie downstairs. I believe you two need to prepare for your evening customers?”

  I looked at the clock on the wall and gasped. “Yes. Yes, I do. Thank you, Mother.”

  She rose from her chair and walked slowly toward the stairs. I knew the gravity of what had happened between her and my father weighed heavily on her shoulders. She’d been taught that a good Christian wife obeys her husband at all times. I was certain standing up to him had taken more out of her than I could even imagine.

  “She’ll be okay, Lizzie,” Noah said. “Your mother is much stronger than you realize. I can’t imagine how difficult it’s been, living with your father all these years. Yet she’s endured.”

  “Yes, she has. And now it seems as if their lives together are over.”

  He smiled at me. “I guess these situations are what faith is for. How about we pray for them and ask God to intervene?”

  “That sounds good, but if my father isn’t willing to change, how can God fix their marriage?”

  He reached over and took hold of my hand. “Well, He’s the only one who can get inside Matthew’s heart. You can’t do it, nor can your mother. Why don’t we pray that God will soften him? I have no doubt that God can do anything.”

  “You’re an odd man, Noah Housler,” I said. “You steal a kiss in the kitchen, and now you talk as if you and God are best friends.”

  He smiled and squeezed my hand. “He is my best friend, Lizzie. And He’s yours too.” Noah let go of my hand and stood up. “I need to get home. My mother will be frantic wondering where I am.” He pulled on his thick black coat and wide-brimmed hat. “I don’t mean to be nosy, but you mentioned trouble in Kansas City. I knew about the man who followed you here, since the church elders were informed of his presence, but I don’t know anything else about your situation. Is there something I can do to help you? Would you like to talk about it?”

  “Not right now, but thank you for caring.”

  “Well, I’m here if you need me. I’m a pretty good listener.”

  “I appreciate your offer, Noah. I’ll keep it in mind.”

  He glanced around the dining room. “Do you need some help in the restaurant? I can clean off tables with the best of them.”

  I chuckled and shook my head. “Elder Noah Housler busing tables? I’m afraid I’d never live it down. But thanks anyway.”

  “Okay.” Before walking out, he paused to stare at me. I felt as if his eyes were looking straight into my soul. “Just remember that if you need anything, Lizzie, all you have to do is ask. I promised once to take care of you, didn’t I? I meant it, you know.”

  With that he left. His parting comment should have made me feel safer, but for some reason it didn’t. I tried to shake off a sense of apprehension as I worked on the evening meals, but it dogged me the rest of the day. And before I fell asleep that night, Noah’s words kept echoing through my mind. It took a while before I was able to fall into an uneasy sleep.

  CHAPTER / 20

  Tuesday started off slowly, and I welcomed the chance to decelerate a bit. Mother had stayed the night, sleeping in my bed while I took the couch. It felt odd to have her there, but I liked it.

  She suggested that Charity and I could move into her house once Father had cleared out, but I put her off. Noah was right. As impossible as it sounded, I had to pray that God would touch Father’s heart and bring him home. I would also pray that the man who returned would be the husband my mother had once loved. A man I couldn’t remember at all. And even though I appreciated her offer, I’d grown to love our apartment and didn’t want to leave. Of course, Charity would be horrified if we moved into the house with the “bad potty,” so for now, we would stay put.

  Things picked up around lunch. A little after two o’clock, Hope came in, and she brought Leah Burkholder with her. It was wonderful to see her after all these years. I would have known her in an instant. She had been a plain little girl and had grown into a plain young woman. But the intelligence in her eyes and the way she spoke made her the kind of person people felt drawn to. I had no doubt she was a wonderful teacher, and could see immediately why the children loved her. I told her I planned to enroll Charity after the Christmas break if we were still in town. Leah had a cup of coffee and then left, needing to get back to the school.

  “She’s so much more confident than she was as a child,” I told Hope when Leah had gone.

  Hope nodded. “Leah came into her own when she began teaching. I believe it is because she discovered the gifts God placed inside her. When we find our destiny, it gives us confidence. . . . But not in ourselves—it is in God, who puts us where we are supposed to be and gives us what we need to succeed.” She sighed. “I must admit that I’m still looking for my special place, but I have put my desire in the Father’s hands. I’m waiting for His leading.”

  I could relate to that. Once again I remembered the voice that had told me to come to Kingdom. I was convinced that Clay hadn’t shown up here by accident. Surely it was part of God’s greater plan to bring us back together. Only time would tell if I was right.

  “Besides bringing Leah to talk to you about the school, I wanted to tell you that the elders went to your father last night in an attempt to heal the wounds caused by our recent vote. When they got to the house, your father refused to talk to them. He told them he was leaving in the morning and asked them to let your mother know he’d purchased a horse and buggy from Avery Menninger. He’s leaving Blackie and their buggy behind so she won’t be without transportation.”

  “Wow. It’s hard to believe he thought enough about Mother to do that,” I said. “But it will certainly make life easier for her.”

  “I’m sorry he’s leaving, Lizz
ie. I pray he’ll be all right. He seems to be a man who needs a wife to care for him.”

  I could have told her it was my mother who’d asked him to go, but I decided that wouldn’t be wise. There might be people in the church who would give her a hard time about it, and she didn’t need that kind of pressure. “He did have a wife who cared for him, Hope. Problem was, he couldn’t do the same for her.”

  She was silent for a moment before asking, “Do you know where he’ll go?”

  “I have no idea. He said something about moving farther out into the country, where he wouldn’t have to be around people. That should suit him just fine. He has a hard time getting along with other human beings, you know.”

  “What a lonely life. I feel so sorry for him.” The sincerity in her eyes made me feel a little ashamed. She seemed to have more sympathy for my father than I did.

  “He brought all this on himself, don’t you think?” I asked a little defensively. “I mean, my mother did everything she could to make him happy, but he refused to show her even the slightest kindness.”

  She looked surprised. “I’m sure you know more about your parents than I do. But I used to watch him help her out of their carriage before and after church services. He seemed so . . . solicitous. Every time there was a church dinner, he would insist on getting her plate so she wouldn’t have to wait in line. And when it rained, he would bring the buggy as close to the building as possible to save her from getting wet.”

  “Of course he did all those things in front of church people, Hope. After all, he valued his position as an elder. But at home he ruled like a tyrant, and if I repeated the things he’s said to me and my mother . . . Well, you wouldn’t believe them.”

  She reached over and rested her hand on my arm. “I’m really sorry, Lizzie. I know it wasn’t easy. But people are rarely one-sided. Your father must have good traits. Every child of God has a part of His Spirit inside him, pulling him toward goodness. Anyway, that’s what I’ve observed.” She laughed lightly and removed her hand. “Of course, here I am in Kingdom, seeing little of the outside world. Forgive me for speaking foolishly, will you?”

  “I’m sure there’s truth in what you say, it’s just that . . . I don’t know. I guess it’s hard for me to see any good traits in my father.” I sighed. “My mother says his life was very hard growing up. My grandfather may have been even harsher than Father.”

  She nodded. “I imagine it has made relationships difficult for him.”

  I felt myself flush with irritation. “Well, he made my life hard, but you don’t see me mistreating my family and trying to toss Pastor Mendenhall out of the church.”

  Hope’s light complexion paled. “I’ve upset you. Again, I apologize. Perhaps I should go.”

  “Please, Hope, don’t leave. I’m the one who should be apologizing. My emotions are very raw when it comes to Father. I’m trying hard to forgive him, and it’s taking a toll on me. I don’t mean to take it out on you. Your friendship is extremely valuable to me, and I have no intention of letting anything come between us. Especially my father. I’ll think about what you said. I really will. It means more than I can say to have a friend who will speak candidly with me. Thank you.” I smiled at her. “Now, I insist you try a piece of the banana bread I made this morning. It’s so good it will put color in your cheeks.”

  She laughed. “I’m told I could use some roses in my cheeks, so I will gladly try a slice. Perhaps with a cup of your wonderful coffee?”

  “You got it.”

  Before I could get up, a young man came in through the front door. He was tall and dark haired, with bright blue eyes and a walk that commanded attention. He strode over to our table and stuck his hand out.

  “Hello, I’m Jonathon Wiese,” he said without taking his eyes off Hope. “My family moved to Kingdom a couple of years ago. I heard Matthew and Anna’s daughter was back in town.” He finally shifted his gaze to me. “I wanted to meet you and tell you how pleased I am that you’re back.”

  “Well, thank you, Jonathon. I had no idea there were new families in town.”

  His smile revealed perfectly even teeth that were so white they gleamed. “Believe it or not, there are several of us. I hope our influence will be felt in the church. I’m glad to see we’re moving toward change, although I regret your father felt the need to leave. I’m sure he’s convinced he’s doing the right thing, but we have no choice except to move forward. We must alter the things that separate us from the grace of God. Don’t you agree?”

  Hope smiled at me. “Jonathon is a revisionist, Lizzie. He believes our church must adjust its stodgy ways if we are to keep our relevance. I must say that I agree with most of what he says.”

  Jonathon flashed his flawless teeth at Hope. “So there are some points you don’t agree with, Sister Hope? Perhaps we could spend some time discussing them. I value your opinion.”

  It would have been obvious to a blind man that Jonathon was interested in much more than just Hope’s view of church doctrine. Feeling like a third wheel, I excused myself. The two of them barely noticed I’d left. I had to wonder if their relationship was a threat to Hope’s arranged marriage with Ebbie. Jonathon seemed so self-assured and dynamic, whereas Ebbie was quiet and shy. But since it wasn’t any of my business, I cut some banana bread for Hope, asked Callie to make sure she had coffee, and got back to work.

  Mother watched Charity all afternoon. I told her more than once that she could leave whenever she wanted to, but I sensed she was afraid to run into Father, even though I shared with her what Hope had said.

  I was in the kitchen preparing the evening special, chicken and noodles, when Callie came rushing into the kitchen.

  “Lizzie, it’s the sheriff. He wants to see you.”

  Mother cried out, and my heart felt as if it would burst. Was this it? Had he come for me? In that moment, I realized I may have been terribly foolish to remain in Kingdom. With Clay’s money, Charity and I could have already been far away. But the voice that drew me to Kingdom had promised me everything would be okay. If that voice truly belonged to God, I could be secure in His promise. I squared my shoulders and followed Callie into the dining room, trying to look confident even though I didn’t feel that way. Sheriff Ford sat at a table in the corner. Except for a man I didn’t know who was drinking coffee and reading a book, the room was empty.

  “You wanted to see me, Sheriff?” I asked, trying to keep the apprehension out of my voice.

  “Yes, Miss Engel. The autopsy came back on that dead man in the ditch.”

  “I don’t understand, Sheriff. Why tell me about it?”

  He shrugged. “I heard the owner of this place was outta town, and you were in charge. Seemed like the best way to spread the word would be through a public joint like this. I mean, most of the town’s people come through here, don’t they?” He scowled at me. “Any reason not to tell you?”

  “No. Sorry, Sheriff. That makes perfect sense.” I heard my mother come out of the kitchen and stand behind me. I felt her hand on my shoulder. “Please, go on.”

  He leaned against the nearest table and crossed his arms. “Well, the doc in Washington ruled the death an accident, mostly because he couldn’t prove it was anything else. Seems the wound to the dead guy’s head coulda been caused by fallin’ down that ravine and landin’ on the rocks. So we’re through with our inquiry into this matter.” He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a small notebook.

  “Do . . . do you have any idea what he was doing out here?” I tried to keep my voice steady, but my nervousness was obvious.

  The sheriff frowned at me. “Could be anything. Maybe he came here to hunt. We get all kinds of yahoos out here this time of year.” He scribbled something in his notebook. “I don’t got time to figure out why this guy was in the area. We’re callin’ it an accident, so my part in this is done. That’s all I care about.”

  “Did you at least find out who he was?”

  The sheriff nodded and scanned his
notes. “His name was Dave Parsons. Retired from the water company. A real loner who fancied himself a part-time private eye.” Ford snorted. “Lotsa nuts out there think they know how to do the job of a professional. ’Course all they usually end up investigatin’ is cheatin’ spouses and crud like that. Could be that’s why he was out this way, but we’ll never know, I guess.

  “Police went through his apartment, but there wasn’t nothin’ there. No notes, no computer, nothin’ helpful. No way for anyone to know why he was so far from home.” He closed the notebook and stuck it back in his pocket. “Only livin’ relative is a sister in Florida who hasn’t seen him in years. We’re releasin’ the body to her. She wasn’t too happy about bein’ responsible for him, but that’s her problem.”

  He pushed away from the table and stood with his hands on his hips. “You folks got any questions?”

  I shook my head. “Thank you for coming by, Sheriff. And we’ll make sure everyone knows that Mr. Parsons’ death was an accident. I’m sure it will help folks to feel safer.”

  “That’s my intention. Mind you, I still think you’re all a little wacky out here, but you deserve to know there ain’t no crazed killer runnin’ around knockin’ people off.”

  I almost burst out laughing at his comment. The sheriff had to get in one last word about the town even when he was trying to apologize. What a character. “Thanks, again. And have a good day.”

  “You too.” With that he was gone. Did the doctor’s ruling mean my worries about the man in the red cap were over? I wanted to feel relief that his death had been deemed accidental, but it was clear that the sheriff’s main interest was getting the case off his hands. What about the truth? There was no way I could believe with certainty that Dave Parsons wasn’t killed by someone else. And if his death wasn’t an accident, what did that mean? Discovering that Parsons was a part-time detective confirmed my suspicion that he’d been following me. That seemed to point directly to Reba. Unfortunately, I still couldn’t be sure, and I couldn’t assume that I was actually in the clear. At least knowing the police hadn’t found anything to connect Parsons to me made me feel a little more secure. For now, anyway.