by HELEN HARDT
“Just came in for a drink.”
“There are plenty of other places in the city where you could get that first-class gin you’re looking for.”
I looked down at the martini glass in front of me. I downed the rest of it and stood, pulling my wallet out of my pocket and throwing a twenty on the counter.
I looked over at Mike again and threw another twenty down. “Buy Mike here a couple more drinks if he wants them,” I said to Lucky.
“Didn’t mean to chase you out of here,” Mike said.
“You didn’t. I just have no business being here. See, I didn’t come down here to stop in the bar.”
“Yeah, I was pretty sure you hadn’t. Why did you come here?”
I wasn’t going to tell Mike about my penchant for getting my ass whooped. And hey, didn’t the fact that I stopped this time count for something? An empty alley wouldn’t have stopped me before. I’d have just kept walking until I found someone to pick a fight with.
I needed to see Melanie. I wanted to discuss this with her. Maybe she couldn’t be my therapist anymore, but I felt an overwhelming urge to open up to her. I didn’t relish telling her that I got my ass beaten on purpose, but she was a trained professional. She would understand. Even when I didn’t quite understand myself.
But even then, no matter how much I yearned to open up, I knew I wouldn’t tell her. At least not yet.
“I don’t know, Mike. I really don’t know.”
“Sit back down for a while. Maybe I can help.”
“No one can help me. I’ve tried.” I gave him a pat on the back and walked out.
Chapter Twelve
Melanie
My phone buzzed once again while I was waiting to be taken in to see Erica Cates, Gina’s mother. It was Jonah again. He’d called several times during my walk to Valleycrest Hospital, but I hadn’t picked up. I sighed. Sooner or later I’d have to deal with Jonah Steel, but right now, all I could think about was Gina’s mother, here in the mental wing of Valleycrest. I wasn’t sure coming to see her was a good idea, but I had to know that she was okay. That she would live.
I had privileges at Valleycrest, so I figured it wouldn’t be any problem to get in to see Mrs. Cates. Because of the nature of the situation, though, I had to jump through a few hoops. Dr. Cates had said his wife had been repeating my name, or what he thought was my name. Did that mean she wanted to see me, or did it mean something else?
One of my favorite nurses, Beth, walked toward me. “Dr. Carmichael, she does agree to see you, but I need to stay with you while you visit with her.”
“That’s fine, Beth. I understand. I really just want to make sure she’s all right.”
My words sounded foolish. Of course she wasn’t all right. She’d tried to end her life, and she had lost her only daughter less than a year before. How the hell was she supposed to be all right?
“Her life hasn’t been in danger,” Beth said.
“I’m thankful for that. Who is the doctor working with her?”
“Dr. Bennett.”
Miles Bennett was a decent physician, but his bedside manner wasn’t the best. I’d always wondered why he chose psychiatry as a specialty. In psychiatry, a doctor who didn’t have a good bedside manner usually didn’t get very far. Miles worked exclusively with hospitalized psychiatric patients instead of taking patients for psychotherapy as I did. Rarely had I had to hospitalize any of my patients, though there had been a few over the years. I was familiar with the mental health staff here at Valleycrest.
“When was the last time Dr. Bennett was in to see Mrs. Cates?” I asked.
“This morning, during rounds.”
Beth led me into a private room. A dark-haired woman, brown eyes sad and sunken, lay on the bed, her head propped up with several pillows.
“Mrs. Cates?” Beth said. “This is Dr. Carmichael.”
“Hello, Mrs. Cates,” I said.
The woman did not turn toward me. “Hello,” she replied.
“Thank you for allowing me to see you.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
I sat down in the chair next to her bed. “I understand you’re seeing Dr. Bennett. He’s excellent.”
This time she turned toward me. “What would you know about excellent? You couldn’t save my daughter.”
A dagger sliced into my gut. I opened my mouth, but no words came out.
“Dr. Bennett is a very good doctor,” Beth said, “and so is Dr. Carmichael.”
I appreciated Beth’s confidence in me, but I wasn’t sure now was the right time for her to voice it.
“Mrs. Cates, I’m so very sorry about what happened to Gina.”
“Not sorry enough.”
What could I say to that? She had experienced an unbearable loss, and in her mind, I was to blame. She could never know how sorry I was. She had refused to take my call after Gina’s death, and after that, I’d sought advice from an attorney. He advised me not to communicate with Gina’s parents. If I hadn’t called the other night, would Mrs. Cates be lying here now? Had my calling brought her pain back somehow? God, that call had been a mistake. It had been pure self-indulgence, only to ease my own guilt. I’d berated myself over and over again since then. I knew better, and I hadn’t given a thought to how it might affect Gina’s parents. Ironically, it hadn’t done a thing for my guilt anyway.
Tears emerged in the corner of my eyes. Hold it together, Melanie. You can’t cry in front of this woman. I inhaled and stood. “I’ll leave you to get your rest now, Mrs. Cates. Thank you for seeing me. I’m so glad you’re okay.”
I turned and walked out. Beth’s soft padded footsteps followed me.
“Dr. Carmichael,” Beth said, “I want you to know that none of us here on staff think any of this is your fault.”
I wiped my eyes. “I know that. Thank you.”
“Dr. Bennett doesn’t think it’s your fault either.”
“I appreciate that, Beth. I really do. However, I feel like complete shit.”
She nodded. “It’s never easy to lose a patient. I’ve lost my share of them.”
I was sure she had, but it was different for a nurse. Granted, nurses cared for patients on a daily basis and sometimes got to know them as well or better than their physicians did. But it wasn’t the nurse who was charged with primary care. It wasn’t the same thing at all.
“I know.” I didn’t know what else to say. I couldn’t tell her that I thought it was different for her, even though I knew nurses felt the loss of a patient deeply. Maybe it wasn’t so different. “Thanks for getting me in to see her. Please take good care of her.”
Beth smiled. “You know I will, and so will Dr. Bennett.”
I nodded, unable to speak past the lump in my throat. I gave her a small smile and walked toward the elevator.
The elevator doors opened, and I gasped. Standing in front of me was none other than Jonah Steel.
I froze in my tracks. What to do now? What else could I do? I got on the elevator.
“Hello, Jonah,” I said rather formally.
“Hello, Melanie,” he said in a similar tone.
“Aren’t you getting off the elevator?”
“Why would I?”
“I just assumed maybe you were visiting someone on the floor?”
“Nope.”
“Then you’re coming from another floor?”
“No.”
“Then what are you doing on this elevator?”
He smiled, and my heart nearly leaped out of my chest.
“I’m looking for you.”
“How did you know I was here?”
“I called your office. Randi said you were over at Valleycrest doing rounds. So here I am.”
I’d have to have a little chat with Randi. Normally I never made it a secret that I was doing rounds, and I had told her that was where I’d be this afternoon, so really she hadn’t done anything wrong. “Well, you’re here, and I’m here now. What can I do for you?”
�
��I thought we could talk.”
“About what?”
“You know, kind of help each other. Since you can’t be my therapist. As friends. Like we tried to do the other day.”
Was he serious? The other day had effectively ended any friendship between us before it could have ever begun. “Given our…history, I’m not sure that would be appropriate.”
“What history?”
Uh…the fact that you screwed my brains out? I warmed from my forehead to my toes. “You know…”
“Of course. Our afternoon together. That afternoon when I fell asleep and you disappeared. Interesting that you would bring that up.”
I was getting a little miffed. Emotion from seeing Gina’s mother whirled through me, and I wasn’t in any shape to deal with Jonah’s and my mutual attraction. “What the hell is interesting about it? I’m…”
“You’re what?”
I looked away. “Embarrassed.”
He grabbed my arm and forced me against the elevator wall. “Embarrassed?” he said through clenched teeth. “You’re embarrassed that we had amazing, mind-blowing sex for an hour?”
I cleared my throat. “I don’t regret it or anything.”
“You don’t regret it?” Fire laced his dark eyes.
I shook my head, biting my lip hard. He let go of me and quickly pushed the emergency stop button on the elevator.
I gasped. “What are you doing?”
“This.” He smashed his lips to mine.
I opened for him without thinking, as if it were a reflex. And perhaps it was. Perhaps I would always open for him. For Jonah Steel—a man so strong, yet holding on to so much guilt. I understood him better than he knew. My God, the man could kiss. I had never been kissed like this, never been kissed the way he kissed me. He had elevated it to an art.
Again, my emotions overwhelmed me. I’d just seen my dead patient’s mother… Gina… Gone… And Jonah… Here…
And very much alive.
My nipples tightened, and my pussy began to pulsate.
I ground into his mouth, swirling my tongue with his and loving every minute of it.
When he finally paused to take a breath, I inhaled deeply.
“Jonah, no. I work here. Everyone knows me at the hospital.”
He smiled. “Fine. I’ll let you go. If we continue this. At your place.”
I gulped and nodded. I’d have been happy to continue here, if it were any other building. Finally, he let go of me and pushed the button on the elevator so we resumed our downward ride.
What must I look like? I walked out of the elevator, nodding to a few people. And then there was the monstrously handsome man with his arm on my back. What would everyone think?
“Where’s your place?” he asked.
“A couple blocks from here, a downtown loft.”
“You have a car?”
I shook my head. “I walked.”
“We’ll take mine.”
Jonah kissed me breathless in the car at my building. He kissed me breathless in the elevator rising to the fourth floor where my loft was located. He kissed me breathless against my door, stopping only for me to unlock it.
He grabbed me and pushed me against the wall after kicking the door shut, kissing me breathless one more time.
He broke the kiss and inhaled. “Bedroom?”
I pointed toward the open door on the other side of the living area.
He lifted me in his arms as if I weighed no more than a child and swiftly carried me across the living area into the bedroom. I hadn’t made my bed that morning, but he didn’t seem to notice.
He dropped me on the bed and then sat down, his lips next to my ear. “I need to be inside you. I can’t wait. But I promise you I will not leave you hanging. After we rest, I want to take it slow. I want to taste every inch of you, Melanie. I want to sample those sweet nipples. I want to make you scream as I eat your pussy. I want to lick your ass. I won’t stop until I’ve tasted every fucking millimeter of your gorgeous body.”
My breath caught.
“Get undressed,” he growled.
It never occurred to me not to obey him. I shed my clothes as he shed his, baring his beautiful body to me.
He grabbed his wallet out of his jeans pocket, quickly opened and put on a condom, and then forced me back down on the bed. Instantly, he was inside me.
He groaned—a groan I had heard before. From my patients who were drug addicts. They groaned like that when they got their fix. Could I be Jonah’s fix? The thought made me melt. I wanted to be his fix.
He held himself inside me for a moment, letting me get used to his size.
Little did he know, I was already used to him. Again, as had happened the first time, when he entered me, I felt like I had come home.
“God,” he said. “You feel so good around me.”
He pulled out and thrust back in. I gasped against his shoulder.
“You all right?”
I sighed. “Yes. All right.” I bit my lip.
“Thank God.” He thrust back in.
I let out a soft moan every time he slid back into me, and before I knew it, a climax was primed and ready to go. Just as I was about to start coming, he pulled out.
“You are beautiful right now. Glowing. Just gorgeous.” He stuck his dick back into my heat.
I grasped the comforter, balling my hands into fists around the fabric.
He fucked me hard and fast. The orgasm on the edge teetered over into full force.
I cried out. With passion and power, he fucked me, groaning my name.
“God, sweetheart, I’m going to come.” One last thrust, and he groaned, allowing his weight upon me.
I flattened on the bed, his weight too much for me to bear, but I didn’t care. I wanted him on top of me, close to me. I welcomed it.
Within a few seconds, he had rolled over onto his side. “Sorry about that. I know how heavy I am.”
I turned to face him. “No reason to be sorry. I wasn’t complaining.”
“Let me rest for a minute, and then I’m going to take my time. I’m going to savor every inch of skin and every drop of juice you have to offer.”
I swallowed audibly. I couldn’t think of anything to say. I didn’t have to, because he gently brushed his lips over mine.
“I hope I make you feel half as incredible as you make me feel,” he said. “My God, you’re amazing.” He rolled onto his back and closed his eyes.
Soon his shallow breathing indicated he had fallen asleep. I looked at the clock. It was nearly six. I got up, went to the bathroom, put on a robe, and headed out to the kitchen. He’d be hungry when he woke up, probably for food. I smiled at my own joke. I looked through the cupboards and the refrigerator. Not a lot to work with, so I made a quick call to my favorite Thai place and pulled a bottle of lusty red Zinfandel off my wine rack. When he woke up, dinner would be waiting.
Chapter Thirteen
Jonah
I opened my eyes and took in my surroundings. Melanie’s bedroom was decorated in burgundy and ivory, with dark wood accents—just feminine enough without being too froufrou for a man’s taste. Her bathroom was off to the left, so I went in to take care of business. I looked in the mirror and couldn’t help a chuckle. I looked well and thoroughly fucked. And damn, I felt good.
Back in the bedroom, the zesty aroma of chicken and peppers wafted toward me. I pulled on my jeans and walked out, my feet and chest bare.
Melanie was standing in the kitchen wearing a short, silky green robe. God, she had great legs—long, lean, and shapely.
I gave her a whistle.
She turned. “Are you hungry?”
“I am now. Something smells great.”
“Thai basil chicken,” she said. “But don’t get too used to it. It’s takeout.”
Don’t get too used to it. Did that mean I wouldn’t be here for meals? Or did it mean it was takeout, so don’t get used to it, because normally she would be cooking? Hell, it could mean eit
her. Right now, all I cared about was doing a little carbo-loading so I could get her back in the sack.
“Whatever it is, it smells great.” I inhaled.
Her small table was set for two, and takeout containers sat on what appeared to be fine linen. She had class, this one. She’d poured two glasses of wine and set two goblets of water by two plain white china plates. Elegant and feminine without being overstated. I liked this woman.
A lot.
“Go ahead and sit down. Help yourself.”
“I’ll wait for you,” I said.
“I’m right behind you.” She turned off the faucet, drying her hands quickly on a kitchen towel, walked a few strides, and sat down across from me at the table.
“I have no idea what you like. I hope Thai is okay.”
“I like anything. We’re big eaters in my family.”
“I’m sure you probably prefer beef, since you’re a beef rancher.”
“I eat beef all the time, Melanie. Chicken is great. I love Thai.”
“Well”—she cleared her throat—“don’t be shy. Please, help yourself.”
“Ladies first. Give me your plate.”
She looked at me oddly as she handed it to me. Was she not used to chivalry? There was a lot I didn’t know about Melanie Carmichael. I aimed to find it all out.
I gave her a healthy portion of chicken, brown rice, and a spring roll and handed the plate back to her.
“Thank you,” she said, flushing.
Oh, how I loved to make this one blush. Those raspberry cheeks bloomed as fresh as a pink rose.
I quickly served myself and then picked up my glass of wine. “To us.”
She blushed again, more red than pink this time. “Us?”
“Sure, why not? I’m here, you’re here, we just had some amazing sex, and now we’re sitting down to a nice dinner. To us.”
She timidly raised her glass and murmured, “To us,” not quite looking me in the eye.
I took a sip of the wine. “Zinfandel?” I asked.
