Mean Machine

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Mean Machine Page 6

by Joanna Blake


  I cringed, remembering the hurt look in her lovely eyes. I said a silent prayer that she wouldn’t up and quit on me too. I deserved no less for grabbing her like that. What I’d done after was far worse. I’d been so cowardly about my feelings for her that I’d turned her away.

  For some godforsaken reason, the woman had wanted me too. That delicate, flawless creature had wanted me. It didn’t make a lick of sense, and I hadn’t been prepared for a miracle at the moment.

  Instead of pulling her close and tell her how I felt, I’d destroyed any chance of happiness.

  So yeah, I pretty much hated myself right now.

  That’s when I saw it.

  Michelle. What is she doing here?

  Her beat up old car was parked on the other side of the road. My stomach flipped over and clenched. I sprang into panic mode, swerving over to park on the grassy shoulder opposite her car. We were in the middle of nowhere out here. Someone must have forced her off the road.

  They’d hurt her.

  They’d hurt Paton.

  I threw the truck door open and ran into the street. It was very quiet, so I knew I probably wouldn’t get run over. The truth was, I didn’t even look. I stared into the car, my heart racing.

  They were dead. I saw Paton lying still. Michelle’s head was drooping to one side where she lay in the driver’s seat. Someone had killed them.

  Maybe even because of me.

  I felt a sob erupt from my throat. I had to call it in. I had to call Connor-

  Michelle moved. I stared in awe as her dainty hand reached up and brushed the hair off her cheek.

  Not dead.

  Paton rolled to her side, her cute little face scrunched up.

  Not dead.

  Sleeping. Sleeping in the car. All these nights… all this time they’d been…

  Homeless.

  They were homeless.

  I looked closer at the car. It was packed, though not dirty. Duffle bags. Books. My heart twisted when I saw one of the coloring books I’d gotten Paton tucked into the blankets with her.

  Had I even bothered to check her address when I hired her? Had I bothered to ask where they stayed? I’d imagined it often enough, picturing her sleeping in a soft bed, wearing next to nothing. Maybe something lacy that barely covered any of her beauty.

  I’d been too busy thinking with my dick to realize they were in trouble.

  So, there it was. Now I hated myself even more. I was a bastard. And God knows what could have happened to them while I was worried about my fucking feelings.

  This. Ends. Now.

  I rapped on the glass gently. Michelle’s eyes opened. She looked terrified. Then she saw me.

  Shame. Worry. Pain.

  That’s what I saw on her beautiful face. My self-loathing kicked up another notch. She held a finger to her lips and I nodded.

  She got out of the car and walked ten feet away. Her arms were wrapped around her stomach protectively.

  I followed, doing my best to keep my fury in check. I couldn’t speak. I was too damn angry.

  Angry at her for not asking for help.

  But mostly angry at myself for being so fucking stupid.

  She wouldn’t even look at me.

  “The motel was full.”

  My jaw clenched but I didn’t say anything.

  “We’re getting a place. They just wanted at least a month of pay stubs.”

  She glanced up at me fearfully and I forced myself to nod.

  “We didn’t have anyplace else to go.”

  I exhaled sharply. She had me. She had a place to go.

  But maybe she didn’t know that. How could she after the way I’d tried to hold her at arm’s length?

  “Come on.”

  “Where?”

  “I’m taking you guys home. We can talk there.”

  She chewed her lip and my lust reared it’s ugly head. I felt like a pig. I was responsible for them. I had been all along. If I hadn’t been such a lecherous bastard, I would have realized what was going on.

  “We can talk now.”

  “No.”

  I need time to calm down. She already looked shaken up. I didn’t want to yell at her.

  “Give me your phone.”

  She pulled it from her pocket. It was old. Beat up, like her car and her coat and her shoes. I was a damn fool.

  I texted myself and handed her phone back.

  “Follow me.”

  She stared at me, her eyes wide.

  “Mason…”

  “Follow me, Michelle.”

  I waited for her nod. Then I turned and walked away. I stopped, and looked back at her.

  “Do not even think about running off on me.”

  She opened her mouth but nothing came out.

  “I will find you if you do.”

  “I won’t.”

  I nodded and climbed back into my truck and turned around so I was in front of them, heading towards home. I waited as she woke Paton and strapped her into the front seat.

  I drove home slowly, though my foot felt like it was made of lead. I wanted to race home and deal with this. I wanted this situation solved.

  I wanted to know that they were safe under my roof and would stay that way.

  Forever.

  But I was so angry. The anger mixed with my twisted lust, and sorrow. I put my hand on Besos again and felt my pulse begin to slow. I would remain calm. I would take care of this. It was going to be okay.

  No one would ever make them sleep in a car again.

  I was grim faced when I parked in front of my house on the curb. I stepped out and waved them into the driveway. Then I boxed them in. I was taking no chances.

  Michelle’s lovely face was pale when she got out of the car. She looked worried. Embarrassed.

  Well, I was going to put a stop to that as well.

  I forced a smile for Paton as I grabbed their bags from the backseat.

  “What are you do-doing?”

  Michelle was so nervous she nearly stuttered. The soft sound of her voice tore through me like a knife. This precious woman had needed me and I’d nearly failed her. Never again.

  “How about pancakes?”

  Paton nodded happily, clutching her coloring book in her hand.

  “Can I bring this too?”

  “Of course.”

  I opened the side door and held it open. Michelle gave me a quick searching look before stepping inside. Paton had no such reservations. She squealed when she saw Besos run in behind me. The dog promptly covered her face with sloppy kisses.

  “It’s alright, he’s not a biter.”

  Michelle let out a little sigh of relief. I had known, even without seeing her face, exactly what she’d been thinking.

  “The cats don’t bite either, unless you rub their bellies wrong.”

  Paton’s sweet little face scrunched up from where she was kneeling on the floor with Besos.

  “You can rub a cat wrong?”

  “Oh, definitely. Didn’t you know? Cats are very particular about how they like their bellies touched. You have to be a little more gentle with them.”

  “Okay.”

  “Oh, and don’t touch their feet. Or tails. They are very proud of their tails.”

  “Really?”

  I nodded solemnly.

  “Why don’t you catch a shower and I’ll get some grub on. Bathroom’s right down the hall. Towels in the cabinet.”

  She nodded happily.

  “Make yourself at home.” I called after her as she scampered down the hallway with her duffle bag. I gave Michelle a hard look. “You too.”

  She was just standing there by the door. She looked ready to bolt. I exhaled and ran my hand through my hair.

  “How long?”

  I saw her throat convulse.

  “What?”

  “How long have you been living like that?”

  She just stared at the floor.

  I sighed and washed my hands and got out the ingredients fo
r breakfast.

  “A couple of months.”

  “How did this happen?”

  She shifted on her feet.

  “Sit down, for God’s sake!”

  She sat, looking like a frightened child.

  “Please…”

  I turned to look at her.

  “What did you say?”

  “Please don’t call CPS.”

  I felt a lead bowling ball settle in my stomach.

  “Michelle…”

  “Please, Mason.”

  She looked at me and I nearly melted into a puddle on the floor. Her beautiful eyes were begging me. She thought I was going to hurt her. To tear the two of them apart.

  “I won’t do that.”

  Her shoulders sagged and I turned away. If I didn’t, I was going to end up pulling her into my arms again. That hadn’t gone so well last time.

  I didn’t want her to think that staying here meant I was going to expect special privileges.

  Though, damn, I should not have even thought about that. I was making pancakes for a scared girl and her child dammit. I did not need to be sporting a fucking boner. But I was. At least I was facing the stove.

  “I was sixteen.”

  My hand stilled, covered in flour. I just waited.

  “I tried to hide it but they knew. They knew.”

  I turned my head slightly so I could see her. I was afraid to make any sudden movements. Afraid she would bolt. Or clam up again.

  “They threw me out into the street with nothing.” She lifted her chin. “I was lucky though. I had already waited tables so I knew how. And I found a job pretty fast.”

  “What about the boy?”

  “He was… I thought he loved me. But I think he was working his way down a list. He was the captain of the football team and… well, he didn’t want anything to do with me after those first few times.”

  I wanted to kill him, whoever he was. Not just because he’d abandoned her. But because he’d dared to touch her to begin with.

  She was mine, dammit.

  I shook my head at the thought.

  Whoa Mason, chill the fuck out.

  “What happened next?”

  “I should check on Pate.”

  “She’s fine. Talk now. Check later.”

  “She’ll use all your hot water.”

  “I don’t mind.” I threw her a grin. “I already showered. You’re the one who will end up cold.”

  Why had I said that? Now I was imagining her in the shower, dancing from foot to foot as cold water sliced over her luminous skin.

  Get a grip, Mason. Get a grip.

  “It’s nice of you to do this but you don’t-”

  I cut her off right fucking there. I turned around, hoping my fucking dick was not terribly noticeable.

  “Yes, I fucking do.”

  She stared at me in shock.

  “I don’t understand. Is it because of… the kiss?”

  “No.”

  “You don’t owe me anything. I shouldn’t have thrown myself at you that way…”

  I was across the room before I knew it. My hands were behind her, braced on the back of her chair.

  “You. Did. Not. Throw yourself. At me.”

  I stared into her eyes, forcing myself to step away after a long, uncomfortably hot minute.

  “That was all me. I’m the one who is sorry. You are my employee. I would never force myself on you like that.”

  Her mouth opened but I shook my head. I didn’t want to hear it. I heard the water turn off and got back to the pancakes.

  “You will tell me what happened.”

  She nodded.

  “And you will be staying here. You two can take Casey’s old room.”

  She nodded.

  “I think she’s out if you want to go check on her.”

  While she was in the hallway, I went outside and put a boot on her car. I wasn’t going to take any chances. Not with this.

  Not with them.

  After all this, and the situation brewing with the Untouchables and Raisers, I was not letting her out of my sight for a minute.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Michelle

  His house was nice. Not that I hadn’t expected that. But it was still a little bit surprising how nice it was.

  How cozy.

  The Mason Jar was a cool place. Atmospheric. Cleaner than it looked, but still gritty looking with all the dark wood. Extremely masculine.

  But Mason’s house was actually… homey.

  And he wanted us to move in.

  I crept back into the kitchen and slid into a chair.

  I could barely even look at him after the past twelve hours. First the kiss and then him finding us sleeping in the car. I felt like such a fool.

  He’d spun me around, making me emotionally dizzy. I didn’t know how to handle the feelings I was having. The ache.

  I hadn’t really dated much since Paton’s dad. Or before.

  The truth was, I hadn’t dated at all.

  I’d been pawed a few times. A few guys had tried to kiss me, usually after cornering me in a dark spot. I’d gotten away every time.

  I knew that as a woman alone, I was lucky that was the worst I had dealt with. But I was woefully inexperienced when it came to men. I felt stupid and cynical at the same time.

  But Mason had changed all that.

  “Laundry is in there if you got stuff to wash.”

  I blushed, immediately imaging my underthings swishing around in Mason’s washing machine.

  “Thank you.”

  “Stop thanking me. I’m the asshole who didn’t notice you guys were in this situation.”

  I blinked, finally looking up at him. He was upset. I knew that.

  I hadn’t realized how upset he was.

  “This isn’t your fault. We’ve been at the motel most nights anyway. After that first shift, I had enough money to get by.”

  The muscle in his jaw flexed but he didn’t say a word.

  Paton came in at that moment, looking freshly scrubbed.

  “That smells so good.”

  Mason gave her a smile and flipped a pancake with a flourish. He’d been brooding since we got here but she walked in and BAM- he had a smile for her.

  He really was an amazing guy.

  And there was no way we could intrude on him this way.

  I stood up.

  “We should really be going.”

  Mason gave me a hard look. Then he put some pancakes on a plate and put it in front of Paton.

  “Here’s some syrup and butter…” He knelt down by her chair. “We are going to be right back, sweetie. Eat slow and chew your food.”

  He lowered his voice to a whisper.

  “And if you let Besos lick your plate clean he will be your friend for life.”

  Then he stood up and held out his hand. I stared at it, alarmed.

  “Michelle.”

  There was command in that voice. Authority. He was older. He was a man. He was my boss. And this was his house.

  I put my hand in his, trying to ignore the thrill that ran through me.

  He lifted me to my feet and put his hand on the small of my back, guiding me out of the house and back to the street.

  Finally he let go of me and I wrapped my arms around me, feeling bereft.

  “I told you, you aren’t going anywhere.”

  “I know. But it’s not right. We can’t just move in.”

  “You can and you will. I will be escorting you to and from work. We can find a babysitter for Pate. And you will not be working late nights anymore.”

  “I won’t?”

  “No. It’s not safe.”

  He was so strong and serious. I felt myself wanting to agree with everything he said. To lean my head against his chest and let him wrap his arms around me.

  “I can take care of myself.”

  He shook his head slowly.

  “Michelle, honey, you can’t. There’s stuff going on around here that
you don’t understand.”

  “You barely know us!”

  He stepped closer, staring into my eyes. Every time single time he got near to me I got goosebumps. I felt my nipples get hard as pebbles.

  “I do know you.” His fingers traced my jawline. “You know I do.”

  I looked away, frightened by the intensity in his gaze.

  He cursed and tipped my chin up.

  “I am not expecting anything. You are not here because I kissed you. Do you hear me?”

  I nodded.

  “I didn’t think that you wanted… anything.”

  “Well, what I want is another story. But that has nothing to do with anything. You are safe here. That includes from me.”

  Safe.

  That sounded so nice. I didn’t even remember what that felt like.

  I was safe. Paton… safe.

  He put his hand on my lower back again and guided me inside.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Mason

  I stared hungrily at her lips as she ate another bite of the pancakes. Paton was coloring happily beside her with Besos curled up at her feet.

  It was a perfect scene of domestic bliss.

  But it was also torture.

  I’d told her I wouldn’t touch her. Wouldn’t kiss her again. I told her I didn’t expect anything.

  But that didn’t mean I wouldn’t want anything. I did. I wanted everything.

  “So, is Pate coming with us? Or we could call a sitter?”

  Michelle swallowed, pushing a damp strand of hair over her shoulder. She’d showered while Pate and I had pancakes. I’d made an extra batch for Michelle, despite her protests.

  In the bright light of morning, I could see how thin she was. Paton looked healthy, but her mom… I had never seen her up close like this in daylight.

  And it burned me to the core.

  Of course, she had been giving Paton all her meals. Of course, she had. She was the perfect mama bear.

  And she had been starving.

  She had been eating slowly, carefully, as if she hadn’t seen this much food in a long time. I could see the look of ecstasy on her face as she chewed. It made me feel like a monster. I’d been obsessing over her looks and she’d been literally wasting away.

  Well, no more. And never again. I’d see to it, even if it ripped my guts out being so close to her.

 

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