by Joanna Blake
What the hell was I doing?
She was staring up at me, hopeful. Ready to please me. Ready to repay me.
I cursed and pushed her away.
“Sorry. I didn’t… I didn’t mean to do that.”
She just stared at me. I opened the bathroom door. I couldn’t even look at her. If I did, I might do something unthinkable.
I would take advantage of her. Up against the counter. With her little girl less than ten feet away.
I was a fucking animal and I shouldn’t have touched her.
“I’m going out. There’s… stew in the fridge. Just heat it up.”
I didn’t say what we were both thinking.
I didn’t say it, but she knew.
That she should be in bed with the door locked before I got back.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Michelle
Again.
He’d kissed me again.
That couldn’t be a fluke. He must like me, at least a little. I couldn’t figure out why he kept pushing me away though.
Maybe he didn’t know why he liked me. Or he didn’t want to feel the way he did. Or he liked someone else, too.
Oof, that hurt. Jealousy cut into me like a knife.
I didn’t want to think about that. Besides, there were zero signs of a female presence in his life, other than Cassandra and Kelly, who were like family to him.
I squeezed my eyes shut and pulled Paton into my side.
Maybe it was my ratty clothes. Maybe that’s why he’d done what he did. Maybe he didn’t want to be seen with me the way I looked now.
Hot tears of humiliation threatened to spill over. I took a deep breath and slowly pulled my arm out from under Pate. If I was going to cry, I was doing it in the bathroom.
Alone.
I carefully shut the bedroom door behind me and tiptoed down the hallway. I was reaching for the bathroom door when I heard it.
Muttering.
“Mason?”
I stared into the kitchen. Mason was sitting by a half empty bottle of bourbon with his head slumped into his hands. He looked up sharply and I took a step back from the hungry look in his eyes.
“Michelle…”
The way he said my name sounded like a prayer. I stepped forward, wringing my hands together nervously.
“Are you alright?”
He took a good look at me and moaned.
“What are you wearing? Are you trying to kill me, Michelle?”
I looked down at myself in confusion. It was a plain white cotton nightie with a tiny pink bow at the neck. Not remotely sexy. It was one of the few things I still had from growing up.
“It’s just an old nightgown.”
He shook his head.
“No. It’s… just don’t come any closer.”
“Maybe you should have some water and go to bed.”
I went to get him a glass but he stopped me, his tone harsh and his breathing ragged.
“Stay back. I’m no good for you.”
“That’s not true… you are a good person, Mason.”
He smiled bitterly.
“Oh, but I’m not. If you knew what I wanted to do…”
He shook his head and took a swig of the dark honey colored liquor from a tumbler. He didn’t look at me again.
“Go back to bed, Michelle.”
I exhaled sharply, my earlier tears forgotten. He did want me. There wasn’t something wrong with me after all. For some reason this incredible man thought he wasn’t good enough. For me, of all people.
I don’t know when I got angel’s wings, but I was well aware I wasn’t perfect. Pregnant at sixteen from the first boy who paid me a lick of attention. Protective and painfully shy ever since. Uneducated, though not a dummy. Barely getting by.
I thought I was almost a good mother, always finding creative ways to have fun and make memories. I was a decent cook and good with a needle and thread. But the circumstances we’d been in were awful for the past few months, and I doubted I would ever forgive myself for letting things get so bad.
The one thing I knew I had done right was Paton. I was raising an extraordinary young woman. My daughter was bright and kind and considerate. She looked below Mason’s gruff exterior and saw his heart of gold.
I knew that no matter what else had happened, Paton knew without a doubt that she was loved.
And I was going to do better. I had to. I’d protect her whether I had a man or not. I was saving up money quickly now, especially since Mason refused to let me chip in for gas or groceries.
But this… whatever this was happening between Mason and I… this was something else.
I wanted Mason as a man. My body ached for him whenever he was nearby. But it was more than that. It wasn’t just for myself that I wanted him. I knew he was already becoming like a father to my girl. It didn’t mean I would give myself to someone I didn’t want, but it took away a lot of my reservations about getting into a relationship. He was a good man and he was good for us. And I had to sit on my hands to keep from touching him in the car, or just sitting on the couch watching television.
So I didn’t just want him.
I craved him.
I slipped under the covers and Pate immediately snuggled closer. I stroked her hair idly while my mind wandered. I’d made a decision, standing there in the kitchen in my nightgown.
I was going to get my man. Even if it didn’t last. Even if it was a disaster. I wanted him, even if it was only a fleeting taste of happiness.
It would be enough.
And maybe, just maybe, we could have something real.
Tomorrow night was Kelly’s party. I peeked into one of the bags he had loaded into our room and smiled. There was a denim mini skirt in there that was too big for Pate. I felt a warm rush of heat. He’d bought this sexy thing for me.
I pulled out a top designed to look like a bustier and bit my lip. I’d never worn anything so revealing in my life. But it wasn’t cheap looking. It looked designer, I thought as I ran my fingers over the lace.
Oh yeah, Mason was in for a big surprise.
He wanted me too. Why else would he do something like that? But some stupid notion about him not being a good man was holding him back.
Whatever the issue was, I was going to get to the bottom of it. Even if I had to use my legs to do it.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kelly
I sighed dreamily, looking in my rearview mirror. He was still there. A big man on an even bigger bike.
Cain was following me again.
Usually it was one of his men, but every now and then, he ‘escorted’ me places without asking permission.
I knew it wasn’t to menace me. I knew he was only staying away because I hadn’t told my brother to go to hell when he’d stopped us from dancing at his wedding.
In fact, Connor had put a tail on me for weeks after the wedding to keep Cain away from me. I told him it was irresponsible to misuse federal funds that way and he agreed.
So he put the tail on Cain.
I sighed, rubbing the bridge of my nose. I was tempted to pull over and ask him what he wanted. Though the truth was, no matter how innocent I might be, I had a pretty good idea of what that was.
According to Cass, the President of the Untouchables MC was a reasonable man. Not kind, but not evil. Not a drunk or a junkie or a manwhore. Just… serious. Intense. Unrelenting. He planned everything and followed those plans without variation.
And he didn’t have club skanks constantly crawling all over him either.
In fact, he was apparently as monkish as Mason.
And that was saying something.
I’d made the mistake of going out on a date a few months ago, just to see what would happen. One date. It was nice, if nothing earth shattering. My date called me the next day and said he couldn’t see me again. He’d sounded scared. I heard beeping in the background which made me belatedly realize the guy had been in the ER.
So, apparently Cai
n wouldn’t ask me out himself, but he wouldn’t let me date anyone else either.
Real nice, buddy.
Still, I couldn’t help but find all that manly possessiveness intriguing. Everything about him made me tingle. His gorgeous body. The leather. The darkness of his arresting eyes. And the craggy, old hollywood planes of his face.
I pulled into Mason’s and he kept riding. I stared after him, wondering if I was ever going to get to go on a date in this lifetime.
Probably not. Not unless Connor eased up. Or until Cain got sick of waiting.
Or I moved away.
Far away.
I sighed and walked to the kitchen door, knocking briefly and letting myself in.
Two adorable faces looked up at me from the kitchen table where they were staring at a pile of paperwork.
“Who is ready to paaartttyyyy!”
They both blinked at me like pretty owls. I frowned. realizing something more was going on.
“What’s up?”
“Mom doesn’t want to put Mason’s address as our permanent address.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to, and I’m so grateful he offered. But we might be getting an apartment soon and…”
Michelle trailed off and my heart constricted. She looked so lost. And I knew Mason would never let her leave, anyway.
The man was clearly in love with her.
“Paton honey, why don’t you go in your room for a minute so the grown-ups can talk?”
She nodded, first running to press a kiss to my cheek. We were fast friends after one play date. I pulled out a chair and leaned my elbows on the table.
“What’s wrong, sweetie?”
She gave me a quick look and I saw it all. She was torn up inside over this.
“Don’t you like Mason?”
She nodded.
“You don’t want to be with him?”
“What?”
Now she looked alarmed. Maybe I’d misread the situation on her end. I was trying to think of a way to back out of this slowly.
“We’re sleeping in Cassie’s old room. Paton and I.”
I nodded slowly, not quite understanding.
“The man refuses to touch me! He keeps being nice and doing too much but now he won’t even look at me!”
Realization broke. She did want him. He was the one mucking things up.
Of course, since he was the ultimate seasoned bachelor, I should have known he wouldn’t know how to handle the situation.
“Honey, men are like horses. You got to lead them to water if you want them to take a drink.”
She stared at me for a minute before bursting into laughter. The clear sound of her laugh was contagious. Soon we were both giggling like schoolgirls. We laughed so hard that we cried.
We were still wiping our cheeks off a few minutes later.
“You know, I was thinking the same thing.”
“What did you have in mind?”
“Well, he bought me a miniskirt… I don’t know if he picked it all out or if the salesperson chose some of it. But I thought maybe I should make it a little harder for him to push me away.”
“I like the way your mind works.” I winked. “Mason won’t know what hit him.”
Two hours later and Paton’s shiny blond hair was in ringlets, expertly teased out with my trusty old curling iron. She looked pretty as a peach. I swear the kid was making my ovaries ache for a little angel of my own.
But mama bear was my real masterpiece.
I stood back and stared in awe at Michelle. I leaned in, wanting to see when she finally got a look of herself in a mirror. She looked like a model. A sexy model in a music video.
She looked like a model in a music video.
Her long legs were shown to advantage by the mini, which was just shy of scandalous. Her lithe but shapely figure was cinched into a corset top and she wore high-heeled black booties on her feet.
“Legs for days.”
She gave me a panicked look in the mirror.
“I can’t do this. It’s too much.”
I grinned, imagining Mason’s reaction. The red stain on her pouty lips. The sparkle in her eyes, subtly lined with smokey shadow. The long, auburn waves that slid over her shoulders and framed her lovely face.
She was beyond gorgeous. No man could resist her. Not even Mason.
“Honey, trust me. That is just right.”
“He’s going to be mad.”
I shrugged.
“It’s his own damn fault. He should be handling things better. This is a wake up call.”
She arched a brow at me in the mirror.
“You know, you are awfully young to be giving such worldly advice.”
I waved my hand dramatically.
“I’m an old soul, dahling.”
She shook her head and laughed, sending tousled waves over her bare shoulders. I gave her a stern look.
“You care about Mason, right?”
She nodded.
“And he cares about you?”
“I think so… he took us in. And…”
“And what?”
“Well, he kissed me. Twice.”
I rubbed my hands together. This was getting good.
“Oh he did, did he?”
“Yes but he pushed me away after. You won’t repeat that, will you?”
I shook my head.
“Never.”
“Are you sure about this? Because I think I’m in love with him.”
The heartbroken look on her face nearly did me in. She was such a sweet girl and Mason deserved someone good. Both Cassie and I thought so and worried about him constantly.
We’d just never imagined anyone this good for him.
Angels were a little hard to come by when you spent your time in a honky-tonk bar.
“All you need is a halo.”
“Huh?”
I smiled.
“Nothing. Okay Mich, let’s do this.”
“Mich?” She smiled at me nervously. “I like it.”
Paton wolf whistled when her mom came into the kitchen. Michelle almost bolted but together, Paton and I managed to drag her out to my car.
“Now, it’s my birthday so I will be having an adult beverage or two. You guys are going to need Mason to drive you home. That, or you sleep over with the rest of us.”
I gave them a conspiratorial smile.
“Which sounds like fun, if you ask me.”
They giggled as I turned the ignition and pulled out into the road.
I couldn’t stop smiling, already imagining the fireworks coming out of Mason’s ears when we walked in. I was practically rubbing my hands together with glee in anticipation.
Like I told Michelle, it was his own damn fault.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Mason
“Nobody should ever be this pregnant.”
Cassie moaned, her hand on her belly. I shook my head, popping a flakey little square into my mouth. The food was good. I nursed a beer. I’d only have one since I was driving the girls home later.
“Hmmm, that’s good… it tastes like… cheese?”
“You like? Connor’s been baking.”
I choked back a laugh which earned me a glare from the kitchen. Con was in fact, wearing an apron as he served snacks and drinks to the party goers. Kelly still lived at home with their mom, so that’s where the party was.
Con looked right at home in the pristine suburban mid-century home. He should, since he grew up here. Come to think of it, he also looked at home in the rustic but luxurious cabin Cass and he lived in, all the way up in the hills.
He looked kind of at home at the Mason Jar too.
The man was a damned chameleon.
We exchanged dirty looks and went back to ignoring each other.
I liked the sonofabitch, but I’d never tell him that. Had to keep him on his toes so he didn’t start slacking with my little girl. I caught her hiding a smile and realized she was onto me.
“He li
kes you too.”
I puffed my chest out.
“Course he does. The man is not an complete idiot.”
She laughed and then groaned, holding her belly. She really was about to pop. She bitched and moaned but I knew she was happy as a clam.
“Did you guys work things out then?”
“He’s been home constantly. He makes sure he’s there to tuck me in every night. And he checks in during the day.” She leaned in to whisper. “There was another murder.”
I nodded solemnly, deciding not to mention the club girls.
“I know.”
I thought about my goddaughter Daniella, who was tucked upstairs for the night. I realized I might need a bigger place. As the de facto Grandpa, I should be able to host sleepovers too.
The door opened and I heard Kelly’s voice. People shouted happy birthday and rushed to hug her. But I wasn’t looking at her.
I was looking at the vision in the doorway behind her.
Michelle stood there, wearing the new clothes I’d got her. The most revealing of all the new clothes I’d gotten her. My mouth dried up and my heart started racing as I looked over those long, flawlessly curvy legs and up to her hourglass figure. She was on the tall side, so you didn’t notice right away, but she was stacked.
And oh God… her face… cherry red lips that I wanted to taste, and even some smudgy stuff on her eyes that made them pop and sparkle. Her hair was down and styled so she looked like a Goddess.
She looked like trouble.
I growled as every male gaze in the room swiveled to stare at her except Con. He was busy bringing over another plate of food to his wife.
Men started gravitating towards the doorway as Paton dragged her mother inside.
MINE.
The thought pulsed through my head again.
MINE.
I was on my feet and crossing the room before I even blinked.
MINE.
I wanted to tear the skimpy clothes off her. I wanted to bury my hands in her hair and kiss her for days. I wanted to do a whole hell of a lot more than that.
But I didn’t do any of those things. Instead I grasped her arm and marched her back out of the house and onto the front porch.
