by Rosalie Redd
He grabbed her arm to steady her. “I’m sorry—”
“Are you ok?”
“Yes—no—aw craya, I don’t know.” He wiped his hand down his face. His inner Stiyaha beat against his will, breaking it down, breaking him down. His beast wanted freedom, to be let out of its emotional cage and to live as it once had. Clamping down on his own emotions and subjugating the beast, he fought himself for control.
“Please, tell me.”
She touched the back of his hand, causing a shiver to run up his arm. His pulse raced as he made his decision. He would bare his soul to her, his little kitten. Regardless of what happened, he would tell her everything.
“My mother caught the scourge. She must have contracted the disease from one of the sick while she helped Gaetan in the infirmary. My father often thought kindness would be the death of her, and I guess he was right.” He laughed, his solemn tone rough with pain. “I was young, barely a mid-youth and had returned to the Keep from my first battle.” As images of that horrible time filtered through his mind, he told her the story.
The smell of pine and fresh air followed Noeh and the warriors as the portal closed behind them, but the clean scent did nothing to squash the stench of blood and illness that permeated the Keep. Jadon held his arm at his side, the limb numb and useless from the sting of a Gossum’s tongue. He seemed pale, his brown eyes rimmed red, and he wobbled as he walked.
Jadon sneezed. Spittle flew from his nose and mouth—the first signs of the scourge.
“He’s infected.” A warrior with a bulbous nose pointed at Jadon. The male scurried away, fear evident in his widened eyes and hurried steps. The great scourge didn’t discriminate. Merchants and nobles alike succumbed to its vicious fever, puss-filled sores, and brutal cough.
“Let’s get you to the infirmary.” Noeh wrapped his arm around Jadon’s waist and flung his comrade’s arm over his shoulder.
Saar ran up to Noeh. His own cuts and bruises were evidence of the recent battle. “Let me take Jadon. Gaetan is looking for you.”
As Saar took the warrior, Noeh stared at his sick friend. This would be the last time he’d ever see him. A pang of regret hit him in the chest.
Gaetan hobbled across the Portal Navigation Center, his hurried steps slowed by his deformed leg. He peered around, searching, and when he found Noeh, he stilled. “Noeh, come quick, your mother has contracted the illness.”
Noeh stared at Gaetan’s face, reading much more than could ever be said. “She doesn’t have long, does she?”
Gaetan’s gaze darted to the stone floor, then returned. “No, not long. She’s been asking for you.”
“Where is she? Is my father with her?”
“Yes, they are in their bedchamber.”
Noeh turned around, but Gaetan caught him on the arm. “Wait, there’s something else you need to know. Your father isn’t long for this world, either.”
The bonding. Noeh’s beast roared. He would’ve changed into his beast to let off some steam if the circumstances weren’t so dire.
“Craya! Damn the bonding!” Noeh ripped his arm away from Gaetan, and ran down the corridor, his feet pounding on the hard stone floor.
As he reached his parent’s bedchamber, he stopped outside their door. His mother coughed. She sounded so frail, so pained.
He rested his arm and head against the hard wooden door. The familiar smell of oak and the coolness of the wood did nothing to ease the pain in his chest. As he breathed in deep, the cool air calmed him. He wanted to be under complete control to face what was on the other side.
He knocked.
“Enter,” his father said.
As he slipped into the room, the bitter smell of impending death greeted him.
His mother lay on her bed, the green and blue comforter tucked over her bosom. Her blond hair flowed around her shoulders. Its shine and softness contrasted with the red sores that marred her once beautiful face.
She coughed again. Spittle and blood ejected into the handkerchief his father held to her mouth. Seated in the chair next to his queen, his father seemed to have aged. His once strong and handsome face was creased and pale from worry.
“Noeh.” His mother reached out her hand as another round of coughs racked her body. When she could breathe again, she smiled, the light not quite reaching her eyes. “My son—”
Noeh clasped her fingers in his palm. “Rest, Mother, conserve your energy.”
“My son, I have something for you. Nicholai, please remove my necklace.”
A lump formed in Noeh’s throat, and he tried to speak, but his mouth was dry. With great care, his father unclasped the heavy necklace from around his mother’s neck. Made of gold, the queen’s necklace was inlaid with two precious jewels, a red sunstone and a green sunstone, cut to fit together to form a perfect circle.
As his father placed the necklace into Noeh’s open palm, he recited the ancient scripture. “Red for passion, green for temperance, may you have both in equal quantity.”
Queen Leonna peered at Noeh, the once vibrant blue of her eyes now pale and milky. “My son, give this to your future queen as a gift from me.”
“It’s beautiful, Mother. Any female would be blessed to receive this necklace.” He chose his words well, careful not to commit to anything. With a heavy heart, he placed the necklace into his pocket. “Is there anything I can do for you, Mother?”
She didn’t respond. Her face was still, unmoving, her eyes lifeless.
Noeh gasped.
“She’s gone.” His father closed his queen’s eyes and kissed her hand.
“She was the love of my life, as you know.” His father smiled with a faraway look in his eyes. A single tear escaped, running a path down the rough side of his nose.
Noeh’s vision blurred, and the world slowed. She was gone? She couldn’t be gone. No! Clenching his fists, he lifted his head and roared, the sound reverberating through the room. With moist eyes, he glanced at his father.
His father still held his mother’s hand when her fingers crumbled to dust. Letting out a roar of his own, King Nicholai launched himself from the chair and beat his chest with his fists. The sound of bone breaking brought Noeh out of his mental fog. He grabbed his father’s arms before he could do further damage to himself.
“She’s no longer in pain.” Noeh stared his father in the eyes.
The old king relaxed, his arms going limp in Noeh’s grip. Noeh let him go, his own body shaking.
“You’re a good son.” Tears welled in his father’s eyes. “You will be a great king.”
His father pulled him into an embrace. Noeh’s chest expanded. He cherished the infrequent, close contact with his father and treasured his father’s love and support.
King Nicholai placed his hands on Noeh’s arms. “I will join your mother soon, back on Lemuria. As her bonded mate, it is my duty to stay with her always, in life and in death. Do not be sad for me, my son. I have no desire to live without her. Someday, you’ll understand when you bond to your queen.”
“Is it worth it, Father?” He looked at the two black bonding bands surrounding his father’s throat. “Our kingdom needs you to lead our kind in the war against the Gossum. How will we get along without you? How will I?”
“That is your responsibility now, my son. You will lead them well. You are ready.”
“No, I’m not. I’m still a mid-youth, barely of age.” Heat flushed up Noeh’s neck, and his ears burned.
“You have no choice. My time here is done, and you must take my place as king.” His father’s gaze swirled with love and compassion. “You will lead them, and they will follow you. You are my son, and you will be king.”
As his mother’s last bit of flesh turned to sand, King Nicholai slumped to the floor.
“No, Father!” Noeh dragged the old king to the chair. “Father, Father!” He tried to rouse him, but he was gone. Noeh kneeled next to the one male he’d always been able to count on.
“You were a great ki
ng, Father. I only hope to be as great as you.” He grasped his father’s hand and removed the sunstone ring. His fingers shook as he placed the king’s ring on his right middle finger.
“I accept this ring and will honor all those who have worn it before me.” The weight of his commitment wrapped around him like a ball and chain.
His father’s body crumbled to dust.
Screeeee. Leaning against the wall, Nicholai’s sword shrieked an unholy, miserable sound at the death of its partner.
“Another sword to place in the Hall of Warriors.” Noeh lowered his head and touched the hilt of his own blade in comfort. He took a long breath and stared at the piles of dust that used to be his parents.
His chest ached with loss. He shook his head and blinked back unshed tears. Anger, hot and torrid, raced through his veins, overwhelming him with its intensity.
“Father, the bonding is a curse. You couldn’t save her, and your connection to her cost you your life. Your selfishness left a child to rule a kingdom. You expect me to take a queen, but I refuse to follow the scriptures by tying myself to a female Stiyaha. I vow this to myself.”
The heaviest commitment he’d ever made in his young life brought him to his knees. He struggled to breathe as the promise wound its way throughout his body and into his soul. Every muscle and fiber within him took in his words. His inner beast screamed at his own betrayal.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Melissa’s heart ached for Noeh. She moved her hand up his arm, offering comfort as best she could. It was hard not to think about the firm muscles under his woven shirt as her fingers brushed over his bicep.
He still sat in his chair, one of the few pieces of furniture in his bedchamber. His head rested in his hands, and his fingers splayed across his face. The battle-worn warrior had opened his heart to her, exposed his inner-most secret, and his vulnerability touched her deeply.
“That must have been tough for you. To watch your parents die at such a young age.”
“It changed me, and not for the better, I’m afraid.”
His quiet laugh was self-deprecating, and she could sense his pain in the deep timbre of his voice. If she could take away his suffering, if only for a moment, she would.
Her heart skipped a beat. “What happens if you break your vow?”
He glanced at her, and his eyes narrowed. “You mean, when I take my queen?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
“In my anger, I made a vow I have regretted since the moment I gave it.” He held her gaze, and the intensity in his eyes made her chest ache.
He stood and moved away from her, placing his hand on the back of the worn wooden chair. This time, he didn’t look at her when he spoke. “I condemned my soul.”
He paused for a moment, the stillness in the air like a heavy weight. “When I take my queen, I will break my own promise. My soul will bear the scar, and when I die, my spirit won’t be allowed back in Lemuria.”
A drop of fear eased its way into her gut. “What will happen to your soul?”
“My essence will fade into the ether, the space between space, never to be reborn again.”
Melissa couldn’t breathe as she absorbed his words and the implications of his vow. His spirit would no longer exist. He would—disappear.
“Why did you agree to bond to a queen? You could’ve remained a warrior and kept your soul.”
He didn’t respond, and a tic started in his cheek. His lips pursed and his jaw tightened. He wasn’t going to answer. She thought about his character, what she’d learned about him, and the truth bloomed in her mind.
She walked over to him, forcing him to look at her. “You did it for your kind. You sacrificed yourself to help them.”
“It’s what a king does.” He shrugged.
“You are…an honorable male.” Her breathing picked up as she tried to control her emotions. A tear threatened at the corner of her eye. She couldn’t stop it as it slid down her cheek.
He wiped the moisture away with a soft caress. His gentle touch ignited a fresh batch, and they spilled over her lashes.
“Little kitten.” His low comforting voice only added to her anguish.
She ran her fingers over his marking and rested her hand at the back of his neck. As she gazed into the eyes of this male she’d fallen for, her chest constricted. Before she could stop herself, she stood on her toes and kissed him. She poured all of her love for him into her kiss, pressing her mouth hard against his, bruising her own lips.
His response was instantaneous. He wrapped one hand in her hair, the other around her waist, trapping her in his grasp. Returning her kiss, he devoured her lips like she was his last meal. The heat between them escalated to a new level, and she was lost to him, completely at his mercy.
He stilled, and released her, pushing her away. He shook his head from side to side, as if trying to clear his mind.
“What’s wrong?” She didn’t understand his reaction. A mixture of confusion and rejection swirled in her head.
His slack expression turned hard. He circled her, his predatory glare turning possessive. His agitation grew by the second. He breathed through clenched teeth, his eyes now a vibrant orange.
He seemed menacing, but she didn’t fear him. On the contrary, the possessiveness in his eyes excited her. Hot sweat drenched her dress, the soft fabric clinging to her skin. She wanted to feel the power and strength of his body. Fighting her own selfish desires, she put her hands out, palms up, to try to calm him.
He took a step back and appeared confused, his head tilting to the side as he studied her. His gaze roamed down her body. He sniffed the air, a low growl erupting from his throat.
Her body responded to his glare, her nipples hardening under her tight dress, straining against the soft fabric. They would protrude and show through the cloth, and that made them tighten all the more. She wanted him, but the last time this had happened hadn’t ended well. The rejection still stung.
She wasn’t going to get hurt again. Not. Going. There.
Crossing her arms in front of her chest, she blocked her nipples from his view. She lashed out with her only weapon against him, her words. “You pull me in, then push me away. What are you so afraid of?”
His eyebrows shot up at her question and he blinked. He put his hand over his eyes and hunched over, as if he were in pain. “Ahhhh—”
He stumbled away from her in a rage, ran to his desk, and swiped everything on the surface into the air. Charcoal pencils, erasers, and pens ricocheted off the wall. His crown crashed to the floor. Loose papers fluttered through the air. One in particular caught her attention.
She stared at the paper as it fell to the ground—a sketch of her, drawn in charcoal, wearing a necklace with two crystals. It was the necklace Noeh had described from his memory. Lightheaded and dizzy, the ramifications of the picture hit her. He cared for her, maybe even more than he realized.
He leaned over his desk, his large hands flat against the wooden surface. His head hung down, and he breathed in large, quick breaths, his body shaking.
“I’m afraid…to bond to a female.” He spoke so quietly, she almost didn’t hear him.
She placed her hand on his back and rubbed his broad shoulders. His hard muscles under the soft texture of his woven shirt made the nerves on her hands extra-sensitive.
He must be afraid to lose his soul, but there seemed to be something more. She had to know what it was. “Why?”
He strained against the desk, his muscles bulging as he pressed his weight down into the wood. The desk creaked and popped under the pressure. His breathing accelerated, his breaths ragged and rough. The once loose fabric of his shirt stretched tight over his skin.
“Leave me, now!”
The Keep rumbled. Small shards of rock fell from the ceiling, pelting their bodies.
Melissa stepped back as Noeh changed, his body getting bigger right before her eyes. Riiippppp. His shirt tore down the middle, and he flung the garment to the floor. L
ong blond hair grew over his entire body. His pants disappeared under the fur that covered his skin.
“No, I won’t leave you. Not like this.” Her heartbeat loud in her ears, she held her ground.
“Run!” He grunted the nearly unintelligible word.
The room quieted, his ragged breaths the only sound in the stillness. He raised his head and looked over his shoulder at her. The tall handsome male with the pale blue eyes no longer existed. In front of her, a beast towered.
A large brow ridge hung over his amber eyes. His flattened nose twitched as he sniffed the air. He turned to face her. As he opened his mouth, two large canines protruded from his jaw.
Her first instinct was to flee, but she held the urge in check.
“Noeh.” She said his name in an effort to reach past the beast. Settling her hand on his arm, his hair was thick beneath her palm.
His eyes narrowed, their eerie glow casting an orange light as his feral gaze wandered down her body.
“Mine.”
He grabbed her, crushing her against him. Her small frame barely reached his chest as he topped out at over nine feet tall. His large arms enveloped her in an embrace so strong she struggled to breathe. He moved fast, rushing across the room and pinning her back against the door.
Although he was a beast, he was still Noeh. She wanted him, but she wanted the man, not the beast. His hair caressed her cheek as her face lay against his strong abs. Contrary to his appearance, his hair was smooth and soft. She struggled and tried to push him away.
“Noeh, please,” she stammered.
He growled again, the sound possessive and demanding. Placing his hand on the door next to her head, he tried to touch her with his finger but it was too large. He roared his frustration, and the sound reverberating off the walls hurt her ears. His downcast mouth made his canines protrude further from his face, and his nose quivered.
