“Yes. Everything seems fine. I examined her just now. She fell asleep after I told her there were no signs of distress or injury.”
Elias let out a long breath. “Good to know, Brother.” Evan didn’t need company at the moment, so Elias went to the where the dishes were stacked and began cleaning them. Immediately, the dogs nudged at his legs, hoping he’d grant them some scraps.
When he finished cleaning up, Evan had gone to bed. Elias noted his brother had left the cup on the table. He’d been so deep in thought that any noise Evan made had escaped him.
After letting the dogs out one last time, Elias finally made his way to the bedroom. Once inside, his wife’s soft breathing settled him. Esther had been too tired to wait up for him tonight.
Despite not wanting to wake her, Elias chuckled. She wanted children and hoped to prove to him they could start a family. He wondered if he’d let her keep the notion they had to make love nightly. Although it was enjoyable, some nights it was comical to find out what she’d do to ensure he complied.
He lowered to the bed after undressing. With a soft smile, he snuggled next to Esther’s warm figure. Soon, they’d discuss what happened in her past. But for the time being, her being there safe and sound was all that mattered to him.
Chapter 16
“It won’t do. It won’t do at all,” Esther blurted. She couldn’t believe what they’d discussed. Filbert and Elias spoke on the front porch as to whether to send Wyatt away. The boy was not to blame for what happened. She rushed to the doorway.
“If anyone is to blame for what happened, it’s you two. You send a young boy who barely knows his way around a horse to take us.”
Elias jerked to face her, a scowl marring his brow. “Go inside, Esther. This does not concern you.”
As if to make a point, he walked down the steps and away from the house. Filbert seemed to be the smartest of the duo at the moment. He hesitated before following.
Esther hobbled outside. “Don’t walk away from me.” Indignation surged. Why would they punish the boy for something he was not to blame for? Sometimes, she wondered about Elias’ lack of genuine caring for his fellow man. It was a wonder he’d allowed Filbert to come live there. From what she’d been told, the man had been badly injured and, although mobile, had not been much help to Elias at first.
“Give me a moment,” Elias said to Filbert. He stalked back toward the house. Jaw tight and lips pressed in a straight line, he came to her and pointed to the interior of the house. “Go inside.”
Esther lifted her chin. “No. Not until I am assured you are not about to do something so unfair.”
“Esther.” He removed his hat and raked his fingers through his too-long hair. “Some decisions are mine to make. I will not explain myself to you. Upon hearing part of our conversation, you have assumed the worst of me. This is twice that you’ve considered me to be cruel. What gives you the impression?”
“You were about to shoot Wyatt that day. And...and I heard you say he had to go, that inexperience put people in danger.”
“I did say that.” He looked to the interior. “Please stay here. I need to calm down before I speak to you.”
She stood her ground. “I will not.” Esther gasped when Elias picked her up not too gently and carried her inside. Upon reaching the center of the living space, he put her on her feet and placed both hands on her shoulders. “Do not push me today. I’m not of a good temper and don’t want to disrespect you. Know your place.”
“My...my place?” Had he just insinuated she was of a lower level? Esther was too flabbergasted to respond. The slamming of the front door vibrated through her and she huffed. “My place, indeed.” She sat down and crossed her arms.
Moments later, horses galloped away. Esther put her sewing down and rushed to the window. Elias, along with four horses tethered together, rode away. Wyatt followed with two.
She hobbled to the front porch to see a laughing Filbert. “What is so funny? How can you just stand by and let him take him away?”
“What? I didn’t know you had a likin’ to him.”
Esther couldn’t believe her ears. “I thought you cared for the boy. If anyone was close to Wyatt, it was you.”
“He’ll be fine. He has Elias to guide him.” Filbert let out another cackle. “That horse, now that’s another story. I’m glad I convinced Elias to finally get rid of it.”
“What?” Esther looked to where riders and horses disappeared. “You were speaking of a horse earlier?”
“Yep, that devil of a horse. Needs to be owned by someone who has time and patience. Elias had a hard time admittin’ he was not the tamer for him.” The old man scratched at his gray beard. “Said to tell you, he’ll be home in time for supper.”
Esther was beyond words at her assumption and could only gawk as Filbert walked away whistling.
The further Elias rode from his home, the stronger the pressure. His chest constricted each time he considered Esther’s words. She thought him a cruel man, had made a judgment based on part of an overheard conversation.
It shouldn’t matter so much. People often made assumptions. However, that his wife would think him a horrible person was different.
Always proud and ensuring to be a man who didn’t require the help or approval of others, this situation was foreign. No matter how many times he repeated that what Esther thought could be easily explained, the feeling of betrayal would not ebb.
“Mr. Elias, are you sure we should go in that direction?” Wyatt interrupted his thoughts. The young boy had called out from behind, his arm extended toward the east.
They’d been going in the wrong direction, who knew for how long while he was lost in ridiculous musings.
“You’re right.” He guided the horses careful to ensure the unwieldy, unbroken one was not overly agitated. Surprisingly, as if joyful to get away from him, the darned critter complied. Meek as a mouse.
Elias considered letting the animal loose. It could be the horse would never break and he wondered how long before the new owner would give up. Then again, it could be he wasn’t the right fit for the horse.
And it could be he wasn’t the right fit for Esther, either.
Chapter 17
“Are you sure about this?” Aurora’s face was etched with concern as she pulled the needle not so gently through the fabric. “Honestly, Esther, you’ve barely been married but a couple of months. Give it time.”
An errant tear slipped down her cheek and Esther ignored it. “I don’t believe we’re suited at all. Not all couples who marry in this fashion, through mail order, are meant to be.” She looked away to the sound of birds singing outside. So deeply in love, of course Aurora didn’t understand her situation.
She and Elias had become more and more distant since the day she’d assumed he was taking Wyatt away. He’d come back rather late and in a sour mood, refusing to talk, stating he was too tired to eat.
Now, he rarely joined her for meals. He often spent the evening at the bunkhouse with Filbert, sleeping there more nights than not.
Often, it was as if she lived in the large home alone, rambling from room to room doing whatever she could to keep busy. When she tried to speak to her husband about things, he would become defensive and shuttered. He was not open at all to any suggestions about the household, much less to a conversation about the state of their marriage.
When he had joined her in bed, it became awkward. Their lovemaking was without tenderness, almost as if he fulfilled a need, but not by choice.
“I do believe I am not attractive to men in a way a woman should be. It feels as if my life is repeating itself. Once again, I am married to a man who’d rather sleep elsewhere. It won’t be long before Elias spends more nights in one of the other bedrooms, you’ll see.”
“Nonsense,” Aurora threw her sewing aside and stood. “Something has to be done. Whatever the problem is, I’m sure it has to do with sentiments and not the physical.” Aurora lowered to sit next to her and
took her by the shoulders. “Tell me again what happened that day. The day he took the horses to sell.”
After Esther explained the misunderstanding, Aurora let out a sigh and nodded. “You hurt his feelings. Have you apologized?”
“I told him I misunderstood and that I was sorry to have judged him based on a partial conversation. He seemed to understand, stating not to fret over it.”
“How do you feel about Elias? What do you admire about him?”
The question unsettled her, took Esther by surprise. If she were to be honest, she’d not expected a good marriage, but more of a relationship based on companionship and reliance on one another than caring.
“I admire that he works hard and does not shun his responsibility to provide. He is a good man, doesn’t raise his voice when angry. Elias is generous with his home and money. Has never once questioned me on what I purchase or how much money I take when coming to town. He trusts me to have the best interests of our home in mind.”
As she spoke warmth spread and, before long, as she continued stating her husband’s virtues, a smile curved her lips. “He is most handsome, don’t you agree? I think he is very attractive, both in face and physically. Oh and he dotes on the dogs. The animals are so pampered now. They would never pose a threat to anyone.” She laughed at recalling just the night before how Elias had explained to the dogs how he’d be gone for a couple days, but not to fret as Wyatt would ensure they were fed and kept company.
Both dogs had sat on their haunches, side by side at attention, as if understanding what Elias said.
“It sounds to me as if you’ve grown to care quite a bit for your husband,” Aurora finally had to interrupt her and both chuckled.
“I do care for him, of course. However, I feel as if he isn’t sure to have made the right decision in marrying. Perhaps not in choosing me specifically, it could be he was not ready for marriage and made the decision in haste.”
“Well, you have a prime opportunity to talk. The ride back means at least two hours of privacy. Ask that he stop and have a conversation without distractions. It could be he admires quite a bit about you as well.”
They’d come to town to purchase necessities. Promptly upon arriving, Elias went with Evan to see about some land they’d purchased. When they’d returned, he’d spent the rest of the time with his brother at the clinic. It had not surprised her. Esther knew the brothers were close and needed the time together. What had been most upsetting was to watch Evan kiss Aurora before leaving the house each time. The two acted as if he were embarking on a long voyage, while Elias barely spared her a glance.
Evan studied Elias for a long time before speaking. The action made Elias’ already reddened face even hotter. “I think you’re making a mistake by distancing yourself from your wife. The misunderstanding doesn’t sound so bad that you would decide the marriage was a mistake.”
“She doesn’t care for me. Not in a way a wife should, anyway.” He looked everywhere except to his brother. “We’ve grown distant. Whenever I am home, it’s as if the silence becomes more and more awkward.”
His brother lifted a brow. “You are quiet by nature, Elias. Perhaps she mistakes it for not caring about her. Do you ask her how her day was? Or how she feels that day?” Evan placed a tray of instruments onto a small table. “Do you not find your wife attractive? She’s a beautiful woman.”
The question was laughable. Of course, he found Esther attractive. His wife was beautiful. “Of course, I find her attractive. She’s a beautiful woman. Everything about her is striking and she has the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.”
“Have you told her that?”
Elias blew out a breath. “I just told you, we rarely talk. I can’t just spout about her eyes out of nowhere.”
“Women like to know what we admire about them. If there is a distance between you, it’s more your fault than hers. Once you set your mind that things are a certain way, there isn’t much that will change it. Brother, either you fix this or your marriage will get worse as time passes. If you allow the distance to grow, it could be Esther will leave and return east or come live in town.”
“She can’t do that.”
“Yes, she can. Did you know your wife is not without resources? Although not wealthy by the standards back east, she is well off and can afford to start a business. She was planning to open a seamstress shop here in town until marrying you. From what Aurora tells me, she is terrified of returning to the situation that forced her to come west to begin with.”
Esther had not mentioned sewing again. Although she sewed and had quite a collection of shirts and dresses hanging in one of the bedrooms, he’d considered that, perhaps, she did so to pass the time and that the clothes were for them.
Had she been building a stockpile to start a shop in town? As the distance had grown, was she already planning to leave him?
“I am not sure what to do at this point. Any kind of change would be awkward.”
Evan chuckled. “Yes, it will be. But rather a few moments of awkwardness than years of misery. Don’t you agree?”
Elias remained quiet, his thoughts going over the fact that, already, the marriage felt more of a burden than not. What he’d looked most forward to was companionship. But lately, it had taken more and more willpower to walk into the silent home, to a wife that barely spoke unless he asked a question. And even when she did, it was only with a brief word or two.
Yes, he was partly to blame for the change in the marriage. He didn’t have a problem shouldering the responsibility. However, Esther would have to make some changes as well. For one thing, any plans his wife had about the future had better include him.
When the brothers came in at suppertime, Esther and Aurora had just finished cooking. Esther placed cups of steaming coffee before them, ensuring to smile at Elias and touch his forearm as she asked if he required anything else.
The action had gotten his attention. His startled gaze moved from where her hand lay on his arm to her face, as if searching for an answer to whatever secret he felt she hid.
Aurora had instructed her to start anew, to court her husband and allow him to know she admired him. It was strange how touching him sent a tingle up her arm. The sensation was not unpleasant, but actually the opposite.
Turning away toward the kitchen, she was thankful to hide the coloring she was sure her face had turned.
They settled to eat. The entire time, both Aurora and Evan directed the conversation to both her and Elias. It was as if they could read each other’s thoughts and didn’t allow an uncomfortable pause.
“Tell the ladies about the time you tried to rescue what you thought was an abandoned dog,” Evan said, looking to Elias.
By the slight curve to his lips, leaning to the side with one elbow on the table, Elias was more at ease than he’d been in a long time. There was a playful light in his eyes when he looked to both Esther and Aurora.
“I found a pup. It was huddled under some brush and was crying. I figured it was hungry, so decided to pick it up and bring it home. Out of nowhere a mama wolf came out. She snarled and growled, her hackles up, until I put the pup back.” Elias chuckled. “I thought that was it. Back away and she’d let things be. But mama wolf would not stop snarling and she moved closer with each step I took back.”
Evan laughed. “You should have seen how fast he ran toward the house, the wolf hot on his heels.”
“She didn’t bite you, did she?” Esther asked trying hard not to laugh.
“No, but she nipped at my ankles a couple times.”
When the laughter ebbed, Elias looked to Evan. “How about the time that snake scared you and you fell off the ladder in the barn.” He looked to the women with a wide smile. “He screamed. Sounded like a cat in heat.”
“Elias, you shouldn’t say such things.” Esther attempted to keep a straight face but, instead, laughed. “I’m sorry Evan.”
The evening came to an end too soon. Although things had thawed a bit betw
een her and Elias, Esther was nervous to see what would happen now that everyone prepared to go to bed.
Figuring her husband would remain in the front of the house until she fell asleep, Esther didn’t bother to ask.
A sharp pain on her arm made her squeak and everyone looked to her. “I hit my elbow,” she lied, sliding a glance at Aurora who’d pinched her.
Her friend gave her a pointed look and then she slid a glance to Elias, who’d gone to stand by the hearth. “Ask him to join you. Or maybe if he requires anything else? Say something,” Aurora whispered and then hurried away in the direction of the bedrooms.
Feeling foolish when the butterflies fluttered in her stomach, Esther walked slowly in the same direction. Then she stopped and faced Elias, who met her gaze.
“I truly enjoyed getting to know more about you,” Esther said. “It was nice to see you smile.”
He seemed at a loss for words, the awkwardness taking over at them being alone. “It’s good to be here with my brother.” Her throat constricted at him clearly stating the light mood had nothing to do with her. “Yes, I can see you’re very close.”
“Let’s go to bed. We have to get up early and head home. I don’t want Filbert having to deal with everything alone.” Although he took her arm to guide her, Esther didn’t sense any warmth in his mannerisms. They were more mechanical than with any caring.
Why had they allowed for such awkwardness between them? They were husband and wife. As far as she was concerned, they were attracted to one another.
Once inside the bedroom, Elias sat down and removed his boots. After he stood and began undressing. Esther undressed as well while watching her husband. He was quite attractive, his body well formed. In that moment, she realized she’d not admired him in quite a while. She’d been too engrossed in avoiding him.
Esther, An Easter Bride (Brides for all Seasons Book 4) Page 8
