“I know. I told you that but you wouldn’t listen.”
Josh sighs and digs his face into my neck. “I’m an idiot. I honestly can’t blame you if you leave me.”
“Is that what you want?”
He rolls me over so we can face each other. “Hell no. Joey, since I came home and found Bronx here I’ve been a fucking mess. Every day … hell, probably ten times a day, I texted him asking if he’s heard from you so I know if you’re okay. I hated that you left your home because of the cancer I brought into our lives. God, baby, you’re everything to me and if I have to spend the rest of my life making up for Jules and her bullshit, I will.”
Josh pushes my hair behind my ear and my eyes close at the simple gesture. When I look at him his eyes have changed from sadness to longing. “Being without you these past few days have been torture. I show up on set looking like a fucking mess and my day doesn’t get much better. Coming home to an empty house is the worst possible feeling when I know I could’ve prevented this. Everything that happened is my fault and I’m sorry.”
“Did you go to the doctors with her?”
He shakes his head. “Never. The only place outside of our home that I have seen Jules without you is the day before filming at the coffee shop. She showed up after I had a meeting with Barry. I told her then, the same thing I’ve told her repeatedly, that I’m in love with you and she needed to learn to accept that because it wasn’t going to change.”
I lean into Josh and let him hold me. The warmth of this touch, the calmness of his breathing and the way his body intermingles with mine lulls me to sleep. It’s restless, but still more than I’ve had in the past few days.
When I wake, I’m alone. The wall of windows is open and I can see the soft glow of the fireplace outside. Josh is sitting by the fire, spread out on the couch with his feet hanging over the edge.
“Hey,” I say, trying to alert him to my presence.
“Hey.” He sits up and pats the spot next to him. “How’d you sleep?”
“Better than I have the past few days.”
“Yeah I haven’t slept at all.”
I don’t know what I’m supposed to say to that so I stay tight-lipped and focus on the flame coming out of the fireplace.
“I’m sorry for leaving, Josh. There really isn’t an excuse other than I panicked and was really fed up with all the shit going on surrounding her.”
“I know. I don’t blame you, Joey. I only wish you had called.”
Shaking my head, I pull my legs up and wrap my arms around them. “I couldn’t. I’d hear your voice and forget why I left and I’d be back to square one.”
“I figured.”
“Thing is, I never asked to be matched to you, that was done for us and I couldn’t be happier. I love you. I’ve fallen so deeply in love that nothing should matter, except it does. I can’t have her in my life, ruining everything. She’s the type of person that if you give her an inch, she’s taking a mile. First it’s my dress, next it will be a vacation, or down the road Christmas morning.”
Josh pulls me into his lap and holds me. “I promise I won’t let that happen. If, and it’s a big if, the baby is mine we’ll have a custody agreement in place. My new lawyer says those are pretty solid so if she violates it, she can go to jail.”
“What do you mean, ‘big if’?”
He sighs and kisses my cheek. My whole body reacts, screaming at me to kiss him back, but I hold back. “Bronx shared some information and the likelihood that the baby is mine is very slim. I already went down to the hospital and did the DNA swab and I paid to have a rush job done so we should know once she does her part tomorrow.”
“Do you know how foolish I’ll feel if the baby isn’t yours?”
“You?” he asks, laughing. “I’ve been walking on eggshells for months because I didn’t want you to leave me. You’re not leaving me, are you?” His words are hopeful, yet pleading.
“No, I’m not.”
“That’s good, because we start filming on Monday for our show.”
“Josh,” I whine. He knows how I feel about filming another reality show.
“Babe, listen. Barry is paying for everything. We’re going to Hawaii, all of us; your whole family, and I even included Bronx and Rebekah. You don’t have to do anything except tell people what you want. And your mom will be here at the end of next week to help you.”
“Really?”
He nods and plasters the sweetest grin on his face. “Yep, and I called the designer of your dress, you have a meeting with them next week to get fitted for something new.”
“Josh,” I gasp, covering my mouth as I try to ward off the tears. “Seriously?”
“Joey, I only want to make you happy. I know being in front of the camera again isn’t something you want to do, but you’re getting your dream wedding and you won’t have to lift a finger. You get to bark orders at others and snap your fingers when you want something done.”
“That’s not really me though.”
“I know, but for a few weeks it can be and you can do it with a smile.”
Taking his hand in mine, I attempt to tug him off the couch. “Come on.” I motion with my head toward our room.
“Nah, get back here,” he says, pulling me back onto his lap. “I haven’t been with you for three days, Joey, and that is far too long. Tonight, I’m going to make love to you under the stars.”
“Outside?” I ask, unsure how I feel about this.
“Right here on this couch.”
“What if someone sees us?”
Josh looks around and smirks. We have trees that block the backyard from prying eyes and an electric fence that runs along our privacy fence. Logistically the only way they’d see us if they climb on to their roof and still then our roof gets in the way.
“You know it’s safe.”
I nod, biting my lower lip. “I do.”
Closing his eyes, he leans his forehead against mine. “I can’t wait to hear you say that again. Only seven weeks from now and those sweet words will come from your lips once again, but this time you’ll be looking into my eyes when you say it.”
“And your soul.”
Josh kisses me, slowly, testing the waters so to speak. But it’s not enough for me. He may think he’s the only one addicted in our relationship, but he’s sorely mistaken.
Knocking on my former apartment door seems odd, but the last thing I want to do is barge in if Rob’s busy. I’m going to ask him to be my best man, but his answer will depend on his response to my questions about Jules. I still clearly remember the day Joey and I walked in and Jules was sitting too close for comfort to my best friend. They’ve been friends for a long time, but since that day something hasn’t sat very well with me.
“Why are you knocking?” Rob asks, standing there in nothing but a pair of shorts. His hair is wet and there’s a towel resting on his shoulders. I glance over the wrought iron railing and look down at the pool. It’s full of girls, who all wave up when they see me.
“Not my place anymore. I don’t want to interrupt anything.” Stepping in, I close the door behind me. I wish I could say the place has changed, but nothing has. I think if Rob had moved out I’d rearrange or buy something new.
“You’re always welcome.”
“Unless you’re getting laid. I don’t want to walk in on that shit.”
Rob laughs and offers me something to drink. “Something mellow. I’m driving.” He returns and hands me a bottle of water, while he kicks back with a beer. I do miss hanging out with him and need to make sure our friendship doesn’t suffer because I’m married and changing my path. He’s still my best friend and I don’t want to lose sight of that.
“How’s married life? Is it worth it?”
“Is it worth what?”
“Giving up the unlimited amount of free pussy?”
I try to laugh it off, but that’s who Rob is. He uses his status as an aspiring and upcoming actor to get laid. He scores more when h
e’s with me, though, because he’s not afraid to mention who his best friend is.
“Definitely, as long as it’s Joey.”
“And Jules?”
Fiddling with the label on my water, I meet his gaze. “That’s why I’m here. What’s going on with you guys?”
He looks at me and shakes his head. “Nothing, man. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“She’s not mine.”
“And I’m not hers.”
“The day Joey and I bought the house, she was here. It looked like she was sitting close to you. It makes me wonder. She’s a beautiful woman, so I wouldn’t blame you.”
“Except she’s hung up on you and pregnant. Besides, that day you showed up, she had been waiting here for hours. Every single day she was coming over to see if you were here. Jules was crying and thought my shoulder was the place to seek solace. I didn’t touch her. Never have and never will.” Rob heads back to the kitchen and returns with another beer. “How’s Joey taking that anyway?”
Twisting the cap on my bottle, I down about half the contents before setting it down on my knee. “Jules is hung on anyone who wants to give her attention. As far as Joey and the Jules situation it’s complicated, but Joey’s a strong woman and knows that I love her.”
“I think the best decision you ever made was staying with Joey. She seems nice. I’d like to get to know her.” Any doubt I had about Rob being interested in Jules, or hooking up with her is long forgotten. He’s my best friend and they don’t do that shit to friends. He knows I’d never do that to him.
“Well that’s why I’m here. In six weeks we’re getting married, or renewing our vows, and I’d like to know if you’d be my best man?”
“Hell yeah,” he says, standing. I do the same and we hug. “Are you pissed she wants a wedding?”
“It’s not her, it’s me, man. I’m so in love with her that I want to watch her walk down the aisle. I want to see her face when she says her vows to me. The first time was a joke.” I shrug. “I mean, we’re married, but her ring was tiny and there was no emotion in our vows. I want the real thing.”
“Dude, you’re pussy whipped.”
We both sit back down and I start laughing. “You know it, and I’ll fucking admit it. She’s the best damn thing that has ever happened to me.”
“What do your parents think of her?”
I glance at him and shake my head. “I don’t even know if they know I’m married. Neither of them has called for money lately, and I really have no reason to call them. I should, though. Maybe we’ll video chat with them later.”
“Better warn them first because I’m sure they’ll have a few negative things to say.”
He’s right, and that is the main reason I haven’t told them. Their lives are screwed up. I have no doubt my mom will see her money tree slipping away, and that will be Joey’s fault, and knowing my father he’d probably try to hit on her with me sitting right next to her. Hell, they don’t even know about the possibility of me becoming a father. Not that it would matter—they’ll never have anything to do with any of my children.
“You should come over for dinner,” I offer to Rob. “Come see the house, go for a swim.”
Laughing, he pulls at his shorts. “Yeah, I think I’ll do that.”
I finish the rest of my water and take my empty bottle into the kitchen. “I gotta run. I have to pick up Joey and we’re meeting with my lawyer about Jules.”
“What’d she do?”
“Court ordered paternity test. I wasn’t going to push the issue because she said it wasn’t safe for the baby, but she somehow broke in and planted a bunch of pictures and shit, and destroyed Joey’s wedding dress. I’m done with her, man.”
“See what I’m talking about,” he replies, standing. “Love makes you crazy.”
I don’t want to call what Jules has done love. You don’t hurt the people you love. I get that she feels scorned and that’s my fault for giving her false hope. When we broke up I should’ve stopped sleeping with her, answering her calls, and hanging out with her. I led her on and that has proven to come back and bite me in the ass.
“Are you nervous?” Joey asks, leaning her head on my shoulder. We’re in the office of our new lawyer, waiting to find out if Jules’ baby is mine. If it’s mine, I’ll deal, but I’m praying that it isn’t. Not because I don’t want to be a dad, but because I want Joey to be the one who gives me my first child and I really want Jules to be out of our lives once and for all. I know I created the way she is by my actions and if I could change it I would, but I can’t. I made stupid choices and I’m hoping they stop coming back to bite me in the ass.
“Yes and no.”
“Why the no?”
“Because of what Bronx told me. He’s pretty sure that I’m not the father and even questioned if she’s truly pregnant.”
“I’ve said the same thing.” Her fingers dance along my arm, roaming up and down. Her touch is soothing and something I crave daily. Joey is like my own personal source of oxygen. I don’t know how I ever considered myself to be living before I met her.
“I know, but she’s big.”
“And never touches her belly. When skin stretches it hurts, and when she was at our house she never asked you to feel the baby moving. I found that odd.”
“And that is something I didn’t even notice.”
We’re not the only ones waiting in the office. I’m trying to avoid looking around the room, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone, but it’s too late. As soon as I glance to my right there’s a woman staring and checking her phone. When she starts to stand, I sit up, causing Joey to move her head.
“Are you Josh Wilson?”
When they ask like that I’ve been tempted to say no, to see what they’d say, but I don’t want to be rude.
“I am.”
“Oh my God. I can’t believe this. Here I am waiting to file for divorce and you’re sitting right here. You’re my favorite actor.”
Joey snickers beside me and I give her a knowing look.
“Thank you.”
“And you’re Joey?”
Now it’s me laughing. She’s always joked that no one will ever recognize her so she doesn’t need a disguise when she goes out. Not that I have one on aside from a baseball hat.
“I am,” she replies, beaming. I’m smiling too because I believe this is her first fan encounter and it’s a positive one.
“Can I get a photo with the both of you?”
“Absolutely,” I say, speaking for Joey as well. “Excuse me, can you take our photo?” I ask the man sitting across from us. He seems bothered by my question, but stands anyway. The fan hands him her phone.
I stand and her arm comes around me instantly. I try to put a little separation between us, but she moves closer, clearly needing to be inside my bubble.
“What side do you want me on?” Joey asks. The fan holds her other arm out, showing Joey where she wants her.
We stand for a few seconds smiling until the man hands her the phone back.
“Wow, thank you so much.” She starts to walk away and as we’re sitting back down she turns. “Wait, you guys aren’t getting a divorce, are you?”
“No, just signing some paperwork.”
“Oh phew. You guys were my favorite couple on Married Blind.”
“Thanks. And hey, if you’re interested, we start filming a new show next week. It’ll be live for the most part as we get ready to renew our vows.”
“I’ll be front row and center,” she exclaims, sitting back down. Her attention is solely on her phone now.
“She’s happy,” Joey says, leaning into me again.
“Even though she’s here to get a divorce, we made her day.”
Within seconds both our phones go off with notifications. We laugh as we check and find that she’s posted our picture on Instagram.
“I’m commenting,” Joey says, much to my surprise. I’m smiling when her comment on how excited she was to meet
the woman today shows up, and a quick glance across the room tells me that Joey has made her day even brighter.
“That was nice of you.” I kiss her on her forehead instead of the lips. As much as I want to do the latter I don’t want that picture out there.
Joey shrugs. “She wanted me in her photo, it’s the least I could do.”
“Mr. and Mrs. Wilson, if you’ll follow me.”
Joey and I wave at our fan and head through the door, following our attorney’s secretary. She shows us into his office where we take a seat, joining hands immediately. Regardless of the outcome, we’re in this together. And if the baby is mine, we’re filing for custody and asking the judge to take into consideration Jules’ mental state and her actions inside our home.
“I bet you’re anxious.” Dan Woodstock came highly recommended by Blaze, making my decision to sign with him easy. Since then, Joey and I have changed all of my necessary paperwork and added her name. Before, my estate—for it’s worth—was going to my parents and the community center. Now everything will go to Joey. The community center will still benefit, but it will be at her discretion in the event she’s supporting our children. I’m planning ahead, even if she isn’t yet.
Dan opens the large manila envelope, causing my heart to start racing. I’ve never been more nervous than I am now. Even when I married Joey my body didn’t shake with anticipation like this.
“I feel like I should be on the Maury Povich show,” I blurt out, squeezing Joey’s hand. Both she and Dan laugh, but I don’t find it funny. My life hangs in the balance of what that piece of paper says.
“The alleged father, Joshua Wilson, can be excluded as the biological father of the fetus here by referred to as Baby Maxwell.”
“Holy shit, she is pregnant,” Joey says.
“I’m sorry, what?” I ask, swallowing hard. I don’t think I heard him correctly.
“You’re not the father, Josh,” Joey says with tears in her eyes.
“I’m not?”
She shakes her head, biting her lower lip. “You’re not.”
I sit back in the chair, letting the words sink in.
“Holy shit.”
Twisted Reality (Blind Reality #2) Page 15
