I want him to leave. In all actuality, I need him to.
The longer that he stays increases the chances that I’m going to end up back in bed with him. I lost count on how many times our bodies ended up intertwined overnight. Five, ten, twenty, who fucking knows?
All that I know is what just happened in my bedroom can never happen again. Wyatt’s not just good in bed, he’s magnificent. He’s patient, attentive, in control, and sexy as hell. Hands down, the best sex that I’ve ever had, in my entire life.
It’s the kind that can really mess with a woman’s head. Make her feel like something is there when really it isn’t. Wyatt stared down, into my eyes like he adored every inch of me. It’s not reality. He’s just an incredible lover, and before I get any deeper into this, I’ve got to cut my losses.
“So,” I nibble on my lower lip, not so nonchalantly glancing up at the clock. “It’s nine. Your sister is probably wondering where you are.”
“She might be.” He shrugs, missing yet another signal. “But the only thing that she’s going to do is chew me a new asshole. She’s pretty pissed off that I dipped out on the party last night.”
The scratches on his face look better this morning. Last night they were pretty red and angry, but today they’re barely visible. Not that I’m paying much attention to them. It’s hard to notice anything when his delicious chest is on display.
He leans against my kitchen counter as if he owns the place, looking all leisurely and crap. Inwardly, I sigh.
This is why I don’t do this. I don’t have the heart to just kick him out; I want him to leave on his own. The only problem is that Wyatt is not picking up on the fact that I need some space right now. It’s precisely why I shouldn’t have spread my legs for him in the first place.
“So, I should probably get going.” I lean back on my heels. “I need to make sure the cleaners showed up. The keys to the ballroom need to be returned by noon.”
“No need.” He pours himself more fucking coffee. It’s as if he knows that he’s torturing me right now. “You’re still fired, so you don’t need to do it. My agent is heading there right now. He just dropped your car off, by the way.”
I glance out of the window, seeing that sure enough, my car is parked out front.
“But I’m the party planner.”
“Not anymore you’re not. You’re sleeping with me now. You can’t be working for me. It’d ruin your reputation.” The corners of his lips turn up, his signature sexy as sin smirk in place.
“Slept with you, as in past tense. It’s not going to happen again.”
He drains his mug in one gulp, rinses it out in the sink, and then moves towards me. My heart races in my chest, as his bare skin brushes against mine. Heat races through me, causing my breath to catch. His lips brush across mine, and his hands grab onto my ass, smacking me hard.
“Oh, Princess. It’s going to happen again. You better get that through your pretty little head.”
He’s gone before I even have the chance to respond.
23
Wyatt
“I’m still mad at you.” Willow plops down on the end of my bed. “So, don’t think that me sitting here means that I’m ready to forgive you just yet.” She may not forgive now, but she’s close. Her rebound time I’ve learned, is pretty fast.
This is the first time that she’s talked to me all day. When I walked in the house this morning, she took one look at the scratches on my neck and rolled her eyes, disgust evident on her face. She obviously thinks that I left the party last night to get laid. While that’s the way that it turned out, had my mother not gotten trashed and acted like a fool, I guarantee that none of what followed would have happened.
I suppose that I owe our mother a thank you. Her mess turned into my lucky night.
After adding the clothes in my hand to my suitcase, I shove it out of the way and plop down onto my bed next to my sister. “I’m sorry that I left you sis, but something came up and I had no choice. You should definitely forgive me, though. I leave in two days,” I lean into her, nudging her gently with my shoulder. “If you don’t, you’ll be riddled with guilt for the next month.”
“Guilt trip, much?” She rolls her eyes, but the anger that was present just a second ago fades, and the makings of a smile start. “But you’re right. I would feel bad. Is it weird that you aren’t even gone yet, and I already miss you?’
As tears fill her eyes, my heart cracks in my chest. I’m not one to get lost in my feelings easily, but when it comes to my sister, seeing her sad fucking guts me.
“Willow…”
“I know. It’s ridiculous.” A single tear escapes her eyes, traveling down her cheek. The second that I wipe it away, the dam breaks loose. As tears flood her face, I pull her into me. She sobs into my chest, my shirt gripped into her hand. All that I can do is wrap my arms tighter around her and let her cry. I have no idea how long we sit like this, me petting her hair and trying to soothe her, but it’s no use.
She’s hysterical.
“Willow.” Finally, I pull back from her, tipping her face up to mine, forcing her to look at me. “What in the hell is going on with you? What’s the matter?”
I can count on one hand all of the times that I’ve seen my sister cry. She bottles up her emotions, and then usually releases them in a fit of rage that could easily give the Hulk a run for his money. She’s normally calm and collected until she flips shit. So obviously, her sobbing hysterically has the hairs on my neck standing at attention. Somethings very fucking wrong.
“I don’t know. It’s just, everything’s changing.” Another wail leaves her, causing me to wrap her back into my arms. She continues to sob against my chest, her tears soaking into my shirt.
“I mean, think about it. Two more nights. That’s it. The second you board that flight for Florida, we no longer live together. By the time you come home, I’ll be married and moved out. Life as we know it is about to be over, and I don’t know if I’m ready for that.” She sniffles. “You’re not ready either, and you know it. I know I keep saying it, but I’m worried about you. I just have this terrible feeling in my stomach that you’re not going to be ok, and it’s making all of this worse.”
“Willow.” I can’t stop myself from chuckling. “You’re crying over me? Honestly, I’m flattered, but I think you’re going a bit overboard. I’m going to be fine.”
She pulls back on her own, hastily wiping the remaining tears off of her cheek with the back of her hand. When her eyes meet mine, she looks less than convinced.
“It’s not just that, it’s all of the change. I mean, I’m marrying BJ.” Her eyes travel down to her hands, where she anxiously tugs at the rock sitting there. “Am I even doing the right thing?”
“Whoa.” I grab her chin in my hand and force her to look at me. As I stare into her eyes, I see the uncertainty there, staring back at me, plain as damn day. I suppose I’ve never questioned her on why she was getting married, I just assumed that she was rushing through her engagement because she couldn’t wait any longer to marry this guy. The look in her eyes says something else completely.
“Are you pregnant?”
“What?” She blinks up at me, her eyebrows skyrocketing. “Why would you ask that?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” my eyes roll, “because for one, you’re hysterical, and you never get like this. You just get crazy angry. Also, you’re rushing to get married and I never really stopped to ask you why. So?” I point to her stomach. “Is there a little nephew in there?”
She smacks my arm and shakes her head, some of the fog lifting from her eyes.
“Good God, Wyatt. No. I’m not pregnant. We were rushing the wedding because of our residencies.”
“Well, then maybe you should consider postponing it, sis. You’re obviously having second thoughts.”
My words sit like a lead weight between us. She stares down at her hands, I continue to stare at her, trying hard to read between the lines of what she’s telling m
e, and all that she’s holding back. I can see the internal struggle that she’s dealing with, but even though we’re close and I consider her my very best friend, I can tell that she isn’t going to give me any further details about the reason she’s developed cold feet.
“Look.” I nudge her again. “I know I’m not the guy who should be dishing out relationship advice or anything, but hear me out, alright?”
When she looks up at me, I see the hope in her eyes. The glimmer, hidden behind the sadness, hoping that I’m going to give her the secret to life or something. I don’t have relationship experience, so I certainly don’t have much advice to offer.
But I have cared about someone before. Most people who have met me would argue this and say that I only care about myself. While I have put myself first many, many times in the past, that doesn’t mean that I’ve never started to fall for someone. It also doesn’t mean that I’ve never been blindsided by that feeling, time and time again. It’s my turn to stare down at my hands, as I try to spin what I know into advice that might help my sister. When the words don’t come, I just shrug my shoulders and shake my head.
“Change is fucking scary, Willow. But it’s the only thing that you can count on in life. BJ loves you; I have no doubt about that, otherwise I’d never let him marry you.” Her soft laughter relaxes me. “But marriage is forever, and if you aren’t sure that this is what you want, then I really think that you should hold off. Push your wedding date back a bit. Take some time to make sure that you’re making the right choice. But don’t let this decision be because of me. I’m going to be just fine, sis. I promise you.”
“You’re going to go crazy.” She stares back at me, her head shaking slightly. “You’re going to make bad decisions, because I won’t be here every day to keep you in line. Don’t tell me not to worry about you, Wyatt, because I worry about you all of the time anyway. I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
I inhale sharply and hold her gaze.
“Would it make you feel better if I told you that I met someone?”
Her entire face changes. She goes from shocked, to confusion, and right to calling my bullshit within a matter of seconds.
“You’re such a liar,” she snorts. “You’re just trying to put my mind at ease.”
I honestly wish that I was. It would be a lot easier to make it up in my head than to be actually dealing with the emotions that I am right now. My heads fucked up over what happened with Gia last night, and no matter how many times I’ve tried to push thoughts of her out of my head, the visions of the way her face looked as I slid inside of her have been haunting me all day. Never in my life have I wanted a moment to last forever, yet there I was last night, praying to God to stop time and let me live right there inside of her for the rest of my days. The way that she tasted, the way that she smelled, the way her soft skin felt against mine was nothing short of intoxicating.
Now I know why Adam ate the damn apple. Why he chose to indulge in the sweetest sin. Gia’s always been someone who should have been off limits for me, but as it turns out, nine years was my limit on holding out from her. And now that I’ve had her, staying away is going to be impossible.
“I wish that I was,” I shrug, not willing to divulge much more information than this. “But I got blindsided. It’s changing the way that I see my future.”
“Wait.” Her hand pauses on my arm, and her eyes fly up to mine, widening in shock. “It’s Gia, isn’t it?”
“What?” I blink at her. How in the fuck did she manage to link all of what I just said to Gia? She should seriously consider giving up medicine and becoming a detective. Her sixth sense is incredible.
“No,” I scoff, but it’s too late. Willow’s always been able to see through my lies, and this time proves to be no different. The sadness leaves her instantly, surprise taking over her features. She blinks at me a few times and then finally shakes her head.
“Declan told me last night that you left with Gia. I just assumed that you had stepped out in the hall with her, so she could chew you a new asshole for firing her at my party.” I stare down at my hands while she glares at me for that dick move. “But you fired her on purpose, didn’t you?”
I swallow.
“You fired her so that you could hook up with her, without ruining her reputation.”
I’d love to say that I was considering her reputation when I did in fact fire her, but that would be taking credit for something that I hadn’t thought of. Basically, I fired her for my own selfish need.
“Something like that,” I sigh. “Turns out, I still have feelings for her.” If I ever let myself believe that I was over Gia, last night proved otherwise. All of a sudden, my fight left me, and I was right back in that place with her. Picking up like the last nine years didn’t happen. The same anxious need to have her took over me, only this time, I was in no position to walk away. Not that I ever would.
Shits different now. I’m older, a hell of a lot wiser. And if forced to make a choice right now, between football and her? It wouldn’t even be a competition.
“What kind of feelings are you talking about?” Willow’s skeptical, and she has every right to be. Hell, the sudden change in me is even making me question shit. “You lust for her? You like her? You love her?” I can tell by the tone of her voice that she believes it to one of the first two. I want to answer her-honestly, I do.
But first, I’ve got to figure it out for myself.
“Fuck, Wyatt.” My sister’s demeanor changes, her sadness leaving her almost immediately, and irritation taking over. Like I said, she has one hell of a fast rebound rate.
“I wish that I could say this eases my fears about leaving you on your own, but now it just adds another element to it. I told you not to mess around with her, and you went ahead and did it anyway. I can’t say that I’m pleased about it.”
“You’re my sister.” My lips flatten. “Shouldn’t you be on my side?”
“I’m always on your side,” her eyes roll. “But I also know you. And I don’t think that you’re considering the entire situation that you’re getting into.”
I give her a look asking her to elaborate. When she does, she doesn’t hold back.
“You’re my brother, and I love you, but Gia isn’t like the other women you date. She’s been dealt a shitty deck and has been blasted all over social media for it. She’s been slut shamed, been called names that are too awful to even repeat, and has gone through a hellacious divorce coupled with a custody battle. She does not need you adding to her list of issues, and of even more importance, she’s a mother, and a good fucking one at that. Pursuing Gia means that you’re pursing Delilah, too. You have the potential to break not only Gia’s heart, but also Delilah’s. You need to remember that. If you aren’t sure that what you’re feeling is love, then I beg you. Just leave her alone.”
Her words sting. I’d be lying if I said that they didn’t. I know that I haven’t always had the best of intentions, but where Gia’s concerned, I’ve always put her needs first. That’s why, back then, I didn’t sleep with her. That’s why I didn’t have sex with her, even though walking away from her caused me to nearly spontaneously combust.
Never in my life have I wanted a woman so badly, and the fact that at eighteen, at the peak of my horniest stage, I managed to keep it in my pants and do what was best for her has to count for something. Maybe I still shouldn’t have slept with her last night, but for fucks sake. A man can only say no for so long.
“Listen, I have no intention of hurting Gia,” I tell Willow honestly. I glance down at my phone, for the umpteenth time today, seeing that my texts and my calls have still gone unanswered. “In fact, I’m not even sure if she’s ever going to call me back.”
“Wait a second,” the darkness in my sister’s eyes fades, as she stares up at me, a small smirk tugging at the corners of her lips. “She’s not calling you back?”
I narrow my eyes at her, to which she finally laughs.
“Of co
urse, she’s not,” her chest shakes with laughter. “I don’t know why I’m so worried about her getting hurt. She seems quite capable of protecting herself.”
“You’re acting like I’m some complete jackass.” I glare at my sister, who just stares back at me. The look on her face tells me that yes, in fact, I am exactly that.
“Wyatt, I love you. You are the best big brother, and I appreciate everything that you do for me. I mean that.” I know that she does, but that’s not where this conversation is going. “But, when it comes to women, you have a shitty track record. You treat them like party favors, like a toy meant simply for your pleasure.” I open my mouth to interject that I in fact, have never led a woman on and have always made my intentions clear, when she holds up her hand. “Let me finish before you interrupt.”
Silence fills the air between us.
“Gia isn’t like that. She is a good person, an excellent mother, and she deserves to be with someone who recognizes that and is going to treat her accordingly. I want you to make sure that you know exactly how you feel about her before you try to bulldoze her.”
When I scoff, she rolls her eyes.
“Stop acting like you weren’t going to do exactly that,” her arms fold across her chest. “She’s ignoring you, and it’s wounding your ego. Make sure that it’s love you’re feeling and not lust before you pester that woman until she finally opens up her heart to you. Because if it’s not, and she lets you in, you’re going to crush not only her, but that little girl, too.”
24
Gia
“Please just stop talking about it.” I narrow my eyes at Serena, who is listening about as well as a toddler. She continues to smirk at me, her eyes traveling from the place that still aches from my encounter with Wyatt last night and back up to my eyes.
Hard Pass (Saints of Love Book 3) Page 14
