by Terri Grace
“That is the worst thing you could have ever done to me, Mama. It’s not right, nor is it fair.”
“Fair! Don’t you dare mention that word to me, Gerald Emmanuel Harper. Is it fair for all my peers to be holding grandchildren while I look on with envy? Tell me, is it?”
“You didn’t have to choose a wife for me as if I am an imbecile.”
“You might as well be. Gerald, you’re too proud, and I only did what loving mothers the world over are doing. No matter how many women I tried to introduce you to, you always had something against them. Either the woman was too tall or too short, too thin or too fat, too clever or too foolish, too submissive or too aggressive.” She threw her hands up in the air. “I was at my wits’ end. Your pride will be your downfall one of these days.”
“I had no need for a wife, and now that you’re obviously not on your death bed, I see no further need of the woman you tricked me into marrying.”
“Don’t you ever refer to that lovely girl as ‘the woman.’” Her eyes blazed at him and he had the grace to blush. “Deborah has a name and she is a really lovely girl. If only you would take the time and get to know her. What’s so wrong with her?”
“Nothing is wrong with her. She is actually very pretty. The issue here is that I have no desire to have a wife or children anytime soon, so it’s up to you to see to Deborah’s affairs. I never asked you to trick me into marrying her. I merely acted out of desperation and yet you deceived me.”
“Well, you will treat your wife with the respect she deserves, or else you and I will have a problem for many years to come.”
Deborah had heard enough. Putting a hand over her mouth to cover a cry of dismay, she ran to the room that had been allocated to her when she arrived. So it was about to happen; she had expected it but it still hurt to know that Gerald was willing to toss her aside now that his mother was all right. She was glad that Grace Harper was not on her death, bed but she felt like she’d been used and it was not a pleasant feeling.
“Lord, please help me,” she sobbed into her pillow. Her “husband” of two days only was about to send her away, but she would save him the effort by leaving the very next day. She would not continue to live in a house where she wasn’t wanted. Thankfully, her job in Dover was still open and she would travel back and live out the rest of her days as a single woman. Never would she allow anyone to rip her heart to shreds again, like Gerald had done. At least he had one thing going for him – he hadn’t mentioned her physical features, not even once, and had actually said she was pretty. She had to be fair on him, and she decided that she would forgive him and move on.
Grace noticed that her daughter-in-law was very quiet during dinner and any effort to get her to open up were futile. Gerald ignored both women, and once he was done with dinner he announced that he was going out to lock up.
“My dear, you seem very sad,” said Grace. “What’s going on?”
Deborah decided to tell the truth. “I’m sorry, but I have to leave tomorrow. I overheard you and Gerald arguing. I’m sorry to be the one who’s caused tension between the two of you.”
Grace laughed shortly. “Believe me, child, Gerald and I have always been at loggerheads because of his stubbornness. My son is too proud and thick-headed for his own good. If anything, I should be apologizing for dragging you into this mess. But please stay for a while.”
Deborah shook her head. “I know you somehow believe that my presence here will make your son change his mind. It won’t. I’ve worked for Mrs Prune at the bridal agency for about four years now, and I know for a fact that when a man rejects a woman, only a miracle can make him accept her. It’s better that I leave now before I become bitter towards your son.”
Try as she might, Grace failed to convince Deborah to stay on, and in the end she reluctantly agreed to organize for a coach to take her to the train station the next day.
Deborah was up early, for she intended to be gone as soon as possible. Though she wasn’t sure of getting a train immediately, she decided that even if no train passed by Winnemucca station today, she would spend the night at an inn. One more moment in this house would just about kill her.
Grace was not yet up and she had no idea who to ask for transportation to the train station, so she was forced to wait. Her hostess emerged from her room almost two hours later and Deborah was surprised to see that her eyes were red-rimmed, as if she’d been crying. Much as she wanted to ask what the matter was, she didn’t want to get involved in the affairs of this family anymore. The sooner she left, the better for them all. Of Gerald there was no sign.
“Have you had any breakfast?”
“Yes, ma’am. Marie served me. I was just waiting for you to wake up so I could bid you farewell, and ask about the coach that will be dropping me at the train station.”
“Do you have enough for the train fare?”
“Yes, ma’am. Mrs Prune was anticipating something like this and gave me enough money to cover all my expenses.”
There was a commotion outside and Grace hurried to the window to check. The sight that met her eyes caused her to swoon and Deborah was just in time to catch her before she fell and hit her head on the floor.
How could his mother have deceived him like that, and how could he have been such a fool to be taken in by her act? He realized now that the signs had all been there, but he was too caught up in his emotions to read them clearly. He was sure Hannah Morgan and Dr Albert Mannington were in on the deceit and he fumed as he rode out to the range.
His herd was grazing peacefully in the valley below and he had to check on it. They were getting ready to cull the herd and prepare the next shipment for New York. The buyer had sent a telegram telling him that he’d already given instructions to his bank to make payment once the herd was loaded and arrived safely.
As he was riding Chester, lost in his own world, he became aware of a hissing sound and realized too late that he had left his rifle at home. Rattlesnakes and horses were arch enemies and when the serpent raised its head, Chester got spooked, stumbled and unseated Gerald. The last thing Gerald felt was sharp pain as his head and back connected with the rocky ground.
Dr Albert pronounced Gerald to be paralyzed from the waist downwards and his mother wept at the implications. If only he had accepted Deborah as his wife, she might have had hope of having a grandchild one day. Now she would never hold any of Gerald’s children.
Deborah was fighting emotions of her own. Grace Harper seemed to have aged a hundred years since her son was brought in unconscious and covered in blood. Chester’s arrival at the ranch had alerted the cowhands to trouble, since they had seen Gerald riding out earlier, and when three of them went in search of their boss, they found him lying unconscious on one of the ridges.
“Please, Deborah,” Grace pleaded with tears in her eyes. “Don’t leave today. At least stay until I’m strong enough to take care of my son.”
Deborah nodded. She was hurting, but that was no reason not to show some kindness to her hostess, who had been good to her over the last few days. Besides that, the woman looked devastated, especially when she found out that Gerald was paralyzed. To add to the trauma, Marie’s daughter went into labor and she had to leave.
For three days Gerald was in and out of consciousness and he didn’t seem to recognize anyone, not even his mother. Grace recovered slightly, and one day she came in to observe as Deborah was cleaning her husband. She stayed for a very short time, and when Deborah exited the room, she found her standing in the hallway as if she’d been waiting for her.
“Deborah, you’re a wonderful girl and I’m sorry you were brought here under false pretenses. I know you think I’m well enough to take care of the ranch and my son, but I’m not.” She shook her head. “Just thinking that my son might have died is terrifying. In a way, I believe this is an answer to my prayers. The miracle I was praying for.”
Deborah frowned. “Miracle? What do you mean?”
“That night when you told me you would be leavi
ng, I didn’t sleep at all but spent it on my knees, pleading for a miracle. I could never have known that it would happen in this way.” She sniffed. “I prayed that the Lord would humble my very proud and arrogant son, but never did I expect that this was the answer that I would get. Watching you do everything for him is humbling, and I know that when he recovers his memory he’ll feel so humbled. Gerald never lets his guard down. I don’t know where he got the idea that he has to always be a tough man. Maybe it was because he realized quite early in his life that he was the man of the home and had to take care of me. Please don’t entertain any thoughts of leaving, Deborah. Please.”
The Harper Spread was a wonderful place. When they weren’t looking after Gerald and seeing to his needs, Deborah and Grace would ride out to check on the animals. That was when she found out just what a tough woman her mother-in-law was. Grace was fair to their employees, but she expected the best of them, reminding Deborah of Salome Prune.
Slowly, Deborah began getting the hang of things and Gerald’s men began respecting her. She was up by the first cock crow and went to bed late, never complaining about the amount of work that needed to be done on the ranch. She fed ten men, cleaned the house, and took care of her sick husband, giving Grace time to ride out to the range every day to check on the animals there.
Deborah loved the fresh air, and the mountains brought to light the majesty of the Creator. Sometimes she sensed Gerald’s moods and knew he hated being confined, but there was nothing he could do about it. So she took to describing to him all that she had done during the day, and even though he never answered, she was glad to note that his eyes lighted up whenever she entered the room. Being a pretend wife was wonderful but Deborah lived in fear of her husband regaining his memory, for once he realized who she was, he would most definitely send her back to Dover as he had originally intended.
Then she felt that she was being very selfish, not wanting her husband to recover his full senses, and began to pray for his recovery.
One afternoon, she returned to find that he was awake and as soon as he saw her, his eyes lit up.
“I’m sorry that I left you alone for so long. I asked Mama to feed you because I had to watch Daisy May as she calved. She’s a skittish one and since it’s her first calf I think she was just scared.” Deborah pulled up a chair. “The calf is beautiful. Wait until you see her, Gerry. I don’t know if you remember which one Daisy May is, but hopefully you’ll soon walk again and recover your memory; then you can see them again.”
Deborah went on and on describing her day, but what she wasn’t aware of was the fact that her husband had already regained his memory. He had actually regained it two days ago and watched as Deborah worked and ran around, taking care of him. His mother was also unaware as she had extolled his wife’s virtues to him.
He noticed that Deborah seemed to have lost a bit of weight. No doubt the hard work on the ranch was taking its toll, but she never complained, nor did she ever seem strained at all. If anything, the fresh air had put a rosiness in her cheeks that he found really appealing. According to his mother, Deborah hardly ever slept because she worried about him.
Gerald felt something within him that he couldn’t explain. Watching the woman he had rejected as she took care of all his needs was really humbling and he began to realize how lucky he had been. Many men never recovered from such accidents and it made him understand that life was very short. More especially he’d realized how helpless he was without the Lord. His mother had brought him up in church, but somewhere along the line he had thought of himself as being too big to need anyone, least of all the Lord, and had turned his back on the church.
He needed to change. That much he realized, and the next time his mother came to relieve Deborah, he asked her to send for Pastor Matthew.
“My life is worth nothing,” Gerald said, and for the first time in a very long time, he allowed his tears to flow. “I turned my back on God and thought I was strong enough to do everything on my own. My mama has been pleading with me to be serious about my faith but I ignored her. Now see what I am, an empty shell of a man.”
Matthew Perry’s heart went out to the younger man but he was also rejoicing at having one of his flock return to the fold. Grace had spent many hours on her knees in church, praying that her son would not completely give up on his faith and her prayers had been rewarded.
“I’ll probably never walk again and for the rest of my life. I’ll have to depend on others for my most basic needs.” Gerald shook his head. “This is actually what I deserve, and I feel that God has been very patient and gracious with me. I should be dead, given the kind of accident I had, but He chose to spare my life. Maybe there is hope for me still.”
“Son, our Lord is still in the business of receiving back those who have strayed from him. You were such a good young man and your mother never lost hope that you would one day return to the Lord. If there is anyone who is celebrating, it’s your mother and, of course, your lovely wife. She works so hard that your mother is even worried that she might make herself ill because she wasn’t brought up on a ranch and may be overstraining herself.”
Gerald bowed his head and wept, feeling ashamed about how he had treated Deborah – practically ignoring her; only concerned about his needs. “I have wronged my wife,” he wept. “Will Deborah ever forgive me for the way I treated her with such disrespect? From the moment I picked her up from the train station, I treated her like someone of no consequence. I was only interested in ensuring that I made my mother happy on her death bed. Then I discovered that Mama had done all that to trick me into marriage.” Gerald sobbed. “I was angry at having been deceived and wanted to send Deborah away, without considering her feelings or needs at all. Pastor Matthew, what kind of a man have I become?”
“Being contrite is a good thing, Gerry. Your wife knows that you’re sorry, as does your mother, but you need to speak with them and let them know how you feel. What are you planning to do now that your memory’s back?”
“I will ask Deborah if she wants to be my wife for real, but not because she feels pity for me. That would be too much. Watching this young lady as she took care of me, just like a loving wife would do, has humbled me. How can I ever repay her?”
“By loving her, cherishing her and, most of all, letting her know how you feel.”
“Hannah, the Lord has answered my prayers.” Grace was laughing and crying at the same time. She had gone to visit her friend. “I never believed that my son would one day seek reconciliation with the Lord and I worried so much about him.”
“The good Book instructs us to train up our children in the way they should go and when they grow up they will never depart from the way, no matter how it seems at first. Our Lord is gracious. It was just a matter of time before Gerry returned to the fold.”
“And I believe a lot of it also has to do with Debbie. She’s the kind of daughter-in-law that any woman dreams of having – an answer to my prayers. Without considering how we had treated her, that girl has nursed my son back to health and he’s even recovered his memory. She never once complained about anything and even I am humbled. Had I been the one, I might have reacted in a very different way.”
Deborah entered Gerald’s room and her eyes almost popped out of their sockets. He was out of bed. She remained at the doorway, staring at him for a long while. He was struggling to walk; then he lost his footing and fell forward. She waited for him to rage and was surprised when he began chuckling. She stepped back onto the corridor so he wouldn’t feel self-conscious at the invasion of his privacy.
Gerald lay on the ground for a short while before he pulled himself back upright. There was feeling in his legs and he was determined that he would walk again. It was very important to him because he intended on walking down the aisle with his beautiful wife, on his own two feet. Besides that, he would carry her over the threshold of their home – but that was only if she accepted him.
For the first time in a long time, Gerald wa
s unsure of himself. Watching his lovely wife day after day made him fall deeper in love with her and he wanted to wipe the uncertainty out of her eyes.
His mother had told him that Deborah had overheard their argument the day before he had the accident, and she had decided that she was going to return to Delaware.
“Mama, no!” Gerald had reached out a hand to his mother. “Please don’t say that.”
“What reason does Debbie have to remain in this house, when she clearly heard you saying that she was someone you married out of desperation? You said you wanted her gone and that is what is going to happen once you recover fully. That girl deserves a man who loves her truly and wholly, not someone who merely tolerates her.”
“Mama, I love Debbie, so much that I can’t believe how I lived without her. What can I do so she knows that?”
“I hope it’s not just because you still need her to help you around.”
“Ma, I’m regaining the use of my legs. I started feeling tingling and have been exercising. I intend to be up on my feet again when I ask Deborah to be my wife for real. I also don’t want her to feel that I’m doing it just because I’m desperate.”
Though Deborah was happy that Gerry was regaining the use of his legs, it was a stark reminder of her limited time in Winnemucca. Once he got back on his feet again he would probably ask her to leave. Many times she’d imagined herself living out the rest of her days on the ranch, seeing their children running around while Grace Harper looked on with joy and deep fulfillment. But that was before she found out that her husband was slowly getting better.
Now it was just a matter of time. As the days went by, Deborah found herself getting sadder. How could she bear to leave this man that she now loved so deeply, and the land that had brought her such fulfillment? But it would have to be done, because she had to give Gerald room to eventually find the woman he would love and who would bear his children.
