• We’ve failed to show how much we care by focusing on how much we know.
• We make the conversation all about us and our own personal agenda.
TELL ME MORE ABOUT YOU
Let’s use dating as an example. When you went on the first date with your significant other, you spent hours talking to each other, and the time seemed to fly by as you listened intently to every word that was spoken. You asked questions about his or her family, education, work goals, religious beliefs, favorite songs, or greatest memories.
Imagine how different things might have been if instead you’d had a one-sided conversation that focused squarely on “all about me.” Or, what if you shared something painful and before explaining the entire story, your date cut you off and told you what a mistake you made and how the entire event could have been prevented in the first place.
Or better yet, what if he or she asked you to marry them on the first date!
Chances are you would never have led the conversation with any of those things during the relationship-building stage. However, this is exactly what happens in sales when we don’t ask the right questions, or when we fail to learn enough about our prospect before presenting a solution and asking for a commitment.
HOW DOES DATING RELATE TO SELLING?
Now let’s imagine that during an initial meeting with a prospect, they share painful details of the existing relationship with your competitor.
They share with you how they aren’t being serviced as promised and the product doesn’t perform as advertised. At this point, you have two choices: You can either tell them how great your service is and how your product will deliver (solve their problem now) OR you can decide to ask more questions about how their service needs aren’t being met and specifically, how the product fails in performance.
Just as with dating, the same principles apply when talking to a customer.
The more questions you ask the customer, the more you make it about them, and the more you listen to what they say, the higher the likelihood that they’ll share sensitive and critical information. Much like dating, you need to earn trust. Then it’s how you use the information that can make or break the relationship.
THE POWER OF A SELFLESS PROCESS
selfless ~ having or showing great concern for other people and little or no concern for yourself
One of my greatest joys is teaching people how to create a selfless process as it relates to sales. It doesn’t matter what you are selling; letting the prospect know exactly how the process works is invaluable and puts the focus on them. Let me give you a quick example. Suppose I was selling insurance to a business owner and I was granted an initial meeting. Most sales people will start the meeting by talking about their company and why they feel they can help. They will ask some general questions and build dialogue based on responses. However, the amount of information they can extract from the customer is only as good as the amount of trust they’ve built. The greater the trust, the greater the response. Talking about ourselves and our company doesn’t necessarily build earned. What happens if the customer doesn’t want to divulge critical information because they don’t know why you need it or how you are going to use it? In other words, what if they don’t feel confident giving you the information? What if their pride doesn’t allow them to admit they have problems?
This is where having a rock-solid selfless process pays huge dividends for both parties. Instead of starting a meeting out with “all about me”
statements, start with telling the customer about your process, why you do certain things, and how they can benefit. Make the conversation about them and how you help solve problems.
So then, let’s assume the small talk is over and you’re ready to move into fact finding. Instead of starting with “me” statements, try starting with something like, “Mr. Prospect, I’m not sure if you are like most of my customers, but they tell me one of the things they enjoy most about working with me is the process I go through. Is it ok if I share with you how my process works so you’ll have a better understanding of what to expect during our time together today?” At this point I always pause and wait for permission to continue. (GREAT!) Once the customer agrees, proceed.
“First, I’m going to ask you questions about your business so I have a crystal-clear understanding of your needs. Some questions I’ll ask might be personal in nature but I want you to know upfront that I’ll only ask for information to help me determine whether I can be of service to you. If at any time, you’d like to know why I need certain information or how I’m going to use it, please let me know and I’ll gladly explain.
Second, if I feel I might be able to help, I’ll explain more about myself and my company and how I’ve assisted other customers’.
Third, if you like what you hear, I’ll ask to review your existing insurance program to compare coverages based on the information you provided.
I’ll be looking for gaps in coverage or possibly over-insured areas within your limits.
Fourth, I’ll prepare a detailed proposal outlining the areas I feel I can help, and I’ll set a time to review the proposal directly with you.
Finally, if you feel I’ve brought value to your business, I’ll ask you to allow me to become your advisor. Does that sound fair?”
In a nutshell:
• Start with a trust building statement that’s focused on them.
• Ask for permission to continue.
• Tell them you have a process.
• Explain the process thoroughly, point by point, including why you might need sensitive information. This is a huge trust building statement.
• End by letting them know you will ask for their business.
HOW DOES A SELFLESS PROCESS BUILD TRUST?
Consider starting a selfless conversation using a process like I’ve described above. I’ve found that once I explain the process, customer responses to probing questions are much deeper and more valuable.
Why? Because trust is being built on a rock-solid foundation. We’ve demonstrated consistency. We’ve already explained our process. When we follow it, the customer already knows what to expect so there are no surprises. Trust is gained by doing what we said we were going to do.
Simple but effective!
How else do we build trust? Look at our process and pay attention to two statements:
• “I’m not sure if you are like most of my customers, but they tell me one of the things they enjoy about working with me is the process I go through.”
• “If I feel I might be able to help, I’ll explain more about me and my company and how I’ve helped similar customers.”
Let’s break the first sentence down and explain why this simple statement helps to build trust. The phrase, “I’m not sure if you are like most of my customers” does two things. First, it says you’re not making any assumptions about their unique situation. This is HUGE! Everyone wants to feel special and unique. This small statement helps accomplish exactly that. Second, it lets them know you have other customers.
Another small win.
The second statement is strong as well. The phrase, “If I feel I might be able to help” reinforces no assumptions are being made and their time won’t be wasted by talking about “me” if it isn’t necessary.
Some other helpful trust-building statements:
• I’m not sure if I can help (I’m not making any assumptions).
• I don’t know enough about your unique situation to know whether I can help, but I would welcome an opportunity to learn more (I need more information about you).
• My customers tell me the three biggest problems we solve are… (This statement has two benefits: The first is, it’s basically a customer testimonial. People believe what other people say, not necessarily what you say. The second is, if these issues exist for your prospect, this shows you to be the expert in your field.)
• Can I give you an example of how I’ve helped other companies solve similar issues? (T
his reinforces you’re an expert. You’ve seen similar problems before and have had positive outcomes.) Remember, the greater the trust, the more valuable the responses are from your customer. As you continue to build and show value, your customer will give you more ways in which you can help them.
SUMMARY
Living in an “all about me” era makes it difficult to effectively communicate. We’ve learned to put ourselves and our desires in front of the needs of others. This exists in both our personal and professional lives. We’ve become desensitized to talking about ourselves.
My goal with this chapter is to help you consider how you use language and whether it’s self-serving or selfless. Many people believe they are trying to help others, only to learn they are only trying to meet their own agenda. We must reinvent ourselves in how we communicate with others. If nothing else, write down what you say to customers and ask yourself, “Is this about them or is it about me?” Remember, it’s not what you say that counts, but rather what they hear!
Try dating your prospects. Get to know them on a deeper level. Court them, serve them, even if they aren’t your customer…yet. Building trust doesn’t happen by accident. Be intentional and make it all about them.
About Gary
Gary Kieper Jr. helps his clients achieve their sales and business goals by providing sales training, coaching, and customized customer-facing sales language. He created the Selfless Sales™ Process to help clients build deeper and more meaningful relationships through advanced communication skills with customers.
Gary is the founder of Kieper Sales Solutions and has spent the past 20+ years learning, teaching, and transforming the sales process.
In 2014, Gary’s blog was selected by Docurated, a company that offers the fastest and simplest way for sales and marketing teams to find and use content, as one of their top 50 “must read” blogs on consultative sel ing saying, “Gary Kieper believes all of the traditional sales strategies are necessary for business success. But, he also believes that driving sales rests on adding value to the relationship by educating and helping prospects understand their problems and showing them how you’ve helped solve those same problems for other clients. He has consultative sales at the core of his business philosophy and it shines through his blog posts as wel .”
In 2015, Gary became certified as an Exit Planning Advisor helping business owners eliminate risk while maximizing value as they prepare to transition out of their business. That same year, he was certified as a Family Business Advisor where he helps family-owned businesses transition from one generation to the next. Both certifications allow Gary to fully engage with clients on an array of issues that are not just sales related.
Gary, a national speaker, is a member of The National Association of Experts, Writers & Speakers and routinely speaks at national sales meetings.
You can connect with Gary at:
• [email protected]
• www.SelflessSales.com
• www.twitter.com/GaryKieper
• www.linkedin.com/in/garykieper/
CHAPTER 28
TEN STEPS TO REGAIN YOUR PERSONAL POWER
BY JANET MCKEE
What do you want for your life? Why haven’t you yet achieved your dreams? What has stopped you from reaching the level of success in life that you desire? There is no need to feel frustrated any longer. You do have the power over your own fate.
What I’m about to teach you, is exactly what you need to triumph over any obstacles and finally achieve your goals and aspirations and begin to improve your life, starting NOW!
I’m not immune to experiencing challenges and struggles. After achieving solid success early in my career at a Fortune 500 company where I was promoted faster than my peers, I made a bold move into sales. Thinking I was invincible after graduating at the top of my class in school and enjoying corporate success, I hadn’t yet experienced failure.
Soon, I found myself struggling to make my numbers and floundering to close deals. After incorporating stress-management techniques that I now teach, I focused on my goal. Within a short time, I achieved top sales in a multi-billion-dollar organization where I single-handedly sold over $20million in products and services in one year alone.
Several years later, again thinking I was invincible, I made a new leap into entrepreneurship. Soon, I found myself struggling. Why? How could I be so successful in the past but again be worrying about generating enough revenue to grow my business and pay the bills?
With the concerns of leaving the corporate world along with challenges developing in my marriage, I ended up with an autoimmune disorder.
Hitting rock bottom in all areas of my life - along with my doctors telling me that there was no hope to resolve my illness, I began to search for answers. After a few years, I resolved my health challenge and have been medication free for over 20 years, which the doctors had said was impossible. Becoming passionate about helping others, I attended a wellness school affiliated with Columbia University and have since helped countless clients resolve debilitating and even life-threatening illnesses. What I’ve witnessed, however, was that some people followed through with my advice and achieved their goals while others did not follow through. So, I wanted to understand why.
TURN OBSTACLES INTO OPPORTUNITIES
In researching the psychology behind goal achievement, I discovered powerful secrets to living a good life. The most exciting fact I learned is that people have greater control over their destiny than they might believe. I am passionate about helping others and have dedicated my life to guiding people to enjoy successful lives.
Through the years, each struggle I encountered taught me invaluable lessons that made me the successful professional I am today. Now the owner of three thriving businesses, a public speaker, an author, a High Performance™ consultant with perfect health and enjoying true happiness in my life, I realize I wouldn’t be where I am today without overcoming past challenges. How did I do it? What is the secret to a life of success and fulfillment? It comes down to one thing – managing our inner environment.
This transformation can begin with some simple questions: In what areas of your life have you overcome challenges in the past? What amazing lessons did you learn that have made you stronger and wiser and helped you accomplish more? Contemplate that and discover how the focus of your thinking helped you reach the next level of your life.
CHANGE YOUR MINDSET, CHANGE YOUR LIFE
People are living a nightmare when they believe their lives are a result of causes other than their own thoughts and actions. Much of what happens to you is largely a result of your thoughts, beliefs and feelings. To improve your life and become a new person, the basis of all your thoughts must change. Your thoughts begin to change when you start to cultivate new ideas. Like spring crocus in colorful bloom, new empowering ideas inevitably will blossom if you follow these ten important steps.
1) Desire and intend to change and succeed.
Are you willing to do what it takes to realize your dreams? What do you think and believe about yourself? Do you realize that this creates your reality? Do you know that you deserve to think amazing things about yourself? So many people don’t believe that they can or deserve to have a fantastic life. They see themselves as always struggling financially or always being overweight and unhealthy.
Or, they feel their life is “fine” and refuse to make it extraordinary.
I’ve taught thousands how to overcome limiting beliefs, how to change old harmful thought patterns, how to gain clarity, energy, confidence, motivation and influence; and how to take the critical steps to turn fear into something that provides benefits over inhibitions. To gain this life-changing insight, many consult with me privately, hire me to speak to their organizations, or gain online access to my multitude of courses and information that is available at www.sanaview.com. One of the most powerful concepts that will impact your ability to realize your dreams, however, is what I am about to teach you here.
In
my other teachings, you learn how to raise your energy level to improve your inner environment , so that it matches what you desire in your outer life. At my 52-acre historic landmark organic farm, SanaView Farms, my farm manager knows the importance of energy and how it impacts our plants. If I’m in a grumpy mood, he chases me out of the greenhouse – especially when seedlings are being started. He says positive moods are required when planting seeds or else it stunts their growth. What we are doing here in this chapter is planting the seeds of positive creation and watch them blossom into the amazing being that you are. As Robert Louis Stevenson said, “Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.”
Please don’t wait until some future goal is achieved to be happy.
How often have you heard people say, “Oh, I’ll be happy when I get the new job, the new relationship, the money, the car or the house?”
They strive and struggle with negative energy thinking that the more they stress out the sooner they will get there and get happy.
Get happy and uplift your inner environment first and your dreams will more easily flow to you. How do you do that?
The key here is to understand the power of your imagination and of intense visualization to create not only a mental image of what you want, but also to get the feeling as if it is already your reality.
From this, you will move mountains, because the energy that you feel on the inside is reflected in your life on the outside. Napolean Hill once said, “Imagination is the most marvelous, miraculous, inconceivably powerful force the world has ever known.”
2) Create a mental image of what you want.
If you are ill, you see yourself as ill. If you say, “I am healthy and strong”, the neural pathways in your brain begin to replicate this, you begin to identify with it, and soon your life reflects this. As Neville Goddard wrote, “If you will not imagine yourself as other than what you are, then you remain as you are.” If you think you are broke or struggling in your professional career, what will your life continue to reflect back to you? This impacts your social and intimate life, financial state, and spiritual life. If you say, “I am smart, I am loveable, I am financially secure,” and get the feeling as if you are, your entire life will show you that it’s true.
Ready, Set, Go! (Special Edition) Page 23
