She couldn’t rely on him to keep her safe. He wasn’t with her every hour of every day. She could only rely on herself. So she would have to let Tyler go if he insisted on her giving up the last way she was able to protect herself.
The thought made her already aching heart fragment into a million pieces. She sank down, her knees pressing against the end of the treadmill, and let the tears come. Tears for Justin. For Alana. For Tyler and what she’d lose because of her past. It was that last thought that pushed her over from just tears into wracking sobs.
~*~*~
Tyler ran a hand through his hair and sighed. Three days. It had been three days since he’d last seen Melanie. Every time he’d picked up his phone to call or text her, he’d been at a loss for words. And apparently she felt the same way as there had been nothing from her either.
It felt wrong to be so torn up about that when things with Justin and Alana were still so bad. Justin was out of control in the hospital. He’d torn stitches trying to get out of bed, insisting he needed to be part of the search for Alana. Even injured, the man was strong, and it had taken a nurse and two orderlies to get him back into bed and sedated so he couldn’t do more damage to himself.
Rumor had it that the only people who could keep him calm in the hospital were Caden, his sister, and Melanie. He’d tried not to let that news hurt. He knew that Melanie was one to be there for her friends when they needed her—proof of that was his bout with that stomach bug. Still…it hurt.
The only good news—if one could call it that—was that they had a fairly good idea of who had Alana. On a whim, Tyler had suggested that Marcus run the name he’d come across for the phone number in Florida past Justin. If the attack was, in fact, associated with the previous ones on BlackThorpe, Tyler had thought Justin might recognize the name. And he had. They were now fairly convinced that the man who’d taken Alana was her ex-husband.
What remained a mystery was the connection between Craig Ellis and the mastermind behind the attacks, and Marcus’s intense focus on it had reached an all-new level. He no longer apologized for phoning late at night. When he needed information or wanted an update, the man was demanding in a way he hadn’t been before. Tyler’s stress about that only added to what he was already feeling with regards to Melanie.
“You need to call her, Ty.” The softly spoken words just twisted the knife in his gut.
Ryan sat on the other end of the couch, a serious look on his face. They’d just finished a pizza Ryan had picked up on his way home from another long day at work.
“I know. I will.”
“The longer this goes on, the harder it will be to break the silence between the two of you.”
Tyler leaned back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling. Ryan was absolutely right. But he just didn’t want to hear the words from her. The ones that would kill off their relationship and make a return to a friendship impossible. Adrianne had said he was good for her sister, but he wasn’t sure that Melanie felt the same way. Whatever she hadn’t been able to trust him with was still there.
He lifted his head when he felt the couch shift as Ryan got to his feet.
“I’ll keep praying for you guys,” he said as he picked up their garbage.
Tyler nodded his thanks, words failing him. Once he was alone, he pulled out his phone and stared at it. Still no call. Still no message. Only the picture he used as his lock screen. The selfie he’d taken of the two of them at the last Timberwolves game they’d gone to. He’d had so much hope that night.
As the ache in his chest increased, Tyler sat forward, elbows on his thighs as he pressed his hands to his eyes. He wondered if Ryan had recognized what he was barely able to admit to himself. He loved Melanie. He supposed he’d been a little bit in love with her for a while now, but over the past month or so, it had gotten to the point where when he imagined his future, it had included her.
Now that future was all out of focus.
His head dropped forward. Ryan’s words kept repeating in his head, and Tyler knew that for sure they’d have no future together if he wasn’t willing to fight for it. He had wanted her to come to him to show she trusted him, but maybe she needed to know that he still cared.
He flipped his phone over and over in his hand. It was already almost eleven o’clock so maybe a text would be better than a call. Or maybe he should wait for just one more day in case she wasn’t ready to talk to him yet.
The debate in his head continued as he got ready for bed, and finally, after crawling under the covers, he picked his phone up and tapped out a quick message and hit send before he could second-guess himself.
~*~*~
When her alarm went, Melanie reached to shut it off then rolled onto her back. In the past, she’d had no trouble getting out of bed when it was time. Most days she’d been eager to get her day underway. All of that had changed in the past few days. Now it took her far too long to prepare herself mentally to get up and face what the day held.
It was day four of this nightmare. It had been—and continued to be—devastating on so many levels. Her own emotions had already been so raw when Alex had asked her to spend more time with Justin. When she’d first agreed, she hadn’t realized the sole-wrenching impact it would have on her.
Realistically, if she’d known how challenging it would be to deal with Justin’s emotions on top of her own, she would have told Alex it wasn’t a good idea. The strong, in-control man had wept in her arms when she’d gone to see him that first time. Out of sight of Caden and his sister, he’d unburdened himself on her. And when he voiced every fear and vulnerability that Melanie had been experiencing herself, it was all just magnified.
But beyond that, seeing his absolute anguish over Alana’s abduction had just about done her in. If they weren’t able to get Alana back safely, Melanie feared that Justin would live out the rest of his life just a shell of the man he’d become because of the love they’d shared.
And that always brought her back to Tyler. Already she was feeling the loss of his presence in her life, and it hurt so much more than she could ever have imagined. If this was what she was feeling and her relationship with Tyler was fairly new, she couldn’t imagine what would happen if something happened to them later on down the road when their emotions were even more intertwined.
Pressing a hand to her heart, Melanie closed her eyes and let hot tears slip down her cheeks. Please God, help them find Alana and bring her back to Justin safe and sound. Please give Justin peace through all of this. And help me to know what to do about Tyler. He deserves better than me, but I want Your will for us.
She opened her eyes, blinking to clear away the moisture. Taking in several painful deep breaths, she began to prepare herself for what lay ahead. Fear continued to wrap its tendrils around her heart. No matter how much she prayed that God would take them away, they never left. It was all she could do to erect her temporary barriers before facing the world.
One more deep breath in and out.
Pushing up, Melanie swung her legs over the edge of the bed and sat up. Would this be the day that the nightmare ended? Or would it be just one more day to get through?
First up was a visit to Justin at the hospital. After that, she’d head out to the Wellness Center and try to get some work done. The whole atmosphere at all three BlackThorpe locations had taken on a somber tone. And Marcus was like a dark thundercloud moving ominously through the hallways of the company. Of course, his worry was compounded by the fact that Justin was his cousin.
With a sigh, Melanie grabbed her phone from the nightstand and checked to see how much time she’d wasted trying to mentally prepare herself.
Her heart skipped a couple of beats when she saw that she had a text.
Tyler Harris
I miss you.
A sob escaped before she could stop it. The band of tightness she hadn’t even realized had encompassed her chest, snapped, and it was like she could breathe again. Bracing a hand on her leg, she bent forward and clo
sed her eyes.
Thank you, God.
His text didn’t automatically clear up their issues, but it did connect them again. She’d needed that to know that he hadn’t completely written them off.
With trembling fingers, she tapped out a response. I miss you too.
She was tempted to sit and wait for a reply, but she still had to get ready for the day. At least her heart was a little lighter as she made her way into the bathroom. Maybe they would get more good news today.
There was no reply to her text, but she knew from what Alex had said that Marcus had been working Tyler hard. No doubt he was already at the office. As she walked out the door to head to the hospital, Melanie told herself that it may well be evening before Tyler would have a chance to get back to her. After all, the message he’d sent had come in after eleven the night before.
“How is he this morning?” Melanie asked the nurse at the station. Beth had given them permission to update her as they’d fallen into a bit of a ritual with spending time with him. Melanie came in the morning then once Beth had gotten Caden off to school and Dan’s mother was there to watch her little girl, she came up for a few hours. Then Dan brought Caden up in the afternoon when he was done school. In the evening, Alex or some of the other guys from BlackThorpe would go to visit him.
The nurse’s brows drew together. “He seems withdrawn more than usual.”
Melanie hated to hear it but had figured it was only a matter of time. When she pushed open the door to his room, she saw that he was lying with his eyes closed. She wasn’t going to assume he was asleep. She knew all about pretending sleep in order to avoid having to talk to people.
She moved to the side of the bed and sank down on the chair there. Reaching out to take his hand, she said, “Morning, Justin.”
His chest rose and fell as he took a shuddering breath before opening his eyes. The heartbreak Melanie saw there had her tightening her grasp on his hand. She knew that today wasn’t going to be a day for words. At least not from him.
When his eyes slid shut again, Melanie stared at her friend. The hard edges of his face seemed even more pronounced as he lay there. And when a tear trickled down his cheek and dropped onto the pillow, Melanie leaned forward and laid her hand on his cheek.
“Oh, Justin.” Seeing this man’s pain was heartbreaking. Then she remembered the day Tyler had seen her heartache and prayed for her. Could she do the same for Justin? Would he find the same peace she had? Did she even know how to pray in a situation like this?
Keeping one hand on his cheek and the other grasping one of his, Melanie bent her head. She prayed silently for a few minutes, but the feeling that he needed to hear her words rose inside her. Softly, she began to say the words aloud, feeling his fingers wrap around hers as she did.
She didn’t think too much about the words that came out. If it came to her mind, she said it. Over the past few days, the words of Tyler and the pastor about bad things happening had replayed in her mind on an endless loop. Even Justin’s words about seeking God’s will had been part of the litany. When it came right down to it, their words were the ones that made sense and gave her any measure of peace in this horrible situation.
The only time doubts rose in her mind came when she allowed herself to think about the fact that she was no longer guaranteed protection from bad things happening to her in the way she thought she had been. Aside from that first day, Justin hadn’t touched on that again. It was as if he’d processed it and figured out how to deal with it. She needed to know how he’d done that, but this was the time for his healing. Hers would come later.
“Thank you.” Justin’s gruff words at the end of her prayer had Melanie lifting her head to look at him.
Relief spread through her when she saw that some of the tension had eased from his face though his eyes still shone with his heartbreak. “Praying is kind of a new thing for me. I wasn’t sure…”
“I hear ya.” The corners of his mouth lifted and his gaze lost focus. “I felt the same way when I started to pray out loud. Alana always tells me that God knows the prayers of our hearts whether we’re eloquent or stumbling over our words.”
“I’m relieved to hear that because I think I’m still stumbling around,” Melanie said as she sat back from him but left her hand resting on his.
“Want to tell me what’s up with your eyes?” Justin asked.
Melanie looked down at the bed. She’d rehearsed what she’d say to people who’d ask when she’d decided this morning to leave her contacts out. But Justin was different. He was a friend. “Are you ready for a long story?”
Justin nodded. “I figured it might be. I could use the distraction, to be honest.”
By the time Melanie made it to the Wellness Center just after eleven, her emotional state had shifted to a more positive place. Telling Justin her story had been freeing and now gave her the courage to share it with Tyler. And if things changed between them because of it, at least she’d know. Slowly, she was picking a path through the rubble that had been left behind when the foundation she’d built her life on had shattered.
“Good morning.” Heather greeted her with a smile when she walked into the office. “How is Justin this morning? Any news on Alana?”
“Nothing on Alana,” Melanie said. “But Justin seemed a bit better today.”
“I can’t imagine what he must be going through,” Heather said. “The not knowing has to be the hardest.”
Melanie remembered her parents saying the same thing about the time she’d been gone. “All we can do is pray that she’ll be released soon.”
Heather nodded. “And you’re doing okay?”
Melanie gave her a small smile. “I’ll be fine. Compared to what Justin is going through…it’s put things in perspective for me.”
“Well, you can relax for a bit. You don’t have any appointments until one.”
She chuckled at that. “Relax? I still have plenty of other stuff that I need to catch up on. And on that note, I’d better get to it.”
Once she was seated at her desk, Melanie took a moment to draw in a deep breath and let it out. She needed to shift her focus from Justin to her work at the Center.
She’d only been working about twenty minutes when Heather appeared in the doorway, a worried look on her face. “Uh…just got a call saying there’s something happening down in the garden. They thought you’d want to check it out.”
Melanie propped her chin on her hand. “What’s going on?”
“No details. They just said you’d probably need to deal with it.”
“Okay.” Never an end to problems these days. Melanie pushed back from her desk and grabbed her phone. She quickly looked at the display to see if she’d missed anything, but the screen was as blank as it had been the last time she checked. Another distraction might be good.
When she got downstairs, she saw Molly standing at the entrance to the garden. The older woman gave her a small smile when she saw her. “Sorry to interrupt your work, but it seemed important you deal with this situation.”
“That’s alright, Molly. Where is the problem? And what is the problem? Heather didn’t say.”
“They’re in the back corner by the falls. Not sure what the problem is, just had one of the residents come tell me that there was someone back there that was refusing to talk to anyone but you.”
Melanie nodded. Though she didn’t interact with each of the residents on a personal level during their stay, she did meet them all when they arrived at the Center and sometimes she went on to spend time with them if they requested it. Usually, that meant they showed up at her office door, but it wasn’t unheard of for her to go to them if needed.
Hoping she was in the right frame of mind to deal with the situation, she said a quick prayer for wisdom as she made her way to one of the more secluded parts of the garden. It was somewhat surprising how quickly praying had become her response when facing something she wasn’t sure how to handle.
She followed th
e rounded path that led to the back corner, the serenity of the setting calming the edges of her frazzled nerves. When she rounded the last corner, her steps slowed as she took in the scene before her.
A small round table set for two.
Two chairs.
And Tyler standing behind it all.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
WHEN MELANIE CAME into view, Tyler held his breath, waiting to see her reaction. She looked so good. As usual, she wore one of her pantsuits, but it was her face that had his attention. He wanted to go to her and take her into his arms, but he waited.
“Tyler?” She moved the last few feet until she stood on the other side of the table from him.
He noticed immediately that she wasn’t wearing her brown contacts. Her blue eyes met his, and he saw all kinds of emotion in them. “I thought we needed to talk.”
She glanced at the table then over her shoulder. “You had some help with this.”
“I did. Quite a few people helped make this happen. Heather. Molly. Ryan. Your brother.”
“Alex?”
“Yes. I asked him if it would be okay if we each took a little time off today. He was all for it.” Tyler moved to stand behind one of the chairs. “Would you like to sit down?”
Melanie nodded and stepped toward the chair he held for her. She hesitated for a moment and more than anything, Tyler wanted to touch her. Not yet. He caught a whiff of her perfume as she sank into the chair in front of him.
He quickly rounded the table and took the other seat. “Heather helped me get some food from the deli, so I hope you’ll like it.”
A small smile played at the corners of Melanie’s mouth. “To be honest, I think eating is about the last thing I can do right now.”
Tyler nodded. “So can I just dive right in and ask about your eyes?”
Without hesitation, Melanie nodded. She appeared to take a deep breath as her gaze dropped briefly to the table. When she looked back up, he saw fear on her face and wanted to instantly reassure her, but he waited.
A Matter of Trust: A Christian Romance (BlackThorpe Security Book 3) Page 25
