by Susan Renee
He walks us all the way to our door to make sure we both make it safely. In reality, two girls walking alone at night…one clearly drunk…the other tipsy, at the very least, is probably not a good idea. I’m grateful for Finn’s presence this evening in more ways than one. I would love for him to stay, but I need to make sure Abby doesn’t wake up worshiping the porcelain throne in the morning. And I know I’ll be spending the entire day with Finn tomorrow. I get Abby in the door and into the bathroom so she can brush her teeth and sit for a minute to settle her stomach while I walk Finn out to say goodnight.
“Thank you so much for your help tonight, Finn. I seriously don’t know what I would’ve done had you not been there.”
Finn chuckles quietly. “You’re welcome. It was my pleasure to be there with you, even for a short time. We should go dancing more often. You’re pretty good.”
“Mmm, you’re not so bad yourself. I had fun. And thank you…for letting Abby and me have our time together. I appreciate it as much as she does. She needed tonight.”
“I wouldn’t dream of taking you away from her. I know better than to piss off the best friend,” he jokes. “In fact, I should go so you can get back to her. She did need tonight, and now she may need your help in there.”
“Yeah.” I can’t stop smiling at him.
I don’t want to go in and help Abby. I want to keep smiling at Finn.
“Yeah, I guess I should.” I’m still smiling at him. I must be more buzzed than I thought.
Finn tries his best to hide a smile but fails miserably. He shakes his head as he chuckles and reaches out to grab my arm.
“Come here, Beautiful.” I walk willingly into Finn’s arms and connect my lips with his. Alcohol doesn’t make me sad or angry or a loud talker, but it does make me lose my inhibitions. What starts as an innocent goodbye kiss quickly grows into a panty melting grope session right here in the hallway of my apartment building. Finn’s kiss deepens as he walks me backwards until my back is against the wall next to my apartment door. As he holds on to me, swirling his tongue around mine, I reach up and grab his biceps. Finn pushes his weight into me against the wall a little more. Not having to hold on to me anymore, his hands start to roam, one up the right side of my body and the other around to softly cup my behind. The butterflies in my stomach are fluttering ferociously. I’m nervous to have Finn touch me, but the alcohol in me has me so eager to just lose control. Tonight, the alcohol is making me brave.
It has been too…long…since I’ve had a physical attraction this strong to anyone. My hands roam slowly down Finn’s body towards his waist line, searching for what I know will be the obvious proof of Finn’s arousal, but before I know it, our kiss is over, and Finn has stepped back away from me. Our breathing unsteady, Finn and I gaze at each other.
“You should go. Abby needs you, and if you stay out here one more minute, I can’t promise I won’t take advantage of you, and I’m not that guy.”
Damn Finn and his personal control!
How does he do it?
I’m buzzed.
Finn is HOT.
I want him.
Not here…not in this hallway.
Abby needs me…
“Yeah. I should go.” I’m still breathing hard and staring at Finn.
“Yeah.” Finn leans over and kisses my cheek
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Beautiful.”
“Yeah,” I breathe. “Goodnight.”
Finn waits to make sure I’m inside the door safely before he turns and leaves but not before I see him run his hands through his hair. I smile and walk back to the bathroom to tend to Abby, who is sitting on the side of the bathtub with her eyes closed. I help clean the sweat and make-up off of her face. I put two ibuprofen tablets in her hand and give her another glass of water. Hopefully, she won’t wake up too hung over in the morning.
“You’re the best, Olivia,” Abby says with a tired smile.
“Anything for you, Abs. Thanks for a fun night. I really had a great time.”
“Yeah, you did.” She’s smirking at me and giggling every couple seconds. “Seriously, he’s a catch, Olivia, and he’s seriously into you. Way more than Trent ever was towards me. Don’t you ever walk away from him. He’s good for you.”
I look her in the eye when she speaks to me, but her gaze is clouded by alcohol and exhaustion.
“Yeah, he is pretty special, Abs.”
She asks me the one question I’ve been waiting for but don’t know if I’m ready to answer, “Do you love him yet?”
I stop wringing out the washcloth I had grabbed for her. I’m stumped. I’ve thought about saying the L-word, but it freaks me out a little bit of a lot. Loving Finn means seriously committing, and seriously committing means moving forward, and moving forward means the possibility of an end, and an end is not something I want to consider just yet. In fact, I fear it. I felt the end coming when I was dating Archer in high school, but I fear I won’t feel an end coming with Finn; it will hit me out of nowhere, and I will be hurt worse than anticipated. It’s morbid of me to have these thoughts I know, but sometimes, I just can’t help it.
“I don’t know, Abs. I don’t not love him. I more than just like him but I don’t…I don’t know if I would say love just yet. I can’t say it, yet. He still doesn’t know about…about me.”
“Hmm, pity. It’s obvious after watching him with you that he loves you, Olivia…but you must not want to see it, yet.” Abby lifts herself off the side of the tub and heads for her bedroom. She stops when she gets to me and gives me a quick kiss on the cheek. “Good night, Liv. Thanks for taking my mind off my shitty afternoon.”
“Good night, Abby,” I say softly. I consider her words. Finn hasn’t yet said those three big words to me, and I’ve never asked for that; but the more I think of him, of seeing him tonight on the dance floor, hearing him say he didn’t want me to think he didn’t trust me, his understanding face when he told me to stop worrying about how I look, I guess I really do have to consider what she said about the way he feels about me.
He strengthens me.
When I’m with Finn, he makes me feel like nobody else matters to him but me.
I’m definitely falling for him.
I look at myself in the mirror before heading to bed.
“I’m falling for you, even if I fall because of you,” I whisper to my reflection.
10
Finn picks me up just before ten o’clock the next morning to make the drive out to see his mother. Apparently, it’s tradition in the Kellan family to be together for the Fourth of July. Finn says they keep it relatively quiet with just some close friends and family, but in the past, they used to throw one hell of a party. I’m honored to be asked, even if I am a bit nervous.
“So, where does your Mom live again?”
“Wellesley. It’s a suburb of Boston, only about a half hour away, but with all this Fourth of July traffic, I figured it might take us longer to get out there than usual. Mom’s planning a lunch for us and a few of her friends since we have evening plans to see fireworks.”
“And, Wellesley is where you grew up, I take it?”
“Yes. Born and raised in the house we’re going to. It’s my home away from home.” Finn looks over at me smiling through his aviator sunglasses.
He looks gorgeous today. He’s wearing a pair of khaki shorts and a steel blue short-sleeved shirt that rolls slightly at the sleeves. It has three buttons on the front that are all open to show the top of Finn’s well defined chest. Seeing him dressed down like this makes me feel like I’m just dating any normal guy and not one of the hottest young bachelor CEOs of Boston, or the eastern seaboard, or whatever.
“Great,” I say and smile shyly.
I turn my head and peer out my window to gather my wits. I’m nervous and afraid to admit it. I don’t want to be, but I am. It’s been a long time since I’ve had to be introduced to the parent of someone I’m dating; in fact, it’s been so long, I really feel like this
is all happening for the very first time.
What if Mrs. Kellan doesn’t like me?
What if I speak too fast or say the wrong thing or go on some lengthy rant that makes absolutely no sense and then everyone is staring at me like, “hey who’s that crazy girl, and is she still talking?” Then they all just stare at me like I’m some sort of alien freak, and I can’t just run away because I’ll be in a new place and won’t know where the hell I can run to?
I take a very deep breath in my nose and blow it out slowly, still peering out my window.
“Hey.” Finn puts his hand on my left thigh and squeezes to get my attention. I turn my head and look at him as he grabs my left hand and kisses it before putting it down with his on his lap.
“Stop worrying, Liv. She’s going to love you; I promise.”
“How do you know that? You don’t really know that, Finn. She could hate me.”
“Well she could, I suppose, but for one, Mrs. Hoover has already raved about you to her over the phone, and if Grace Hoover approves, my mother will approve. Trust me.”
“She what?!” This is news to me.
Finn laughs and rubs my hand that he’s holding with his thumb. “I overheard her talking to Mom on the phone this past week. I’m pretty sure you have nothing to worry about if Grace has anything to say about it.”
If this goes well, I’m going to buy Mrs. Hoover anything she damn well wants! Or maybe just some flowers or maybe a bottle of wine.
“But, Olivia, I also know that she’s going to like you because I’ve never brought a girl home before to meet the family officially.”
Yeah right.
He must say that to everyone.
“That’s ridiculous, Finn; certainly there have been at least one or two over the years.”
“No. Never.” He shakes his head adamantly.
“Why not?” I ask shocked and a little confused.
Finn shrugs and looks over at me. “I guess I just never found the right person, so I never saw a reason.”
“But you see a reason now?”
He looks over at me with an almost saddened expression. I worry for a second that maybe I upset him, but his hand sliding over to caress my knee says otherwise.
“Isn’t it obvious?” He asks quietly?
Is what obvious?
We pull into the Kellan estate around eleven o’clock. We park in the large circle driveway behind a few other cars, and Finn walks over to open my door and help me out.
“You look absolutely breathtaking today, by the way.”
“Thank you.”
I chose a long navy chevron maxi dress that has a solid navy halter neck top. I’m wearing my wedge sandals that I love and left my hair down because, after blowing it dry, I could see it was going to be a good hair day, and also because I love when Finn plays with my hair. He can’t really touch it much when it’s up off of my face. After seeing what Finn is wearing, though, I feel a tad overdressed. I guess since I’m meeting his mother and seeing the estate where we just pulled up, airing on the side of too dressy is a good thing. I take a deep breath and smile at Finn as he kisses my temple and places my right hand in his left to lead me into the house.
We walk into the foyer, and I immediately start looking around. From the entranceway, I can see a grand oak staircase leading to the second floor, a sitting room off to the left that has walls lined with filled bookshelves, I could spend all damn day in there, and what seems to be a formal dining area off to my right. These rooms look immaculate and also untouched by anyone. I guess most of the family living happens in the back of the house. The place is palatial, and I can’t understand why or even how just one person lives here now. We can hear laughter and talking coming from the back part of the house ahead of us, which is where Finn leads me.
We walk back towards the kitchen and round the corner to the casual dining space when Finn stops suddenly dead in his tracks causing me to walk right into him. I stumble and trip over my sandal and start to fall, but Finn catches me and steadies me so that I don’t look too much like a huge klutz. I look up at Finn and then around the dining room to see what caused him to stop so suddenly, but it turns out I don’t really need to look, the excited screaming is evidence enough.
“OH MY GOD, OLIVIA!!!! You didn’t tell me you were dating FINN!! Why the HELL didn’t you tell me you were dating FINN?”
My eyes rapidly dart across the room like a deer in the headlights to Mandy, whose jaw is on the floor. Well, okay maybe it isn’t on the floor, but it’s definitely only inches from the table.
Umm, awkward.
What the hell do I say now?
What do I do?
No seriously, what do I do?
I glance at Finn and try to swallow. He leans over and kisses my cheek and whispers, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know they were coming,” into my ear.
Finn smiles at the group seated around the table and puts his hand now around my waist. He turns to face Mandy and Karen.
“I’m sorry Mandy I…uh,” he says frowning and shaking his head slightly. “I didn’t know you guys were coming today.” He hitches his thumb in the direction of the driveway. “And I didn’t see either of your cars in the driveway.”
“Mandy got a new car just this past week,” Karen spoke up smiling. “We decided to take it for a spin today.”
Finn’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise. He looks back at me; I’m flushed with anxiety, and I try to calm my nerves without making it obvious that I’m overwhelmed. It’s not that I didn’t want Mandy and Karen to know, I just wanted to be the one to tell them. Now I feel like I’ve purposely been keeping this from them, which I have, so they have every reason to think I’m untrustworthy, which I’m not…but still.
“Well I guess the cat’s out of the bag now, huh? Um, everyone, this is my girlfriend, Olivia. Olivia…this is everyone.” Finn gestures around the room to those seated at the table
Mrs. Kellan gets up from her seat and immediately walks over to me with her arms open. She is a beautiful woman with shorter light brown hair with gray streaks that make her look like the elegant and sophisticated woman I’m sure she is. Her deep blue eyes are warm and welcoming as she smiles at Finn and me. Seriously, I could be looking at an older Mary Poppins right now.
“Olivia, it is so lovely to finally meet you dear. Finn has told me so much about you, and I’m so excited you could join us today.” She hugs me tightly. I relax a little and hug her back.
“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you as well, Mrs. Kellan. Thank you so much for having me today.”
“You’re always welcome in this house, Olivia. Any friend of Finn’s is a friend of mine.”
“Thank you.” I smile.
Finn kisses my temple again and gestures around the room introducing me. I meet two of Mrs. Kellan’s good friends, Tracy and Eliza, and then say hello again to Mandy and her mother Karen. Lucky for me, they’re both smiling approvingly.
Phew!
There are two seats beside Mandy and Karen, so Finn and I sit next to both of them for lunch.
“So,” Mandy whispers not so quietly to me. “Why didn’t you just tell me it was Finn? We’ve been talking about ‘Hot Runner Guy’ for weeks now.” She laughs.
“Hot runner guy?” Finn asks grinning proudly. Thank God he’s holding my hand under the table. He squeezes my hand, and I feel myself blush.
I look at both Finn and Mandy and also at Karen who, by virtue of her placement at the table, is listening to our conversation.
“I um…” I can feel my expression sadden slightly. I’m feeling unbelievably guilty for keeping this secret but know there’s no way I can talk around the now bright pink elephant in the room.
“I just didn’t want to give everyone the wrong first impression. I didn’t want to be that girl. I’m not that girl,” I say emphatically.
“That girl?” Mandy asks. “What girl?”
“You know; I didn’t want everyone to think I just got the job because I wa
s dating Finn.”
“Didn’t you, though?” Mandy asks smirking. She winks at me when I give her an oh-my-gosh-I-can’t-believe-you-just-said-that expression.
“Mandy!” Karen chides.
“In Olivia’s defense,” Finn chimes in. “I was the one who found her. She didn’t know who I was when we met. It was sort of a serendipitous encounter.” He squeezes the hand he’s holding under the table again, leaning over to place a quick kiss on my cheek. If I wasn’t blushing then, I am now.
“There’s no reason to be embarrassed, Olivia.” Karen assures me. “When preparation and passion meets opportunity, you take the leap. I think it was a great decision for you given the great work you’ve done so far.”
“Thank you.”
“And I know it was a great decision for Finn.” She eyes Finn at the table and smiles when her eyes meet Mrs. Kellan’s. “He’s never been happier.”
Mandy nudges me with her elbow and giggles. “So, I guess we have you to thank for Finn's good mood lately, eh? Keep it up, girl!”
Finn saves me from embarrassment. “Okay, okay enough of embarrassing Olivia. Let’s eat; I’m starving.”
11
The rest of our meal time is delightful. We lunch on chicken salad sandwiches, pasta salad, hummus and vegetables, and for dessert, strawberry shortcake a la mode. My stomach is happy, and my nerves are settled. I can feel my body relaxing next to Finn's. I find myself laughing and blushing at times, as Mrs. Kellan, Eliza and Tracy and even Karen tell old stories of Finn growing up. Even Mandy pipes in laughing at a few key moments. It’s clear that everyone around the table loves Finn. Not surprisingly to me Sydney's name is referenced a few times throughout conversation. The last time I hear her name, though, I steal a glance at Finn who looks a bit nervous and uncomfortable but smiles shyly, nonetheless.
