Solving Us

by Susan Renee

  “Hahaha! I know you can, Captain. I know you can!”

  Finn throws me onto the couch and lowers himself on top of me. He locks eyes with mine before sharing a very slow, very sweet kiss. “I really am glad you’re here, Liv. This is the first time in seven years that I’ve shared this anniversary with anyone other than my parents.”

  “I don’t want to be anywhere else, Finn. Thank you for letting me share it with you.” I kiss him gently. “I love you. You know that, right?”

  “Yeah,” He nods. “Yeah, I do. I love you, too, Olivia.”

  I give him another quick peck on his cheek. “Now get a blanket or two, and let’s get started on these movies. We have a lot to watch.”

  “Why don’t you grab your favorite blanket from the bedroom and go change into your pajamas, so I don’t feel so underdressed. I’ll get us some drinks to go with our snacks.”

  “You got it.”

  Once I’m comfortably snuggled next to my two favorite boys, Finn and I relax and settle in for a weekend of X-Men movies, junk food, puppy cuddling, and all around laziness, loving every minute of it.

  “It’s right over here,” Finn says, pointing to the gravestone with Sydney’s name on it.

  “It’s beautiful.” That is all I can say when we reach the spot.

  We stop in front of a gorgeous gray marble stone in a row of other headstones. Nearby is a beautiful oak tree and a small reflecting pond. Though a cemetery wouldn’t be my first choice as a place to hang out, the feeling here is serene, quiet, and quite welcoming. I hold Finn’s hand as he steps forward and places the red and yellow calla lilies on Sydney’s grave.

  “Hey, Syd,” Finn says quietly. “I miss you.” He releases a big breath that I watch escape into the cold air around us. “Every day I miss you, Syd, but especially today. I’m sorry, Syd. I’m so sorry.”

  I squeeze Finn’s hand in mine to let him know I’m with him and to help encourage him to be strong. He looks at me standing next to him, tears welling in his eyes. I shouldn’t be so surprised that this is still so hard for him. Hell, I still have my bad days, too, and my story hasn’t ended. I step into him a little more and wrap my arm around him, placing my hand on his chest to comfort him. We stand silently for a minute or two. I’m not certain of what I should say, if anything, so I remain silent and follow Finn’s lead. He clears his throat quietly before continuing his conversation with his little sister. “I know I usually come alone, but, Syd, I brought someone I want you to meet. Her name is Olivia, and, Syd, I know you would love her as much as I do if not more since, well, you know she’s a girl and stuff. You guys are the same age, so you would probably like the same stuff. I don’t know, but I love her, Sydney. She’s my everything, and I just wanted you to see her.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Sydney,” I say. “I’ve heard so many wonderful things about you. Thank you for sharing your brother with me. I promise to protect him and take care of him.”

  “Oh and, Syd,” Finn grabs the bag off the ground that we brought with us. “I wanted to bring you something but couldn’t decide what to bring, so we decided you might want a snack. Here you go.”

  Finn takes out the graham cracker and Hershey bar sandwich we made for Sydney and lays it on the ground next to the flowers. I smile endearingly as he leaves the gift for the sister he loves so much.

  “Enjoy. Love you, Sydster.” Finn sniffles as he backs up to where I’m standing. I wrap my arms around him and hug him with everything I have. I don’t know how many people fall in love in cemeteries, but I swear I fell deeper in love with him just now.

  “Thank you, Olivia.” Finn breathes into my ear as he kisses my hair.

  “For what?”

  “For coming here with me. For being with me this weekend. For knowing what I needed when I didn’t know it myself. I love you more than you can possibly know.”

  “I love you, too, Finn. I’m honored to be here with you. You know I would do anything for you. I never got to meet your sister, but I have to think in my heart that she would be very happy to see where your life has gone since she left you.”

  Finn takes my hand and leads me around the pond back to where we’re parked. We drive slowly out of the cemetery; the musical voices of Coldplay fill the car around us.

  This one’s for you, Sydney.

  28

  I wake up on the morning of December 18th with a smile on my face. I’m ready to spend the day with Abby preparing for our night of celebrations, but first, a good steady run is in order to kick my energy into gear. I pick up my phone and send a quick text to Finn before heading out on my run. I smile to myself knowing that the slightly cheesy song will make Finn laugh as he starts his morning, too.

  Me :“Good Time” - Owl City and Carly Rae Jepsen

  My phone dings, alerting me to a text message while I’m running through the park outside of our apartment building.

  Finn: Animals - Maroon 5

  I almost trip when I read the song title Finn sends me. He knows how much I obsess over Maroon 5. That song is one of those songs that can turn me on like nothing else, and Finn knows it. I roll my eyes at the innuendo I know he is giving me with his text and continue running. It’s a chilly run through town, as the forecast calls for cold temperatures and overcast skies for the next few days. A nor’easter is on its way this weekend, so I’m glad this gala is happening now. It’ll be nice to be snowed in for a few days with my Prince Charming. I take a quick break to stretch my calves before turning around to run home. My nerves for this evening have been creeping up on me, and I can feel the tension throughout my body. I just want everything to go perfectly. I shoot another quick text to Finn before heading back.

  Me: Don’t forget the flash drive I gave you yesterday for tonight.

  Finn: As if I could forget that. Haha! Nervous much?

  Me: Ooh touche. Sorry. Just going through my mental checklist before I get ready. On my morning run. Love you.

  Finn: Don’t worry. Karen is here helping me gather everything up. We’ll be fine. You’ll be great! Can’t wait to see you!

  “WHAT?”

  “NO!”

  “SHIT!”

  I begin pacing with my phone in one hand and my other hand on my hip. My anxiety level climbs another five notches.

  What does he mean Karen is helping him?

  Why is she even at the office today?

  Can I trust her?

  How can I trust her?

  How can I possibly tell Finn?

  I’ve kept him in the dark for six months.

  “SHIT!” I scream looking around quickly in hopes that nobody is within earshot; it appears I’m alone, which is good because I don’t want anyone to see me panic. I feel like I don’t have a choice anymore. I have to tell Finn everything. He has to know the truth now before everything is ruined; but what if she’s already spoken to him, and if she has, what has she said? I know I’m about to make a rash decision, but I don’t have time to think any more. I start running in the opposite direction of home, hoping that when I reach my destination I’ll know exactly what to say. In about twelve minutes, I’m jogging into the Kellan Agency, surprisingly a sweaty mess given the temperature outside. My face feels windblown and chapped, but my body is on fire with rage, anxiety, and worry about what Karen may or may not be doing to our campaign. She wouldn’t dare do this to Finn, would she?

  I jump off the elevator as soon as it opens and run into the lobby near Finn’s office. Mrs. Hoover isn’t here, which I think is a little odd. She’s usually here whenever Finn is here but then again, he was only stopping in for a couple hours this morning to finish a report and reply to a few emails before packing up for the night. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that she’s not here; she’s probably out getting ready for the gala herself. I continue briskly down the hall towards Finn’s office and barge through his door without even thinking to knock first. As soon as I do, I immediately regret it.

  “Olivia? What are you...? Are you okay?
” Finn drops the brochures that he was holding onto the conference table in front of him and dashes to my side. He runs his hands down my face and arms lifting them as he goes.

  What’s he looking for?

  Injuries?

  He thinks I’m hurt and came running here?

  “Yeah I’m...fine. I’m fine.” I try to brush his hands off of me to show him that I’m okay, but he just looks at me in shock.

  “I don’t understand, Liv; what are you doing here?”

  “Yeah, Liv. I thought you and Abby had manis and pedis this morning?” I look across the room and see Karen and Mandy standing at the conference table. It looks as though they’re filling boxes. I had no idea Mandy was here, too. Finn never told me that she was here helping him as well. Now I’m the one confused.

  “Umm, yeah I do, but they’re not until twelve-thirty and I…”

  Think of something to say fast, Olivia!

  “Well, I was running in the area this morning and thought I would stop in and help. I uh…I’m sorry I didn’t know you guys were both here. I thought I would just surprise you.” I look at Finn and try my damnedest to smile, even though smiling is the very last thing I want to do.

  “Well I am surprised, so thank you for that. And you must be more nervous than I thought,” Finn chuckles and kisses me on my cheek. “Because I texted you about twenty minutes ago that Karen was here helping me. You didn’t need to worry about it. You’re sure you’re okay?”

  “Right. Yeah. You did tell me that. I’m sorry; I guess I’m just anxious about tonight. I know what a huge deal this is for you, Finn.” I turn my head to stare at Karen as I speak. “I just don’t want anything to go wrong that would make the company look bad.”

  “Of course you don’t, Olivia. Your feelings are completely normal,” Karen tries to assure me. “I was just telling Finn how proud of you both I am. This campaign is magnificent. You’ve both put in a lot of time and effort for a great cause. I’m certain tonight will be your time to shine, and everyone who loves you will be there to celebrate with you.”

  “Liv, all the work is done. We were just packing up all the promotional materials. The huge campaign banner was directly delivered to the hospital, and Finn has the flash drive with tonight’s presentation. We just went through it together before you walked in. It’s fantastic!” Mandy winks as she walks toward me.

  “Now, you stink, and you look all windblown from running. Go home and relax, and then get your pretty self ready to shake it off with me and the gang tonight! You’re going to need your energy! In fact, maybe you should take Finn with you and work off some that nervous energy with him, if ya know what I’m sayin’.” She gives me the double eyebrow raise and winks again which makes me laugh. Seriously, this girl has no filter.

  “That sounds like a great plan!” Finn turns to me. “I’m sure these ladies can close up the office. I’ll take you home.”

  “NO!” I say a little too emphatically.

  Mandy, Karen, and Finn all turn to look at me curiously; a little taken aback by my outburst.

  I cringe. “I mean, no thank you.”

  “Olivia.”

  I’m obviously looking like a sporadic nutcase to Finn. The confounded look on his face says it all. He’s not sure what to make of my presence.

  “Mandy is right,” I try to explain. “I’ll need my energy for tonight like she said, and besides…Abby would kill me if she knew I was here right now. She’s playing the part of my father today, and doesn’t think I should see you until gala time.”

  Finn sighs and places his hands on each side of my face. “Okay. I understand. I won’t argue with Abby. She can have you for lunch, but I get you for after-hours dessert.” He whispers as he leans in for a kiss; a kiss that is so warm and soft that I forget everything going on in my life for about fifteen long seconds.

  “I’ll be there at four to pick you up.”

  “I’ll be waiting.” I smile with my eyes half closed. I look around the room for a moment, to Finn’s desk, to his couch, and sigh softly when my eyes reach the conference table. What I wouldn’t give to be able to kick Karen and Mandy out of this room and lay myself out for him on that table right now.

  “Soon.” He whispers in my ear and chastely kisses the side of my neck, my OMG-spot. “I know what you’re thinking, and it will happen soon. I promise you that, and I assure you, Beautiful, that table’s never seen that much action.”

  I start to melt into Finn’s kiss when I spy Karen watching us from across the room. Mandy is obliviously closing a box and moving it from the table to the floor. Karen raises one eyebrow in my direction, giving me a very clear indication of what she wishes she could say but never would in Finn’s presence. It would be some snide remark about mixing business with pleasure.

  I clear my throat and lean back quickly away from Finn as inconspicuously as I can. “Right. Well, umm...I look forward to that meeting, Mr. Kellan. Until then, I should be on my way. I have a hot date tonight.”

  “Yes. You do, and it’s already taking all of my focus to not be at your door right now, wanting to spend this entire weekend with you, so go. Get out of my sight until I can really have you in my arms for the night.”

  Finn kisses me one more time, rubbing the tip of his nose with mine, before letting me go. I smile and say my goodbyes to Karen and Mandy and walk out of Finn’s office. In hindsight, I feel a little guilty for barging in on their work, but I’m also glad I did. At least I feel a little more assured that Finn has seen the final product today, and Mandy is helping to pack it all up. Karen would have to work pretty hard to try and sabotage our work.

  29

  At ten minutes till four, there’s a knock on our apartment door. Knowing Finn likes to be a little early, my heart is aflutter as I open the door. I’m excited for him to see me in my dress.

  “Well if it isn’t the most beautiful princess I’ve ever seen.”

  I smile warmly at the handsome gentleman standing at my door. I’m flattered. “Well thank you, Mr. Rivers, and don’t you look absolutely dashing yourself. You clean up well, you sexy thing.”

  “Hey! Who are you calling sexy?” Abby shouts walking down the hall toward the front door looking dazzling in her black and white gown.

  “Whoa!” Austin says as his jaw falls toward the floor. He shakes his head in disbelief and awe. “God, I’m a lucky man that this princess here has a smokin’ hot roommate. Come to daddy, you beautiful woman.”

  Abby and I laugh at Austin as he walks through the door to Abby, dipping her in a sexy as hell but very cute kiss. I turn to close the door only to find Finn standing in the doorway looking like he just saw a ghost. My smile dissipates immediately.

  “Finn?”

  “Olivia...you...you…” His eyes scan my body, my face, my hair, and I wonder for a moment if there’s something wrong with my dress.

  I frown slightly. “Finn? What’s wrong?”

  “You’re gorgeous. Stun-stunning even,” he stutters. “Shit. Those aren’t even the right words to describe how you look right now; I’m sorry. You sort of took my breath away for a moment.”

  I can’t hide my smile, obviously. I feel myself blushing at his sweet compliments.

  “Well, I don’t see anything wrong with that!” I let out a deep breath and laugh at Finn’s amazed expression “You scared me, you big hot handsome hunk! Get in here!”

  I tug on Finn’s arm and pull him inside the door and into my embrace. He is dapperly dressed in a black three-piece tuxedo with a black bowtie. He smells divine, and I immediately remind myself that we actually have to go to an event. We can’t stay here in each other’s arms; really, I could do this all night and be quite content.

  “You smell fantastic, Finn, and I’m not sure you could look more handsome if you tried.”

  “Thanks, but I’m pretty sure I don’t hold a candle to the gorgeous babe I’m holding in my arms right now. I brought you something.”

  “What is it?” I look around quickly
even though I don’t remember Finn having anything in his hands when he was in the doorway a moment ago.

  “Well, I would’ve gotten you a corsage or something to wear on prom night, but since this isn’t actually a high school prom, I thought maybe you deserved an upgrade.”

  I watch as Finn digs his hand into his hidden jacket pocket producing a little light blue gift box with black lettering and tied with a white bow. I gasp in shock.

  That’s a Tiffany’s box.

  He went to Tiffany’s.

  It’s not….

  Is it…?

  It’s not….

  It can’t be….

  I study the box quickly as he hands it to me. It’s not a small enough box to be a ring and not the shape of a necklace box. I untie the bow and open the box. Inside is a light blue pouch, which I pull from the box and open. Inside the box is a pair of stunning olive leaf drop earrings in sterling silver with a pearl dangling on the end. They’re beautiful; they’re classy and sophisticated.

  “Oh Finn! These are gorgeous. They’re more than gorgeous, but you spent way too much. I can’t.”

  “Yes you can, and yes you will. I promise I didn’t spend a fortune on them, and I promise that they will look exquisite with your dress this evening.”

  Abby looks over my shoulder to see the earrings in my hand. “And I have just the thing to go with it, Liv! Be right back,” she says as she makes her way down the hall to her bedroom. She reappears seconds later with a bracelet in her hand.

  “This will go perfectly. Here, put this on.” Abby hands me a silver bangle bracelet with three small pearls set in between antique filigree. It’s beautiful and compliments my new earrings perfectly. I can’t help but smile, feeling like Cinderella getting ready for the ball. All of the people in this room with me right now care about me and want to see me happy. This is our night, Finn’s and mine. We’ve worked hard for this, and I can’t wait to share the evening with some of my best friends. I smile to myself as I see another side to my Rubik’s Cube of a life lock into place.