Cole was tired. The woman he loved had refused to admit she loved him. Now his mother had given her every reason to refuse to see or speak to him. Getting her to admit she loved him was going to be harder than ever.
“Go home, Mother, and take Sibyl with you. Find her a nice husband, one you can approve of, one who will do everything in his power to please you. He doesn’t have to be rich. You can give him all the money you were planning to give me. I don’t want it or the life you want me to lead.”
“But you can’t want this,” his mother said, gesturing at the tent and the boxes and props, “or her.”
“I don’t give a damn about the Wild West Show,” Cole said, “but I can’t live without Drew. Now you might as well go home and forget me. I need to finish packing. Then I’ve got to figure out how to make Drew fall in love with me.”
“Where are you going?”
“Wherever Drew goes.”
Drew was nowhere to be found. She wasn’t in her hotel room, and she hadn’t returned to her aunt. Neither Zeke nor Hawk would tell him where she had gone.
“You stay away from her,” Zeke said.
“You bother her again, I cut your throat,” Hawk added.
Cole considered the warning unnecessary. Hawk had unsheathed his knife the moment he set eyes on Cole.
“I just want to talk to her,” Cole said.
“She doesn’t want to talk to you,” Zeke said.
“She never want to talk to you again,” Hawk added.
“We have to talk,” Cole said. “We have an act together.”
“No more,” Hawk said. “Drew shoot alone.”
“But we still have several shows before New Orleans,” Cole said.
“She’s going to ask Jake to bring Will when he comes to New Orleans. He can take your place.”
“But he doesn’t know the routine,” Cole said.
“He learn,” Hawk said. “Now go. Drew do not want to see you again.”
Cole didn’t intend to give up this easily. He’d ask around. If nothing else, he’d follow Hawk and Zeke. Sooner or later they would lead him to Drew.
But several hours later he still hadn’t found Drew. Hawk and Zeke were working with the crew to get everything loaded on the train, but Drew was nowhere in sight. It was obvious Hawk and Zeke knew Cole was watching them. They didn’t mean to catch up with Drew until it was too late for him to follow.
“Have you seen Drew?” he asked Myrtle.
Myrtle was packing costumes. She didn’t look up and she didn’t favor him with her usual welcoming smile. “Not since your mother was here.”
By now everybody in the show knew he was the son of a wealthy businessman, and they had started to back away from him. Cole hadn’t realized until now how much he had enjoyed the easy camaraderie that involved no elaborate social rituals, that required no classification of people according to ancestry or wealth. He feared it would be hard, if not impossible, to recapture.
“I’ve got to talk to her, but I can’t if I can’t find her.”
Myrtle got even busier. “She was very upset with you.”
“I know, but I can explain why I didn’t tell her about my background.”
“I don’t think she wants to hear it.”
“I know that, too. First she thought I was a drifter. Now she knows I’m a liar. She probably thinks I’m a drifting liar with a string of women behind me.”
Myrtle looked up. “She doesn’t think that.”
“You heard what she said.”
“She was upset.”
“I was upset, too.”
“What about?” She seemed less rigid, but she exhibited none of her former friendliness. Cole took a costume from her hands and forced her to look at him.
“I love her. I want to marry her, but she’s certain she hates men, that she never wants to marry, that she wants to live on that blasted ranch by herself for the rest of her life.”
“She’s invited me to live with her when I retire.”
“She’s invited half the world to live with her, but she hasn’t invited me to come within a hundred miles of the place. Hawk has threatened to cut my throat if I come anywhere near her.”
Myrtle shook her head. “He wouldn’t do that. He’s a nice boy.” She studied him for a moment, and cupped his cheek with her hand. “You don’t look happy.”
“I’m not.”
She dropped her hand. “Drew looked unhappy too, more unhappy than I’ve ever seen her.”
“That’s because she really does love me, but won’t let herself believe it.”
“Are you sure?”
“As sure as I live and breathe.”
Myrtle began to make nervous movements with her hands. “She said she didn’t want to talk to you.”
“She’s just afraid her marriage will be like her parents’.”
Myrtle was quiet a moment longer. “She did look very unhappy.”
“Where did she go?”
“I’m not supposed to tell you, but I guess it doesn’t matter now. She’s going by steamboat.”
Cole was on his feet and running in an instant.
“It’s too late,” Myrtle called after him. “The boat will have left by now.”
The steamboat pulled away from the docks late because one of the wagons bringing barrels of tobacco had broken down. Cole jumped on the gangplank just as they were hauling it on board. It took him only a short while to find Drew’s cabin, but he decided to wait until she had had time to feel she wasn’t being pursued, maybe even to regret she’d run away. Then she might be more willing to listen to him.
But forcing himself to wait until Drew came out of her cabin was just about the hardest thing Cole had ever done. He’d never wanted anything so much in his life, and he’d never felt so helpless to get it.
He waited over two hours before she left her cabin. She wore a coat. She was going up on deck. Cole followed her at a distance until she reached the upper deck. She looked fore and aft, undecided, then turned toward the front of the boat. Cole waited, watching from the darkened stairwell, while she moved slowly toward the rail, reached out, and grasped it. She faced forward, letting the wind whip through her hair. She pulled her coat more closely about her shoulders. It was cold at night on the river.
Suddenly he saw her shoulders shake and her head drop. Then he heard the sound. She was crying. He couldn’t stand to wait a moment longer. He was out of the stairwell and across the deck in a matter of seconds.
“Please don’t cry. I never wanted to make you unhappy.”
With a startled gasp, Drew spun around. Cole was certain he saw welcome and relief in her eyes, but caution and fear were quick to crowd them out.
“What are you doing here?” she asked. “How did you find me?”
“Myrtle told me, but she thought the boat had left”
“So you followed me even though you knew I didn’t want to see you.”
“Is that why you were crying, because you were so happy you wouldn’t have to see me again?”
Drew turned away. “You have no right to spy on me.”
“I have every right. I love you, Drew.”
“You lied to me. You—”
“I had a very good reason. If you’ll just give me a chance, I can explain everything.”
The moonlight wasn’t very bright, but he thought he could see relief, even hope, in her eyes.
“There’s no excuse for lying.”
“You may not agree with it, but there’s a reason.”
“Okay, tell me.”
She squared her shoulders as if to tell him she wasn’t going to believe him regardless of what he said. He took a deep breath and dived in.
“I’m the only son of a rich man and a socially prominent mother,” he said. “From the moment of my birth, I had everything anybody could want.”
“Then why did you pretend you were a drifter?”
“My mother wanted me to marry someone of equal prominence, settle down in some big
house on the river, and raise a family.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Like you, I didn’t want to get married. I especially didn’t want to be part of Memphis society. I was bored, felt hemmed in and angered by all the rules of social etiquette. I come from a long line of adventurers. I guess I’m a throwback.”
“Your mother must have been very unhappy.”
“My mother is always unhappy when she doesn’t get her way. She was furious when I joined the Texas Rangers. I didn’t tell her what I was doing now because I thought she’d be happier not knowing.”
“Why aren’t you with the Rangers now? Did the wanderlust bite you again?”
“I was asked to become an undercover agent for the government”
“Doing what?”
“I’m not at liberty to say. But I can tell you why I joined the Wild West Show.”
“So you didn’t just walk down out of the stands one night”
“No. I’m supposed to find out who’s behind a series of robberies. I wormed my way into your act so I could watch things from the inside.”
“I don’t know about any robberies. Has someone been stealing money from the show?”
Her obvious surprise was all the proof he needed to know she had nothing to do with the robberies.
“Several banks and business have been robbed over the last two years, and the Wild West Show has always been in the vicinity when the robberies have taken place.”
“Who do you suspect?”
“That’s what I’m here to find out”
She believed him, he was certain of that, but he had expected her to smile, relief to flood her body, and a welcoming smile to curve her lips. Instead she looked as cold and rigid as ever.
“I hope you find him.”
“Is that all you’re going to say?”
“What else do you expect?”
“I told you this to prove I’m not a drifter or a liar.”
“I’m sorry I accused you of being either one, but you have to admit that’s what you acted like.”
“I don’t care about that. I just want to know my not being a drifter and a liar makes a difference with you.”
“Instead you’re a manipulator, a schemer, a conniver, weaving a web to catch a thief. I was part of your web.”
Cole couldn’t restrain himself any longer. He closed the distance between himself and Drew, took her by the arms, and pulled her to him. “The Wild West Show was my web. You were something totally different. You were unlike any woman I’d ever met. You didn’t care about money or social position. You wanted your ranch, and nothing else mattered. You were determined to earn the money to pay for it yourself because you wanted to feel it was truly yours. I didn’t understand you, but I was drawn to you from the first moment. I fought it as hard as I could, but it didn’t do any good. I fell in love with you.”
“I don’t want anybody to be in love with me,” Drew said, but Cole could tell she didn’t believe that anymore.
“Maybe not, but you can’t stop me from loving you. I’m giving you fair warning, I don’t mean to give up. I’ve never wanted anything in my life as much as I want your love. I’ll pursue you with dogged single-mindedness. I’ll follow you wherever you go. I’ll give you no rest. I’ll beg, plead, entice—”
“If you follow me back to the Broken Circle, my brothers will shoot you.”
“I’ll look so pathetic, so worn down to skin and bones, Isabelle will take pity and protect me. She’ll take me inside and nurse me back to health. All the while she’ll be berating you for being so coldhearted as to drive a wonderful man like me to the brink of madness.”
He was certain of it. There was a definite twinkle in her eye.
“I always knew you had a glib tongue, but I never realized the lengths to which you would go to get what you want.”
“Neither did I. You’ve inspired me to new heights.”
“I think it’s called depths.”
“I’ve been there, too. When you wouldn’t speak to me. When I couldn’t find you. When I was afraid I’d never see you again.”
“Cole, I’m not going to tell you I don’t like you, but I’ve never considered being in love. It’s come as a complete surprise.”
“It’s supposed to be wonderful.”
“For a woman who’s always insisted upon being in control, it’s frightening. You have to give me time to try to figure out the true nature of my feelings.”
“I will. You can. As long as I can be with you, I don’t care how long it takes…. That’s a lie,” he said, grinning in spite of himself. “I will begrudge you every minute, but I will wait. Just allow me to—”
The steamboat shuddered, then lurched violently to one side, pitching Drew and Cole headlong into the icy waters of the Mississippi.
Chapter Twenty
The icy water penetrated Cole’s clothing instantly, threatening to paralyze his muscles. He fought the cold and the drag of waterlogged clothes. He had to find Drew.
He broke the surface and drew a life-giving breath into his burning lungs. For one terrifying minute he couldn’t find Drew. He turned in circles, scanning the surface made luminous by the moonlight but broken up by the steamboat’s wake. Then he saw her several feet away, struggling to keep her head above water. With a lunge and a shout, he swam toward her. “Keep kicking,” he called. “I’m coming.” He was afraid if he didn’t reach her quickly, the weight of her water-laden skirts and coat would pull her under.
As he cut through the water with swift, knifelike strokes, he was thankful that swimming in a lake had been a regular part of his summer activities while growing up. The steamboat continued on down the river, its huge bulk turned almost at a right angle to the shoreline. It must have hit a submerged sandbar, one big and solid enough to knock the steamboat sideways in the river. The captain would gradually right the boat and probably dock at the next town to check for damage. Only then would anyone discover they had lost two passengers.
In the meantime, Cole and Drew were alone in the river.
Cole had managed to shed his coat and kick off his shoes. He needed to get rid of his clothes, but he had to reach Drew quickly. He didn’t know how long she could stay afloat. Any air trapped in her skirt and coat would help keep her afloat only for a few seconds. Once they were wet through, they’d pull her down like lead weights.
“I can’t keep myself up,” Drew called when he drew near her.
Cole reached out, caught her hand. “You’ve got to get rid of those clothes,” he said.
They struggled in the water, performing acrobatics neither had probably performed before, but the waterlogged material of her coat clung to her dress as though they had been sewn together.
“Now your skirts,” Cole said, when Drew finally managed to free herself of the coat.
“I can’t without letting go.”
“Can you keep yourself afloat for a few minutes?”
“I think so.”
“I’ll dive behind you and undo the buttons.”
Cole had never realized how much he depended on his eyes to do even the simplest task. It took three dives to find and undo all the buttons on Drew’s skirt and petticoats. When he resurfaced, she looked exhausted.
“I can’t swim to the shore,” she told him. “It’s too far away.”
“I’m not leaving you.”
“There’s no reason for both of us to drown.”
“We’re not going to drown. I’m a strong swimmer.”
“The shore looks at least a mile away. Have you ever swum that far before?”
“Lots of times.” He hadn’t, but he figured this was one lie worth telling. “Relax and let me get a grip under your chin. No matter what happens, stay relaxed and don’t fight me.”
Cole secured a hold on Drew and started toward the shore, which seemed to be farther away than the last time he looked. He told himself to relax. He had a long way to go. It was crucial that he not expend all of his energy now. B
oth their lives depended on it.
Cole let the river carry him along. He hoped the current would transport them to a place where the river narrowed, but they were caught in one of those enormous, shallow elbows the Mississippi makes so often when it spreads out for miles before narrowing down into a deeper channel.
It soon became clear that his strength would be exhausted before they could reach the shore. He hoped for a sandbar, but though most of the river was too shallow for steamboats, it was too deep for his feet to touch bottom. Looking around for any possible help, trying to stem the feeling of desperation rising inside him, Cole spied the dark shadow of something floating in the river.
The trunk of an uprooted tree. He had to reach it before the current carried it past. It was their only hope.
Cole sighted a line where he hoped their paths would intersect. Then, summoning his remaining strength, he swam toward the path of the tree trunk. He was able to take hold of an outstretched limb before the log swept past them.
“Grab hold and don’t let go,” he told Drew.
She didn’t waste energy talking. She hooked her arm over the log and held on.
“We have to swim this log out of the main current,” Cole said. “Then we can get it to shore. Otherwise, we’ll just be swept down the river. Hold on and kick.”
For a time Cole feared their efforts would prove futile. The current, steady and strong, swept them along. Cole’s muscles burned with pain. His lungs felt ready to burst, but he couldn’t let up. Safety for him and Drew lay on the distant shore. He refused to let himself think of failure. That was not an option. He couldn’t have found the woman he loved only to lose her.
“We’re not getting any closer,” Drew said.
“We’re coming to a curve in the river,” Cole said. “The current will push us toward the edge of the channel. When I tell you, paddle and kick for all you’re worth.” He didn’t tell her this was their last chance. Only their constant swimming had kept their bodies from succumbing to the cold. But they couldn’t last forever. If they didn’t get out of the water soon, the river would win.
Cole waited, judging the strength of the current, the arc of the curve, guessing at the energy they had left. They would get only one chance.
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