Marooned with a Marine
Page 10
Haunting him with those eyes of hers and the memories of the few short days they’d had together in the most unlikely of romantic hideaways.
Now, as he stood outside the real estate office where she worked, he tried to remember the plan.
Friends.
“Hell,” he muttered, gazing up at the sign that read Magnolia Realty, “what was I thinking? How am I supposed to pretend she’s my buddy?”
“Gunny?”
Sam spun around to face Staff Sergeant Bill Cooper and his very pregnant wife, Joanne, as they hurried toward him.
“Sorry we’re late, Sam,” she said, laying one hand on the mound of her stomach, “but Bill had to stop for me twice on the way here.” She shrugged narrow shoulders, tossed her long red hair behind her back and admitted, “The further along I get, the more I wish we could just hook up a bathroom to the back of the car and drag it along with us. It’s like this every time.”
That was a bit more than Sam wanted to know, but he shook his head and gave Bill an envious smile. Joanne Cooper was so obviously happy, both with her husband and their soon-to-be-born third child, it was hard not to resent the other man for being so damn lucky.
“We appreciate you taking the time to introduce us to your friend,” Bill was saying. “There’re so many real estate agents around here, it’s hard to know who to go with.”
“You’ll like Karen,” he assured them. “She’s honest and easy to talk to.” He knew he should feel slightly guilty about this. After all, he wasn’t introducing the Coopers to Karen purely out of the goodness of his heart. He had an ulterior motive as well.
The minute Bill had told him that he and Joanne wanted to buy a house for their rapidly expanding family, Sam had leaped at the opportunity. What better way to show Karen that most Marine spouses were happy with their life than to dangle Joanne Cooper in front of her. The tiny redhead with the enormous belly was perfect for this little demonstration. She was so clearly nuts about Bill and so excited about the kids, some of that was bound to rub off on Karen.
“So,” he said, rubbing his palms together, “you guys ready?”
“Let’s get this show on the road,” Joanne said with a grin. “Before I have to go again.”
“Jeez, Joanne.”
She reached up and kissed Bill on the cheek. “Lighten up, Sarge,” she told him, and got a quick hug in return.
Sam’s back teeth ground together as he tried to ignore the sudden swift stab of pain that hit him as he watched his friends. Joanne’s words had sounded so much like something Karen would say, he was hard put to keep the damn smile on his face. Envy, he thought. Pure and simple envy.
“C’mon,” he said, leading the way. “Let’s go in.”
Karen watched the three people approach, and from right behind her, she heard her boss whisper, “Why, sugar, isn’t that Sam?”
“Yep,” Karen said, and took advantage of the fact that he couldn’t see her to take a moment to truly appreciate just looking at him. Three days had never seemed so long before.
She’d been jumping every time the phone rang. Hurrying to the door at every imagined knock. And pulling back the living room curtains to look whenever she heard the roar of a powerful engine. All to no avail, she thought grimly. He hadn’t called, hadn’t come by to check her roof, hadn’t even driven past her house to make faces at her.
There’d been nothing. No contact at all until this morning, when he’d called to tell her about the Coopers and what they were looking for in a house. And a part of her ached for the loss of him. She spent all night every night, tossing and turning in a too-empty bed, chasing after dream images of him. And every day, she tried to convince herself that it was better this way. That “friends” didn’t have a claim on each other’s time. That the longer she went without seeing him, the easier it would get.
But even she wasn’t believing her.
“My goodness,” Geri Summerville said on a breathy whisper, “that man just gets better lookin’, I swear.”
“Yeah,” Karen said, disgusted. “I know.” Heck, she thought, when he’s sixty, he’ll probably still be turning women’s heads.
“I never did understand why you broke it off with him, honey,” Geri told her, and clucked her tongue. “Seems a damn shame to me, wasting a fine specimen of a man like that one.”
“He’s not going to waste,” Karen assured her as she shot the other woman a quick look.
Geri patted both hands against the sides of her head in an unnecessary attempt to smooth her silver hair that had already been hairsprayed stiff enough to stop a bullet. “Honey,” the woman said with a slow smile, “if he’s not with you, then it’s a waste.”
“Pull your hormones under control,” Karen whispered as Sam yanked the door open and let the very pregnant woman enter before him.
“I’m too old to have hormones, hon,” Geri whispered, giving her a nudge, “but my eyes work fine.” Then, straightening up, she gave the three people a welcoming smile and hurried across the room. “Come on in,” she said, her soft southern accent giving her invitation an even warmer tone. Taking the woman by the arm, she guided her to a chair in front of Karen’s desk. “You just sit here, honey.”
“Thank you.”
But Geri, Karen saw, had already turned her attention on Sam. “It’s been a while, Sam. How’ve you been?”
“Well, thanks,” he said, and shook her hand. “It’s good to see you again, too, ma’am.”
Geri shot an interested glance between Karen and him, then, giving a low whistle, she said, “I’ll leave you all to get down to business,” then fluttered off to her desk on the opposite side of the room.
Karen’s gaze locked with Sam’s, and for one heart-stopping moment, it was as if they were completely alone in the room. But then reality reared its ugly head and Sam broke eye contact first.
“Karen,” he said, waving one hand at the couple opposite her, “this is Staff Sergeant Bill Cooper and his wife, Joanne. Guys, this is my friend Karen Beckett.”
She flicked him a quick glance to try to read the expression on his face when he said the word friend, but his features were carefully blank. Darn it.
After a few minutes of general chitchat, Joanne scooted forward to the edge of her chair, rested her elbows on Karen’s desk and asked, “So, were you able to find anything that comes close to our price range?”
“I found a few,” Karen said, reaching for the photos she’d pulled after receiving Sam’s call. Spreading them out on the desk, she let the woman go through them while the men talked.
“I like this one,” the tiny redhead said, picking out the house Karen herself liked best. “Can we go see it?”
“Sure,” she said, “but wouldn’t you rather go over these with your husband first?”
Joanne waved one hand and chuckled. “He’d live in a tent and wouldn’t notice the lack of walls,” she said. “If it isn’t Marine Green, he doesn’t even see it.”
Hmm. Karen’s glance slid toward Sam.
“Honestly, Karen—” she paused “—it’s all right to call you Karen?”
“Of course.”
The other woman smiled at her. “Anyway, I told Bill I wanted to buy a house and he can’t understand why since we’ll be transferred in another year or so, anyway. But I like the idea of knowing we have a home somewhere waiting for us.” She paused to give her stomach a pat. “Besides, with number three about to launch, we’re running out of room at the house on base.”
“That’s understandable,” Karen said.
“I thought so. Besides, we can rent the place out to other Marine families while we’re gone.”
Karen leaned forward and flicked a quick look at Sam to make sure he wasn’t listening. “Do you always go with him?” she asked.
“Except when he’s deployed. Then he’s off for six months with just the guys.” Joanne flicked her husband a quick glance. “Actually, this is the first baby he’ll be here to see born.”
“You’r
e kidding.”
“Nope. But we’re at Parris Island now and there’re no deployments from this base. This time, Bill will be here.” She grinned. “And I’m not real sure if he’s happy about that or not.”
Admiration colored her gaze as Karen stared at the other woman. She’d given birth to two children on her own while her husband was off God knew where. Yet it didn’t seem to have bothered her in the least.
“You’re amazing,” she said before she could stop herself.
Joanne pulled her head back, looked at her quizzically and said, “Thanks. But why?”
“Alone? Giving birth while your husband’s thousands of miles away?” She shook her head. “I don’t know if I could do that.”
The other woman laughed shortly and looked at the men to make sure they weren’t paying attention, then turned her gaze back to Karen. “Honey, no wife’s alone on base. We have the other wives to lean on when we need to. Besides, I probably talk to Bill more when he’s deployed than I do when he’s home.”
“What?”
“Oh, sure.” The woman waved one hand. “The phone bill’s outrageous, but since we got e-mail… we talk every day.”
“But the separations must be hard on you.” Though even as she said it, Karen wondered if they would be for someone like her. After all, she lived alone now. What would be the difference? Except of course for missing Sam. Which she already did.
And why was she even thinking like this? She didn’t want to marry him. Didn’t want to be a Marine wife.
Joanne laughed. “Not really. What’s hard is when he comes home all gung ho and full of himself. It always takes a month or so for him to remember that I don’t take orders. Inside our house, I’m the one in charge.” She paused and smiled to herself as if recalling something especially wonderful. “But, oh my, that first week or so he’s back…” Joanne sighed. “Better than our honeymoon.”
“I can imagine,” Karen said wistfully, and she could. After all, look at what had happened between Sam and her at the motel, and they’d only been apart two months. After a six-month absence, they’d probably kill each other.
“It’s like falling in love all over again,” Joanne said, rubbing her hand across her belly, “except with the kids around, which keeps reality close. Actually, that’s how Junior here got his start. A welcome-home party.”
Karen watched the woman lovingly stroke her swollen abdomen for a long minute and felt a wave of envy wash over her. Joanne looked so happy. And apparently, any fears she had for her husband’s safety weren’t enough to keep her from enjoying the life she’d chosen.
And Karen couldn’t help wondering if she could be as strong. Or would her fears conquer her so completely that she’d never have the husband and children she’d always wanted?
Pushing that disturbing thought aside for the moment, she stood up and said briskly, “Shall we go look at that house?”
“You bet,” Joanne said as she pushed herself up from the chair. “But before we go,” she added, leaning in to whisper, “do you have a bathroom here?”
Eleven
Karen followed Joanne from room to room in the vacant house, listening as the other woman made plans and talked about which piece of furniture would fit where. And as she rhapsodized over what she pictured as the baby’s room, Karen silently admitted that this was why she loved her job. This is why she enjoyed selling real estate. Because she wasn’t just selling houses.
She was helping people find homes.
And a part of her wondered if she’d ever have that. Not just a place she loved—but a home that held love and laughter and warmth. A place where fear didn’t exist. Where a family lived and loved. Karen’s gaze slid toward the French doors, beyond which lay the backyard. Bill and Sam wandered across the grass, picking up branches fallen from the trees lining the property, then moving off toward the toolshed.
“One thing you’ve got to say for the Corps,” Joanne said as she came up behind her, “they build good-looking men.”
“Uh-huh,” Karen murmured as her gaze drifted across Sam’s broad back, muscular arms, slim hips and denim-covered behind.
“Great, isn’t he?” Joanne asked.
“Yeah,” she said, smiling to herself as Sam laughed at something Bill said.
“But you’re just friends, huh?”
Apparently, their little act hadn’t fooled Joanne. But then, Karen thought, why would it? It wasn’t true, any of it. They were far more than friends, no matter what Sam wanted to pretend.
So instead of answering a question that didn’t require one, she turned her gaze on the other woman and asked a question of her own. “How do you deal with it?”
Surprised, Joanne looked at her. “Deal with what?”
“The risks of Bill’s job—the worry…the fear.”
The shorter woman rubbed her belly with the flat of one hand as if soothing the child within. “I don’t think about it.”
Amazed, she blurted, “How can you not?”
Shaking her head, Joanne paused for a moment as if searching for the right words, then asked, “Would my worrying keep him safer? Or would my fears distract him enough so that he might get killed?”
Karen hadn’t thought of it like that, and now that she had, she couldn’t help wondering if perhaps worry over her had distracted Dave. She remembered all the times she’d shut him out when he’d wanted to talk about his job. She recalled clearly the concern in his eyes when he tried to find out what was bothering her. And she hadn’t told him. Had thought she’d hidden her fears.
“The way I see it,” Joanne continued in a thoughtful tone, “he’s probably safer than most people.”
When Karen opened her mouth to argue that point, Joanne spoke up quickly to cut her off.
“I mean, sure he has a risky job. But he’s trained to deal with it.”
“But—”
“How many people die on the highway every day, while driving to their nice, safe jobs?”
“Sure, but—”
Joanne was on a roll, though, and kept talking, as if the words hadn’t been far from her mind all along. “There are no guarantees. He could be a schoolteacher, step off the curb and get hit by a bus.”
“Of course,” Karen said, accepting the logic of it, “still, though—”
“And he wouldn’t have been happy,” Joanne finished as she turned her head to look at her husband, now exploring the unlocked toolshed. “Being a Marine isn’t what he does,” she added, “it’s who he is.”
The words hit Karen with a slap of familiarity. Sam had said the same thing to her just last week about himself. And who was she? she wondered. A woman too afraid of dying to risk living? Too afraid of losing love to risk finding it again? That thought stung.
She inhaled sharply and shifted her gaze from Joanne to the dark-haired man standing just beyond the French doors. She’d always considered herself a strong person. Had she just been fooling herself all these years? Had she allowed Dave’s death to become an excuse for hiding from life?
Would she continue to hide until finally she ended up an old woman with more regrets than fond memories?
“It’s like your job,” Joanne said abruptly, startling Karen out of her thoughts.
“What?”
“You enjoy doing what you do, don’t you?”
“Yes, but—”
“Wouldn’t you fight if someone told you you couldn’t do it anymore?”
“Of course I would,” she argued, “but it’s not really the same thing, is it?”
“No, it’s not.” Joanne laid one hand on Karen’s arm. “But it’s what you do, isn’t it? It’s important to you. Part of who you are.”
“Yeah,” she said, staring at Sam through the glass, “it is.”
“Same with them,” Joanne said quietly. “Only their job is to protect all of us. They even protect the people who don’t approve of what they do.”
A flush of embarrassment rushed through Karen, and she knew without looking tha
t her cheeks were red. Joanne’s simply said words had hit her hard. She hadn’t meant to insult the woman and she spoke up quickly to say so. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“You didn’t.”
Looking into her eyes, Karen saw she meant it and that lifted a bit of her guilt. She liked Joanne Cooper. She was strong and honest and upbeat. The kind of woman Karen would like to have for a friend.
“It’s just that—”
“You worry.”
“Yes.”
“Maybe too much,” Joanne said lightly. “Sometimes, if you’re too busy worrying, you forget to live.” She turned her head to look at her husband, just sticking his head out of the toolshed with a dirt-smeared grin on his face. Smiling, Joanne said, “I think I enjoy my time with Bill more than a civilian wife would simply because I know the risks. So I’m more determined than ever to enjoy what I have while I have it.”
“That’s a good attitude,” Karen said.
“It’s not too hard to develop,” Joanne told her. “If you want to badly enough.”
“Maybe,” Karen whispered, her gaze locked on Sam.
“I won’t kid you,” Joanne said. “Sometimes it’s not easy. A Marine spouse has to be independent. Strong. Willing to be mother and father for months at a time. She has to take care of the house and sometimes that means handling a cross-country move alone.”
Karen nodded. None of that scared her. That she could handle. It was the fear of losing Sam that brought her to her knees.
“I’ve seen plenty of military marriages fall apart,” Joanne said quietly. “Most, for the normal everyday reasons some marriages die. But a lot of them failed because the wives couldn’t take being alone. A professional Marine…a Lifer…doesn’t need a wimp at his—or her side. They need partners. Equals. If you’re not up to it—” she paused and waited until Karen looked her in the eye “—stay friends. Anything else would hurt you both too much.”