by Mari Carr
“I can’t stand to lose someone again, Jamie. When Drew died, I felt like he’d taken a huge part of me with him. For months, I struggled to keep my head above the water, afraid I was going to drown in a sea of despair. I couldn’t go down because of Maddie. She needed me.”
“You’ve been using Maddie as an excuse to protect your heart, to avoid relationships—all these years.” There was no question in his voice.
“I don’t think I’ve been consciously doing that and definitely not the whole time, but yeah, the last couple of years, I think maybe I have been using my daughter as an excuse. I put Maddie and myself in a safe little bubble to protect us. To make sure we never experienced the pain we felt when Drew was taken from us.”
“I can understand that pain, angel. I was devastated when Maura left. I’d honestly planned spending the rest of my life with her. She ripped out my heart when she walked out the door.”
Grace nodded. “I know.”
“I’m not letting the fear of feeling that pain again stop me, stop us.” Jamie’s face was determined, resolute. She let the strength of his convictions seep into her soul. If he was brave enough to try again, she could be too.
“I love you, Grace.”
Tears sprang to her eyes. “I love you, too.”
He stepped forward and she fell into his embrace. Wrapped her arms around his waist and pressed her cheek to his chest, listening to the wondrous sound of his beating heart. She was finished hiding her feelings—from him, from Maddie, from herself.
“You aren’t the only one who’s loved and lost, angel.”
She nodded, recalling the months of pain he suffered after Maura left him. “I know that and I’m sorry. I’m sorry for hiding from you this week. For risking losing this.”
Jamie kissed her. It was a hard, long, deep kiss that showed her just how much he’d missed her this week. She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave herself up to it, to him.
“Mom.”
Grace jumped away from Jamie quickly. “Maddie.” Her daughter was looking at her with confused eyes and Grace fought to still her shaking hands. “I thought you were catching a ride home with Jessica.”
“Her car won’t start. She’s waiting for her dad to come look at it. I told her I’d just ride with you.” Maddie looked from her to Jamie. “What’s going on?”
“I can explain,” Grace started, her throat suddenly dry with nervousness.
“Were you two just kissing?”
Grace could see Jamie nodding from the corner of her eyes and she fought against closing her eyes and groaning. She’d had all week to tell her daughter about her new relationship. Now, the truth had been revealed in an all-too-clear, far-too-abrupt fashion.
“Are you guys dating?”
Grace tried to read her daughter’s face, her expressions, but her mind moved too sluggishly to comprehend anything other than the fact she’d just gotten caught making out with her daughter’s softball coach in the back of her classroom.
“We, I mean, I, it’s just that—” Grace stumbled to find the right words.
Jamie, of course, knew the right one. “Yes.”
“Awesome,” Maddie said. “Seriously freaking awesome.” Her face broke into a huge grin as she rushed over to them. She high-fived Jamie, then turned, grabbing Grace up in a tight, unexpected hug.
“It is?” Grace asked weakly. “I mean, you don’t mind?”
“Mind? Are you nuts? Why would you think that?”
Grace shrugged. “The last time I dated—”
Maddie frowned and interrupted her. “Last time? You’ve never dated anybody.”
“That’s not true.” Grace put her hands on her hips. “Don’t you remember Bill? When you were in eighth grade?”
Maddie rolled her eyes and Grace tried not to grin at how much her daughter’s expression reminded her of herself. “When I was in eighth grade? Um, yeah, Mom. I sort of remember boring Bill. How long did that last? Like ten minutes?”
“We went on several dates and you made your feelings about him and the fact I was being unfaithful to your father perfectly clear.”
Maddie sucked in a deep breath and Grace cursed her stupid words. “Is that why you’ve never dated?” Maddie’s voice filled with hurt. “Because of me?”
Grace shook her head quickly. “Absolutely not. I didn’t mean what I said to sound that way.”
Jamie stepped forward. “Your mom was pretty messed up after your dad died, Mad. I think it’s just taken her awhile to get her sea legs again.”
Maddie seemed relieved and Grace was grateful for his interference. “I was devastated when your dad died. I don’t know how well you remember those days right after the car accident, but it was months before I felt like I could make it through a day without hovering on the verge of tears. By the time I pulled myself together, we’d established a routine. Our lives were stable and even happy. I convinced myself that was enough.”
“But it wasn’t?” Maddie asked.
Grace grasped her daughter’s shoulders, pulled her closer and looked her in the face. “It was enough. I cherish each and every day you and I’ve spent together. And I’m going to miss you so much when you leave for college.”
Maddie grinned. “So you and Coach?”
Jamie laughed. “You know, Mad, maybe when we’re not in school, you should consider calling me Jamie. Might be a little weird to call your mom’s boyfriend Coach.”
Maddie put her hands on her hips and studied Jamie with very new eyes. “Well, Jamie,” she said, her voice exaggerating his name, “I can tell you right now, you better not be messing with my mom. I have a wicked curve ball and I’d have no problem directing it at your head if you even thought of hurting her.”
“Maddie,” Grace chastised, but her comment was drowned out by Jamie’s loud hooting laughter.
Grace narrowed her eyes as she turned to see him doubled over with laughter. “What is so funny?”
“She not only looks like you, she is you. Jesus, it’s like you have your own personal mini-me.”
Grace looked over at her daughter before glancing at herself. They were both standing with their hands on their hips, haughty expressions on their faces. In unison, they rolled their eyes and gave in to their own laughter.
After several moments, Grace composed herself enough to speak again. “Maddie, you’re sure you’re okay with this?”
Maddie nodded. “I’ve been so worried about leaving, Mom. Leaving you here alone. Coach—I mean Jamie and you are perfect for each other. I always thought so, but you seemed to think he was too young for you.”
“You don’t think—”
Maddie shook her head emphatically. “Heck no, but I have a feeling every girl in the senior class is gonna hate you from now on. I mean Mr. Fisher is one of the hottest teachers in school.”
Jamie wrapped his arm around Grace, giving her a squeeze. “Hear that, Grace? I’m hot. Told you so.”
She elbowed him in the stomach as Maddie giggled.
“What do you say I take you two gals out for dinner and to a movie?” Jamie suggested.
“Sounds awesome,” Maddie replied. “Can I pick the movie?”
Jamie pondered her request. “Will I like your choice?”
“No way. Chick flick.”
He sighed, though Grace could detect a glimmer of humor in his eye. “What do you say to a challenge? Winner picks movie.”
Maddie’s interest was sparked. She’d clearly gotten her competitiveness from her father. “What kind of challenge?”
“Race you to the car?”
Maddie appeared to think about it before turning and racing toward the classroom door. “Deal,” she yelled over her shoulder.
“Cheater,” Jamie called out, turning back to Grace. “I love you,” he said, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. He took off and she laughed as he yelled back to her, “Meet you at the car.”
Grace bowed her head, laughing to herself. Gathering up her stuff, she turned
off the lights and locked the door. Life just suddenly got a lot more exciting—and a lot less lonely.
Epilogue
Grace laughed at Cheryl’s comment about one of their school’s more colorful students as Jamie ordered another round. They were back at Tully’s, mourning the end of another summer. They’d survived the first week of the new school year and she had dropped Maddie off at college the weekend before. To say she needed this happy hour was putting it lightly. Empty nest syndrome had hit her like a freight train and it was taking all the strength in her body not to get in her car and go fetch her daughter home.
The only thing that had gotten her through the week was Jamie. They’d dated for nearly four months and every day simply got better. He’d spent a great deal of time with her and Maddie this summer, but he’d also left them plenty of time alone—knowing that once Maddie left for college, things would be different.
She’d felt like a teenager sneaking around for sex, but she simply couldn’t bring herself to sleep away from home while Maddie was still there, despite the fact her daughter was old enough to know all about the birds and the bees. She also wasn’t comfortable with him spending the night at her house, so they’d had to improvise. Grabbing a few stolen moments whenever they could. Even with their hit-and-run bedroom sessions, she wasn’t sure she’d ever had so much incredible sex in her life. It was unbelievable how much the man could shove into a half hour here and there.
Jamie looked at her, then bent to kiss her.
Trey groaned. “Jesus. If I’d known you two would be so disgustingly happy when I set you up, I don’t think I would have bothered.”
Grace frowned. “You didn’t set us up.”
Trey winked at her, his face smug and she recalled the night they’d spent together months earlier. He’d had the same self-satisfied look that night too.
He must have seen the understanding dawn in her eyes and he leaned closer, whispering his next comment for her ears only. “You two were meant for each other. You just needed a little push in the right direction.”
She turned her head discreetly and pressed a quick kiss on his cheek. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure,” he replied, his words proving exactly what kind of pleasure he meant and she laughed.
“Hey. Our song,” Jamie teased when she heard the jukebox play the beginning strains of “Endless Love”.
She feigned a shudder. “Ugh. Hate to break it to you, Jamie, but I’m not drunk enough to sing yet.”
“Then dance with me.” He grasped her hand and pulled her to the small dance floor, wrapping her in his strong embrace. She wondered if the magic of being held by him would ever wear off. He hummed in her ear and she grinned, pulling back to look at him.
“How old were you when this song came out?”
He shrugged. “No idea. Probably in the cradle. My mom used to sing it to me when I was little. It was her favorite song for a while. My dad still teases her about it.”
“That’s nice.”
He bent down and nuzzled his face against hers. They danced in silence for a few moments. The song was nearly over when he shocked her by pulling away and dropping to one knee.
“Jamie?” The conversation at the surrounding tables slowly died when he took her hand.
“I love you, Grace Wright.”
Her heart sped up at his formal tone. Holy shit, he was proposing to her. Right in the middle of Tully’s at happy hour. In front of God and everybody. She was stunned and thrilled.
“You’re beautiful, kind, generous and funny. But I don’t want to spend any more happy hours with you. From now on, I only want happy years. A happy lifetime. Will you marry me, Grace?”
She blinked rapidly, fighting to stop the tears suddenly flowing down her cheeks. She nodded, swallowing hard, trying to find her voice. “Yes. I’ll marry you.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring, placing it on her finger. A loud cheer went up from their table of friends and as he rose, they were surrounded by The Cougar Club slapping Jamie on the back while Cheryl hugged her, the two of them laughing through tears.
“Gotta warn you, Gracie,” Trey said, coming over to kiss her on the cheek, “this sort of means a bachelor party in Vegas.”
She laughed, offering Trey a friendly hug. “I’ve heard all about your twisted stag party plans, so I’m warning you now—don’t lose my fiancé in Nevada or I’ll hurt you.”
Jamie came over, grinning widely as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. “Even if he did lose me,” he said, his lips brushing her ear, “I’d always find my way back to you. I love you, Grace.”
About the Author
Writing a book was number one on Mari Carr’s bucket list and on her thirty-fourth birthday, she set out to see that goal achieved. Now her computer is jammed full of stories—novels, novellas, short stories and dead-ends and many of her books have been published. A winner of the Passionate Plume, Mari found time for writing by squeezing it into the hours between 3 a.m. and daybreak when her family is asleep and the house is quiet.
To learn more about Mari Carr, please visit www.maricarr.com or join her Yahoo! group to join in the fun with other readers as well as Mari Carr: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Heat_Wave_Readers/join
Look for these titles by Mari Carr
Now Available:
Erotic Research
Tequila Truth
Because of You
Rough Cut
Learning Curves
Coming Soon:
Power Play
When the screen fades to black, all that remains is love.
Rough Cut
© 2010 Mari Carr
A Black & White Collection Story
Ty Ransome. Reigning king of Hollywood, producer, actor, Look Magazine’s Hottest Man Alive. He has it all—until he reads a book of short stories that touches him in places kept carefully hidden from the tabloid gossip mill. There’s only one way to meet the introverted writer—invite her to Tinseltown to work on a script. The moment he sees her, he realizes why her work haunts him. There’s something missing in his life, and it’s her.
Gwen steps off the plane with reservations. For one thing, her darkly sexual stories are hardly movie material. Then there’s Ty’s reputation as a ladies’ man. Yet she’s won over by his charm and agrees to stay on for a week to get to know him before making her decision. And as the days go by, she discovers there’s far more to Ty than a handsome face.
They eat, drink and breathe the characters in their screenplay, re-enacting scenes that delve into the BDSM realm, setting Ty free to unleash his powerful cravings and exposing Gwen’s deepest needs. Needs she set free on paper…but is not sure she’s ready to make a reality.
Warning: This title contains all the following Tinseltown essentials: explicit sex on a movie set, anal play in a mansion, BDSM with a hot movie star, capture fantasies while writing a screenplay, bondage in a limo, and, oh yeah, some graphic language—sorry about that.
Enjoy the following excerpt for Rough Cut
“Now this is the way I like to wake up,” a deep voice said beside her.
Gwen opened her eyes, briefly surprised to find her face only inches away from Ty’s. She blinked a few times to make sure she wasn’t dreaming, then their nighttime conversation drifted back through her consciousness.
“You were supposed to stay on your own side.” Her voice was gruff with sleep. As she came fully awake, she became aware of his hand lightly rubbing a bare bit of skin at her waist, beneath her T-shirt.
“So sue me.” He leaned so close to her the only air she could feel was that of his soft breath on her cheek. His hand stopped caressing her waist and instead gripped it, pulling her even closer to him.
“I don’t think this is a good idea,” she whispered, despite the fact her hands were resting, unresisting, on his chest. She’d placed them there to push him away, but instead the traitorous things were exploring the rock-hard definitions of his pecs.
“I think a kiss in the morning is always a good idea.”
“Just a kiss?” She cursed her sudden breathlessness.
“Just a kiss, Gwen.” She was shocked by her disappointment until he added, “for now.”
His lips brushed hers and her body shuddered at the impact. His mouth wasn’t gentle, it wasn’t easy. He took her lips with a roughness that proclaimed his possession. He took everything she offered with her lips and tongue and demanded more. His hands drifted up to her face, engulfing her cheeks in his firm grip, turning her head exactly the way he wanted it. His teeth nipped at her lower lip and she thought for a moment she heard him growl before his tongue plunged into her mouth, tangling with hers. She’d never been kissed like this in her life and the feeling was heady. It made her dizzy, giddy, reckless and she suddenly realized she wanted more. Hell, she wanted all.
She reached up and held his face to hers, twisting her fingers in his hair. He mimicked the action with her own long tresses and she was amazed by her reaction to his rough touch. Each time he pulled her hair, the sensation of pain flowed pleasurably down her body, causing her hips to flex, searching for relief. Her body felt as if he’d set it aflame and she found her reactions shockingly animalistic.
“Harder. Pull harder,” she begged and he responded in turn. His lips trailed along her face, his rough beard scratching her sensitive skin until he reached her ear. He bit her earlobe, pulling her hair at the same time and she cried out, her hips gyrating wildly.
His hard body came over hers as he took control of her wrists, dragging them above her head and holding them firmly in place with one of his hands. She sensed he knew what his actions were doing to her as he pressed his covered cock firmly between her legs, letting her feel the proof of the desire they shared. She wanted to scream at him to take off his pants and give her what she needed, but instinctively she knew he would refuse her.
“Shhh.” He tightened his grip on her wrists while planting soft, sweet kisses on her face. “Calm down, gorgeous.”
