by C. M. Lally
I get home and notice that I’ve missed a text from my sister. She’s inviting me for dinner on Wednesday, no doubt to try to fix the issues between my father and I. I might as well concede; she won’t stop trying until I give in. I know her that well; she’s stubborn. I quickly text her back.
N: Only on one condition.
A: Yeah, what’s that?
N: You make my favorite.
A: What did you think I planned on making? See you at 6. Bring alcohol, we’re going to need it.
My problems with my father are monumental. I don’t know how to get him to see that I’ve paid for my mistakes. I know he misses my mother. We all do. Why doesn’t he miss me? We’ve always been really close. We couldn’t have gotten any closer without being each other. My parents could always read my mind. Hell, sometimes I can read Aran’s mind. How does a father walk away from a child that’s hurt? From a family that’s hurting? He taught me the rules of team and teamwork. Why do they not apply to him and our team?
I’ve got to move forward in my life and fix everything that’s wrong, or at least attempt to. I’ve laid down long enough. Bullshit on ‘good things come to those who wait’. Great things come to those that go after what they want. I wasn’t raised to be a quitter. I see my Dad quitting, and every bone in my body wants to scream at him not to roll over and die, too. I’m sitting down with him on Wednesday night and we’re going to hash this shit out. It’s time to either be a part of team Bailey, or be cut from it.
I shower and get ready for bed, but I don’t feel like sleeping yet. I lounge around in the living room, flipping channels and end up settling on ESPN. I watch Matt Millen analyze the free agency and draft picks obtained by the Raiders for the upcoming season. Damn if I couldn’t do that; I could analyze stats, do play-by-play analysis, and sideline reporting. He’s comparing their current QB draft pick to me. He’s got the stats graph up and we could go head to head with those numbers. Same college pass completion rate, touchdowns scored, interceptions; hell, he could be me. I bet he doesn’t end up calling out a bad play, getting injured and ending his career. I’m the only lucky asshole that could happen to. I would love to know what motherfucker put that play call in my ear.
I sit and let the hatred for the Raiders Administration consume me for a while. The injury wasn’t their fault, but the play call was. The QB coach was supposed to be calling plays in my ear piece, but the last play I heard was from a voice I didn’t recognize. Then the snap clock ran out and the ear mic went silent.
Someone changed the play at the last minute, calling for the 3D bubble screen, but we didn’t have enough eligible receivers on the field. So, I went for a play-action pass. The linemen got confused, and I went down with my arm shredded like spaghetti.
No one has ever asked me what happened, except coach. He didn’t hear the call, and the organization let the public mutilate me. Coach didn’t fight for me, and eventually got fired himself. I lost my job.
It’s partly my fault. I’ve been asked repeatedly for interviews, but have declined them all. I didn’t want to talk about it, especially after my mother passed away.
Hate still consumes me. I blame them, but the next interview request is being granted. I’m moving forward.
I lie here, and I can smell Jenna’s scent on the throw blanket. Maybe I should check on Zeus. I did leave without petting him or even saying goodbye in my hasty attempt to control my lust. I unlock my phone screen and pull her up in contacts. I press dial and hear it ring a few times, praying it doesn’t go to voice mail.
“Hey!” she says excitedly. I hear barking in the background.
“Zeus is barking. Is everything okay?”
“Oh, yes! We were just playing tug-o-war with the chew rope and I left him mid-pull to answer the phone. He’s pouting and showing his displeasure by being loud. Apparently I broke a play rule.”
“Well, there are play rules. One never leaves the opponent hanging mid-pull to answer the phone. It’s kind of like jumping off the teeter-totter mid-rise and allowing the other person to crash to the ground,” I tease her.
“Well, next time, could you write these rules down, so I know exactly how to play without penalty flags flying? I think I just lost 15 yards.”
“Oh no. That particular penalty is ‘unsportsmanlike conduct’ and got you suspended from the game with a hefty fine. But that’s okay. You can talk to me now.”
Chapter 11
Jenna
My phone rings and the loudness of it makes me jump. I guess I am more nervous being here alone than I thought. I look over at my screen and see it’s Nick calling. I drop the rope that Zeus was tugging on, only to receive a few lows growls and a pawing from him. Oh great. Now he’s barking at me.
“Shhh, Zeus. Daddy’s calling.” I swipe across the screen to answer quickly before it goes to voicemail.
“Hey!”
“Hey! Are you snuggled up in bed with your PJs on?”
“Zeus and I are, yes, but I don’t have my PJs on. We have secured ourselves. Even the bedroom door is locked.”
“Good. I can’t stand the thought of anything happening to you. I’m going to take care of this mess for you. I promise.”
“You don’t need to take care of this. I’ll handle it and I’ll handle Luke. He’s my problem to deal with.”
“I don’t want you near him. If he can do that much damage in that little bit of time to a car and apartment, then he could really hurt you, even kill you, if pissed off enough. I need to know you’re safe without me.”
“I’m not going to meet with him. I’m calling him on the phone and ending it. I’m not putting up with his bullshit any more. I will be free to do whatever I want. Soon; like tomorrow. And if you’re so worried about me without you, then you should be here.”
“Do you want me there?” He asks in a tired, deep-timbre voice. His tone is throaty and suggestive. My body temperature just went to volcanic and my panties are soaked through. I’m not sure what he wants me to say, but my dirty mind just nose-dives into the gutter.
“Enough that I’m standing up now to remove my panties.”
I throw the covers off me and step out of bed. Hooking my fingers through the hip-hugger straps of my panties, they drop to the floor. I kick them towards the dirty basket and lift them in with my bright red toes. I’ll simply go without. I pull his T-shirt that I wore to breakfast back on.
Through the phone, I here keys jangling and the dinging sound of an open car door in the background. I wait breathlessly for a few seconds and am rewarded when I hear an engine start, and soft radio music playing in the background. I guess I did my part. “See you soon,” I casually say before I hang up.
I unlock the bedroom door and glide toward the front door. Within a few minutes, headlights dance up my living room wall.
I open the front door slightly and watch him slide out of his truck. His face lifts towards mine as he approaches the door. The dimmed light of my living room catches his sexy, knowing smile. I push the door open just wide enough for him to enter. He grabs my hips and our bodies tangle together in a wild storm of lips, nipping kisses and soft moans as we press the door closed with our bodies.
Somehow within the fog of lust, I get nervous. My brain starts thinking about all the things he would think of me if I let this happen tonight. Is it too soon? Would this be it—one and done? I’ve watched him watch me for so long that I feel like we’ve been intimate already. He’s got me halfway to the orgasm of a lifetime just by gripping my hips and nipping my neck with those lush lips. I don’t know where or how to hold him without causing him pain, so I cup my hands into the front pockets of his jeans. I can feel his hard cock in his left pocket.
I twist my fingers into the belt loops of his jeans and tug him towards the bedroom. He walks me backward into the room as my steps weaken and falter. I look directly into his stormy eyes, and all I can see is a man who is hungry. He has the look of a lion roaming the land seeking to devour its next meal. He holds my
gaze for a minute, searching, and I break free from whatever was holding me back.
I don’t know what he’s going to think about my sudden boldness, but I want more of whatever he is offering. It’s so intense, that it would be painful not to have him in my life. I don’t know how long this is going to last, but I know I need him. I lean in closely to him and close my eyes. I brush my lips across his. I nip at his top lip and wait for him to open up to me. Our tongues mingle and our bodies twist in a dangerous game of give and take.
I break the kiss long enough to push his T-shirt up his back, pulling it forward over his head and tossing it down to the floor. My hands tremble as they glide up his chest and over the topside of his shoulders. He is smooth as silk. His skin is perfectly tanned from the California sun, golden and beautiful.
I watch his muscles bulge and jerk, but he never pulls away from me. I can feel his fingers sliding up the backside of his shirt I am wearing. They brush my ass and linger on my lower back. One of his hands splays across my back and brands me, marking me as his. I pull at the button on his jeans while he gathers my hair in his hands, holding it back from my neck. He lays gentle kisses across my shoulders and trails them down my arms. Frantically, I push his jeans over his luscious ass, taking his briefs down with them. His cock springs free of the cloth that was restraining it and it settles between us, thick and hard as a band of steel. I push his jeans down his thighs and drop to my knees.
I run my fingers up the length of his cock and grasp it tightly. He sucks in a deep, sizzling breath and I dart my eyes up at him, wondering if he’s in pain as I touch him. I watch him close his eyes and lick his own lips. He is anticipating the wet feel of my tongue on him. He looks satisfied already; I feel like Aphrodite seducing her lover.
His cock is so thick that I can barely wrap my small fingers around it. I stroke my thumb in little circles over the head and glide my palm up and down his shaft. He lets out a soft moan, so I move my left hand down to caress and tug on his balls. He has a beautiful penis. It’s perfectly long, thick and straight in its beauty.
Thin purple veins ripple along its length, up to the pink mushroom head. I watch pre-cum leak from the tip, and rush to catch it with the pad of my thumb. I look up at him, eyes wide, and he’s watching me with glazed eyes. I suck the pad of my thumb, tasting his first small release. I widen my mouth, taking him all in. God may have given me tiny hands, but I’ve got a big mouth.
I suck, lick and stroke in a sensual pattern until I hear him moaning loudly and whispering to me. I can’t hear what he’s saying over the sound of my own heated blood pounding in my ears. His full length is in my mouth and the tip has slid down into my throat. Singing has taught me how to open my throat fully; I have no gag reflex, thank God. I am lost to his taste as I flatten out my tongue on the in-stroke, and suck and slurp on the out-stroke.
My wetness is running down my thighs in rivulets. He picks up the pace by rocking his hips, and suddenly grabs both sides of my head, locking it in a firm hold, controlling the depth. His cock is thickening and jabbing at my throat. He’s in a free-fall loss of control and I hear him say, “Here’s your warning. I’m going to come. Let loose if you don’t want to swallow.” My lips grip him tighter and I swallow everything as he spurts into my mouth. I suck and lick him clean as he slows the rocking of his hips.
He pulls me up by my shoulders and grins wolfishly at me before he throws me down on the bed. I shriek, laughing. He pushes my shirt up and his eyes devour every inch of my body. His knees separate my thighs, holding them open to him. He cups both of my breasts and rubs his thumbs over each of my hard nipples, causing me to gasp. They are straining upwards to meet his lips. I arch my back up, thrusting both breasts into his face. He voraciously laps at them, giving each one equal time, back and forth between them.
I watch him widen his mouth over my breasts and lave each nipple methodically. He is squeezing them and forcing the whole areola into his mouth, devouring them. Worshiping them. His eyes are closed and he has a look of total rapture on his face. I get wetter just watching him take me as his.
I realize I’m clawing his back, trying to hold him to me. I ease up and he releases me to trail kisses down my stomach. He reaches my clit, opening my folds with his fingers, and sucks it into his mouth. I spasm and thrust my hips towards him. He clenches my ass with both hands, rubbing, squeezing and pulling on both cheeks to get deeper into me. I feel dizzy—panting faster and faster, as my orgasm rushes through me. He gentles his touch and follows through with little licks, rubbing my engorged clit with his thumb.
I lay my head back and calm washes over me. He’s blowing cool breaths of pleasure over me as I melt into him. I’ve orgasmed before, but never have I felt my uterus continue to clench so hard afterward. It feels like aftershocks from an earthquake rumbling through me.
My breathing returns to normal and I can finally think again. All of a sudden, he presses a warm cloth to my thighs and cleans me up. I didn’t even feel him walk away from me. No one has ever cared enough to do that before. I am so moved by his gentleness that tears well up in my eyes.
“Hey, why are you crying? Did I hurt you?” He wipes at the tears running down my cheeks, as he sits on the bed beside me.
“No, you are too kind to me. I don’t expect you to clean me up, that’s all. I don’t know what to do with you.”
“I want to do everything with you.”
“Wow, everything is quite an extensive list. You might have to narrow that down a little or it’s gonna take a while to get through it all.”
He chuckles as he lies down and tucks me into his chest, covering us with the blanket. “Oh, no! I am not narrowing down the list and I really don’t care how long it takes to get through it. I want it all with you.”
I am stunned into silence. Did he mean what he just said or was it just words said too quickly before he could rationalize what he was saying? Should I give him a moment to recant those last words before I react? I would love to find out what “all” is with him, no matter how long it takes. He’s got me on a roller coaster ride. I want it to speed up so that I can feel the exhilaration, but I want it to slow down because I don’t want it to end. He confuses me, but it’s a good confusion.
He tilts my chin up so that I’m looking right into his eyes. “Hey, did I scare you?”
“No. I’m not scared. I was just trying to decipher what you were truly saying to me.” I want to be perfectly honest with him. I don’t ever want to make him feel like he can’t talk to me or trust me. He is so different to me and I already know that this won’t be a typical relationship. It’s already different in a thousand ways than any other I’ve experienced.
“Let me help you, for clarification purposes: I want to laugh and be silly with you, I want to dance with you while you sing to me, and I want to hold you and protect you while we watch scary movies. I want to be completely comfortable with you while we tell each other our inner-most secrets and I want to stay up all night talking and watch the sunrise shine through your hair. With you, I want to feel as if I’ve been found. I’ve been lost for what feels like forever and I don’t want to feel that way anymore.”
I’m not sure how to respond, again. I’m probably going to scare him away. He’s just laid his heart out for me to see and I have lost my words. He turns my mind to mush, and makes me want to jump for joy. What woman wouldn’t want those words said to her? But what if he finds out that I’m really boring? I’m not adventurous, contrary to what everyone believes about my rocker image. I hate so many things that he’s going to find me lacking on a daily basis. I live and breathe music. Will that be the only thing we ever talk about?
“Stop thinking that we just met and that we don’t know each other,” he pleads. “I have watched you for a lifetime already, and I know what I need to know. Learning the rest will be our adventure together.”
I swallow the lump in my throat and take a deep breath before saying, “I would love to do all of that with you and poss
ibly add a few more things to the list if you wouldn’t mind.”
“What would you like to add to the list,” he gently whispers as he kisses my forehead.
“I’m not sure. We’ll make it up as we go along. I should let you go to sleep on that thought. You need to get up early and it’s way past bedtime for both of us. Good night, Nick.” I kiss his lips and tuck myself into his side closely, laying my hand on his chest.
“Good night.”
Chapter 12
Nick
This has been a crazy, unplanned week. I want to spend time with Jenna and had specific plans to make that happen, but things just keep preventing it. She still has Zeus, and I feel good and bad about it. I know she’s taking great care of him, even sending me pics of their silly antics together. I should be looking after him, but I’m glad he’s still there to protect her.
We’ve had forest fires pop up in the area, and I’ve been inspecting my client’s land to maintain the zoning and one hundred feet of defensible space required by California law. I’ve been busting my ass hauling off dead trees and plants, moving wood piles, mulching, and re-sloping vegetation until I just fall over at night. I’ve been too exhausted to even eat at times. Jenna has brought me food late into the evenings on job sites and made sure I wasn’t too tired to drive home. She even followed me one night, just to make sure I was okay when she didn’t believe me. I guess I looked worse than I felt.
She’s brightened my sad, hard life, always surprising me when she appears. I feel like I keep receiving this fabulous present, and don’t know why. She’s the first woman I’ve wanted completely; everyone before her seems so shallow, always trying to take a piece of me that I wasn’t willing to give them. I never understood what was wrong in those relationships until now. Jenna can have it all. Every single piece of me, if she wants. She’s genuine and bursting full of life. She gives, taking nothing for herself. I know exactly what I want when I see her. Her. All of her—every smile, every quick-witted laugh, every smart-ass comment, every dirty thought, every hope for the future. But damnit, I just need to fix a few things in my life first.
