by Lesley Crewe
“Eunie just called. Lila has rheumatic fever.”
“Is that serious? It’s just a fever, right?”
“The doctor said she can’t go back to school for a whole year,” Annie said.
David put his satchel on the floor and dropped into the nearest chair. “A year? Why?”
“Rheumatic fever can be dangerous,” his mother said. “It can damage the valves of the heart.”
The fear that welled up in his throat made it impossible to speak.
“Apparently she had strep throat a while ago, and then this developed.” His mother looked distracted. “She’s not a strong girl.”
“Mom, what can I do?” David asked.
“Pray.”
And so he did. Every night while he lay in bed, he asked God to protect her. It wasn’t fair. Lila had been through so much already. Why did some people struggle while others waltzed through life unscathed? But he knew that life wasn’t fair. He thought of the millions of people who were at war this very night. He would soon be one of them. The minute he finished school, if the war was still on, he’d go overseas and protect the innocent. At least then he’d feel useful.
Mom called Eunie and asked if Lila was well enough for a few visitors. Eunie said Lila would love the company, if only for a few moments. David was unsure if he should accompany his mom and sister. He was afraid his face would somehow give away his feelings.
In the end David went, so as not to raise suspicions. Mom made a special cake, Annie bought Lila some mystery books with her own money, and David went out into the fields near the house and picked daisies. He knew Lila’d like that.
When they arrived at the Johnsons’, Eunie was at the door, Freddy wagging his tail beside her.
“How is she today?” asked Mom.
“She’s tired,” Eunie admitted. “We’ve put her in our room downstairs, so she can be part of the action. It’s too isolating for her to spend every moment upstairs.” She walked ahead of them. “Lila, you have some people who’d love to see you.”
The three of them crowded into the bedroom doorway. Lila was sitting up in bed, wrapped in a robe, looking pale and drained of energy, but she was smiling. Annie went over and hugged her right away. Mom was next to hold her in a tight embrace. David stood at the end of the bed with his flowers.
“Are those for me?”
David nodded.
“Thank you.”
Aunt Eunie took the flowers and came back a few moments later with them in a large Mason jar filled with water. She put them on the table next to Lila.
“I feel like I’m outside now,” she said.
“I’m glad,” David replied.
Annie took the books she was carrying and put them in Lila’s lap. “There. This should keep you busy.”
“A good distraction from schoolwork, which I never want to do.”
“I’ll go slice some cake,” Mom said. “I want you to eat a big piece.” She and Aunt Eunie went into the kitchen.
As Annie sat beside Lila, David leaned against the window ledge.
“Sit,” Lila pointed to the bottom of the bed.
David shook his head. “I’m fine.”
“So are you in pain or anything?” Annie wanted to know.
“I get feverish and my joints are swollen and achy, but it’s not too bad. I’m just tired all the time.”
“You look dreadful.”
“You’re so diplomatic, Annie,” David said.
“Thank goodness. She’s the only one who treats me like I’m not sick.”
“So who brings up your schoolwork?”
“The teacher, Miss MacAuley, or Ewan Spencer.”
“Isn’t he the boy who lives on the farm not far from the cottage?” David asked. “He was never allowed to play with us because he was supposed to be helping out at home.”
“That’s him. His dad died when he was seven and he looks after his mother and two younger brothers.”
“So you have a boyfriend.”
“You’re so diplomatic, David,” Annie mocked.
“He’s a classmate.”
“If he ever tries anything, let me know.”
“He’s not like that.”
“He’s a guy, isn’t he?”
“The only guy I know is you. Are you like that?”
They all had a slice of cake and then it was time to say goodbye. It was all David could do to not gather Lila in his arms and hold her tight. He gave her a smile and a wave and quickly left.
The drive back to Louisbourg seemed to take forever. Annie told them not to worry because she knew that Lila was going to be just fine. David wanted to believe her, but Mom’s silence on the way home suggested otherwise. He wondered what Eunie had said to her in the kitchen.
The minute he got home he said he was going over to a friend’s house, but he didn’t. He went into the bush and pounded his fist against a tree trunk until he bled.
* * *
Summer, with the arrival of Annie, was a wonderful reprieve from the monotony of Lila’s routine, but her weeks of bed rest had taken their toll. Her energy level was low, so she didn’t go too far or do too much. Aunt Eunie waited on her hand and foot until Lila got cross with her.
“I’m not a baby. I need to do things for myself.”
“Of course you do, pet,” Eunie agreed, but nothing changed.
Uncle Joe arrived home one day with a very large package and asked Lila to open it. It was a world atlas that he had ordered from the States. “So you can travel in your imagination.”
Lila got up from the couch and hugged him. “I love you.” Then she hugged Aunt Eunie, who looked like she needed it. “And I love you, too.”
Annie spent her entire summer with Lila. She didn’t invite any friends to the cottage. When Lila asked why not, she said she didn’t feel like it. But Lila knew it was for her, so they could spend quiet time together. When you put Bernice, Erna Jean, and Edie in one room together it was in danger of combusting, and that kind of energy wasn’t helpful to someone in recovery.
They spent a lot of time in the Adirondack chairs at the back of the house, in the shade of the maple trees so Lila wouldn’t get too much sun. They’d have lemonade and one of Lila’s favourite dishes, a fried cheese sandwich. Annie had never heard of anyone frying cheese in a frying pan, but that’s what Aunt Eunie did. She’d place a few slabs of very old cheddar in a pan and fry it until it was bubbly and crispy around the edges. Then she’d slid the gooey mess onto a thick piece of freshly buttered white bread, and they had to eat it hot. Annie said that was one recipe she’d keep in her repertoire.
One day in mid summer, the girls were sitting out in the shade, and Annie had gone so quiet that Lila thought she was dozing. It was easy to drift off in the afternoon heat, listening to the crickets and birdsong all around them, the wind rustling the leaves above their heads. Lila closed her eyes and willed herself to get better, to feel better; to stop the constant anxiety that used up her precious energy and just live.
Out of the blue, Annie—not asleep after all—said, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
“I just want to grow up.”
Annie turned her head and looked at her. “What do you mean? Of course you’re going to grow up.”
“The doctor says my heart is damaged.”
Annie sat bolt upright. “What are you talking about? When was this?”
“He comes pretty regularly to check how I’m doing. He said he heard something with his stethoscope that didn’t sound right, like maybe I have a leaky valve.”
“So he’ll fix it.”
“I don’t think it’s as easy as that.”
“I say it is. I say that we’ll grow up and find a solution to this problem.”
“Okay,” Lila laughed.
Annie rubbed her
forehead, as if to ease a sudden pain.
“I don’t want you to tell anyone. I can’t stand the thought of people pitying me. I need to be normal. That’s all I ever wanted. Do you swear?”
“Maybe Aunt Eunie already told my mom, but I swear I won’t tell David.”
Lila spit in her hand and held it out. Annie spit in hers and they shook on it. They sat back in their chairs.
“What do you want to be when you grow up?” Lila asked her.
“Armed with this new information, I’m going to be a nurse and then a doctor. I’ll have you as right as rain in no time.”
For the third time that week, Lila said “I love you.”
Another summer turned to fall, another fall turned to winter. Lila was able to go back to school for grade nine, but most weeks she missed one or two days. Ewan got in the habit of walking her home, just to make sure she got there safely. He was quiet and calm, which was why Lila liked him. He never looked at her like the other boys did. She could be herself.
One day the weather turned milder throughout the afternoon and the crusty ice started to melt. Instead of walking on the snow, Lila was sinking down with every step up to her knees. Before she had a chance to say anything, Ewan picked her up in his big arms and carried her, Freddy dancing around them the entire time.
“I’m too heavy!” she laughed.
“You’re as light as a feather.”
For the first time she really looked at Ewan. Up close he had nice brown eyes and he needed to shave. His hair was brown, cut shorter than the other boys, and he smelled like hay and horses.
Lila invited him into the house to take a breather, but he said he had to get home to do his chores. He tipped his cap and disappeared into the woods. Lila and Aunt Eunie watched him go.
“Ewan is a dependable young man, and a very hard worker,” Aunt Eunie said. “His mother says she’d be lost without him.”
“He doesn’t have many friends.”
Aunt Eunie poured tea into two cups. “He has nothing in common with boys his age. He’s been doing a man’s work for years now.”
A few days later there was a terrible snowstorm. The wind howled and the snow blew from every direction. Needless to say, no one was going anywhere that day, be it school or work. It was strange to have Uncle Joe around for breakfast on a school day.
“Little snow, big snow,” Uncle Joe said as he slathered strawberry preserves on his plum loaf.
“What does that mean?” Lila asked.
“It means that when the snowflake itself is very small, you usually get a lot of snow. Big snow, little snow means if the snowflakes are big, you tend to get a little snow.
“The old folk have all kinds of sayings,” Uncle Joe continued with his mouth full. “Like a mackerel sky, or a ring around the moon, means bad weather’s coming; red sky at night, sailor’s delight, red sky in the morning, sailors take warning. Did you know that if wasps build their nests high off the ground we’re in for a bad winter?”
“A warm winter means a full graveyard,” Aunt Eunie added.
“I never liked that one,” Uncle Joe admitted.
Lila, amused at being inundated with Cape Breton wisdom, became aware of Freddy whining at the back door. She got up from the table and tried to open the door without the wind taking it and banging it against the house. “Freddy, just pee and come back in,” she hollered as he bolted into the swirling snow.
“I’m sure he heard you,” Uncle Joe laughed.
“You watch. He does exactly what I say. He’ll be back in a minute.”
But he wasn’t. Lila shouted out the door until she was hoarse. Aunt Eunie made her come in.
“But where could he be?” she fretted.
“He’s a dog,” Uncle Joe said. “He likely got the scent of a rabbit and took off after it.”
“He’s never done this before. He’s never this late.”
As the afternoon and the storm dragged on, Lila was frantic. So frantic that Uncle Joe and Aunt Eunie bundled up and walked around the yard yelling into the woods. Lila didn’t obey them and went out too. She called and called and called Freddy, but there was only silence.
They had to drag her inside; she was wet through. For the first time ever, Aunt Eunie got annoyed with her.
“If you die of pneumonia, how do you think we’d feel? Is it asking too much for you to listen to us for once?”
Lila apologized to them both, and then sat on the rocking chair in the parlour, covered her face with her hands, and burst into tears. They tried to comfort her, but she was distraught.
“Dogs aren’t like humans,” Uncle Joe reassured her. “They can survive out in the wild. He’ll curl up and wait till the storm is over. He can hunt for food. Dogs are very smart; you just see if Freddy doesn’t come home soon.
Lila jumped up from the rocking chair. “What’s Ewan’s number? Maybe Freddy’s gone over there.”
Aunt Eunie got it for her and Lila dialled the phone. His mother answered.
“Mrs. Spencer, is Ewan there?”
“Who’s this?”
“It’s Lila Phillips.”
“Lila, how are you, dear?”
Ewan must have grabbed the phone from his mother’s hand. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s Freddy!” she cried. “I let him out hours ago and he hasn’t come home. You know that’s not like him. He always comes when I call. You didn’t see him in your yard, did you?”
“I’ll go out and look.”
“No, don’t you dare! But if you see him out the window, could you let me know?”
“I will.”
“Thanks, Ewan.”
Lila hung up the phone.
Aunt Eunie and Uncle Joe sat in front of the fire and listened to the mantel clock tick off the hours. Lila paced through the house, looking out every window for Freddy to show up. As twilight fell it became unbearable. Just when she was losing hope, Lila spotted Ewan coming through the snow, with Freddy in his arms.
“Ewan’s found him!” She ran to the door and held it open. “I told you not to go outside! Is Freddy okay?”
Ewan didn’t answer her. His face was bright red with cold, his clothes frozen to his body. He pushed past Lila and went right into the parlour in front of the fire. He put the whimpering Freddy on the rug. “He was caught in a rabbit snare. His paw is pretty bad.”
Joe and Eunie quickly ran to get bandages, scissors, hot water, ointment, and blankets. Ewan knelt by the hearth catching his breath. Lila crouched down and nuzzled Freddy’s nose. “You’re all right now, Freddy.” He licked her face.
“That is one smart dog,” Ewan said. “He stayed still the entire time it took me to get that snare off him.”
Aunt Eunie and Uncle Joe took care of the dog. Lila, still on her knees, reached over and embraced Ewan, wet clothes and all. She held him tight, his frozen cheek against her warm one. He stayed very still, with his arms at his sides. Lila leaned back and held his face in her hands.
“No one else could’ve saved him. No one. I think you’re wonderful!”
She kissed him on the cheek.
Then she focused her attention on her injured dog. Aunt Eunie took her turn kissing Ewan. “You have got to get out of these clothes, or you’ll catch your death. I’ve got some hot soup on the stove. Call your mom and tell her you’ll spend the night here.”
“I can’t leave her alone. The power may go off.”
“Are you sure?”
He nodded.
“Well, you’re going to have something warm in your stomach before you leave.”
Ewan sat at the kitchen table and had two big bowls of Scotch broth with flaky hot biscuits smothered in butter. He drank two cups of tea and said he’d better go. Lila ran to get him a dry woollen hat and scarf and mitts. She wrapped the scarf around his neck.
“Do you need a light to see?” she asked.
For the first time that night, he smiled. “I don’t need a light. I know where I’m going.”
Aunt Eunie peered out the kitchen window. “It looks like it’s letting up.”
As Ewan turned to leave, Lila said, “I’ll never be able to repay you.”
“You don’t have to.”
“Oh, but I do. Someday I’ll pay you back. Call me when you get home so I know you’re okay.”
* * *
Walking along the silent white road, as the snow continued to drift thanks to the gusts of wind, Ewan couldn’t keep the smile off his face. He was still wet and uncomfortable, but none of that mattered. Lila had kissed him and told him he’d done what no one else could.
For a while he had despaired of ever finding Freddy, but he hadn’t given up. Lila loved that dog, and since Ewan loved Lila, he’d known he had to bring Freddy home or die trying.
Lila wasn’t like the other girls in school. She was quiet and had a sense of loneliness about her that Ewan recognized. Lila was a kindred spirit.
And when she laughed, she lit up the room. She was the only girl who looked past his old clothes and worn out shoes, and she was the only friend who’d ever come to the farm, wanting to know all about the animals and how he took care of them.
Everyone thought his life was lonely and dull and at times it was, but for the most part he loved the land, the fields that ran down to the rocky beach and the water of Mira Bay constantly moving and changing colour with the weather. He’d be out in the barn before the sun came up, but he’d always go to the door and watch the pink light of the sunrise become gradually golden. Ewan also loved the warmth of the cows’ bulk against his face when he milked them. His cows, Daisy and Bossy, were patient and kind, the chickens were funny and energetic, and his two horses, Queenie and Prince, were loyal and hard working. The saucy barn cats, Popeye and Olive Oil and Priscilla and Sylvester, kept the rats and mice down to manageable numbers. And he had a border collie, Scamp. He considered all of them his friends.
Now that his brothers were older, they were helping him, but every time Ewan mentioned buying more livestock, both of them talked about getting away from the farm and getting jobs in town. Ewan knew that one day they would leave and not look back.
