by Lesley Crewe
Louis and his partner, Stephens, still lived in New York City. They flew in on a private jet for the funeral. The church was packed and the reception afterwards was catered. If Colleen hadn’t known better, she would have said it was a cocktail party for the movers and shakers of the business world. Her grandfather’s body was placed in the family crypt at a local cemetery. Colleen didn’t know they had a family crypt. It sounded creepy. Her sister said it was on the better side of the cemetery.
“You mean he’s on the side that’s deader than dead?”
Their mother told them their grandfather had left them both a letter that was to be read in private. Colleen was intrigued. Naturally Frankie ran off and came back about a minute later. “He said I was a beautiful girl and he loved me. He gave me a cheque for fifty thousand dollars and told me to spend it on shoes!”
While Frankie celebrated, Colleen went into her old room. She opened up the letter.
Dear Colleen,
Your mother has kept me up to date with the work you’ve done on the farm in Cape Breton, and how the craft store has now hired more people in your rural area. You have a nose for business, my dear. Maybe you’re even a chip off the old block. I know you haven’t had it easy, but in the end that’s what will make you stronger. You’re a beautiful girl and I love you. Grandfather.
Colleen felt like crying. She hadn’t really known her grandfather, and now, seeing his shaky handwriting, she realized that that was an opportunity lost. You think these people are going to be around forever. He practically was around forever, and they had never spent any time together. Why was that? It was a shame.
Her cheque was for fifty thousand dollars too. Then she looked again. There was another zero. A half a million dollars? What on earth was she going to do with this? She didn’t deserve it. The little voice inside (the one everyone in the family called Aunt Annie) said, “Put it away until you can think.” That’s what she’d do. She’d deposit it at the Credit Union when she got back to Cape Breton. She could only think on the beach with Lucky beside her.
Colleen tucked the cheque into her wallet, put the wallet in her purse, put her purse in her suitcase, and zipped and locked the suitcase. She almost put the key down the front of her bra, a consequence of having watched too many cowboy movies.
She joined her mother and sister.
“Well,” Frankie asked, still grinning from ear to ear.
“He said I was a beautiful girl and that he loved me. My cheque is for fifty thousand dollars too!”
“Did he tell you what to spend it on?”
“Candy.”
“Oh, he did not. Daddy always was a generous man,” Mom sniffled. “I’ll miss him.”
Dad came down for the funeral of course. He and her grandfather had respected each other. At seventy, Dad looked pretty good for his age, but Colleen knew he suffered with his stomach. She could always tell when he was in pain. His eyes looked duller.
He was taking her and Frankie out for dinner and asked Mom if she and Derek would like to come along. Mom said that would be nice, but when she met them at the restaurant she was alone. Dad pulled out her chair for her.
“Where’s Derek?”
“Something came up. He had to go out of town at the last minute.”
Just the way she said it, Colleen knew something was wrong, but her mother arranged her face into a polite mask. “This is nice, isn’t it? Just the four of us.”
Colleen did think it was nice. It reminded her of when they used to sit at the table in Montreal. “I wonder what ever happened to Elena?”
Frankie took a sip of water. “She always liked you better than she liked me.”
“She hated me too, Frankie, so don’t worry about it.” Mom picked up the menu and stared at it.
Dad looked confused. “Who are we talking about? Who hated who?”
“It doesn’t matter…it was our cook in Montreal.”
“Why would she hate you?”
“She always thought I was too hard on Colleen about her eating habits.”
“You were.”
Colleen silently cheered.
“I don’t want to ruin the evening. Let’s drop it.”
Colleen looked at her mother. “You never want to talk about it. Does that mean you feel guilty, please, God?”
The waiter picked that moment to come and take their orders for drinks. Colleen was surprised when Mom ordered a glass of white wine. She and her father and sister gave each other covert glances. Mom didn’t look up from the menu. “Mind your own business.”
Colleen had been planning on having a nice piece of baked salmon, but reconsidered.
The waiter came back with their drinks and asked if they were ready to order. Dad looked around. “Does anyone want appetizers first? I don’t.”
Both Mom and Frankie said no.
“I’ll have the large sampler platter and for dinner I’ll have the fettuccine carbonara,” Colleen said calmly.
Her mother glared at her.
Colleen glared back. “Mind your own business.”
Dad ordered a steak and baked potato. Frankie wanted fish and chips, and mom said she’d have a piece of grilled chicken with steamed vegetables.
When the waiter put the sampler platter in front of Colleen, it was so big she had to move her cutlery and glass out of the way. It was piled high with onion rings, mozzarella sticks, chicken fingers, potato skins, and Buffalo wings.
She looked at her mother’s face. Dad and Frankie were killing themselves in the background.
“Would you like some, Mother?”
Mom grabbed an onion ring. “You think you’re funny, don’t you?”
They damn near ate all of it.
Before they went back to Cape Breton, Colleen and her dad invited Frankie’s kids to go out for lunch. The boys declined, which was too bad. Colleen didn’t know her nephews as well, now that they were growing up. That would hopefully change when they got older.
The person they really wanted to take to lunch was Hilary. Both Colleen and her dad nearly died when they arrived for the funeral. She had pink hair, a nose ring, and so much eyeliner on she looked like a raccoon. Her face brightened when she saw them, and Colleen could still make out the little girl they adored, but the minute her mother walked in the room, the smile was replaced with a sullen demeanor. It was like a light had switched off.
They took her to a Thai restaurant she liked. Colleen knew her father wouldn’t be able to eat anything, but he was a trooper. He ordered some sort of plain noodle concoction and fiddled with it.
“So, how goes the war?” Dad asked her.
“Which one? The one at home, the one at school, or the one being waged on our planet by gas-guzzling freaks who drive their kids a block to school in their shiny SUVs?”
Colleen figured she’d better pick one. “The one at home.”
Hilary ate her pad Thai with chopsticks. “Mom spends her life at the gym or the spa or the mall. Dad travels every week so he’s never home and when he does come home he lives on the cell phone. If you ask me he’s having an affair. Mark’s in residence and flunking out of Saint Mary’s and Adam is dealing drugs.”
Poor old Dad choked on his noodles and had to take a glass of water. Colleen slapped him on the back. When he finally got his wind back, he kept dabbing his face with his napkin and sputtering, “How can this be? Is this true? This is so upsetting. Little Adam dealing drugs?”
Hilary put another mouthful on her chopsticks. “I don’t know if he’s dealing drugs, but he has weed in his room.”
Ah, to be young again, Colleen thought.
“I can’t believe your father would be having an affair.” Dad was still sweating. It was probably the spices.
Colleen looked at him. “I couldn’t believe it either…I mean, I can’t believe it either.”
; It went right over his head.
Hilary backed down on that as well. “I can’t say for sure that he is. I just heard Mom on the phone say that Dad was too tired for sex and she was getting sick of it, so I figured he must be getting it elsewhere.”
Dad’s mouth dropped open. Colleen felt sorry for him. She decided to press ahead. “And I suppose Mark is only getting average grades, so he’s not really flunking.”
“If I was bringing home C’s, I’d get shit for it.”
Colleen was going to have to get her dad out of the restaurant before his heart stopped. “Dad, why don’t you go to the men’s room and splash some water on your face? You’re looking a little flushed.”
He fumbled around with his napkin. “Yes, yes…perhaps I should.”
Hilary was unaware that she was flustering her grandfather. The narcissism of youth was mind blowing. Colleen remembered it well. As soon as he lurched off to the john, Colleen got right to it.
“How are you and your mother getting along?”
“We’re not. She thinks I’m a lesbian.”
Thank God Dad was gone.
“And are you?”
“How do I know? I’ve only ever kissed animals.”
“Good point.”
“I know she’s ashamed of me, so screw her.”
“Oh Hilary, she’s not ashamed of you, honey. Let me tell you about your mother. I hate to say it, but the only thing she ever thought she had going for her was her beauty. She gets her self-esteem from it. Your grandmother Hanover brought her up that way, so it’s not really your mom’s fault.”
“How come you escaped?”
“Just lucky, I guess. She really is a good person. You and your mom will be best friends one day. Have a little patience. She tried so hard to have you. You’re very much wanted.”
Hilary grunted.
Early the next morning, while Dad organized their suitcases, Colleen snuck into her mother’s room. She looked very small in her king-sized bed. She was wearing her black silk eye mask.
Colleen reached over and touched her mother’s shoulder. “Mom?”
She sat straight up. “What?”
“It’s me. Dad and I are leaving soon. We’ll let you know when we get home.”
“Okay. Goodbye, dear.” She puckered her lips.
Only her mother would say goodbye to someone with a mask on. Colleen leaned down and her mother kissed her. Then she lay back down again. Colleen was at the door when she thought of something.
“Mom?”
She sat straight up. “What?”
“Are you and Derek okay?”
“We’re getting a divorce.”
Colleen came back in the room. “A divorce?”
“Don’t sound so surprised. It happens all the time.”
“But…”
“He was too clingy. Your father was never like that. It bugged me after awhile. Safe trip.” Zorro fell back into bed.
Colleen got in the car and turned on the engine. Dad put on his seatbelt.
“Mom and Derek are getting divorced.”
“I knew he wouldn’t last.”
“How did you know?”
“She’s only ever loved me.”
That’s all he said on the subject.
She dropped Dad and his suitcase off at the house, told him she’d see him on the weekend, and then took the car to the Credit Union and asked to see the manager. A half-a-million-dollar cheque isn’t something you can deposit at an ATM machine. Maybe a teller, but she didn’t want everyone knowing her business.
The manager was delighted to hold onto her money for her and told her she should speak to one of their investment advisors. She said she’d leave that for another day. A lot of it she would put away for her old age, but she knew she was going to buy Ewan and Lila a new truck and a new tractor. And she wanted to build a few more craft stores in and around Cape Breton, creating more work for rural women. The artistry of the women in small communities was breathtaking.
Her big indulgence was going to be buying her own horse. She’d always wanted a horse. And a pot-bellied pig.
By this point, Colleen was desperate to get to the bungalow. She needed to breathe Round Island air. It was the middle of September and the weather was still lovely. When she unlocked the door the place was hot and stuffy. She stood in the middle of the room and thought about the things she could do now to spruce the place up, and then decided she wanted to leave it exactly as it was. Some things were never meant to be messed with.
Once she unpacked, she headed across the field towards the farm. It felt so good to get out of the city, with its traffic lights and road signs and miles of strip malls. Uncle Louis and Stephens had asked her to stay at their penthouse if she was ever in New York. Fat chance. She extended the invitation to them as well. If they did come she’d buy a movie camera to record their first impressions.
As always, Lucky was waiting by the brook. Lila said he waited there when she was away. It was sort of halfway between the properties. He knew to have his supper and stay at the farm to sleep, but every day he’d go down to see if she was coming.
She clapped her hands. “Hello, baby boy!”
He lifted his head. It’s pretty hard to run and wiggle with excitement at the same time, but Lucky managed it. She rubbed his head and patted him all over before giving him a scratch by his tail. His back foot scratched the air and then he rolled over and wanted his belly done.
The two of them walked up to the farm. No one seemed to be around, which was unusual. She didn’t see Ewan’s truck, but Duncan’s was there. She called his name around the yard, but he didn’t answer. Mystified, she went into the house. There he was, singing to the radio while frying up thick slabs of bologna. Polly gave her a wolf whistle.
It felt like home.
“There she is! I was wondering when you’d be back. The place hasn’t been the same without you. Want a bologna sandwich?”
“Sure. Where are Ewan and Lila?”
“They’re visiting one of Ewan’s brothers in the hospital. He was in a car accident with his cab last night. Broke his leg or his arm or something important. He’ll be out in a couple of days.”
“Thank heavens for that.”
She watched him flip the bologna over and over again.
“If you’d leave that alone it would cook faster.”
He pointed the spatula at her. “Now there you go again, always telling me what to do. Were you bossy as a child?”
Colleen thought about it. “No, I was a big wuss.”
“You’ve gotten bossy over the years, then, but you ain’t the boss of me. Not yet, anyway.” He flipped the bologna onto a plate. “There’s bread in the breadbox and mustard in the fridge.”
“Talk about bossy.” She did as she was told and he made two sandwiches. They sat down at the small kitchen table and took big bites.
“This is so good,” she said, “I don’t know why more restaurants don’t have fried bologna sandwiches on their menus.”
He pointed at the side of her mouth. “You’ve got some mustard…”
She wiped at it. “Is it gone?”
“I’ll get it.” He reached over and kissed it off.
When he stopped, she didn’t move.
“Well?” he said.
“Do that again.”
He did it in the kitchen, he did it in the living room, and he did it in the upstairs bedroom. He was still doing it when Ewan’s truck came up the driveway. He looked down at her. “They’re back.”
The two of them scrambled around like kids. They set a record for putting clothes back on, running to the kitchen and sitting down at the table just as Ewan and Lila walked in the door.
Polly jumped around and squawked, “Hi Mama! I want ice cream! Ice cream!”
“Hi P
olly, hi everyone,” Lila said. “Glad you’re back. How did everything go?”
“Great!” Colleen took a big bite of sandwich.
“Your grandfather’s funeral was great?”
Duncan stood up. “I think I better be getting out to the barn.”
“I’ll come with you,” Ewan said.
Lila sat down at the table and pointed at her. “Your shirt’s inside out.”
“Pretty bird!” Polly added.
* * *
A heavy rainstorm lashed the east coast later that week. Great gusts of wind bent over trees and power lines. The yard was full of branches and leaves and even shingles. The roar from the beach was deafening. Lila couldn’t imagine how big the waves were or how high the tide was. At the door, she tasted the salt from the crashing surf melded with the torrential rain as it blew inland, and saw seagulls and crows flung through the air by mighty gusts. The light was an eerie underwater colour and it made the house dark and gloomy even at eleven in the morning.
Lila watched as Ewan, Duncan, and Colleen braced themselves against the force of the wind to check that the doors to the barns and sheds were locked tight with the animals safely inside.
Gales were a common occurrence. She remembered Annie’s dad telling them about the August gales he’d seen as a kid. Boats were lost, wharfs gone, breakwaters decimated. He said living by the sea was a privilege and a hardship, depending on Mother Nature’s whims.
Everyone on the island knew when to batten down the hatches and lay low until the great Atlantic storms rolled back out to sea, heading for Newfoundland.
Lila set about making fires in both fireplaces and lighting the oil lamps to keep the dimness at bay. She placed a big pot of corn chowder on the gas burner to simmer for lunch and put the kettle on to make the tea. She was taking scones off the cooling racks to put in a napkin-draped breadbasket when the phone rang. No doubt it was David to check up on Colleen. She went to the phone.
“Hello?”
It was David.
“Colleen is fine. They’re doing their rounds and they’ll be back inside shortly. We’ve lost our power, have you?”
“Yes, I was listening to the radio and most of this side of the island is affected.”
