Valli took her music seriously. She took her fans seriously. And giving back was part and parcel of who she was. She'd done some anti-alcohol and anti-drug messages. Also some encouraging mentors.
Only Charlie and her accountant knew there was a fund growing steadily that would go toward helping underprivileged kids get money for college supplies. Grants were out there, but how did they manage once they got in to college? They had to live and eat...Valli hoped to be able to fill that gap at some point. But it was still too soon to go public with it.
And now she had a delicious hunk, did she?
Hmm. That wasn't far off the truth. John qualified as "delicious" in her book.
Thoughts of John, never far away, made Valli look at the clock. It was late now, proving Carol right in her assumption that John would be pulling an all-nighter with Dr. Lin.
Muttering a little prayer that he was okay and that his memories were returning, Valli got ready for bed. She'd be alone in it tonight. Alone but for those haunting images of John rearing up over her. John's mouth on her body, his hands caressing her between her thighs, blinding moments of ecstasy...
Yeah, she was mooning over him.
Sighing, Valli slid into her cold bed and thumped the pillow. There wasn't a damn thing to be gained by chewing over each and every second they'd spent together.
She promptly spent the next hour tossing and turning and doing just that. Reliving a night that had altered everything and shifted Valli Solo's universe. Sleep finally claimed her, only to be filled with dreams of the man, strangely erotic dreams that left her half awake and fully aroused.
It was a long, restless night for Valli, who finally staggered blearily into the shower early the next morning. She scolded herself as she dressed, beating herself up for acting like a lovestruck teenager.
Resolutely, she sat by the French doors with her morning coffee and let the sunshine warm her bones. She'd have to see John today. She wanted to find out what was going on with him. How he was--if he had his memory back.
After that, well--she didn't know. One thing at a time was her philosophy and she was sticking to it.
Two nurses walked briskly along the path just beyond her little patio. She didn't recognize their voices, but could hear them quiet clearly.
"And amazingly enough, it worked."
"Get out."
"Really. I'm not kidding. He was told to have sex to stimulate some cortical connections and damn if it didn't pay off."
"Sex improves brain functions? How come nobody ever told me I could fuck myself smart?"
"Don't know. It's new to me too. Dr. Felix is thrilled, even though he can't take credit for doing anything. Apparently some hot time in the sack was the only cure necessary."
"Damn. Does that come with a prescription?"
Their laughter faded as they walked on, leaving Valli cold in the warmth of the California sunshine. She stared at her hand, realizing it was shaking. Automatically she stood, walked to the table and put down her coffee cup before she dropped it.
Her brain whirled, desperately trying to process what she'd just heart.
Told to have sex?
John had been told to fuck her? She was a prescription? A therapy? Was that all it was? All it had been? An effort to jumpstart some brain cells?
She shook her head almost violently. No. She couldn't buy that. She wouldn't buy that. Nobody could be that cold, that clinical. Or put that much emotion into the act.
Although perhaps someone with no memories could.
It went round and round in her mind, spinning from one viewpoint to another, driving Valli to pace and twist her fingers together without even being aware of her physical agitation.
No matter how she tried to dismiss it, a little niggling doubt always remained. Finally she straightened, took a deep breath and determined to find out for herself. When in doubt, get the information from the source. It was a belief she'd held on to during her career and it had served her well.
So--she had to see John. Now. Before the pain that lurked as a dark shadow around her heart grew to unmanageable proportions.
She strode to the door and opened it to look directly into Carol's eyes.
"Hey, Valli. You're up. Good. How are you today?"
"I want to see John. It's important."
"Honey, come sit down for a minute." Carol's gaze slid away from Valli's.
"No. No sitting down. I need to see him." She swallowed. "It's really important, Carol. I don't ask this lightly."
"I know." Carol took her by the arm and led her to the couch. "Sit down. I'm here about John."
Valli sat, her legs weak, her pulse thudding loudly in her ears. "What is it? What's happened?"
Carol perched on the arm of the sofa. "There was a breakthrough last night. With Dr. Lin. They were working on it when two men arrived. I didn't see them, but apparently they were quite official looking. Dark suits and stuff. They went in to see John and Dr. Lin." She paused. "John left with them last night, Valli. He's gone."
There was a roaring in Valli's ears and she clutched Carol's hand tightly. "Did you say he's gone?"
Carol nodded. "I'm sorry, Valli. Yes, he's gone. And nobody's got any records of who those two men were or where they all went. Even John's files have vanished. It's like he was never here." She frowned. "We're private. We keep our records secure. But I guess that wasn't quite enough for whoever they were."
"Like he was never here." Valli echoed Carol's words. She was blinded, stunned, rocked to her core.
Woodenly, she disengaged her hand from Carol's. "Thanks for telling me, Carol. I appreciate it."
Carol stood and looked at her uncertainly. "Are you all right?"
Dredging up a smile, Valli nodded. "Sure. In fact, I'm thinking it's time for me to head out too. I need to get back to work. All this lazing around in the sunshine--it's not good for a girl to get too relaxed, you know?"
"If you think you're ready..."
Valli waved a hand. "Oh yeah. I'm ready. Can't wait to make music."
"Well, it's up to you. We can't keep you here, much as we'd like to." Carol hugged Valli, who remained stiff in her embrace. "Let him go, dear. Make your music. Move on, okay?"
"Sure, Carol." Valli eased away. "And thanks for everything."
She watched Carol glance uncertainly over her shoulder and smile. She heard the door shut behind her. She stood in the middle of an empty room with a roiling cauldron of emotions seeping through her, leaving her brittle and close to shattering into a million tiny pieces.
Valli walked to her cell phone, picked it up and dialed Charlie.
"Charlie. Come get me. It's time to move on."
After his brief attempt at conversation was terminated by an unresponsive Valli, she closed the phone and sat down on the couch.
Then buried her face in the cushions--and wept.
Chapter Seven
Three months later--Atlanta, Georgia
"So--you ready, baby?"
Charlie stood next to Valli in the wings, an arm around her shoulders as they listened to the crowd roaring for their warm-up intro band.
"Yeah. I'm ready."
He glanced at her. "Sure? No nerves?"
"Other than the usual ones? No. Why should there be?" Valli kept her eyes toward the stage.
"Well, all that business about security. Every time I turn around, I trip over some dude with a headset talking into his sleeve."
Valli chuckled. "Charlie, don't you read the news? Couple of weeks ago, they busted some terrorist cell down this way. Nipped a bomb plot in the bud. Can't blame the Atlanta PD for being antsy right now." She looked around. "Although you're right, there are a helluva lot of security guys, aren't there?"
"Hey. To keep you safe? It's worth it, I reckon."
She hugged him. "I love you, Charlie."
"I love you too, sweetheart. You sure you want to do the Big Song last? I still think you ought to start out with it."
Valli sighed. The Big Song. Th
ey always spoke of it like it had capital letters. It had been the first track she'd cut after leaving Rolling Hills and when the album was released the following month, it had soared to the top of the charts like a rocket. Something in the words or the melody seemed to have touched so many people.
They couldn't get enough of it. I will remember you. Both song and album had gone platinum, earning acclaim from crossover listeners and critics alike. Charlie was beside himself and Valli was thrilled.
It helped her deal with the pain she still felt every time she heard it or performed it. This would be the first time she'd done it live for an audience, the first real full-scale concert since--since that time.
"It has to be the last song, Charlie. I can't do any more after that one."
He gazed at her. "I know. I wish I could help, but I can't."
She swallowed, then lifted her chin as she heard her cue. "Gotta go. Wish me luck."
"Always." He dropped a kiss on her nose and tugged her hair as he always did before she went on.
And then the voices rose to a deafening shriek, the lights came up and the concert began. For the next hour, Valli went through her repertoire of standards, threw in some of her newer material and a couple of songs off the latest CD.
The audience loved them all, greeting them with applause, cheers, hoots and whistles, singing along with their favorites and calling out their pleasure at the end of each number.
Finally, sweating and weary, Valli pulled up a small stool and the lights lowered to a single spot. She picked up her favorite guitar, plugged it in to the single amp, sat down and took a swig of the water from the bottle next to her.
"Last song, folks. You've worn me out." She laughed as the audience hollered in response. A soft strum to check that the system was working. "I think you might recognize this one." She began to pluck at the strings, a simple country rhythm that she'd turned into something so much more. The auditorium hushed into a muffled silence. They knew what was coming.
And so Valli Solo sang the one song that had given her the status of superstar. The sweetly romantic ballad that had defied trends and violated every law of what was supposed to be a hit.
It was a love song, pure and simple. A song from the heart, from the soul. A song that reached inside listeners and made them stop what they were doing for a moment or two. It urged them to share the magical wonder of love and the sweet pain of loss. It took them back to when they were first in love and it offered the hope of first love to those who hadn't yet experienced it.
It was called I Will Remember You. And every time she sang it, Valli's heart ached anew.
This night was no exception. Blind to the audience and lost in her music, Valli poured her heart into the song, throwing everything she had, everything she felt into the performance. The spotlight held her safely, snugly, cocooning her in her own world for these few fleeting moments.
The last chord died away, and the final words "I will remember you..." soared across thousands of silent listeners.
Valli sighed and looked up--straight into the vivid blue eyes of the man standing on the front of the stage. He must have climbed up while she was singing--she wouldn't have seen him if he hadn't stepped into the spotlight.
She gulped and put down her guitar, never taking her eyes off him. The entire theater was so still a pin would have sounded like a detonation.
He moved a step toward her just as she moved toward him. As if controlled by another more powerful hand, Valli reached out, only to see her move mirrored as he reached for her.
And there, on the stage of a crowded theater in Atlanta, Valli Solo found her mystery man again.
They moved into each other's arms without words and kissed, a kiss that broke the spell over the entranced audience. Roars of approval rolled around the couple embracing so passionately onstage. It was chaos, even when the house lights came on. Security was everywhere, the fans jumping up and down and applauding, the musicians laughing and rattling their instruments. Flashlights were exploding in total violation of the "no photos" rule--and in the middle of it all was a couple who had found each other again and heard none of it.
Valli was still kissing John. Nothing else mattered.
Neither heard the screams of approval as he picked her up in his arms and stalked into the wings.
Neither heard Charlie's voice or the calls of the backstage crew.
Neither could see anything beyond each others' faces, each others' eyes. And when John put her back on her feet in her dressing room and shut and locked the door, she flung herself on him once again, kissing him with her heart on her lips.
He kissed her back the same way, lingeringly, thrusting his tongue into her mouth, demanding she open for him and taste him back.
"John, oh God, John--" Valli knew her hands were all over him, touching him, squeezing him, reassuring herself he was real and not a figment of her imagination.
He wasn't. "Valli, love. Jesus, Valli--I've missed you so fucking much--" He backed her into the wall, kissing her frantically, scrabbling at her clothing.
"I've missed you too." She gasped for air and shrugged out of her dress. "Take this off. Quick." Buttons popped on John's black shirt and she vaguely registered a wire going from his ear to his waistband.
The need was too great, too overwhelming for her to question it. Not right now, not at this moment when John was already pushing his jeans down around his ankles and reaching for her.
"Shit." He scrabbled around and pulled a condom from the denim hobbling him.
"Hurry."
Valli's bra was dangling off one elbow, her pants and shoes were on the other side of the dressing room, her hair pricked her eyes and none of it mattered. The only thing she wanted was John, touching her, inside her, lighting that fuse that she knew would send her into orbit.
"Okay." John grabbed her. "Lift your legs. No time for subtleties here."
Valli wasn't about to argue. She clung to his shoulders, letting him take her weight as his hands slid around to cup her ass and lift her.
They stumbled, staggering until Valli felt the wall behind her back. Clothing tumbled around them and she realized they were half in the closet area. They could have been in a palace or a barn for all she cared. The blood pulsed in her body, her flesh ached for his touch and when he rubbed himself against her, she gasped out a cry of total pleasure. "Oh yes, yes--"
"By the way..." He groaned and rested his forehead against hers, almost there, but not as far inside her as she so desperately needed him to be.
"What?"
"My name? It really is John."
Valli rubbed her face against his. "That's nice. Fuck me first. Talk later, okay?"
A muffled laugh greeted her words, quickly suppressed as he kissed her hard, gripping her ass tightly and pressing himself into her heat. She was wet for him, ready and needy, wanting him stretching her and filling her with the only thing she desired at that moment.
It was hard and fast and passionate and Valli knew the orgasm was already creeping up her spine even as John began to thrust into her, banging them both against the dressing room wall.
Her breath gasped from her lungs in time with John's body as it crashed into hers. There was no finesse, no delicacy, nothing but two people yearning to merge into one, two hearts singing with joy, two pairs of lips clashing in kisses that seemed to go on forever.
Eternity lasted only a few seconds for Valli. With John buried deep and sliding over inner walls slick with the juices of her arousal, the spasms began, and she sucked in air on a gasp as her fingers dug into his shoulders.
His hands were doing the same thing, grasping her ass hard enough to leave marks, a sharp sensation that heightened her awareness of the man. She clung to him, knowing that this was more than a quickie up against the wall. It was a reaffirmation of what they'd had, a confirmation that their desire was as sharp and as real as anything they'd experienced.
For Valli, the real part was uppermost in her mind. Her climax was build
ing to a crescendo, but that was secondary to the ecstasy she felt at simply being in his embrace again. She'd tried to leave him behind, but had failed. She wanted him with her, around her, loving her the way he had in California. She'd found something special with John, and greedily she'd wanted more, only to try and persuade herself she couldn't have it and could go on without it.
Now, in these brief seconds before she exploded, Valli knew she'd lied to herself. It was John in her heart. It would always be John.
The relief in her mind blended with the imminent eruption of her body and she let her head drop back against the wall. "Keerriiiiist..."
Tremors began, spiraling rapidly out of control as John hammered into her ruthlessly, urging her on and upward with his hushed grunts and finally locking them both together as he too let go and came.
They froze, Valli's ankles clamped tight to John's spine, John's hands clinging to Valli's buttocks like limpets. There wasn't a centimeter of space between them, not an inch of skin that couldn't sense the other's response, the ripples of release shaking them both.
The sheer bliss of the moment brought tears to Valli's eyes and she sobbed as they held each other, riding the mutual wave of pleasure. She'd dreamed of this so many times, knowing she would be better off not indulging in such dreams. Now she knew the reality was so much more--so perfect.
John shifted a little and groaned. "Hello. I'm John Goodwin. Pleased to meet you."
Valli laughed as their bodies slipped free of the sensual embrace. "Nice to meet you too." She staggered as her legs trembled and gripped him for a second before finding her balance.
He let her go once she was standing under her own power and ducked into the tiny bathroom. Valli absently disentangled her bra straps and grabbed a robe from the twisted and tortured rack they'd just seriously messed up. "I can't believe you really are a John."
His laugh sounded over the flushing of her toilet and he emerged smiling, naked, looking about as content as she'd ever seen him. She watched him as he walked to a pile of clothing and sorted out his briefs and jeans, pulling them on unselfconsciously.
Forget-Me-Not Page 7
