Moonlight Binding Magic

by Charlotte Munich

  “Sorry.”

  “Yeah,” Sam complained. “Never, ever do that to us again.”

  Since Linus didn’t let me go, the hug soon turned into a group thing. Even Sam looked moved by my return. They must really have missed me.

  “Especially,” Thom added triumphantly, “when we have such good news to share with you!”

  We sat down in the living room, sparsely furnished with a secondhand sofa and various unmatched carpets covering the bare concrete floors. It was true: the place still needed a lot of work. But to me, it looked absolutely wonderful.

  Even more marvelous was the piece of news Thom gave me then, after opening a bottle of local wine. A label had approached the guys after the concert. Negotiations had been initiated, contracts drafted, offers and counteroffers had been going back and forth. The guys had been discussing our career and wanted my input ASAP. They didn’t want to give up too much. They were contemplating a hybrid career, with some of our titles label produced and others independently produced and distributed. We needed to have some serious business discussions. It was awesome.

  But then, as the evening unfolded, full of energy and promises, I could see Tristan fading away.

  I mean, he was as enthusiastic as the others, full of good advice, and it was clear that he believed in us very much—as he had from the start. But he was wearing that wig again, the pink one, which I found unnerving. Elise had excused herself some time ago to go to bed, and the band had been discussing merchandising or some other engrossing subject. One minute he’d been Tristan, my weird ally from the realms, whom I could summon into my life. And the next instant, he was Circus Manager Tristan, the quirky bullshitter who had offered us our first gig in ages.

  Not the same person.

  I stood up, suddenly very afraid.

  “Are you all right, Vic?” Linus asked, frowning.

  “Yes. But I just remembered I had a very important errand to run with Tristan before he leaves for the night.”

  Linus’s eyes went from Tristan to me while Sam snickered not very discreetly.

  “An errand? Now?”

  “Yes. I know it’s past midnight. I’m a little jet-lagged after spending a week in convalescence. But it’s really important that we do this now,” I tried to explain.

  I looked at Tristan.

  “Can we?”

  He nodded and stood up without a word.

  “Don’t worry,” I told Linus. “I’ll be back shortly.”

  I didn’t know everything about my future, but one thing was for sure: I wasn’t going to ditch the band and everything we’d already created together. I wanted to go back to them, to keep making music, to renovate that barn. It really was my life.

  What I didn’t know was where Tristan could fit into it. I liked him very much, but I wasn’t sure I was meant to hold a place in his life, either, be that magically or otherwise.

  It was a loose end we needed sorted out, as soon as possible.

  Outside, the moon was shining brightly, which I’d come to accept as ordinary. In Tristan’s realm, the moon was kind of a given: always there, always bright, to the point where it seemed as were it always full. And maybe it really was. The place was cursed, after all.

  We went by Elise’s dark farm and the stables where the cows slept peacefully. Looking at Tristan’s car, I had to notice it wasn’t a black sedan anymore. It was a lime-green convertible. I stopped dead in my tracks.

  “Tristan, why are you doing this?”

  “Doing what?” he asked, confused.

  “You’re hiding under your Circus Manager disguise again.”

  He shrugged, looking nervous. “I don’t know. I haven’t changed anything. As far as you’re concerned, I don’t know that I can control it.”

  “I haven’t changed anything, either,” I protested, knowing in my heart that it was a lie.

  Because something had shifted in me. Now I was sure I wanted to stay in my world and live my life. But I had another big decision to make. And I wasn’t so sure anymore that it was about magic.

  “Shall we give you ten minutes to find me?” Tristan asked. “Just like the other day?”

  He seemed very skeptical, and a little depressed, and suddenly, I knew exactly what I needed to do.

  “Yes. Give me ten minutes. But promise me one thing: if I can’t find you within these ten minutes, you’ll come back here right away. Otherwise I’ll…I’ll trash your car. In fact, give me your keys, now.”

  Since he was probably rich enough that his car meant nothing to him, I insisted again. “Promise me you’ll come back right away.”

  He handed me his keys, frowning. “You really think you’re not going to be able to find me?”

  I exhaled loudly. “I don’t know. I just don’t want you to use it as a pretext to ditch me,” I said truthfully.

  He shook his head, his eyes glowing almost red in the darkness. “I won’t.” He looked at his watch. “Half-past midnight. You have until…”

  He disappeared, leaving me alone to finish his sentence.

  “Twenty to one,” I whispered.

  I sat down on a stone nearby, shivering in my wool sweater, and spent the next ten minutes listening to the faint noises coming from the stables. I didn’t even try to look for him or think about anything.

  At forty past midnight, Tristan came back. Not only was he in his pink wig, he was also wearing a truly flamboyant magenta suit that would clash magnificently with the lime green of his car. He looked agitated.

  “It’s not working anymore?” he asked.

  “No,” I said, after ten minutes of not even trying. “I’m sorry. It looks as though our magical bond is truly broken.”

  What I’d decided was that we would never know if that bond still existed. And in any case, if it did, I’d vowed never to use it again. Because I’d made up my mind: I wanted us to have something else than a magical bond. A friendship bond, or something more if it folded out that way. But in any case, I wanted something with him that didn’t have to be ruled by magic.

  “You’re free, Tristan.” I swallowed. Now was the time to make a wish. “I really, really set you free. I’m not going to be following you around anymore or summoning you. But…”

  He frowned. He was starting to get it, and he didn’t look pleased.

  “But?”

  I sighed. “But I would really like to still have you in my life. Without the magic.”

  The silence that followed was far too long. Things didn’t look too good, I thought with a sinking feeling. When he finally spoke, I was prepared to be let down more or less softly.

  “I don’t know,” he said. “I think I understand what you’re offering and asking. You want a true relationship, one that isn’t polluted by magic. But I don’t think it’s possible. Not for me, anyway. Magic and all the problems it can cause in its wake are an integral part of my life. It’s even more than that—it’s my heritage and my responsibility. I can’t just give that up, even for a second. Even for a beautiful and talented musician that I know I could love very much.”

  My head was swimming. Doors and portals were closing in front of us, shutting down faster and faster now.

  “I’m not asking that you give it up,” I insisted. “Why would I ever do that? You didn’t ask me to give up music.”

  “But that’s not it, Vic. See, I can’t be with someone who doesn’t have—or doesn’t want—magic.”

  He knew. He knew I hadn’t even tried to find him. Shocked, I reverted to accusation.

  I squinted at him. “Is this a snobbish ‘you’re just a pet’ thing again?”

  He coughed faintly, peering at his feet. When he raised his head again to look at me, his eyes were a deep, shining red. But around his neck, he was now wearing a heavy golden chain, with a ludicrous huge golden trinket attached to it. He looked like a cheesy rapper. He was reverting to Circus Management at full speed now, I realized in horror. Retreating from the fight.

  “This is what I am,” he sa
id, showing me in one gesture his abominable suit, his crazy wig, and now the giant sparkly butterfly sunglasses he’d sprouted in the last seconds. “If you decide you need to forget about magic, and you’re not in on the secret anymore, this is what you’ll see. And I don’t think you even like that guy.”

  Oh, dear. He thought I was rejecting him. And in a way, I was.

  “Please,” he said. “Won’t you really try to find me again?”

  I nearly caved then. He was just asking that I see him for what he was. I got that.

  But I really didn’t want a relationship tainted by magic. I didn’t want to spend my life wondering if what I felt was real or if it was magic-induced. In fact, I wasn’t sure I wanted anything to do with that terrifying world full of flesh-eating spells, tortuous plots, and weird power grabs, and endless nights under the moon, without any sunrise to break them, ever. Sure, we could both make efforts. But in the end, it was never going to work. Something bad would happen, I would hold his world for responsible, and he would take it for himself.

  He shook his head, frustrated. We were clearly at an impasse. We couldn’t have the best of both worlds and still make it work. None of us thought it was sustainable.

  “Maybe I’m too proud,” I said, choking up. “I don’t want to be a pet or a magical artifact. I want to be appreciated for what I chose to be, and I want to be able to reciprocate that sentiment.”

  “I get it,” Tristan said. “In fact, you have no idea how much I get that.”

  My eyes stung and my throat was closing up. This was goodbye. I took a step towards him. I decided not to tell him I’d left the pendulum at his place. I didn’t want him to remember me as the one who hadn’t wanted anything to do with his world.

  So, to erase that conversation as best I could, I rose up on my toes and kissed him on the cheek. He was ice-cold.

  “Have a nice life,” I said. “The nicest possible life. Will you do that for me?”

  He nodded. He didn’t answer. Maybe he couldn’t. I knew I had trouble forming words, and I didn’t want to cry now.

  We didn’t hug, and we certainly didn’t kiss. Instead, I just gave him his car keys back. He took a step backwards, his eyes never leaving mine. I noticed the purple cowboy boots on his feet and laughed, but it came out as a sob.

  At the last second, I opened my mouth to cave, say yes to anything, accept life as a part-time pet with all the dangers it entailed, the Hughes and the Doras, as long as Tristan was in it.

  I think he’d seen it coming. He’d been holding his car keys, probably planning to drive back to his faraway castle. But as I drew a quick breath in order to finally surrender, he just disappeared, and I couldn’t go back on my decision. It was too late now. He was gone.

  I stood there for a while, stunned. It had all happened so fast. And I couldn’t believe how heartbroken this left me. I knew what I wanted, yet going through with it felt like cutting off my own limb. But reviewing our conversation now, I knew there wasn’t a moment where I would have chosen differently. It was hard, but it was the truth.

  Gradually, the pain subsided to a more normal heartache level. Moonlight really helped. For a second I even pretended I was back in the realm, and instead of dull, flat fields, I was looking at an ancient forest full of magic and mystery.

  Then a cow woke up and called in the darkness, breaking the spell. I looked at my left palm again, all scarred and rough from my fight in the cellar, and vowed never to forget. I didn’t need the easy way out. I didn’t need to gloss over trauma and let unhappy things sink into oblivion. I was an artist, dammit. I wanted to hold on to everything, even if it was painful, and as long as I had these scars, I was going to remember.

  This decision brought a tiny amount of peace back into my soul. I pushed my damaged hand into my pocket to protect it from the cold and slowly went back to the barn, to see if I could wring out a song from this whole fiasco.

  WHAT? Noooooo.

  Of course it's not the end. Victoire and the band, Tristan and many more characters from the realms will return in book 2 of the Stag Heart Pendulum series, Heart Hunting Magic.

  You want to know what's in those woods? Stay tuned. We'll get there. I don't think that breakup is going to hold, either.

  If you read in French (who knows?), I have a lot of other books for you to browse while you wait. Check out my website, charlottemunich.com. I have a couple (Mwahahaha, insert mad cackle here) other series going. I’ll also keep writing books in English for better or worse.

  And if you feel like getting emails in English from me—with updates, release dates, free short stories, and random news from my incredibly glamorous author life in Paris—you can sign up here.

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  Also by Charlotte Munich

  STAG HEART PENDULUM SERIES

  Moonlight Binding Magic (Book 1)

  Heart Hunting Magic (Book 2), 11/30/2021

  RUSSIAN WITCHES OF CALIFORNIA SERIES

  Maze Demon (12/28/2021)

  Check out my other books in English and in French on my website: www.charlottemunich.com