by Ava Alise
Kelsa’s tears soak through my shirt as she sobs, fighting to catch her breath. “I tried, Drex, I really tried,” she says.
“I know,” I say, kissing her forehead. Suddenly, she stills and pulls away from me.
Her hazel eyes are bloodshot and that terror-ridden expression is back. “Drex. How do you know her?”
I move away from her, running my hand over my head. How in the fuck am I going to tell her this?
“She’s… I’ve known her all of my life.”
“How?” she says.
“Our mothers have been best friends since they were kids. I grew up with Tara and Liam,” I say.
Her eyes are wide with disbelief as she places a hand on her forehead and takes a seat on the couch. “Liam?” she asks.
“Yeah,” I say as I exhale a deep breath and sit next to her. “We’ve always called William by his nickname, Liam. That’s why I didn’t put the pieces together until you said his last name.”
She takes a deep breath, but stays quiet, seemingly mulling over my words. I’m trying not to fucking lose it. This is not going to go over well with my family, but there is no way in hell I’m walking away from her. All this time we’ve had it wrong. William really needed help and found a way to hide it from everyone… everyone but her.
“So you knew about me and William? You had to,” she says.
“No… well, I knew what happened, of course. And about you, but I didn’t know who you were. After Liam’s dad died, we all knew he was grieving, but he always found a way to pull it together around us. It never seemed like he was depressed, or even drinking. Just sad… missing his father like we all were.”
“So that’s why Tara is convinced I drove him to it,” she says.
“Yes. From the outside, it looked like he was kicked while he was already down, and you were the straw that broke him,” I say. Kelsa’s eyes shift from mine and it looks like she’s trying to stop herself from crying again. “But everyone was blinded by grief. No one stopped to think about what you went through. I’m sorry for that.”
“Oh,” she says, quietly biting her lip.
“Tara harassed me for months,” she says, blowing out a shaky breath. “She forced me to leave the hospital that night only to leave me threatening emails and nasty voicemails. She hates me, all of you do.”
“You know I don’t hate you.”
“But everyone you love does. I know how close your family is, Drex.”
She’s right. We are close. I can not remember a time in my life when my mother didn’t have her best friend right beside her. My grandmother used to call them “double take” when they were kids and she still does to this day. Even though we aren’t technically related, I always referred to Liam and Tara’s mother as “aunt,” as they did mine. With all the loss we've had to endure, our already tight knit family became even tighter.
“Well, they are wrong.” I say. Her eyes fall to the floor. “I meant what I said earlier, Kels. I’m crazy about you and I’m not worried about this mess with my family.”
Kelsa’s quiet, too quiet, and it takes me a moment to realize how far she has inched away. Words get caught in my throat as I try to speak again. I want to smooth it over, find a way to make her feel comfortable, but the look in her eyes tell me her thoughts are far away.
“It was a nightmare,” she whispers, wrapping her arms around her body. I know it was. My heart feels heavy. During the time I’ve gotten to know Kelsa, it doesn’t seem like much could rock her. She has always been so confident, solid. Even when everyone in the office was worried about the merger, she always seemed steady. But this… this has her shaken. She’s terrified, and for a moment, I wonder if I’m doing more harm than good for wanting to be with her, asking her to face the one thing that will shift her foundation. Especially considering everything else I need to tell her. I look down at the piece of paper Tara gave me before she stormed out, still fisted in my hand. I slide it into my shirt pocket.
We sit in silence for a while. Longer than I realize. My mind is racing when she speaks again. It sounds extremely loud in the quiet space.
“I worked so hard to put it all past me. But this…” her gaze moves to mine. “This is… a lot.”
“Yeah.” I exhale a shaky breath. “You should sleep here tonight. It's getting late,” I say, knowing it's total bullshit. It's really not that late, but for some reason, I’m afraid that if she leaves, it will mark the end. I'm not ready for this to end, but I totally understand her hesitation to commit. Damn, what she and Liam went through would be enough to make anyone think twice before jumping into a relationship. Asking her to be with me would be like asking her to rip open a wound.
I don't know, am I being selfish?
Her eyes are glued to the floor and I stifle a groan as I run a hand down my face as a small crinkling sound reaches my ears.
My stomach immediately drops and I feel like the paper is burning a hole in my pocket. Maybe I am being selfish. Dealing with our jobs being on the line is bad enough, but now this. Plus, if this paper says what I think it does, everything will be that much harder for us.
“No. I… think I need time,” she says, breaking me out of my thoughts.
“Ok.”
“Plus, I don't want the first night we spend together to be like… this,” she says. “Not including Miami, of course.”
I nod slightly as a brief wave of relief floods through me. I was beginning to think she wanted to get as far away from me as possible. The fact that she's still open to the possibility of us gives me hope, at least for now.
She lingers for a beat before she stands and grabs her purse and we head for the door. The air shifts between us, leaving a heaviness in its wake as we walk silently toward my car. The December air is frigid and I have to stop myself from wrapping my arm over her shoulder.
How in the fuck am I going to tell my family about Kelsa? Will they ever accept her? If they don't, will it be something she's willing to live with? Am I?
Kelsa stays quiet. She absentmindedly fingers her hair as we drive through the dark roads toward her apartment. Every time I open my mouth to speak, I choke on my words. I have no idea what to say and she barely makes eye contact with me during the trip. How did things go south so quickly?
What seems like an eternity of silence passes by and eventually I pull up to her building. She sighs and brings those hazels to meet my eyes for the first time since we left my apartment. My heart hollows.
“I hope you're not mad I didn't want to stay over,” she says, uncertainty dripping from her words.
“No.” I blow out a breath. “We probably need a minute to digest all of this.”
“Yeah,” she says softly, dropping her gaze again. I hate seeing her so shaken and feeling like there is nothing I can do about it.
We fall into another awkward silence as my car hums quietly. Her gaze slides from the door of her building down to her fingers. She's hesitating, we both are. There is so much to say but no way to start. The small folded paper is searing a hole through my pocket as I watch Kelsa reach for the door handle.
“What a night,” she says, forcing a smile.
“Yeah.” I smirk.
I hate to see her leave like this, but the only way to know if we have a chance is to find out what we are dealing with.
“I'll call you, ok?” she says.
“Have a good night, baby,” I tell her, and she walks away.
I watch as she disappears through the door of her building, and the moment she's out of sight, I snatch the paper from my pocket.
Ok, it was one time. One stupid fucking drunken mistake.
Slowly, I unfold the small square revealing an ultrasound. At first it all looks like a bunch of weird shadows and circles, until my eyes fall on the only thing that matters. The only thing that may make or break any chance I have with the girl I'm so wrapped up in I can barely think straight. The only thing that will change my life and the entire dynamic of my family.
One
thing.
Estimated date of conception.
I hope you enjoyed this novella and if so please leave a quick review. It helps us authors out tremendously. Be on the lookout for Dirty Flirting: Part Two coming early 2018. This story is just beginning and you will not want to miss what happens next. I love these characters and I hope you enjoyed part one of this story as much as I enjoyed writing it.
If you like my crazy ass writing then while you wait for Dirty Flirting: Part Two, be on the lookout for the bonus book in this series. It’s titled Love’s Ache and follows Chris, Kelsa’s youngest brother.
In Love’s Ache, you will learn all about Chris, how he balance’s being a young play boy and a single father and how he handles the emotional mind fuck that his ex puts him through. You will also meet Liz who’s dealing with some pretty hard knocks in life and happens to meet Chris and the right place and the naughtiest time.
For all up to date information on me and my crazy, you can find me here:
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Newsletter
There are so many people that helped me see this series come to publication. First and always I want to thank my father, the Creator of all who guided me to this passion. My amazing husband who has been my support and my inspiration in this journey. From the late nights when I would keep him up talking about plot ideas, to the moments he'd find me overwhelmed and chase me around the house with Nerf guns. I love you, my best friend, my rock. To my sissy Kina and brother Charles, my voice of reason and Mr. Chaoz himself, thank you for all the help and motivation you have given me through this journey.
I also want to thank my PA Sara. Girl, you have worked your ass off and have quickly become one of my dearest friends. Tania, you have been amazing as well and you and Sara are the dynamic duo that I'd be lost without. My writing buddy Henry, where would I be without your ‘rule of the day’ emails. To all of my betas who have helped push me through edits, I thank you. To Nicole and Liv, thanks ladies, without you that cover would have never seen the light. Last but not least I want to thank my #squadpod. Nic, Lacie, JL, Paige, Cl, Harloe, Jessica. Ladies… let’s do this!
Thank you to all of my readers, you are everything. I love you.
