Seated to the hilt, he felt huge. Filling her completely, leaving not a single inch of her internal flesh untouched.
When his hand reached forward, finding her clit, she thought she would die of pleasure. The look of love shining from his hazel eyes added to the intensity level causing her heart to ache.
Honor had no time to think of what it meant to be taken in such a way by a man like Sean O’Malley. She didn’t have time to realize that there would never be another man in her life, in her bed, because a forceful sensation started tingling throughout her body.
“Oh, oh, shit!” she gasped. “Ohmygod, ohmygod…yes!” It came out part hiss, part scream as her body erupted. Sean had brought her to many mind-numbing orgasms, but this—this was so much more in so many ways.
She had no control over her body. Her back arched pulling him deeper into her. He was so big that she could feel every inch of him, every vein and ridge of his throbbing shaft as it remained buried deep inside of her.
She could feel him slowly pulling out of her body. It clutched and grasped in response. His movement stopped with just the tip of him still inside her. That part of him was broader than the rest causing a slight burn in the muscles surrounding her entrance.
His look was intimidating as she watched in the mirror. His eyes were hooded, his lids lowered until she almost couldn’t see the color of his irises.
Sweat beaded on his bald head, his hands grasped her hips tightly. Something flashed across his face an instant before he lunged into her causing the air to be forced from her lungs.
His body stilled against hers, a growl erupting from deep within his broad muscled chest, then she felt the warmth as his semen filled her.
His penis throbbed and jerked with its release sending her over the edge and back into oblivion. Her plea for mercy rent the air just as he leaned forward wrapping one arm around her waist, his head a heavy weight on her back.
When he finally moved, she groaned. She didn’t want him to leave her, but knew he must if she ever planned to walk straight again. That thought brought a smile to her mouth.
Her smile completely faded as he pulled from her body. A gasp found its way through her lips before she could hold it back.
“You okay, Little Darlin’?” he asked, genuine concern in his voice.
Honor nodded. She was sore, but in a good way. Now she just needed to figure out how in the world to look the man in the eye after she’d just had anal sex over a bar with him. Her whole body was probably blushing at the thought.
When she turned to leave, wanting to find her clothes, he snagged her arm.
“Not again!” he thundered. “I won’t let you shut me out again, Honor. Now get your clothes on. We’re going home and in the morning we are going to talk.”
Her eyes narrowed to slits at his retreating back. It was then that she realized he had never even removed his clothes. She covered her face and groaned.
Praying for patience with the overbearing man who believed he loved her, she dressed and waited until he came back into the room. Then without so much as a word, she was herded to his vehicle and driven to his house.
As they reached his house, she idly wondered if she should lay into him now or save it for tomorrow when she was rested.
Chapter Thirteen
He fought the need to shake her. She’d tried to slip out of his grasp again and he just wouldn’t allow it. In order to retain what was left of his composure, Sean kept quiet on the drive home.
She was glaring blue daggers in his direction—it was actually a bit amusing. He wondered if she would do something to warrant another spanking before the night was over. He certainly hoped so.
Sean watched the road, but out the corner of his eye, he watched as Honor sat stiffly beside him staring out the side window.
She might be stubborn but he was determined, and there was no way in hell he was letting her out of his sight before he knew just what was bothering her.
Once that was finished, he would insist that she stay with him, for good, as his wife. And if she refused…well…he didn’t want to think about that.
When he had her safely in his home, he turned to her. The weary look in her eyes and the slouch of her shoulders spoke of her inner turmoil, as well as the exhaustion her body felt.
He wanted to know, but wasn’t willing to push—at least not tonight. “Come on, sweetheart.”
He grasped her hand, tugging her along behind him. In his room, the door securely closed, he began to undress her. Removing first her snug-fitting blouse and then the drawstring pants she seemed to favor.
“Sean?” she questioned.
He could see the hesitancy in her eyes and smiled a crooked smile in return. “Just to sleep, Honor. I just want to hold you next to me while you sleep.”
She seemed to melt within his arms. Her body relaxed instantly at his words. He couldn’t quite figure out if that was a good thing or not.
Once he had peeled every garment from her body, he scooped her into his arms, holding her close to his heart for the briefest of moments before laying her on the bed.
He imagined the clean cotton sheets felt cool against her skin and hastily discarded his clothes to join her. Pulling her close to his body in spoon fashion, her back to his front, they quickly drifted off to sleep.
It seemed as though he had only been asleep for a few minutes when something woke him. Honor was no longer in his arms, or even close to him. Her thrashing body was completely on the other side of his king-sized bed.
She was struggling against an unknown force calling out as if in pain. Her keening moan sent shivers down his spine. Tears were streaming down her face even as her eyes stayed tightly closed. It tore at his heart to see her this way.
Whatever was bothering her was taking an emotional toll on her.
She’d had many restless nights recently and even a few bad dreams she’d insisted she didn’t remember, but nothing of this extent. The thought that she’d been suffering alone or didn’t trust him enough to tell him what was wrong drove Sean crazy.
No wonder she looked tired and had been short-tempered and restless.
Just then, she let out an ear-piercing scream. “Nooo! Oh, God, please!” she sobbed in her sleep.
Sean pulled her into his arms needing to feel her soft, warm flesh against his. “Honor,” he called to her. When she didn’t answer, only thrashed in his arms fighting his hold, his tone became more firm. “Honor! Darlin’, wake up. Please, baby. Wake up.” The last came out a ragged whispered plea.
Her body stilled, her lids fluttering for a second before they opened. He could see her confusion as she gazed up at him. It only lasted a moment before she buried her face into the crook of his neck and broke down.
Her whole body shook uncontrollably. Her sobbing breaths filled the air and made him want to kill whoever had hurt her. He couldn’t imagine what she’d been through to cause so much pain but if there were anything he could do to make it better, it would be done.
“Honor? Tell me what it is. Let me help,” he pleaded with her.
She lifted her head the slightest bit as she tried to regain her composure but it was no use.
“Please, baby. Don’t cry. Oh, God, Honor. Please tell me.” He could no longer hide his own misery. His chest ached with it. To see the woman who was a part of him suffering left him in doubt of his strength.
What if he couldn’t handle what she told him? What would he do if her secret was so horrible that he could not deal with it?
* * * * *
His chest felt so good against her as her body fought the memories the dreams always seemed to force on her. No longer would she be able to hold back the truth and she knew it.
When the disturbing images faded, Honor lifted her head and dried her eyes. There was nothing easy about it, but it had to be done.
She sat back until she was no longer enveloped within the warmth of Sean’s arms and then she sought out his face.
His eyes were tortu
red and red as if he himself had been experiencing her pain.
Was it possible to care so deeply for someone that you could feel what they felt? It was, and with that startling realization, Honor knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that she was deeply, irreversibly in love with Sean O’Malley, and she cursed a silent blue streak for allowing it to happen.
Squaring her shoulders, she looked him in the eye and began. She told him everything from how she had oohed and aahed over the new car, bothering her parents daily about it, to how she had felt when the police had showed up at her door to break the news of the accident. She cried through an explanation about how, as a teenager, she had personally blamed herself and how that even now she sometimes couldn’t help but wonder if things would be different had she not begged with every breath for a car.
Before she had finished, she’d broken eye contact. She just couldn’t stand to see the pity on his face as he gazed back at her.
When the bed dipped then immediately sprang back after releasing his weight, her heart dropped. Willing herself to stay strong only lasted until she heard the soft click of a door closing. It was as she had thought, and she hated herself for not telling him earlier.
If only she had been able to keep her heart locked tightly away, then she could have avoided the misery she was feeling. Her shoulders shook, but this time she grieved quietly.
So caught up in the torment coursing through her, Honor didn’t hear when Sean opened the door and made his way into the room.
It wasn’t until the mattress once again dipped with the extra weight that she lifted her head, prepared for the worst only to feel the warm moisture of a washcloth make its way over her face.
“I’m so sorry, Little Darlin’. You shouldn’t have had to go through all of that. I didn’t know it at the time you came to live in Texas with your aunt.” His eyes were suspiciously bright as he held her chin giving him better access to her tear-stained face.
He continued with his gentle cleansing as he spoke. “Never doubt for a minute that your parents loved you just as you love them. It doesn’t end when they’re gone, baby, just as my love for you will never end. Nothing about the accident was your fault, Honor. It was an accident and if I have to, I’ll remind you of that fact daily.”
“I know they loved me, Sean. This time of year is just so hard and even though I know better, I feel as though I have to find a way to forgive myself all over again.”
Sean looked at her, his hazel eyes filled with emotion. “There is nothing to forgive, Honor. You were a child excited about a gift. What happened was not your fault.” His voice was rough, yet stern.
“I don’t know what to think anymore, Sean. I just don’t know.” Honor’s voice broke and once again, tears streamed down her face. “I do so good all year but I didn’t realize just how alone I was until my aunt died and I came back to Texas.”
Sean’s arms closed around her, tight and comforting. “You don’t have to know, Little Darlin’, you just have to let go. It’s not going to come easy but it will come, and just in case you’ve got doubts, I’ll be right here to make sure you see it happen. You’re not in this alone, Honor. You’ll never be alone again.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.”
Sean looked at her as if he was trying to figure out what she meant. The question in his eyes prodded her on.
“I’ve never let myself love, Sean. I’m not so sure I could survive such a loss again.”
“Oh, Darlin’,” Sean murmured, gathering her in his arms. “We can’t choose who we love, it just happens. I can’t change the way I feel about you, Honor, and I won’t even try. To do so would be a disservice to the both of us.”
This time she looked into his hazel eyes, really looked. They were bright with his love, gold flecks intermingled within their depths and she knew she was home. No more wandering. No more hiding, she’d finally made it. She was exactly where she belonged.
With a nod of her head, she moved forward placing a tender kiss upon his lips. Backing away, she stared into his eyes. “I love you, Sean O’Malley, with all my heart. Will you marry me?”
His big body tensed, a wide smile crossed his face as a lone tear trickled down his cheek.
“I never thought you’d ask, Little Darlin’,” he gruffly answered, kissing her until she thought she’d collapse from sheer excitement and lack of air.
He then proceeded to show her just how much he truly loved her. Very slowly, and long into the night, until they finally drifted off to sleep just before dawn.
Chapter Fourteen
The next few days were extremely hectic, but they had made it through Honor’s birthday, just the two of them. The day had been spent loving each other and talking.
It had taken some coaxing, but he’d managed to get her to share some of the good memories she’d kept deeply buried. They’d laughed and cried, and beyond all that, they’d loved, over and over until they lay, bodies sated within the twisted and tangled sheets of the bed.
With a proud pitch to his voice, Sean announced their news to Zane and Hayden. Both were ecstatic as was Zane’s fiancée Serena. There was already talk of a double wedding.
Sean wasn’t sure he was willing to wait that long, but once he saw the look on Honor’s face, he bit his tongue. If it would make her happy, he’d do it.
Several times during the past week, Serena had been by to visit with Honor. It was nice to see the two of them together.
He’d even managed to make a trip with her to meet his father. Zane and Serena had gone along with them. It was a tense few minutes early on in the meeting, but things had really changed with the old man.
It still seemed strange. It had been an ongoing battle since as far back as he could remember. His father, Colin O’Malley, had wanted his sons to follow in his footsteps, and as a result of his persistence, had pretty much alienated all three of them. During the normal course of things Sean and his brothers would go to their father’s for Christmas supper, but other than that, the occasional phone call was all that passed between them.
It really was a shame, but after the last meeting, Sean was in hopes that all of that would change. As a matter of fact, he was almost sure it would. The look on his father’s face when Honor and Serena had asked him to give them away had been one of surprise. Joy had quickly taken over and before the four of them left, laughter had filled the room.
It was amazing what love could conquer.
It was Friday night. Sean frowned when Hayden walked into the bar with a scowl plastered across his face. His mood was surly at best, and Sean could imagine just who had put him in such a mood.
He’d bet a free round for the bar that a short woman with sparkling green eyes had something to do with it. This could be fun, he thought, as Hayden stomped to the bar and parked himself on a stool.
“Beer?” Sean asked.
“Hell, no,” his brother replied. “Whiskey, make it a double.” He looked as if he were ready to commit murder.
“Problem?” He was doing his best not to laugh, but it was getting harder by the minute.
“None of your damned business!” Hayden growled at him, throwing back the glass of whiskey in one fell swoop.
Sean studied his brother for a split second before deciding that there really was something bothering him.
“Aw, hell, Hayden, it can’t be that bad,” he said, trying to lighten the mood. Instead, he received a narrowed look.
“That damned woman is going to be the death of me. She’s driving me crazy and I can’t even fire her. How’s that for stuck?”
Hayden seemed truly flustered and Sean couldn’t stop from asking.
“What did Austin do this time?” He knew it was Austin because there wasn’t another soul on earth who would dare push Hayden to the point of heavy drinking and get away with it.
Pouring his brother another drink, he crossed his arms over the bulk of his chest and waited. It didn’t take long.
“She’s doing another one of thos
e damned parties tonight. I told her I didn’t like her doing it, but do you think she’d listen?”
Without waiting for a reply, he continued on with his tirade. “Hell, no! She told me I had no say in what she did after hours. The thing that really chaps my ass is that she’s right. God dammit! I’d like to throttle the brat with my bare hands.”
Sean hadn’t heard much past the point where Hayden said Austin was hosting a party tonight.
“Did you say Austin’s party was tonight?”
Hayden pinned him with a dark look. “As if you didn’t know,” he snarled.
“How in the hell would I know? And when is the party because Austin was supposed to be getting together with Honor and Serena tonight? That’s why Honor isn’t here.”
With another look from Hayden, Sean wiped his brow and cursed. “Oh, hell, no.” He pulled the apron from his waist and strode around the bar. Thank God, I have trustworthy employees, he thought as he hollered over his shoulder that he was leaving and wouldn’t be back to close. He’d end up paying some overtime but it would be worth every single cent.
“Where?” was the single worded question. Sean was afraid he knew the answer even as he asked the question. Every hair on the back of his neck stood at attention. If his hunch was right, Honor, Serena and Austin were holed up at his place with a bunch of giggling women with dildos. Sean didn’t have time to think on it much before Hayden started bitching again.
“How in the hell should I know? Austin slammed the door in my face before I could ask.”
Sean wanted to laugh at Hayden’s disgruntled voice. Hell, he couldn’t care less if Honor wanted to go to one of those adult-toy parties, but he’d be damned if she was going to get away with sneaking it by him.
It was Austin The Hellion he didn’t trust. No telling what that woman would talk Honor into doing or buying.
Come to think of it, the buying part wasn’t too bad as long as he got to use them on her, with her. It might not all be bad, but he was certainly going to enjoy laying into her ass. There would be no sneaking behind his back and she’d learn it soon enough.
O'Malley Wild: Honoring Sean Page 9
