by Hamel, B. B.
In that moment, I know what I have to do. I hate it, but I can’t keep pretending. Olivia was right about everything she said, and it’s time that I embraced it.
I’ve been so afraid of losing my daughter, but I’m not losing her. I know I’m not going to. David would never take her away like that, even if he did threaten me. He has the money and the power to pull it off, but I can’t believe he’d actually do that to me.
No, I have nothing to lose. But I do have something to gain.
20
David
I feel like my heart’s been broken again, but this time I know it’s my own damn fault.
I’m depressed for a week. I try and distract myself with work and I even start writing some code again, but nothing really helps. Olivia keeps hovering in my office, trying to give me new tasks to keep me distracted, but it’s just not the same.
I keep thinking about Emma, and Julie. She’s not coming into work, and Sven was pissed at first. He calmed down when I put him in charge of the project, although he wasn’t too happy when I refused to cancel it entirely. I know it doesn’t really work without Emma’s insight, but I’m not ready to give up on her completely. Besides, Olivia said we should keep that project open, so it was an easy decision.
It’s just like last time, all those years ago. I forgot about Kelly and that damn fucking engagement, but now it’s all back, and it’s worse. The world seems colorless.
I’m being a fucking baby.
One week after Emma stops coming to work, I try and get my shit together. It’s Monday and I’m burying my head in work. The Mark 2 is practically ready, and now it’s just a matter of giving it my final approval. I wanted to wait for Emma’s team to finish their algorithm, but I realize now that it’s not going to happen.
It’s time to accept that the Mark 2 is as good as it’s going to be and release it into the world. I know it’s going to change people’s lives, since it’s an improved and less expensive version. It’s more accessible, and I think it’s going to finally usher self-driving cars into the mainstream.
I just wish I had someone to share all this with.
My intercom buzzes. “Yes?”
“Olivia here for you,” Lucy says.
“Send her in.”
Olivia comes through the door a minute later, a strange smile on her lips. “Remember the other day when you were saying I never do any favors for you?”
I give her a strange look. “Uh, what?”
“Well, remember that, okay?”
“What are you talking about?”
She’s practically grinning and I get a really bad feeling. Olivia never smiles like this. “Just don’t forget who set this up,” she says, and my intercom buzzes again.
“Emma May here for you, David.”
I stare at Olivia. “What did you do?” I ask her.
Olivia just shakes her head, practically giddy with excitement, which is totally bizarre.
“Send her in,” I tell Lucy.
Emma comes into the room a minute later. Olivia slips away without another word, leaving Emma alone with me.
I stand up as she approaches. She’s wearing that cream blouse that I really like again and a park of dark slacks. She stops in front of my desk and takes a deep breath.
“David, I’m sorry.”
I blink, surprised. “You’re… sorry?”
“I’m sorry,” she says again. “There’s something you should know.”
“Emma, wait. I’m just happy you’re here.” I start to come around toward her, but she puts her hands up.
“No, please. Let me get this out, okay?”
“Okay,” I say, and slowly sit back down in my chair.
She sits in the chair across from me. “I’ve been lying to you, too,” she says finally.
“You have?” I’m at a total loss now.
“David, I can’t get pregnant.”
She lets that sink in and I stare at her, totally fucking confused. “Uh, Emma, I mean, you did already, right?”
“Yes,” she says, a little frustrated frown on her lips. “But Julie… well, the doctors told me that she was a one-in-a-million chance, and it would never happen again.”
I stare at her, blinking. “How? I mean, what?”
She takes another deep breath and lets it out. “I was lying from the start, David. Julie was a freak thing, and I can’t really have babies. It doesn’t matter that you got that procedure done… I couldn’t get pregnant anyway. And I knew it from the start.”
I stare at her, totally taken aback. It’s like a bombshell and I really didn’t see it coming.
I slowly shake my head, trying to understand, but it’s like I’m running in circles. “So you got pregnant,” I say slowly, “but you can’t get pregnant again?”
“Pretty much,” she says. “That first time was a miracle, basically. And I knew that entering into the contract.”
It suddenly clicks. “That’s why you wanted that clause… to get money, even if you never got pregnant.”
“Right,” she says, nodding. “I knew I wouldn’t get pregnant, so I had to find a way to still get money.”
“And I was too stupid to realize,” I say, laughing. “I just figured you were guarding against some unlikely thing or whatever.”
“Nope,” she says. “I was just making sure I’d get money, even though I was lying to you.”
I stare at her, and slowly I feel something in my chest. It bubbles up and I can’t control it. I start laughing, shaking my head.
“Holy shit,” I say. “This is insane.”
I start laughing harder, and now I really do feel like a crazy person. At first, Emma looks at me like I’m about to jump out the window, but slowly she starts laughing along.
God, it feels so fucking good to laugh with her like this. The whole situation is so fucking absurd, all because we couldn’t just talk to each other. I have to create this elaborate way to get close to her, and in the process we both lied about pretty much the same thing.
Slowly though, our laughter dies down. She’s smiling at me as I lean back and stretch a little.
“I’m really sorry that I got mad at you,” she says. “I was being a hypocrite.”
“It’s okay,” I say. “Honestly, it really is. I’m just glad we have this all out in the open.”
“I didn’t mean to string you along. I know… I know you really do want a family.”
I nod slowly, my smile fading. “I wasn’t lying about that,” I say.
“I know you weren’t.” She’s staring down at the floor, not saying anything, and my heart starts racing.
She slowly looks up at me again. “She’s yours, David. Julie’s your daughter.”
Those are the words I’ve been waiting for all this time. My heart’s racing and I can’t help but smile big. Julie’s my daughter, my perfect baby daughter. And on top of that, she was a miracle, the kind of baby that defies science completely. I don’t know how we did this, but we created a miracle together.
“Thank you,” I say softly. “I’ve been waiting to hear that.”
“What are you going to do now?” she asks.
“Nothing,” I say. “She’s your daughter, and I’m a total stranger to her. I just… I’d like to be a part of her life.”
“Okay,” she says, sighing. “We can do that.”
“Slowly,” I say quickly. “You don’t have to tell her anything at first. But eventually… I’d like her to know, if you’re okay with that.”
“I will be,” she says. “I won’t pretend like it doesn’t scare the hell out of me. She’s been my whole world for so long now, and you’re… well, you’re you.”
“What does that mean?”
“You’re rich and famous and handsome and smart and I’m terrified you’ll take her from me.”
I shake my head, although I can’t help but smile. “I promise, she’ll always be your daughter first and foremost, before anything else.”
“I know,” sh
e says. “I’m just being stupid.”
“You’re not being stupid,” I say. “We just need to start being honest with each other.”
“You’re right,” she says.
“Good.” I take a breath and let it out, laughing again. I’m full of nervous energy and I don’t know how to release it all. “You’re coming back to work, right?”
“I hope so,” She says. “If it’s okay with you.”
“It’s okay with me,” I say. “We’re launching the Mark 2 in the next few weeks.”
“Really?” She perks up. “That’s amazing.”
“Your algorithm isn’t going to make it into the final model. But there are always updates.”
“Yeah,” she says, grinning at me. “Always updates.”
I watch her beautiful face for what feels like an hour although it’s maybe just a few seconds. She’s gorgeous and I feel so much happier than I ever have before. Julie’s my daughter, and Emma’s my… something, I don’t know what yet. I do know one thing, though.
I know I love this woman.
I get up from my chair and walk around my desk. She watches me as I approach. I crouch down in front of her and put my hand on her cheek and she leans into it, turning her head slightly.
“I missed you,” I say.
“I missed you too.”
I lean forward and kiss her, and for the first time since we started all of this, there’s nothing else behind it. This is just a kiss, free of any contracts or lies or half-truths. This is just a kiss because I want to kiss her, need to taste her, nothing beyond that.
We slowly break apart. “We should void that contract,” I say softly.
“Well, maybe not just yet.” Her eyes are bright and gleaming, and I feel something stir inside of me.
“You want me to take advantage of you one more time,” I say softly, moving toward her, lips against her ear.
“Yes, please, boss,” she whispers back.
I pull her out of her seat and push her up against my desk. She leans back and wraps her legs around my waist as we kiss, full and hungry and equal. I need her so badly that it almost fucking hurts, and there’s nothing in the world that can stop me now.
21
Emma
I finally feel free to actually give myself to this man the way I’ve been wanting to so badly ever since this all started. Everything’s out in the open and there’s nothing standing in the way of what we want.
Except I don’t know what he wants, not really. All I know is how good it feels when he touches me. I pull him closer, tightening my legs around his waist, my hands in his hair as he kisses me deep and slow.
This is so familiar, and yet it’s all new. We’ve been doing this in his office for a while now, except this is the first time I feel like it means something more than just sex. I feel like I’m admitting to him what I really feel, even if I’m not saying it.
He slowly unbuttons my blouse, careful with the delicate buttons. When it’s open, he reaches around to unhook my bra, teasing my breasts with his practiced hands. My nipples are hard and I’m ringing with desire. His lips find my neck and a small moan escapes his lips.
“It feels different this time,” he whispers as he pushes me back onto my elbows.
“How?” I ask.
He unbuttons my slacks and slowly slides them off my ass. I push my hips forward as he gets them off.
“I can’t explain it,” he says. “But it’s like this is the first time.”
I sit up straight up and pull him against me, kissing him harder, passion flowing through me. I know exactly what he means. I feel it too. It’s like we’ve never done this before, or at least we never did it properly and now we’re finally going to be able to explore each other in the way I’ve always wanted and needed.
I gasp into his kiss as I feel his hands find my wet pussy. I groan a little, grinding into his fingers, and I kiss him harder. I want to taste him so badly it almost hurts as I move my hips along with his skilled fingers.
He pushes my panties aside as he teases my clit before sliding his fingers inside me. I groan and pull back from the kiss finally, dipping my head back as he kisses my throat and neck. I groan as he kisses my breasts and fucks my pussy with his fingers. I writhe against him, pleasure overwhelming any good sense as my moans get louder.
He smirks as he kisses me one more time before stepping back. He unbuckles his belt and pulls down his slacks. I stand up and lean against him, kissing his neck, before he turns and pushes me up against his filing cabinet.
I take his cock in both hands and stroke him as he kisses me. He grunts his pleasure and I feel his fingers working my clit, rubbing in intense circles as I move my hips along with him. I don’t know how much longer I can take this teasing but he doesn’t seem to be in a rush.
He grabs my hips and turns me around suddenly. I gasp as he spreads my legs, hands on my hips. He leans over me and I can feel his hot breath against my ear.
“This is how we should’ve done it from the start,” he says, fingers teasing my pussy, his other hand wrapping through my hair.
“How?” I groan.
“Everything in the open, completely honest.”
“We couldn’t,” I say, and I realize it’s true. “There was too much.”
“Not anymore.” His grip in my hair tightens and I feel him move back slightly.
“Not anymore,” I echo and look over my shoulder as he presses his cock deep inside of me.
I groan, head tipped back, and he plunges himself deeper. His size makes me gasp, surprising me all over again how easily he can split me apart. I wiggle my hips as he slides in and out slowly, fucking me deep and sensually. I look over my shoulder again but he pulls my hair, forcing me to turn away as he thrusts all of himself inside of me. I don’t know how I can take him, but it feels incredible, that perfect mix of pleasure and pain that sets every nerve in my skin tingling.
He starts to fuck me faster. His free hand slaps my ass nice and hard as he grips my hair. I move my hips back and forth with him, riding him, taking him deep inside of me. I want to feel him come so badly it almost hurts, but not yet. First, I need to feel him take me.
He groans and leans forward again. “Your pussy is fucking perfect,” he whispers. “Dripping wet and tight. This is why I can’t stop thinking about you.”
“Should’ve fucked me more,” I say in response, and he smirks at me.
“I know that’s what you wanted.” He thrusts hard and slaps my ass. “But you don’t always get what you want.”
I groan. “I’m getting it right now.”
He just smirks again and pulls my hair, fucking me with a new intensity. I gasp and arch my back, forcing his cock deeper and deeper inside of me until I feel like I’m going to break from it all, but I love it. I can’t stop myself. My moans are coming out faster and louder and I know we’ll get caught, but nothing’s going to stop me.
He pulls himself back and drags me back to the desk. He puts me up on my ass and spreads my legs wide. I prop myself back on my elbows and watch as his enormous cock slides deep inside my pussy.
I groan, dipping my head back, as he fucks me again, hands on my hips. He pulls me tight against him as he slams his cock deep into my pussy. I gasp and put one hand on my breast, feeling myself as he fucks me deeper and harder. He puts his hand on my other breast, teasing my pussy, eyes filled with steaming passion.
I move my hips with him and finally I slide all the way onto my back. He pulls me tighter, legs up in the air, and he thrusts harder and harder, making my breasts bounce, making gasping moans escape my lips.
I suddenly feel his thumb start to tease my clit as he fucks me, and I know it’s over for me. I know I can’t take it anymore. I gasp and my fingers find the edge of the desk, pulling myself tighter against him, his cock sliding deeper.
I come as I grip the desk and he fucks me rough and deep. My whole body shakes and quivers with pleasure as it rolls through my skin. It’s intense and incredible
, and his groans only make it even better. I feel him come inside of me only moments later, our orgasms mingling and mixing in the moment, peaking and cresting and slowly subsiding.
He pulls me tight against him, cock sliding out as I stand again. My knees are a little weak and he holds me up, pressing me tight against him.
We don’t speak for a while. I feel him breathing, our bodies intertwined in a tight hug. My heart’s beating so fast and I feel so at peace that I don’t want this moment to end. The sex is incredible with him, but it’s these seconds afterwards that really seem to stretch on into forever. I think it’s because we’re just together, the only two people in our world, alone and floating with pleasure and contentment. It’s too much to bear sometimes, but I love it anyway.
“I’ve been wanting to tell you the truth for a while now,” he says softly. “It’s been killing me, hiding that from you.”
“I know,” I say. “I feel the same way.”
“Where do we go from here?”
I pull back and look up at him. I shrug a little and smile. “Who knows. You tell me. You’re the boss.”
His grin seems genuine and warm. “I know what we have to do.”
“Anything,” I say.
He laughs softly and kisses me.
* * *
One Month Later
The warehouse is more or less how I remembered it, except completely empty.
It’s almost strange, seeing this huge white space with almost nothing inside of it except for some chairs lined up and a large screen dangling from the middle like a jumbotron. There are maybe sixty people here, mostly important higher-ups from Envoy, plus a few of the necessary engineers. I recognize Dirk standing near the control console that’s directly underneath the screens. Olivia’s wandering around, shaking hands and smiling, as I wander around the crowd with a glass of champagne in my hand.
“Beautiful, no?”
