He laughed then, and with unfeigned pleasure. “I have no intention of following his orders. I would, in fact, be very happy to act in direct opposition to them. Don’t you see, that is the very beauty of it? My father has decided I am to marry Barbara. Just imagine how very pleased he would be if I came home with a very different sort of woman. One such as you, Victoria. You have a great independence of spirit, and make no apology for it. I cannot conceive of you allowing the old fellow to lead you about by the nose.”
She scowled, not liking this reply. “I do not wish to marry simply to further exacerbate the rift between you and your father. It is poor reason for such a thing.”
He shook his head, his face filled with remorse. “I have insulted you, and that was not my intent. I would be lying if I said I would not be happy to put the old fellow off his game. That is not the only reason I have asked you to marry me. I believe we would deal very well together. My father is not likely to move aside and allow me to take up the reins of my own inheritance. He very much likes being the one to call out the tune. And I…” He shrugged, gazing off into the darkness. “I am tired of living up to the reputation of being Lord Sin.”
He watched her gasp of surprise. “Oh, yes, I am quite aware of what they call me, and have made every effort to live up to the appellation. I no longer wish to do so.”
She studied him carefully. “How can you be certain? Perhaps you will find living as a country gentleman does not suit you at all, after being ‘Lord Sin.’ For that is what I would ask of any man who marries me. I have no love of parties and social engagements, and miss Briarwood more with each passing day.”
He sighed. “You have no idea how much the notion appeals to me. I would gladly have left all this years ago, but I cannot be my father’s lackey. At Sinclair manor, every decision must be his and his alone.”
She nodded, still watching him. “Then you will understand when I say that the man I marry must also know I will be an equal partner in all decisions. I have been running my father’s estates since his death. I cannot simply hand all that over to someone else blindly. It means too much to me.”
He met her probing gaze without hedging. “Having been put in that very position myself, I could not do that to another, especially you, Victoria. I have come to respect and admire you in the time we have known one another.” His gaze dipped lower. “And I would only be honest in telling you that I find you quite beautiful.”
Suddenly Victoria found herself overcome by the realization that this was real, that Ian Sinclair had actually asked for her hand. Judging from the way he answered all her questions, he might very well be the one to fulfill her every need. Still she could not speak. For there was the one need she knew he did not meet.
He did not make her heartbeat quicken. Nor any other part of her, she told herself longingly, as once again an image of Jedidiah, his hands moving over her flesh, assaulted her senses. She was grateful for the darkness that partially hid her ensuing blush from Ian’s view.
Jedidiah McBride was not for her.
But that did not mean she could say yes to Ian, she told herself hurriedly. The voice of reason was just as quick to reply that it might actually be the very reason to do so. There was nothing to be gained by putting off her marriage, by leaving herself open to the temptation of Jedidiah McBride.
In spite of this realization, she was not sure. Thinking to give herself and Ian some time to ponder, she said, “You have been drinking. I take that into consideration when I say I cannot give you a reply. I would not hold you to anything you have said here tonight.”
He opened his mouth to speak, but she halted him. “I am tired now, and must think. I believe I will find my…cousin and ask him if we might go home.”
He seemed to understand her need to contemplate all they had discussed, because he simply nodded. “As you wish.”
Victoria did not look back as she left him, but she felt Ian’s thoughtful gaze upon her.
Chapter Twelve
Victoria breakfasted the next morning alone. She had been informed by Mrs. Dunn that Jedidiah had requested coffee in his room. He’d been pointedly civil to Victoria on the drive home, but had seemed troubled by something he clearly had no wish to discuss. The only thing he had said that could be considered even remotely personal was an offhand comment about having seen her go out to the terrace with Ian Sinclair.
Giving a start, Victoria had looked at him closely, wondering if there was something specific behind the remark. She had known there was not when he failed to even listen as she muttered a hesitant reply.
Though she could not help feeling somewhat bereft at his lack of interest, she was also glad that she was not forced into thinking of something to say. For some reason, she did not want to tell him of Ian’s proposal.
She was just finishing the solitary meal, which she had done no more than pick at, when her maid came to present her with Ian Sinclair’s card. Surprise held her immobile for a long moment.
On reflecting back over the fact that Ian had been slightly drunk and that he was so angry with his father, Victoria had felt he would likely be sorry for the proposal he had made to her. So why then was he here at his hour?
Perhaps, she told herself, he was coming to personally explain his regret and apologize for speaking so hastily. Yes, that must be the reason.
She would soon reassure him about that.
Telling Betty to have refreshments served in the sitting room, Victoria made her way there. Ian stood as soon as she entered the room. And so did Jedidiah McBride, to her immense consternation. He was not smiling.
What, she wondered, was he doing here?
In spite of her shock and anxiety at finding the two men together, she could not help noticing that, though the young nobleman was certainly handsome, he could not compete with the sheer energy and maleness of the sea captain. Jedidiah wore a morning coat of darkest blue over matching trousers, the color contrasting devastatingly with his sun-washed hair. The white collar of his shirt only served to make his tanned throat appear more so, as did the light green of his eyes.
Ian’s buff trousers and dark brown coat, though well cut, rested over shoulders that did not seem quite as large or hug so lovingly to lean hips.
Yet Victoria knew that she did not look on the two men with unbiased eyes. There was no point in denying to herself that Jedidiah’s effect on her was not to be equaled, no matter how attractive another man might be. That included Ian Sinclair, who was famed for his good looks and physique.
‘Victoria restrained a grimace as she dragged her wayward gaze from Jedidiah. The dark-haired man could have come for one reason only, and she did not wish to discuss the proposal, however ridiculous, in front of the American.
Luckily, Lord Sinclair seemed equally reluctant to do so. He greeted her with a restrained expression and an elegant apology. “Lady Victoria, I hope I have not inconvenienced you too much by making such an early appearance.”
“Of course not,” she replied with equal politeness. But her poise diminished as her certainty that Ian was ready to retract his proposal wavered. For the next thing he did was to reach out and take her hand. He held it for the longest moment, gazing down into her eyes with a meaningful communication that, though silent, transferred its intimacy to her.
Without conscious thought, her gaze went to Jedidiah. He was looking at their joined hands with an obvious expression of displeasure.
Hurriedly she pulled her fingers from Lord Sinclair’s.
She took a step backward, infinitely aware of Jedidiah’s attention on her. As if he were completely unaware of the tension exhibited by the other two, Lord Sinclair smiled at her and said, “I have come to see if you will go riding with me this morning. It is a lovely day, and I’m sure you will enjoy yourself.”
Victoria nearly pounced on the suggestion. “What a wonderful idea. I would certainly love to accompany you.” It was a perfect opportunity to discuss the marriage proposal, out from beneath the other man�
��s watchful gaze.
“Yes,” she heard Jedidiah add from behind her. “It is very nice of you to ask. I am sure we’ll enjoy the fresh air.”
Both Ian and Victoria looked to him in surprise. Then, with the good manners that were so much a part of him, Ian responded with alacrity. “Very well, then. What good news.”
She swung around to face Jedidiah. “I’m sure Lord Sinclair does not expect you to disrupt your own plans in order to accompany us.” She eyed Jedidiah with barely restrained hostility, hoping with all her might that he would respond to the hint.
He did not. “I have no other plans this morning,” he countered. His expression remained bland as he stared back at her, his brows arched.
With a last murderous glance toward Jedidiah, which he regarded with feigned innocence, Victoria turned to Ian. “I shall just go up and change.”
Jed rode stiffly, his thighs gripping the saddle with undue force, his fingers clenched around the reins. He knew there was something going on between the lady of Briarwood and the tall, dark nobleman. It had been apparent in the lingering possessiveness with which the man held her hand, and the decided nervousness she displayed from the moment she greeted him.
Jed had, in fact, been battling these feelings that something was wrong since the previous night. He had not been pleased when Victoria disappeared out onto the terrace with the man, and had been even less so when she returned looking so disturbed.
He had done his best to keep from reacting, even when she continued to be so rattled on the carriage ride home. Jed had resolved to keep his attraction to her from intruding between them, and he had done his utmost to live up to that decision, no matter how difficult it had been over the past few days. Yet it had been more than he could do to turn and walk away when he found Sinclair in her house the very next morning.
Feeling the curious gaze of the man in question, he looked up to see that he was riding much too close to Victoria’s mare. Good God, he thought, he must be a sight, hovering over her this way. With a wave of self-derision, he let his horse fall back to trail behind theirs.
What was he thinking? Why had he invited himself along, even though he knew quite well that Victoria was the object of Lord Sinclair’s interest? Jed tried to tell himself he had done so because he did not trust her to be safe in the sole company of the infamous Lord Sin, but the thought did not quite ring true.
Jed was drawn out of his reverie when Ian turned to address him. “What do you say, McBride?”
Shrugging, Jed tried to hide his chagrin at being caught daydreaming. “I’m sorry, I did not hear the question.”
“Did you hear of the Great Exhibition in America? It was held right here in Hyde Park.”
Jed had heard of the amazing showcase for art, science and technology. It was just the kind of thing that appealed to his interests, and he had read the accounts avidly. Today he found he could work up little enthusiasm for the topic. Doing his best to keep that lack of enthusiasm from showing in his voice, Jed nodded. “Certainly.”
He continued to follow behind Ian and Victoria. In spite of his preoccupation with thoughts of Victoria, he found himself listening with interest as Sinclair went on. “The Crystal Palace was made of glass and was 1,848 feet long, 408 feet wide and sixty-six feet high. Prince Albert, who is a great supporter of science and industry, inspired the exhibition, which opened four years ago, in 1851. All nations were invited to participate. It was spectacular.”
Victoria was nodding in agreement. “It was indeed. I was here at the opening with my parents. Queen Victoria seemed very proud of her husband that day.”
Feeling that he should add something to the conversation, Jed said, “I read of the opening in the paper. I believe the building was designed by a Joseph Paxton.”
Victoria nodded. “That is right. He was once a gardener for the duke of Devonshire. The Crystal Palace was taken down soon after the exhibition, and has been reerected at Sydenham.”
Jed’s gaze wandered over the park, trying to picture the event in his mind. The park would have been teeming with visitors, all of whom would have been awed by the grandeur and innovation around them. When he read the story, he’d have laughed out loud if anyone told him he’d someday be riding in the park and mixing with the English aristocracy. His voice was filled with quiet irony. “I never expected to ever come to Hyde Park.”
Ian looked at him. “You hadn’t ever thought of coming to England to see your family?”
Jed couldn’t restrain a frown. “No.” He didn’t want to discuss his reasons for coming to England with Sinclair.
Sinclair clearly would have liked to ask more, but Victoria interrupted, pointing to a cluster of enormous elm trees. “Mr. Paxton altered his original design in order to keep from having the elm trees felled.” The smile she turned on them seemed to Jed to be forced, but Sinclair didn’t appear to notice.
Jed dropped back as they rode off to admire the towering elms. He tried to convince himself their seeming pleasure in each other’s company did not bother him at all.
He looked to where they rode, side by side, ahead of him. To his surprise, he met Victoria’s searching gaze. There was a strange sort of yearning in her eyes that made his own heart ache in response. Dragging his gaze away, Jed told himself he was distorting her emotions to please himself. She could only be angry with him, after the way he had insisted on accompanying them.
He forced himself to concentrate on Sinclair, who was now watching the lady, his expression quite thoughtful. Suddenly he realized that he could very well harm Victoria with his behavior, if the nobleman started to suspect there was something between them. It was this that finally brought Jed completely to his senses.
Jed scowled in self-derision. What a mess he had made of things, and all because he could not control his own feelings for Victoria.
God knew he had tried. But now that he had made love to her, it was all Jed could do to keep himself away from the lady of Briarwood. He could not even bear the thought of another man touching her, eliciting the passionate responses that had so fired his blood and mind.
The passage of days since the night they made love had not lessened his agony. His need to be with her again only appeared to increase with each hour that passed. He could not be near Victoria, speak to her, breathe in her fresh rose scent, without thinking of that night in vivid and agonizing detail.
Glancing up again and seeing Sinclair cast another appraising look his way, Jed drew himself up. He knew that it was his responsibility to rectify any damage he had done.
If Victoria found Sinclair to her liking, who was lie to second-guess her? He had used her as he had feared some other man would, and he had no right to judge.
Pushing his feelings of resentment toward Ian Sinclair to the back of his mind, Jed prodded his horse forward until he was beside the dark-haired man. Calling on all the willpower within him, he smiled. “I feel I should apologize for accompanying you two this morning. I have just met my cousin, and I fear I am overprotective of her, she being my only family.”
Sinclair raised his brows and glanced toward Victoria, then back to Jed. “You mean you are alone in the world, as Victoria is?”
Jed had to work hard to keep from reacting to the other man’s addressing her by her first name, but he managed. “Yes, very much so. That is why I came to England. I was searching for anyone whom I might have a connection to. Imagine my surprise when I learned she was the only one left.” Jed went on softly. “The scarcity of our family has made her all the more precious to me. I want to protect her and be certain she is happy.” Jed could not look at Victoria as he finished, for he was afraid he would give away the effort it cost him to do this. “You understand, I’m sure.”
Ian Sinclair nodded slowly, his gaze raking Victoria. “Perhaps I do.”
Jed had to force down the ire that assaulted him as he watched this. He spoke carefully, concentrating on his need to do what was right for Victoria. “Let’s go back to the beginning.”<
br />
Sinclair smiled, seeming willing to respond to Jed’s overture. “Certainly. I have nothing against you, McBride. It is obvious to me that you and Victoria are close. I am prepared to accept that.”
Jed could feel Victoria’s gaze on him. He dared not even risk a glance at her.
Sinclair held out his hand. Briefly Jed shook it, before the motion of their horses broke the firm grip.
In spite of himself, Jed forced himself to respond to Sinclair’s overtures as he now struck up a polite conversation with him. Sinclair also included Victoria, obviously valuing her contribution to the subject at hand.
Soon Jed found that he was at least able to converse with the man on a civil level. To his further surprise, as the discussion progressed, the topic turned to horses and the breeding of them. Jed soon learned that Sinclair was clearly an expert on the subject. Jed himself knew something of the matter, although he would never have chosen to make his living that way, because it was what his father had done. Horse lore was the only thing his father had ever taught him of value, but Jed had no interest in following the drunkard’s example in any way.
As they talked, much of what his sire had told him came back to him. He and Sinclair soon began to compare the merits of the many equines that were to be seen in the park on a Saturday morning.
Victoria watched the two men with growing vexation. Ian had come to her home with the express notion of taking her riding. For the past hour, he and Jedidiah had chatted and discussed horses as if they were old friends.
Somewhere inside her she knew that she should be glad Jedidiah had decided to be courteous to Ian. Jedidiah’s previous disapproving silence had begun to wear on her equilibrium. Still, she could summon no feelings of happiness or even relief when he made peace with Ian Sinclair.
Victoria knew that if she was the least bit candid with herself, she would have to admit that her present disquiet was not due to her irritation with Jedidiah McBride. It came from another source entirely. As they rode along, she’d realized that if Ian did indeed mean his proposal, she should, for the good of everyone concerned, accept him.
Lady Thorn Page 19
