“Three months ago, today,” he said.
“My birthday,” she said, clearly startled.
She nearly lost her balance. Alex reached a hand out to keep her upright. How had her grandma managed to keep him away from her? Alex was with her on her birthday, they were out in the forest together. She wasn’t in the den at all that day. He must have come when she was away.
“She said that not only were you out for the day, but that she wanted me to go because I’m a disruptive influence, whatever that means. I guess she just never wanted you to become a biker girl like your mother,” he said.
Cynthia gritted her teeth and kicked at the tree stump on which the food rested. She was hurt. How could her grandma have lied to her for all these years? Her pain was replaced with anger, and all the rage was directed squarely at her grandmother.
She wanted to scream into the sky, feel her muscles flare up beneath her skin. Her wolf urged her to shift but she fought it off. Now wasn’t the time.
“I never knew,” she said, finally.
“Don’t hold it against her, Cynthia-”
“I’m still not done being mad at you,” she cut him off. “Being angry at my grandmother doesn’t mean I forgive you.” Alex reached out his arms to hold her for a moment but Cynthia stopped him with the palm of her hand. “Not right now,” she said, shaking. “I’m scared I’ll say or do something that I’ll regret. Just give me a minute.”
She reached into the cooler and pulled out a beer which she snapped open and dumped down her throat.
“Young love!” Crunch shouted, laughing loudly at his idiotic attempt at a joke. Then he scratched at his head as though trying to remember something.
“I almost forgot!” he said. He pointed a massive index finger squarely at Alex. “Scab over there told me about your little stunt in the bar,” he said. “Scab?” Alex wondered.
Crunch again pointed to the silver haired man who almost felt offended at being forgotten already.
“That was some display, I hear. You took on all of Mutt’s goons by yourself?” he chortled. “I even hear you dodged a shotgun at point blank, that’s a hell of a feat.”
Cynthia could feel a solid buzz in her brain from the beer.
“Listen, that bastard Mutt and his gang of idiots have been a pain in my ass for years now. They never came out and started a fight with us, but they give all the bikers on this mountain a bad name,” Crunch said. “Honestly, after losing my own pack I was damn near ready to bust him up myself. I guess you just beat me to it!”
Crunch clapped his hand along Alex’s back.
“You picked the worst night to do it, though,” he continued, “There are some hunters about and they’re looking for fresh prey.”
The breath was knocked from Cynthia and she almost choked on her beer. The last time she heard of hunters was when she was young. Even though wolves are tough and quick, the hunters managed to easily kill eight member of the pack in a single night. The den usually meant safety, but the mere mention of hunters sent shivers down any shifter’s spine.
“How do you know?” Alex wondered.
“You don’t get to be as old as me without making a few friends,” he replied.
“Then I should leave tonight. I don’t want to be the reason they find you. If you know what I did in the bar then no doubt they know too and they’ll be looking for me. I deserve what’s coming,” Alex said nobly.
Crunch scratched at his head. Cynthia sobered up instantly. She knew he was capable of doing some dumb things when the idea got into his head. She readied herself to stop him if he tried to run off but her father beat her to the punch.
“Listen kiddo, what you need to do is just shut up,” Crunch said. “What?” he asked.
“They won’t find you tonight,” he said, “but from what I hear, you need to get your beast in check. It’s not every day that I hear about a primal.”
Crunch sipped at his drink and eyed Alex.
What the hell is a primal?
“Primal?” Cynthia asked without thinking.
“You don’t know what they are? I would’ve figured you’d be the first to know,” Crunch stood to his full height and towered over Alex. “The whole reason Cynthia’s mom decided to stay at that den was because the alpha’s wife was one of them. Quite a looker, too if I recall.”
“Watch what you say, that’s my mother you’re talking about,” Alex said. He didn’t quite understand what Crunch was going on about. What the hell is a primal?
“Settle down, boy. There was no disrespect intended. Quite the opposite in fact. Didn’t know that was your mother, so that must mean you’re in line to be the next alpha?”
Alex shook his head no.
“You gotta be kidding me! Ain’t no way they wouldn’t make you the leader, knowing what you are,” Crunch said with surprise.
“I don’t even know what I am,” Alex replied.
Crunch swirled around his drink, and after realizing there was nothing inside he crumpled the can in his hand and journeyed to the cooler for another beverage.
“When the wolves first came about, they were gigantic, and extremely vicious,” he started, snapping open his beer and taking a hearty sip, “like, five foot high at the shoulder. Jaws so strong they could bite through steel, and muscles so tough they could stop all but the sharpest of weapons.” Crunch started pacing around the fire. “Over time, the wolves started getting smaller and smaller because that strength was no longer needed to protect them from the prying eyes of other predators, mainly man. But, a scant few managed to hold on to the ability to grow to their full potential. Some of the Alphas today are able to grasp at a small amount of that power. I know your dad was like that. He was the only guy big enough to take me down. How do you think he got his limp?”
Crunch chuckled, as did the rest of the bikers.
“My sister Tess said she caused that,” Alex replied with uncertainty.
“In a manner,” he said, “your sister said a few things that I couldn’t ignore and your father took her side. He won, in the end. You don’t see me holding a grudge about it. Either way,” he continued, “You better learn to control your wolf, before it controls you.”
“How?” Alex wondered, “It’s only been a couple days and it feels like its eating me from the inside.”
Crunch polished off the remainder of his beer and threw the can to join his previous one. Another loud belch echoed through the darkness. He tossed a log on the fire and it started crackling.
“I’m not an expert,” he said, “but I have heard of something that will let you communicate with it.”
“Show me,” Alex said urgently, “I need to know. I can’t let it take over like that again.”
“Alright, but this might hurt,” he said.
Cynthia watched on with deep interest. She was both curious and worried. Both emotions reflected on her face.
“What do I have to do,” Alex asked.
Crunch reached to the ground and picked up a small piece of wood and adjusted his waistline as he returned to his feet. He offered the item to Alex who took it, confused.
“What am I supposed to do with this?” he wondered.
“Bite down on it and look to your right,” Crunch said.
He did as he was told. Cynthia watched as her dad cracked his neck and shook out his arms.
“Are you ready?” Crunch asked.
“Yeth,” Alex mumbled through the stick, “bu’ wha’ is thith for?”
“It’s just a distraction,” Crunch said.
“Distraction from what,” Cynthia asked.
“This,” he replied.
In a split second he swung his arm around and clocked Alex across the face. The force of the blow could be felt by Cynthia and she spilled the remainder of her drink to the ground as she leapt to her feet to catch Alex.
“What the hell did you do you bastard!?” she screamed. Alex was completely unconscious in her arms. The stick fell from his mouth and Cynthia slappe
d at his face, hoping he’d wake up.
“This is the fastest way,” Crunch laughed, “You’ll see.”
Alex stirred.
“You better take a step back, Cyn,” Crunch suggested, “this might get a little messy.”
Why would I abandon him?
Alex’s eyes snapped open. Completely black pupils stared into her soul. Alex’s mouth began to take the shape of a muzzle. He growled beneath his breath and for the first time around Alex, Cynthia feared for her safety. She released him and stepped away.
“Explain this shit right now, why did you punch him?” she asked, not taking her eyes off Alex.
Alex pushed himself up to all fours and his body began to change. Thick black fur sprouted from his knuckles and cascaded down the remainder of his exposed skin.
Crunch shoved his way between his daughter and Alex. A move that must have been made to protect her, or so she thought. Alex stared dead eyed at Crunch and growled louder, readying himself to strike. Crunch growled back and stared him down. Their collective will could be felt by everyone else nearby as they both battled for dominance.
Alex’s shift continued to expand and cover his entire body. His biker shirt tore away at the seams, and his jeans loosened and fell to the floor. Cynthia saw that Alex was no longer there. What stood before her was the wolf she knew he’d been holding back. His fur was so dark it was hard to see him against the blackness of the night. Without the firelight he would have been nearly impossible to see.
Crunch didn’t even bother to shift. His experience as a pack alpha served him well and he eventually won out. Alex barked and snarled but then turned and sprinted for the forest stopping only to briefly to glance at Cynthia. She could feel him inside, working hard to regain control.
Come on Alex, Fight it!
After watching him struggle she knew he needed to help, but how could she bring back the Alex she knew?
He disappeared into the woods and Cynthia knew the only way she would find him now would be through his scent. But, should she follow him? He was ready to attack her a moment ago. Something had to be done.
“I hope you’re happy,” She said as she angrily unzipped her leather jacket and let it slide to the ground.
“Give him some time. If he’s as strong as Scab says he is, he’ll be back,” Crunch said.
“What the hell did you do?” she demanded.
Crunch snapped open another beer and plopped himself on the log, again.
“Every shifter alive has one thing in common: we’re all able to keep our instincts in check. Even when we’re asleep we can keep our wolves from getting loose. There’s one exception, when you’re unconscious,” Crunch took a large swig of his drink.
Cynthia pulled off her motorcycle boots one by one and set them beside her jacket.
“The problem is that if you keep it down long enough, it fights to gain control. It’s not hard to keep a normal wolf in check, even when it wants to be let out you can keep the chain around its neck. But, it’s different with primals.”
Cynthia started to draw the leather pants off her legs and the bikers leaned in to get a better look. One of the most beautiful women they’d seen in a while was stripping right in front of them. She became a little nervous with their eyes focused on her.
Crunch threw up a hand and looked back at the pack.
“It’s my daughter you dipshits, show some respect,” he shouted.
They averted their eyes and Cynthia continued to undress albeit with a little more caution.
“So, what you’re saying is that you let the beast out to roam?” she asked with a sudden fear, wondering what dangers he might get himself into.
“In a manner; it’s not enough to just let it out, but he has to make peace with it. Every alpha I’ve known has had to do the same thing when they get to that point,” he added.
“I’m going after him,” she said.
“I wouldn’t advise it,” he replied, “he’s gotta figure this one out for himself.”
Cynthia stood up, only wearing her tube top. Her father turned his attention to the fire.
“Why did you have to hit him? There are other ways, right?” she asked.
“Of course there are,” he laughed, “but I don’t have time to build a sweat lodge. Remember, you said you were leaving in the morning.”
“So he just has to make peace with the beast? That doesn’t seem too hard,” she said.
“Some men don’t,” he added, “and they end up lost forever.”
“Why didn’t you say that sooner!” she shouted, getting a better grasp of the situation. Cynthia stripped off the remainder of her clothing before beckoning to her wolf. It felt like an old friend that she’d always had waiting by her side. The familiar hue of silver and gray sprouted over her body while she fell to all fours. She tried to imagine her wolf overpowering her; she wondered what it was like to be in Alex’s shoes, and the thought frightened her.
“There are hunters about,” Crunch called after her as she began making her way into the forest, “I can’t make your decisions for you, but keep your wits. We’ll be here till sun up tomorrow. Howl for me if you need help and I’ll be there as quick as I can.”
Cynthia barked, signifying her understanding to Crunch before disappearing into the bushes. Her bones still cracked and her muscles burned; a sensation that always felt empowering. Her paws dug into the ashen dirt as she flew through the forest like a silver streak of lightning to hopefully find the man she loved. His scent lingered in the air, she knew it anywhere. She would do whatever was needed to bring him back, even if it meant dragging him kicking and screaming.
“See that! That’s my daughter,” Crunch said with a laugh turning back to his pack, “I know where she got that run.”
Somehow her heart softened. The anger she had held for her father was beginning to melt. Even though he’d possibly done the worst thing imaginable to Alex, she knew he was only trying to help in his own way.
After a minute, the firelight was nothing more than a pin prick of orange seen through the gently swaying forest trees and she was alone.
CHAPTER 16
Run.
Alex wondered what was going on. He felt the wind whipping through his fur, smelled the evergreen trees tingle his nose and heard the branches crunch beneath his feet. He was free.
He’d never felt freedom like this. It was as though a weight he’d carried for so long had been released. His joy quickly ended when he tried to stop but his body wouldn’t react.
Hunt.
What’s going on? His fear quickly escalated as he watched the world unfold around him, unable to make a movement. He was trapped in his body, trapped, not free.
Kill.
He heard them as whispers at first. The urges he’d always known that lived in the back of his mind. But, now they were guiding his actions.
Who are you, he wondered, why are you using my body?
Run, Hunt, Kill.
No, Alex urged, give me back control.
Mine.
This is my body, and I’m taking it back. Alex thought, defiantly.
He reached deep within himself; concentrating on moving his hand. Nothing. He tried concentrating on any part of the body that would obey him and came up empty.
He was a passenger being carried by his body.
What do you want, he asked again out of desperation.
Want to feed. Want to mate.
Alex knew the feeling well. Whenever he was close to Cynthia, his instincts tried to force their way out and take control but he’d always held them back.
Why are you doing this? he asked.
Need to be free.
Was this the part of himself that he was always trying to keep at bay? The part of himself that he’d feared for so long. Was this what made him so blood thirsty in his fights? Somehow he knew it was. That part of him had taken over completely.
You can’t just run around and kill people. What if a hunter catches you? he asked.
/>
Kill hunter.
What about Cynthia? How can you mate if you don’t have a mate? he continued to ask.
Find new one.
Stop! he said, Just stop you stupid bastard of a dog.
Nothing he said mattered. Alex was mortified. All he could do was wonder where his wolf was taking him, what its intentions were, knowing first hand that it was dangerous.
So this is what it feels like, he thought. This is how it feels to lose control. Alex gave up, he was defeated. If he had no control what could he do? He could imagine himself drifting, lost forever on auto pilot.
The beast slowed to a walking pace. It panted heavy breaths in the cold evening air. Above him the moon poked through a small clearing in the trees.
Freedom.
Alex could feel what the wolf had meant. Freedom indeed. The satisfaction was a sensation that flowed between them. For once, Alex and his wolf agreed.
It feels nice, doesn’t it? he asked.
Yes.
I was going to run away from home so that I could make my own path; one without my commanding father or the frustration of dealing with a pack.
The beast laid itself on the ground. He could hear the birds of the evening prowling for the hunt, and the rodents that skittered along the dirt nearby. The breeze whistled at his ears and tugged at his fur as he sat in silence.
He rarely felt this free and almost never felt this alive. The calling of his instincts had always been a burden and one that he didn’t indulge. Deep down he could remember that he was always scared of the creature he saw in his dreams and feared that one day it might take over.
Afraid, he would try distracting himself, always doing things that scared him, to prove to himself he wasn’t a coward. Most of the time proving his courage got him in trouble with his father, the rest of the time he’d been too injured to care.
But, now with the beast firmly in control of him, he wondered if he had been right to suppress it. It felt like he’d spent his entire life cutting away a part of himself.
You’re part of me, he said.
Yes.
But, he thought, I’m also a part of you.
Yes.
One man, one wolf, bound together forever.
The Snow Leopard's Christmas Surprise Page 122
