Suddenly, as if just thinking about him had conjured him up, she felt Luke’s presence. He settled himself onto the bench beside her, as he had so often in the past, slouched down, legs sticking straight out, arms stretched across the back of the bench, fingertips just barely brushing her bare shoulder. Her entire body heated from that innocent, casual touch. Katie longed to fling herself into his arms seeking the safe haven she had once found there. Instead, sitting stiffly, she waited for him to explain why he’d come.
He regarded her worriedly. “What’s up, Katie? You look as if you’ve just lost your best friend.”
She glanced over at him. He was dressed once again in the familiar, casual attire he’d always worn. She still couldn’t reconcile this Luke with the man whose picture had appeared on so many financial pages, all decked out in perfectly tailored designer suits. This look made him seem familiar, accessible. She could almost believe he was still her best friend and that nothing had ever gone awry between them.
“How’d you find me?” she asked.
“Peg said you’d taken off. You weren’t at the boarding house. After that it was easy. I spent a lot of years tracking you down every time you were hurting. You always aimed straight here, even when you were too young to drive and had to walk all the way.” His gaze searched her face. “So what’s the deal? Are you hurting now? And why was Peg in such a snit? She practically bit my head off.”
“I’m feeling guilty.”
“About?”
“The way Peg found out about our plans. That also explains her mood.”
He regarded her with obvious puzzlement. “I thought you had told her. Isn’t that how word got out today?”
She gave him a rueful look. “No, I didn’t tell her. You did.”
“Me? But I didn’t say a word, not until...” He studied her expression, then groaned. “Hell, Katie, hadn’t you told her before I showed up this afternoon? Half the town was talking about it by then. I just assumed...”
“Believe me, I know. I suppose it’s better that the news came from you, rather than some well-meaning busybody,” she said wearily. “Luke, she’s so hurt. She hasn’t said a single word to me.”
His expression turned incredulous. “You mean you didn’t sit down and talk about it after I left?”
“Not a word. She went into the kitchen and stayed there.”
“No wonder she looked at me the way she did. Why didn’t you go after her?”
“The diner was too busy,” she said defensively.
Luke regarded her with blatant skepticism. In the face of his doubtful expression, Katie hesitated, then finally admitted the truth. “I’m afraid she’ll guess. I’m afraid she’ll take one look at my face and know that this whole thing is some sort of sick joke.”
Luke stared at her for what seemed an eternity. “Is that how you see what we’re doing?” he asked, his voice flat.
“Well, isn’t it? Usually two people get married because they’re madly in love, not because one wants a baby-sitter and the other one needs financial backing.”
Apparently the bitterness she was feeling came through in her tone, because Luke asked quietly, “Do you want out of our deal, Katie? Is that what this is all about?”
“Yes,” she said without thinking, then sighed. “No.”
“Which is it?”
I want you to love me, she thought, but she didn’t say the words aloud. There was no point in voicing the impossible. It would just make an already awkward situation untenable.
“We made a bargain. I intend to keep it,” she said firmly, trying to blink back the tears that threatened.
For a minute Luke looked as if he might argue with her, but then his expression shut down. He reached over and gently brushed away the single tear that tracked down her cheek. “We’ll make it work, Katie. I swear to you that somehow we’ll make it work.”
His solemn promise only served to make even more tears well up. Katie hurriedly swiped them away before they became a deluge.
When she could bear to meet his gaze, she looked up at Luke. “Thanks for coming to look for me. I needed a pep talk.”
He gave her one of his patented, reassuring smiles. “In just a few more days, I’ll be around whenever you need me. Don’t forget that.”
“I’m counting on it.” She gave him a wobbly, damp smile. “By the way, why did you come if you didn’t know about Peg and me?”
“Maybe I just wanted to see you,” he said lightly.
Katie didn’t believe that for a minute. “Is there a problem?”
“No, there is not a problem,” he said with a touch of impatience. “I just had some time. I thought maybe we could go for a drive or something.”
It was the first time she could think of that Luke had so much as hinted at a desire to spend time alone with her. Katie was certain there had to be more to it. “You and me and Robby?”
“No, Katie. You and me. Period.” He shook his head. “I guess it was a bad idea.”
Something in his expression told her she really had spoiled what had been meant as a gesture to bring them closer together before the wedding. “We could still go.”
“You need to talk to Peg. At the moment that’s more important. I know how much her opinion matters to you.”
“She raised me, Luke. She’s all the family I have.” Suddenly something occurred to her. “Speaking of family, you haven’t said a word about Tommy. Will your brother be here for the wedding?”
“No,” he snapped without hesitation.
The curt response startled her. “Luke?”
“Leave it alone.”
Something in his expression told her to do exactly as he asked. She knew Luke had been deeply hurt when Tommy had run off years ago, but surely after all this time he had forgiven him. He had adored his younger brother. No matter how many scrapes Tommy had gotten in, Luke had always bailed him out. In some ways, she suspected, Luke had even envied Tommy his rebellious ways.
Maybe she could find Tommy and lure him to the wedding, she thought briefly before assessing Luke’s forbidding expression again. Then again, maybe she’d better stay away from that troubled relationship until she understood it. Besides, she had her own family emergency to resolve.
“I guess I’d better go find Peg and face the music,” she said reluctantly.
“It’ll be all right. She loves you. She just wants you to be happy.”
Katie didn’t have the heart to tell him that that was the problem. Peg wouldn’t believe in a million years that Luke Cassidy could make her happy, not after he’d done such a bang-up job of breaking her heart.
* * *
At four-thirty in the afternoon the diner was usually empty. The lunch crowd was long gone. The school kids had finished their soft drinks, milk shakes and ice cream cones and headed home. And the dinner crowd, always light during the week, anyway, wouldn’t show up for a good hour or more.
Peg usually used the time to check the day’s receipts, make lists of supplies to be ordered or simply to put her feet up for a few minutes and catch a quick, refreshing nap before the chaos started all over again.
Today, however, Katie found her aunt pacing from the front door to the kitchen and back again, clearly distracted and upset. Watching her through the window, Katie sighed as she tried to gather the courage to go in. Finally, fearing she was about to be spotted anyway, she opened the door.
When the bell over the door rang, Peg glanced through the pass-through window from the kitchen and saw her. The worry lines in her forehead deepened as she came through the swinging door. Normally an energetic whirlwind, today her aunt looked her age. Her steps had slowed. Her usually tidy, short, gray hair was virtually standing on end from the number of times she’d dragged her fingers through it.
“There you are,” she said quietly. “Where’d you go? To the beach?”
Katie grinned sheepishly. No one, with the possible exception of Luke, knew her better than this woman who had taken her in and loved her f
or so many years. “Where else?” she said.
“Feeling lousy?”
There was an accusation behind the question that Katie couldn’t mistake. She deserved to feel lousy and they both knew it. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”
“Are you?”
“You know I am. I would never intentionally do anything to upset you.”
“I always thought that was true,” Peg said, as if she were no longer quite so certain. With her expression far more nonchalant than the situation called for, she inquired, “So, when’s the wedding?”
Katie knew a loaded question when she heard one. If she could say six months from now or even a month from now, Peg might believe that the leaked news truly was fresh and that she hadn’t intentionally been shut out. When she heard the truth, she was going to be hurt all over again.
“Saturday,” Katie said, watching the pain gather in Peg’s eyes. “Justice of the Peace Abernathy is going to perform the ceremony at eleven o’clock.”
Peg simply stared at her, shock written all over her face. “A justice of the peace? This Saturday? When exactly had you planned to get around to letting me know? After the honeymoon?”
As soon as the angry words were out, Peg Jones moved like a whirlwind. With brisk efficiency, she slapped a Closed sign on the door, poured two cups of coffee, plunked them on the counter and ordered Katie to sit.
“Okay. What’s this all about?” the fifty-year-old woman demanded, her gaze pinned on Katie.
Katie winced under that penetrating look. She tried valiantly to put a positive spin on things. “Luke asked me to marry him. I said yes. It’s as simple as that.”
“Nothing’s ever been simple between the two of you,” Peg countered. “Katie, the man broke your heart. I’ve watched you mope around for the past six years, refusing to look at anyone else, shutting yourself off from life. Now he waltzes back into town, says let’s get married and bingo, everything’s just dandy again? I don’t believe it. Has he even explained why he left? Has he apologized?”
“He doesn’t owe me an apology.”
Peg sniffed indignantly, but made no comment.
“Luke and I were...are best friends. I can’t think of a better basis for marriage,” Katie said defensively. “No two people could possibly know each other any better than Luke and I do. We’re well suited. We know exactly what we’re getting into.”
She ignored the coffee her aunt had poured, stood and began cleaning the counter, which had already been polished to a shine. She didn’t care. She needed to stay on her feet. She needed to be able to avoid her aunt’s probing looks and pointed questions.
No matter how much her evasions hurt her aunt, Katie refused to admit out loud that Luke wasn’t marrying her for love. She refused to admit that they had simply made a deal. That was no one’s business, not even her beloved aunt’s. Peg, who’d raised Katie to abide by an old-fashioned set of values and a romantic’s notions of what marriage was supposed to be, would be appalled if she discovered the truth. Her own marriage to Katie’s father’s brother had been cut short by a tragic accident, but Peg’s memories of that time had always brought a sparkle to her eyes.
“Hogwash,” Peg said in response to Katie’s claim. “Friendship has its places, but what about love, Katie? I’ve always dreamed of watching you walk down the aisle with a radiant look on your face. Friendship doesn’t make you radiant. That takes fire and passion.”
Katie thought back to the one night she’d spent in Luke’s arms. There had been fire and passion enough that night. Loving him had been everything she’d ever imagined it could be. It had been...she searched for a word adequate to describe it. Magical, she decided finally. The stuff of storybooks and romantic movies, certainly an equal to whatever Peg had shared with Harry Jones.
Losing Luke had been worse than anything Katie had ever dreamed of, especially without knowing why he had gone. That she’d been abandoned not just by a lover, but by a best friend had tormented her for the past six years. The loss had made her question her memories of that night, made her doubt herself in ways that she could never share, not with anyone.
Then, when she had seen Luke sitting in the back of the church at Lucy Maguire’s aborted wedding ceremony, holding a handsome boy with the classic Cassidy features and Luke’s unmistakable blue eyes, she had guessed at once why Luke had left Clover. He had gone away to marry the mother of that darling child. The only thing left to figure out had been where the boy’s mother was now.
Naturally everyone in town had asked about Robby’s mother, about the secret bride that no one—not even his very best friend—had known that Luke had taken.
And Katie had heard back from most of them, in the form of idle gossip at Peg’s, gossip that usually turned silent the instant anyone noticed Katie’s presence. No one had learned a blasted thing. Luke had remained discreetly tight-lipped on that score, except to say that he and the boy’s mother were divorced. End of story.
Katie sighed. She doubted he would say anything more to her even if she tried to force the issue. That had always been Luke’s way. He’d kept his emotions bottled up inside. He’d watched his mother get old and tired very quickly after his father split. He’d been more father than big brother to that hellion of a brother of his, and Tommy had paid him back by taking off just like their father. Katie had been the only one in town who’d detected the anguish that Tommy’s leaving had caused Luke. Everyone else had said good riddance, but Luke had viewed Tommy’s departure as his own failure. He had blamed himself for not being a good enough surrogate father, even though only a few years had separated him in age from Tommy.
She thought about that now and realized that despite his unexplained departure from her life, in her heart she had never doubted Luke’s decency. It was at the core of who he was, a decent, responsible man, determined to be more honest and honorable than the father who’d abandoned him. She didn’t believe for an instant that those two traits had vanished. He might not be in love with her. He might not have made the most romantic proposal on record. But he would do his very best to make her a good husband. He would honor this commitment he was making. And he’d come to her, chosen her because he wanted to do what was best for his son. That wasn’t the act of a man who’d suddenly turned selfish.
Somehow she had to convince her aunt of that or Peg would be worrying herself sick.
She took her aunt’s hand. “Please, Peg, I know it’s unexpected—”
“A pure bolt out of the blue is more like it. He’s only been back in town off and on for a couple of months now.”
“Since March,” Katie corrected.
“Whatever. I didn’t even think the two of you were speaking.”
“Well, obviously we are. This is what I want. What Luke and I want.” She leaned across the counter to hug her aunt. “Please, I really need your support and your love. I need you to give us your blessing. You’ll be there on Saturday, won’t you? I can’t possibly have a wedding without you.”
“If I thought that were true, I’d stay away just to prevent you from making a terrible mistake,” her aunt said.
“You can’t protect me forever. I’m a grown woman. If this is a mistake, it’s mine to make. I love him with all my heart, Peg. You know that. I always have. I have to try. I don’t want to live with even more regrets.”
“Regrets aren’t always the worst things to have,” her aunt argued. “But...” She cut off whatever she’d been about to say and sighed. “Never mind. I love you. If you can look me in the eye and tell me you think Luke will make you happy, then of course I’ll be there.”
Katie thought at first that her aunt’s words were the concession she’d been seeking. One look into Peg’s eyes told her otherwise. Her aunt meant them as a challenge.
“Well,” Peg prodded.
Katie forced herself to meet her aunt’s skeptical gaze. “I wouldn’t be marrying him if I didn’t believe that with all my heart,” she said staunchly.
The firmly spoken w
ords clearly didn’t banish all of Peg’s doubts, but she nodded, her expression resigned.
“Okay, then. Let’s make some plans. I’ll throw the reception for you afterward. Nothing fancy,” she added quickly in response to Katie’s frown. “Just a few folks over for a nice brunch at the house. Maybe a champagne toast.”
“But...”
Peg waved off any objections. “I don’t care how small the ceremony is or how rushed, every couple should start life with a few good wishes from their family and friends.”
Katie figured her wedding day was going to be difficult enough without having to pretend in front of a bunch of people that it truly was the happiest day of her life. “I’ll have to ask Luke,” she hedged. “We really wanted to keep this simple and private.”
“Can I give you one last piece of advice before I turn you over to that man?” Peg asked. She didn’t pause long enough for a reply, which Katie didn’t have ready, anyway. “You don’t ask him for his opinion on every little thing, Katie. You tell him what you want once in a while.”
Good advice, Katie thought, as she gave a last swipe at the diner’s counter before racing home to do the Monday laundry for the boarding house. But how was she supposed to tell Luke Cassidy that the only thing she really wanted from him was his love?
CHAPTER TWO
On the night before her wedding, when most brides would be celebrating with a rehearsal dinner or a shower, Katie gathered the residents of the Clover Street Boarding House in the living room. She’d learned that afternoon that they were all terrified about what her marriage would mean to the future of the boarding house. Seventeen-year-old Ginger, who’d chewed her nails down to the quick again for the first time in months, had revealed the concerns of the half-dozen boarders.
“Katie, you haven’t said. How soon will you be wanting us to leave?” Ginger had asked, her voice trembling with emotion. She’d been drying the same soup bowl for the past ten minutes, obviously trying to work up the courage to get into this with Katie.
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