He hated that she’d gone back to calling him ‘Vampire’. And hated that he could feel her closing up, pulling the walls back up around her. For so long, she’d been utterly alone, isolated by her inability to trust anyone with the truth of who…and what…she really was. Even Zack hadn’t known she was a sorceress until she’d been forced to reveal her abilities in order to save his life.
But slowly, Arturo had worked his way past her barriers. Slowly, she’d come to trust him. Or, at least, he’d thought she had. The swiftness in which she’d lost faith in him told him he’d made far less progress with her than he’d hoped. And the knowledge was a fist in his stomach.
“I cannot banish the memories of my betrayals,” he said. “They are nightmares that replay over and over in my head. I have given you much reason to doubt me since we met, amore mio, but none since my soul reawakened. I do not wish to keep any more secrets from you, but this one…” He shook his head, his brow furrowing. “Cristoff cannot know.”
“Is it a bigger secret than you being his traitor?”
His lips compressed and he nodded. “You know that I asked you not to accompany me to Gonzaga. I asked you to let me find a way to steal Escalla alone, but you have insisted on going.”
“Because you can’t do it without my magic!” she said heatedly. “We all know that.”
“I do know that.” He’d finally accepted that yesterday. Now he used her doubts against her.
He felt the burst of frustration within her. And, unfortunately, no lessening of her wariness. She watched him with eyes at once fierce and haunted. She wanted to believe in him. He could feel that longing within her, but it was being devoured by the gnawing fear that she was being deceived yet again. And her fear slew him.
“Tesoro.”
Quinn shook her head and turned for the doorway. “I need to think.”
Arturo watched her leave, frustrated and unhappy. The last thing he wanted was for her to once more retreat behind the walls that had, for so long, isolated her. He wished for her to feel connected to those who would be her friends. He wanted her to be happy. And safe.
He simply wanted her. In so many ways—her smile, her sunshine, her trust.
Her heart.
Perhaps it was better this way, better for her to doubt him, better for her to refuse to accompany him to Gonzaga Castle, for he deeply doubted his ability to keep her safe there.
But without her magic, they would almost certainly fail to retrieve Escalla.
And unless they destroyed Escalla, Quinn would never be able to save his world.
Mio Dio, it was an impossible choice—his world and his friends, or the woman who had slowly, utterly, stolen his heart.
Quinn strode through the hallway beneath Neo’s, uncertain where she was going. She needed to think, to find the trust within herself that it would take to accompany Arturo once more into Cristoff Gonzaga’s house of horrors. The thought of going back there had her stomach twisting, her skin flushing damp with perspiration.
Less than an hour ago, she’d been certain Arturo would never betray her again. But, from the beginning, his betrayals had taken her by surprise. They shouldn’t have—he was a vampire, after all—but despite that, she’d seen honor in him. Unfortunately, back then, his honor had manifested mostly as unwavering loyalty to his vampire master. And while Arturo had never actually hurt her himself, not physically, he’d told her he would never protect her against his master. And he hadn’t.
Since his soul had fully returned, he’d assured her, over and over, that he would protect her, that he’d never allow Cristoff to hurt her again. But this was the first opportunity she’d had to test it. And she was no longer certain he wouldn’t fail.
As she turned the corner to the hallway where her own tiny room was located, she nearly ran into Dr. Morris, a petite brunette with long, wavy hair that glowed with the phosphorescence that marked her as an immortal human, or Slava.
“Amanda.”
“Quinn.” The doctor frowned, concern in her eyes. “What’s happened?”
Quinn tried to remember if she’d seen her upstairs. “Carlos…”
“I know.” Sadness pulled at the doctor’s pretty features even as she continued to study Quinn. Dr. Amanda Morris was far too perceptive. “Are you okay? Is it Zack?”
Quinn hesitated. Amanda was another women who’d made friendly overtures toward her. Friendship had never come easily to Quinn, but damn if she didn’t need someone to talk to now.
“Do you have a minute?”
“Of course.” Amanda nodded toward the opposite hallway with her head. “My examining room is larger than the bedrooms. And private.”
Quinn followed, her stomach a mass of knots. An hour. The vampires wanted to leave in an hour. Fifteen minutes ago, it had been her pushing to go and Arturo holding back. Now they’d switched places and she felt utterly conflicted.
Amanda led the way into a sterile, modern-looking doctor’s examination room, and lit one of the lamps. She motioned to the chair in the corner, then took a seat on her stool as Quinn sat down.
“What’s going on, Quinn?” Amanda had been a family practitioner in the real world until five years ago when she was captured, enslaved, then rescued and brought to Neo’s. Before Neo and Mukdalla could ferry her back to the real world, Amanda met Sam, one of the Slavas helping Neo, a human who could never leave Vamp City. Now the two were married, both trapped here, both working to help the escaped humans, each in his or her own way. Both would die when the magic failed.
If it failed. If Quinn couldn’t free her magic. If she couldn’t trust…
“How much faith do you have in Arturo Mazza?” Quinn hadn’t intended to be so blunt, but the question burst from her, unwilling to be contained.
Amanda’s expression turned wry. “What’s he done this time?”
Quinn’s mouth compressed. “I overheard him talking to Micah, assuring Micah that he would be able to do whatever he had to, something Micah had doubts about. When I confronted them, neither would meet my eye.”
Amanda frowned. “You believe this is something significant?”
Raking tense fingers through her hair, Quinn relayed the missing, damning piece. “We’re supposed to leave for Gonzaga Castle in an hour.”
The doctor’s eyes widened, then melted with understanding and sympathy. “Oh, Quinn.”
“Yeah. Do you have any idea what kind of trust it requires for me to go back there with him? I had that trust. Until I caught the two of them whispering, I had it.” Quinn stood and paced the room, wishing there was a window to look out. “I just keep wondering if I’m being a colossal fool. If he’s been playing me all along.”
Amanda took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I can’t give you a definitive answer, Quinn. He’s a vampire whose soul was compromised, though never completely. Even at his worst, he brought escaped slaves to us and helped Neo hide our operation. He never entirely lost himself. But there’s no denying that for a long time he couldn’t see what Cristoff had become. While he might not have lost his own soul, he couldn’t see how completely his master had lost his. He sees the truth, now, I think. Neo and Kassius were talking about this just last night, how different Arturo is. How much you’ve changed him.”
Quinn watched her. “But what if it’s all a lie? What if I haven’t changed him enough? His loyalty to Cristoff was absolute.”
“Was. It’s not anymore, Quinn, you know that. Arturo made his choice between you and his master the day he found you in Cristoff’s dungeon. He chose you. He risked everything to get you out of there.” Amanda shrugged. “I can’t promise you anything, of course. But I see a look in his eyes when he watches you, a look that tells me he’d sooner rip out his own heart than let Cristoff touch you again.”
With a heavy sigh, Quinn nodded. “Somewhere inside, I believe that. But on some level, I’ve always believed that, even when it wasn’t justified. I can’t be that foolish again.” She shook her head. “I can’t.”
“I know.” Amanda smiled, a quiet smile that almost reached her eyes. “Sometimes all we can do is go with our gut. In the meantime…”
A fist pounded on the door, making both women jump.
“Amanda!”
Amanda jumped up and opened the door.
Rinaldo stood in the doorway. “You’re needed upstairs. Quickly! It’s Zack.”
Chapter 6
Zack.
As Quinn ran for the door of Amanda’s examining room, both Rinaldo and Amanda disappeared in a vampire flash. Since Amanda was no vampire, Rinaldo must have picked her up and carried her, which meant she was badly needed. For Zack.
Quinn’s heart seized, her vision blurring with moisture, as she tore out of the room. She was halfway down the hall when Micah appeared suddenly, swept her into his arms, and then she, too, was flying up the stairs, vampire-fast.
Moments later, Micah deposited her in the middle of the kitchen where she turned to find Arturo on his knees, leaning over Zack’s prone body, his fangs buried deep in her brother’s neck.
“What happened?” Quinn and Amanda demanded simultaneously as the doctor knelt on Zack’s other side, Quinn at his feet.
“We don’t know,” Mukdalla told them. “He was standing there asking if there was any leftover ham when his eyes suddenly rolled up in his head and he started to go down. Arturo caught him before he hit the floor and ordered us to fetch you two.”
Arturo pulled back, his fangs retracting as he met her gaze with sorrowful eyes, then turned to Amanda. “I’ve initiated healing with my bite, but…” He shook his head. Quinn’s heart began to race, fear a live wire in her chest. “What’s the matter?”
“His blood tastes off, cara mia,” he said, meeting her gaze with compassion. “Almost rancid.”
She stared at him, wanting to deny his words, wanting to rail at the universe. “He’s out of time.” The words felt ripped from her throat and she grasped Zack’s blazing hot bare feet as if she could somehow keep him tethered to life.
Suddenly his right foot twitched, then jerked out of her hold as her brother pushed himself up to a sitting position.
“Shit,” he muttered as if he’d been caught asleep on the kitchen floor. He stood, scattering those gathered around him.
Quinn pushed to her feet. “Zack?”
Her brother shook his head, but refused to meet her gaze as he turned and strode out of the kitchen. “I’m fine,” he tossed over his shoulder.
But he wasn’t fine. Not even close.
Dammit, dammit, dammit.
Shaking, she turned to Arturo. “We leave in an hour.” She didn’t know how she was going to steal Escalla, and wasn’t entirely certain Arturo wouldn’t betray her, but none of that signified when Zack was dying. There was only one possible way to save him and she knew what she had to do.
The look in Arturo’s eyes—frustration, resignation—told her he knew exactly what she was thinking. And that he was remembering their argument of yesterday shortly after she’d tried and tried to renew Vamp City’s magic, even when it was clear the attempts were killing her.
“You put him first,” Arturo said. “Always you put him first. Look me in the eye and tell me you would have stopped trying to renew the magic when the pain became too much. That you would have given up at some point even if I hadn’t been there to try to stop you.”
She wouldn’t have. Of course not. She’d believed that renewing the magic was the only way to save Zack.
“You’d have committed suicide before you quit.”
“He’s my brother!”
“He is more than that, tesoro,” Arturo said quietly. “He is your only reason for living.”
The words were a slap. The pain fueled her anger. “I don’t have to listen to this.”
But when she reached for the door of her small bedroom, he spun her around, furious eyes staring into her own. “Zack is all you care about. Your focus is so damn narrow, Quinn, that if it does not involve Zack, it does not matter. Kassius, Amanda, Neo, Rinaldo—all have befriended you, and when the magic fails, they will die, as will dozens of others, hundreds, many of whom do not deserve to. Yet you give them no thought.”
“What about the human captives who will be saved if Vamp City dies? You give them no thought!”
“There you are wrong, cara mia. I do give them thought. When you renew the magic, most of the vampires will reclaim their consciences and their souls. The barbarity will end. Some vampires will continue to feed and abuse humans—it has been so since the dawn of time. But the majority will not.”
He gripped her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. “You rail at me for lying to you, yet you lie to yourself. Your concern is not for the captives, Quinn. To some extent, yes. You are not without heart. But your primary concern is and has always been Zack, even at the cost of your own life. Have you ever stopped to ask yourself why?”
“He’s my brother.” She glared at him, the ache in her chest spreading.
“Have you considered what it would do to him if you died trying to save him? You protect yourself, Quinn, above all others, above anything and everything else. And everyone else be damned. Even Zack.”
“Go to Hell.” She jerked free of his hold, refusing to listen to this anymore. He was full of bullshit. “You’re wrong. I’m protecting him. It’s the one thing I can do, the one thing I can give him.”
“Can you not simply love him?”
Zack had so many who loved him. She’d never been his whole world, but he was, and had always been, hers.
A gentle hand caressed her hair. “You protect yourself, Quinn. Understandably so. You have known too much betrayal in your life—the mother who abandoned you by dying, the father who brought a woman into your life who could not love you, then sided with that shrew against you. The friends who abandoned you at the first sign of your differentness. It is surprising, tesoro, that you are as capable of love as you are, and you are capable of great love. It shines within you every time you look at your brother.”
Quinn squeezed her eyes closed, trying to shut out his words and failing.
“You are not alone anymore, Quinn. Within this safe house are many who have not shunned you despite your power. Who, in fact, care about you very much.” His hand stroked her hair. “You are my weakness, amore mio. You may not put your own safety first, but I must. I cannot help my need to protect you any more than you can help your own to protect your brother.”
As she watched Arturo now, she knew what he was thinking, knew that he saw in her quick turnabout just more willingness to sacrifice anything and everything for Zack. But how could she not? From the moment her dad and stepmother brought him home from the hospital, he’d been the only one in the world whose love she’d never doubted, the only one she’d always been able to count on. How many times had she been banished to her room as a child? Yet Zack had always come to check on her, and often to join her, even if it was only to lie on his stomach on the rug beside her bed and play his GameBoy while she did her homework.
“We leave in an hour,” she repeated.
“Then let’s meet in the sitting room in half an hour so I can do our glamour,” Micah said.
Arturo’s mouth compressed as he met Quinn’s gaze. Without a word, he turned and walked away.
A half an hour later, Quinn entered the sitting room beneath Neo’s, a room as Spartan as the bedrooms, if a bit larger. Two dark gray sofas sat at right angles to one another, an oil lamp glowing from the end table between them.
Arturo sat on one of the sofas while Micah stood facing a male she didn’t know. A Gonzaga guard. Even as her heart skipped a beat, Micah turned to smile at her.
“Kass is done,” he said casually.
It took her brain a moment to catch up. Kass is done. Kassius. Her gaze snapped to the unknown guard. In his eyes, she recognized her friend. The eyes were the one part of the body that could not be hidden behind glamour.
“Kassius,” she breathed and the stranger smi
led at her. Micah’s gift was extraordinary.
“Ready?” Micah motioned her over.
Taking a deep breath to gather her scattered wits, Quinn shook her head. “Do Arturo first.” It was Cristoff Gonzaga’s guards who were scouring the city for her, under orders to capture her and bring her in. Believing one had breached Neo’s sanctuary had unsettled her more than she cared to admit, more than she already was thanks to the furtive conversation she’d overheard earlier, one that continued to play havoc with her imagination in the worst possible way. And at the worst possible time.
For a moment, as she’d stared at the guard, she’d thought he’d already betrayed her.
Arturo watched her now with deep, fathomless eyes and she wondered if he’d felt that stab of fear, that moment’s belief in his duplicity. If she didn’t find a way to put aside her doubts, if she couldn’t trust him, their mission was doomed.
Micah moved toward Arturo. “It looks like your up, Ax.”
As Arturo rose from the sofa, he watched her, his expression shuttered in a way that made her think he didn’t want her to know just how much her lack of faith in him cut.
The truth was, despite the doubts preying on her mind, she did, for the most part, trust him. They’d been through so much together over the past days and weeks—had risked their lives for one another over and over again. He cared about her, she knew he did. Just as she cared about him.
But trust had never come easily to her. It had always been a fragile thing, made even more so with the stakes so terrifyingly high.
Micah lifted his hands to Arturo’s face and Arturo closed his eyes.
“Will Lukas have difficulty without your help tonight?” Arturo asked Micah.
“He won’t be able to get the kids out of the city until I get there—I’m the only one he has working with him who can still move between the worlds—but he’ll continue to round up all the kids he can find. I don’t think there are too many of them left. With any luck, I’ll be able to meet him at the rendezvous point before sunrise.”
Of Blood and Passion Page 4
