Watching her, he stood by the side of the bed, stripping out of the rest of his clothes, then tearing open the condom he’d gone to the bathroom to get. He sheathed himself as she watched, her gaze locked on the hard length of him. He was as big there as he was everywhere else, and the anticipation inside her thrummed into overdrive.
“Been waiting days for this,” he muttered, coming down on top of her as she parted her legs to draw him in. “Feels like years.”
“It does,” she agreed breathlessly. Oh, the heavy, solid feel of him covering her body was so right. So tantalizing. And then he slid inside her in one glorious thrust.
Cass gasped and moved with him as he took her over completely. He filled her to the point where she thought she would never feel empty again, with or without him in her life. She knew his imprint would remain long after this night was over—that thought squeezed her heart painfully, so she dismissed it and focused on what he was doing to her now. There would be time enough later for regrets, for pain.
He moved in her, his body sliding in and out in a frenzied dance of need and passion. Her hands moved up and down his back, along his thighs, felt the power in his leanly muscled body and gloried in it. She lifted her legs to wrap them around his hips, pulling him in higher, deeper, and still it wasn’t enough. It might never be enough.
Tension coiled inside her, tightening with his every thrust until she was gasping, lungs heaving for air that couldn’t get past the knot lodged in her throat. And still she pushed him forward.
His whispered words, his kisses, all drove her toward the peak. She moved with him, around him, their flesh fused together by heat and passion. Cass groaned, called his name and reached for that dazzling light hanging in front of her. She had to have it. Had never known such bone-deep need, such desperation...
“Take it, Cassie. Take me,” he whispered. “Let it go and grab for it.”
“With you,” she insisted, shaking her head against the duvet that now felt like a silky pool of fire beneath her. Shadows twisted, firelight danced in his eyes as she stared into their depths and gasped, “We go together.”
He smiled, buried his face in the crook of her neck, and nibbled at her throat as he reached down between their bodies to flick his thumb across the hard swollen bud at her core. When she splintered in his arms, she heard him murmur, “You first.”
Power slammed into her, shuddering through her body as she clung to him, soaring higher than she’d ever been before as he continued to move inside her, pushing her ever higher. The last of her climax was still rippling through her when she heard him groan her name. As his body rocked with completion, she held on to him, wondering how she was ever going to let him go.
What she’d just experienced would never happen with a different man. She knew it. It was Jake who had gotten past every one of her hesitations, her worries, and made her forget her reluctance to get involved with the one man she shouldn’t.
And now she knew why she’d instinctively tried to hold herself back from him. It had nothing to do with worry over her boss or even the fact that she would be leaving and going back to Boston. No, this was more elemental than that. Somewhere, she had known that this man was the one who could reach her heart.
Jake Hunter was the one man in the world who could make her want to let go of old doubts and mistrusts.
To risk falling in love.
Jake rolled to one side and as he lay there beside her, Cass could practically feel him pulling away. She knew that right then, he was trying to find a way to let her down easy. To tell her that this didn’t mean anything. That it had been a mistake and wouldn’t be repeated.
But it would be repeated if she had anything to say about it. For the time she was in Montana, she wanted him with her, in her, over her. She wanted to wrap herself around him and luxuriate in the feeling of his skin along hers.
Because she knew, when she left, it would be over.
Oh, she hadn’t counted on this. Hadn’t expected to find...him. Now that she had, though, she also had to accept that she was going to lose him. Her heart pinged with an ache she realized would be with her for the rest of her life. But she hadn’t asked for forever and he hadn’t offered. Judging by the expression on his face and the shutters across his eyes, that offer wasn’t about to be made, either.
So Cass would keep this light and never let him know that she was already more than halfway in love with him.
Turning her head to look at the man beside her, she noted his forearm tossed across his eyes, his chest moving with long, deep breaths and the wall he was already erecting between them.
As she watched him, he went up on one elbow and turned to look at her. She could read on his expression that he was about to start the whole this-was-a-mistake-and-I’ve-got-to-get-out-of-here speech. So she spoke fast, saying the first thing that came to mind. Something she’d wondered about since arriving at the ranch.
“Why don’t you have a dog?”
His mouth snapped shut and he stared at her as if she were speaking Urdu. “What?”
“A dog.” She stretched comfortably and smiled. “Cowboys. Dogs. They kind of go together, but you don’t have one. I was wondering why.”
Shaking his head a little, confusion shining in his eyes, he said, “That’s what you want to talk about? Now?”
Cass forced a casual shrug she really wasn’t feeling. “What would you rather talk about? How you’re a loner and this was a mistake and how you don’t want me to get my heart broken or anything—” She broke off and deepened her voice into an overly dramatic drawl. “I’m not the kind of man you need and you should just forget about all of this and realize that I’m not interested in forever?”
That confused look in his eyes was now tangled up with the first flares of irritation. She’d been right, of course. That’s exactly what he had been about to say. Apparently having her say it for him didn’t sit very well with Jake Hunter. Well, too bad.
Seconds passed in silence but for the log in the hearth that cracked in the heat and dropped to the grate below with a muffled crash.
“The ‘talk’ is unnecessary,” she assured him, ignoring that tiny ache in her heart. “So why not ask about the dog situation?”
He huffed out a breath and frowned. “I don’t know what to make of you.”
“Forthright, remember?” Internally, she scoffed at that. If she were really forthright, she’d be telling him that she was almost in love with him and all it would take was a tiny push from him to complete the fall. But that would be like yelling “fire!” He’d be out of this room so fast, her hair would lift in the wind.
His gaze narrowed on her. “Right.” Another second or two passed before he said, “I’ve got enough animals here that I have to care for. Don’t really need a dog, so I’ve never gotten one.”
She nodded. “I understand, but the horses and the cattle are business, aren’t they? A dog would be more company than anything else.”
“Who says I need company?” he challenged. “I’ve got twenty hands who work and live here—two of them with their wives—I’ve got my grandfather across the yard and plenty of clients who come and go. Not like I’ve got the time or the leisure to get lonely.”
Though his words were firm and it was clear that he believed them, Cass thought she’d never met a lonelier person in her life. True, Jake was surrounded by all the people he’d just named, but he never let them in. According to his grandfather, even he had to fight to maintain any level of closeness, and she knew Jake loved the older man.
“Cassie,” Jake said and the calm, patient tone of his voice caught her attention. “We really should talk about this.”
Cass didn’t want to. She didn’t want to see him pull away, didn’t want to hear words that had no meaning because she already knew there was no future here for her. So she rolled into him and slid
one arm around his waist. “No,” she said, looking up into his eyes. “We really don’t. I’m a big girl, Jake. I’m in your bed because I want to be here. You don’t owe me anything.”
Emotions too varied to read darted across his face before he reached for her and pulled her in tightly enough so that Cass could feel his desire stirring to life again.
“You puzzle me,” he admitted. “You never do or say what I expect you to.”
Her heart tumbled in her chest at the heat in his eyes. “That’s good,” she said, brushing her mouth across his. “I would really hate to be predictable.”
One corner of his mouth tipped up and he shook his head. “No worries there,” he assured her.
“Jake, there’s nothing we have to say to each other right now, okay?” She moved so that she could slide her fingers through his thick hair, each strand moving against her skin like a caress. “Let’s just take tonight and not dissect it.”
He seemed to think about it for a long minute. Then he said, “Storm’s over, you know. The road out should be cleared in a day or two.”
Another sharp stab of pain, regret, poked at her insides, but she ignored it. “Then in a day or two, I’ll be gone and we can both go back to our lives. Good enough?”
His arm around her tightened, and for one heartbeat, Cass thought that he didn’t like the idea of her leaving. She’d like to tell herself that he wanted her to stay. But the moment passed and she grimly reminded herself not to build illusions that would only shatter her later. Take what’s here, she thought. Take it and treasure it, then let it go. It was the only way.
“I think we’ve talked enough,” was all he said and then he dipped his head to take one pebbled nipple into his mouth.
Cass groaned and sighed all at once. Satisfaction and need curled together into a tangled knot until she didn’t know which was the stronger. She held his head to her breast, sliding her fingers through his hair as his mouth tormented her with gentle torture designed to have her quivering into a puddle of goo.
Take it. Treasure it.
Then let it go.
* * *
A few hours later, Jake lay quietly in the dark with Cass curled up into his side. She slept, her breathing deep and even, her arm draped across his chest, her legs entwined with his.
His body was, for the moment, at peace. But his mind wouldn’t shut off. The plain and simple truth was, he’d had his world rocked and he still wasn’t sure how he’d allowed it to happen.
She was in his bed. Nestled up next to him. And he should be jumping to his feet and making tracks. Yet instead, he stayed here, next to her, feeling her breath brush across his chest. Inhaling the scent of her, drawing it deep inside him. He felt her heartbeat, soft against him, and felt invisible manacles snap closed around his wrists.
Well, that mental image got him moving.
Carefully, he eased out from under her. She whispered in her sleep, then curled up in the warmth his body had left behind on the sheets. In the moonlight drifting through the windows, he looked at her, that soft spill of dark blond hair, her creamy smooth skin, the rise and fall of her breasts beneath the quilt they’d been sharing. And the view shook him to his bones.
Deliberately, he turned his back on the bed and the woman in it and stalked to the adjoining bathroom. He hit the wall switch and winced as the lights jumped to life. Black and white tiles, black granite and black sinks gleamed in the harsh light, but when he looked in the mirror, Jake saw a man on the edge.
He curled his fingers around the end of that cold granite and leaned into the mirror. “What the hell?”
He’d wanted her for days and had assumed, naturally, that the minute he’d had Cass, the need for her would wane. It always had before. Every woman who’d come through his life—including his ex-wife—had left absolutely zero impression on him. If they were there, he was with them, but when they were gone, he didn’t miss them. Hell, even when Lisa left him while he was still serving overseas, he’d been more pissed than hurt.
And when he’d come home, he’d easily gone on with his life without her.
Jake had always assumed that the lack was his. That there was just something missing within him that kept him from forming any kind of attachment to the women he encountered. But maybe, he thought now, it wasn’t him. Maybe it was the women he’d chosen in the past.
Because he had new evidence. Cass was asleep in his bed.
And he wanted her all over again.
He turned from the mirror and the questions he saw in his own eyes. Walking into the shower, he turned the faucets and purposely stood beneath a fall of icy water. He didn’t need more heat. Hell, he felt as if his blood were still boiling.
What he needed was cold. And distance. And some damn logic.
Lathering up the soap, he scrubbed his skin as if he could wash away her scent, but even as he tried, he had the feeling that he’d never be able to accomplish that. Cassidy Moore was a complication he hadn’t figured on. He had to mitigate the danger to himself by getting her off his mountain and back to Boston as fast as he could manage it.
Just because he’d taken her into his bed for the night didn’t mean that there was room in his life for her.
He was better off alone.
Six
Fourteen months later...
Cass’s world was imploding and all she could do was stand there and watch it go.
But then ever since she left Montana, her life had been nothing but one shock after another, she told herself, so really...what was one more?
Leaving Jake had been harder than she would have thought. That last morning on the ranch, he’d kept his distance until it was time for her to leave. Then, he’d waved her off with a casual air—no kiss, no hint of regret to see her go—as if what they’d shared had meant nothing to him, and the pain of that memory traveled with her. And still, when she was first home in Boston, Cass had actually expected Jake to call her. To admit that he missed her. Naturally, he didn’t. Stubborn man.
Then, two months after returning to Boston, Cass discovered that condoms weren’t foolproof. She smiled at the memory of her shock and the thin thread of panic that had shot through her. Despite all of that, though, she had been thrilled to find out she was carrying Jake’s baby. She’d always wanted a family of her own, and knowing that she would always have a piece of Jake with her had made missing him a little easier.
But the pregnancy had also meant she had to quit her job, because she couldn’t continue working with Elise and not tell her about the baby—her grandchild.
Just as Cass couldn’t tell Jake. Oh, her conscience had driven her nuts for weeks over that decision, but in the end, Cass knew it was for the best. Jake wanted to be alone and it was hard to be alone with a newborn in the house. And keeping her pregnancy from Elise wasn’t easy, but if the woman knew the truth, she would tell her son and then...oh, it was a vicious circle. So in the end, Cass had kept her secrets, given up her job and built a life for herself and her child.
Sure it was scary, being a single mother, but it was worth it. Her son was her world and until today, she would have said that everything was going great.
Of course, that was before her brother and sister had shown themselves to be traitors.
Panic nibbled at her insides and every breath was a victory because it had made it past the knot lodged in her throat. Her heartbeat was loud and heavy in her ears and chills raced along her spine as she tried to come to grips with the worst-case scenario playing out in front of her eyes.
“I still can’t believe you did this.”
Cass needed to move. To get up and walk. Maybe run. Problem was, there was nowhere to go. It was early December in Boston and even here, the snow was deep enough to make going for a walk less than pleasant.
So she settled for jumping up from the
chair by her front window and stalking the three short steps to the opposite wall and back again. Pacing was less than helpful when the confines were so small.
Ordinarily she had no problem with her tiny one-bedroom apartment. But today, with her family gathered, she could feel those walls shrinking. While she stalked angrily, she sent Claudia another hard glare. “You had no right.” Swinging her gaze to her brother, she added, “Either of you.”
Claudia was unbowed and unrepentant. Her long blond hair was done in a single braid with strands of plastic holly berries woven through it. She wore a green and red sweater that read Santa Knows How to Deliver and her dark blue jeans were tucked into knee-high black boots. “Somebody had to,” she said. “Dave and I talked about it and we decided—”
Cass turned her furious gaze on her younger brother. Dave’s blond hair was cut short and he kept stabbing his fingers through it as if remembering when he was a teenager and wore it to his shoulders. His brown leather jacket was worn, his jeans and steel-toed work boots looked battered, and his features clearly said he wished he were anywhere but there.
“How do you two get to make a decision about me?”
He growled a little, shot a hard look at their youngest sister and then looked back to Cass. He followed her as she moved back to her chair and dropped into it.
“We all talked about it. Me, Emma and Claud, and we agreed this was the best way to handle it.”
If she were any more furious Cassidy figured the top of her head might blow off and shoot right through the ceiling and the roof.
“You and your wife and our sister decided the best way to handle me? Since when have I needed to be ‘handled’?”
“Since you started acting as stubborn as a sack of rocks,” Claudia told her.
Another wave of rage swept through her and Cass had to fight to drag air into her lungs. “You had no right. Any of you. This is my life.”
The Cowboy's Pride and Joy Page 8
