by Lucy Daniels
Jack put his head on one side, then looked up at Miranda. ‘They were all lovely,’ he said, ‘but my favourite was a kitten.’
‘Oooooh!’ Miranda’s voice rose and fell. ‘What was the kitten’s name?’
Jack frowned. ‘I don’t know. Do you, Mummy?’ he looked up at Susan.
Susan shook her head. ‘I’m not sure they even have names yet. Which one did you like?’
‘The white one,’ he said, then turned his gaze to Miranda. ‘It had blue eyes,’ he said. ‘Really bright blue.’
‘That’s unusual for a cat, isn’t it? I bet it’s very pretty!’ Miranda reached out a hand to Jack, who took hers and together, they walked through into the warm kitchen.
‘Sit down,’ Miranda told them, letting go of Jack’s hand and pulling out a chair. ‘I’ve bought your favourite,’ she told Jack. Opening the oven, she pulled out a large pie. ‘Chicken and mushroom,’ she announced, ‘and duchess potatoes with peas, followed by jelly and ice cream.’ Susan rolled her eyes fondly. Her mum could rarely resist treating Jack to his favourite foods on every possible occasion. At least she’d finally managed to stop Miranda from giving him a whole bag of chocolate buttons on every single visit.
‘So what have you been up to, Mum?’ she asked. Her mouth watered as her mum set the food on the table. It really did look very tasty, she thought.
Miranda frowned. ‘I haven’t done all that much today,’ she said, ‘but I did run into an old friend of yours.’ She put some pie on Jack’s plate and began to spoon the peas.
Susan stiffened. Another old friend? She forced her shoulders down a millimetre. It was probably nothing.
‘Yes, it was Triss Herbert,’ Miranda said. Susan breathed out. When Susan had moved to Welford, Triss had taken over the flat she had vacated. Miranda handed Jack his plate.
‘And how was Triss?’ Susan asked. Not that she and Triss had been especially friendly, but she was relieved her mum wasn’t talking about the mysterious man from York.
Miranda pursed her mouth slightly as if puzzled. ‘I think she was fine,’ she said. ‘She certainly looked well, but she asked me if I could tell you that someone came round to the flat looking for you. A man, she said.’
The tension was back in Susan’s shoulders. ‘Did she say anything about him?’ Susan asked.
Miranda paused to hand Susan her plate. ‘Yes,’ she said, ‘he said he was from York and he was looking for you.’
‘Did he give his name? Or did she say what he looked like?’ Susan tried to keep her voice light as she pushed potatoes onto her fork. Miranda had been encouraging when she started online dating. She wasn’t so sure what her mum would think if she heard about Stalkery Steve.
‘Dark brown hair and eyes,’ Miranda said. ‘Very good-looking apparently.’ She set her own plate down, lifted her knife and fork and waggled her eyebrows slightly at Susan. ‘Anyone I know?’ she asked.
Susan swallowed, then shrugged and shook her head. ‘If I knew who it was, I could tell you if you know them,’ she replied, still trying to sound casual. Of course it might not have been Steve at all. This was the second time dark brown hair had been mentioned. A memory flitted into her head of another man from York, but she batted it away. He had told her long ago that he wanted nothing to do with her. ‘This is lovely pie,’ she said.
Miranda looked happy. ‘Glad you like it,’ she said. ‘Do you like it too, Jack?’
‘Mmmmm! It’s yummy, yummy, yummy!’ He beamed. ‘We’re going back to Hope Meadows next week,’ he told Miranda. ‘Maybe Mummy could take a photo of the kitten. Would you like to see?’
Miranda replied enthusiastically and before long, Jack was telling her all the details of the animals and about a trip they were planning to Rainbow Hill children’s farm, where there were llamas and where Holly and Robin, two donkeys that Mandy had rescued last year, lived. After that, he told her about the nursery Nativity. Susan ate slowly and started to relax again. It was a little odd that someone had been looking for her, but for all she knew, it might have been two separate people altogether. There were lots of men in the world with brown hair and eyes.
‘Are you finished?’ Miranda asked a few minutes later.
Susan smiled as she handed over her plate. ‘Yes thanks, it was lovely,’ she said.
‘We’ll go through,’ Miranda told her. She led them into the high-ceilinged sitting room. Opening the sideboard, she took out Jack’s toy box. Susan sat down on the couch as Miranda set the box down on the floor. Jack knelt beside it and started to pull out his favourites. The phone in Susan’s pocket buzzed and she pulled it out, feeling the tiniest wave of nervousness, but it was a message from Douglas, her newest potential match.
‘It would be lovely to meet up sometime soon,’ she read. ‘Please let me know when it would suit you.’ It was nice, she thought, that he didn’t seem to be pushy. The rest of the message was amusing, a little flirty, but never overstepping the mark. He’d signed off with a photo of a drawing, a little cartoon pony. It looked a little bit like Prince, the Welsh pony she’d had when she first moved to Yorkshire. She smiled.
‘What’s that you’ve got?’ Susan had momentarily forgotten about Miranda, but now her mum had sat down on the couch beside her. Susan held out the phone. ‘Now there’s a handsome face,’ Miranda cried. She tilted her head as if to inspect him better. ‘And what does he do?’
Her mum always wanted all the details of the men she was meeting. ‘He’s a children’s illustrator,’ she replied.
‘And is that one of his?’ Miranda asked, pointing to the pony drawing. She held the phone closer. ‘It’s lovely. You know, if only I was twenty years younger, I might have a bash at him myself. He really is very talented, isn’t he?’
Susan laughed and took the phone back. Though he was indeed quite good-looking, Douglas had an earthy look about him. Susan couldn’t imagine him with her mother, who had always been a stickler for well-brushed hair and a clean-shaven face. ‘I’m sure he’s not really your type, Mum,’ she said. She looked again at the photo: the bright-blue eyes and slightly shaggy haircut. He really did look very friendly. Attractive too in an unconventional way.
‘Nonsense, creative and handsome was always my type!’ Miranda waved a hand at Susan, laughing. ‘But seriously, darling, I can have Jack tomorrow if you’d like to meet him then.’
‘Really?’ Susan looked at her mum, who smiled and nodded.
‘If you’d like to meet up, I could manage tomorrow,’ she typed into the phone.
Within five minutes, Douglas had agreed and they had finalised the details. Susan felt a slight frisson run through her as she put the phone back in her pocket. She wasn’t quite sure what it was about Douglas. She was trying not to get her hopes up, but this was the first time she had felt really excited about a date for ages.
Just don’t run away at the first sign of Jack, or turn out to be a stalker, she thought. And we’ll go from there …
It was well after Jack’s bedtime when they got home. Despite the lateness of the hour, Susan took her time putting him to bed since she was going to miss bedtime tomorrow. She glanced around the room as she helped him into his pyjamas. She had begun to decorate a couple of weeks ago, but like everything else, it took a long time when she had to do it all herself. She had chosen a woodland theme, but as yet, she had only painted the first coat on two of the walls.
Once Jack was ready, he walked round the room, as he did every night, stopping to say good night to all his toys. He stopped at the window to wave to the birds in the garden, to Coffee across the road, to all the animals at Hope Meadows and even to Robin and Holly and the llamas at Rainbow Hill. Lastly, he waved up at the stars. ‘Night night, Marmalade,’ he said. He remembered poor Marmalade every night and he still looked sad. Susan had only once suggested getting a new pet. Jack had stiffened immediately and shaken his head hard. Susan hadn’t tried again.
Once he’d finished at the window, Susan pulled the curtain shut and followed hi
m across the room. He hadn’t been a good sleeper when he’d been younger so she always tried to make his bedtime routine as relaxing as possible. She tucked him into the little car-shaped bed that Miranda had bought him before they had realised just how animal-mad he was going to be.
‘Night night, sweetheart,’ she said, kissing him on the forehead, smoothing his hair back.
‘Nighty night, Mummy,’ he replied.
She smiled, straightened, walked to the door and switched the light off. ‘See you in the morning,’ she whispered.
Closing the door, she walked across the tiny landing and into her own bedroom. Leaving the door ajar, she made her way over to her wardrobe. In the mirror on the door, she caught sight of the room behind her. The walls were cream coloured, the furniture rather old-fashioned and heavy. Her bed was covered with a crushed-velvet throw in a rich red colour and there were three paintings on the wall. One of them had been painted by Clive Moon, the former occupant of Moon Cottage. It was an abstract view of the fells as seen from behind Welford Church. It had hung in her parents’ house when she was younger. Miranda had given it to Susan when her dad had died.
The only sign of Jack in here was a framed photo that stood on her bedside table. Though she loved being his mum with every fibre of her being, there were moments when she wanted to be just herself. To be Susan Collins, young woman, rather than Susan Collins, Jack’s mum.
She pulled open the wardrobe, looked inside and took out a slinky black dress. Slipping it over her head, she looked at herself in the mirror. Could she get away with this tomorrow? She and Douglas were going to a smart restaurant. It would be nice to feel really special. Sidling over to her dressing table, she found a pair of gold-and-pearl earrings and a matching necklace and put them on. She had a smart pair of boots that would be suitable even if it was raining. She walked back over to the mirrored wardrobe door. She couldn’t help feeling happy with what she saw. She tucked her brown hair behind her ears to highlight the soft glow of the dangling pearls, then turned round and admired herself from different angles. This was definitely the outfit, she thought. Suddenly, she couldn’t wait for the next day.
Chapter Four
‘It’s your turn at the water table now, Ella.’ Susan watched as Ella dropped the saucepan she was banging and rushed over to grab an apron. ‘Neil?’ Neil, who was emptying a cup of water through the millwheel, appeared not to notice. ‘Neil?’ Susan said more loudly. Neil looked up. ‘That’s your time up,’ Susan told him.
Neil’s chin quivered. ‘But I want to play in the water,’ he wailed. His bottom lip turned inside out and he began grizzling.
For a moment, Susan wished she could put her fingers in her ears. It had been raining hard all day and they’d been stuck inside. Instead, she put on her brightest smile as she undid Neil’s apron string. ‘Let’s see,’ she said and glanced round the room. Her eyes stopped on Noah, who was playing in the toy kitchen. ‘Look,’ she said to Neil as she mopped him with a paper towel. ‘You could go and play in the kitchen, if you like.’ The toy cooker with its pots and pans was Neil’s favourite and Noah was his best friend. Still sniffling, Neil trudged off.
Susan glanced at her watch. There was a class visit due at three o’clock. Just a few minutes more and they would have to tidy up. She made her way over to Nina, who was beside the sand table. ‘Ten minutes to go till the class visit, Nina,’ she murmured.
Nina’s eyes continued to scan the classroom, but she glanced sideways at Susan. ‘Who’s coming?’ she asked.
Susan wrinkled her nose. ‘I’m not actually sure,’ she said. ‘It’s an author, coming to read a book. Mrs Armitage arranged it.’
Mrs Armitage was the owner of the nursery. She was a lovely woman with a propensity for making last-minute arrangements. There would be paperwork somewhere, but Susan had been caught up at lunchtime when little Kieran had bumped his head and she hadn’t had a chance to look.
‘Is it a Christmas book?’ Nina asked.
Susan gave the tiniest shake of her head. ‘I really don’t know,’ she said with a sideways grin at Nina. ‘It’ll be a lovely surprise for us as well as the children.’
Nina laughed. ‘Ready for anything,’ she said. ‘That’s our motto!’
Susan smiled. ‘Ready for anything,’ she agreed.
A scream sounded on the other side of the room. Christina and Neil were fighting over a toy car. Noah was yelling. Susan rushed across: better to intervene before anyone was hurt.
Just as she retrieved the car, the classroom door crashed open. A man bounded into the room, clutching a briefcase under one arm. His flame-coloured hair stood on end and a shaggy beard engulfed his lower jaw. Well over six feet of lumbering man-mountain, dressed in a bright red T-shirt, and baggy hiking trousers. Catching sight of Nina, he stretched out a hand and strode towards her. Beside Susan, Christina’s howl came to an abrupt halt. All eyes were on the newcomer. He loped across the room, his grin widening.
‘Hello!’ he boomed. Then as if in slow motion, his foot caught one of the miniature chairs, his body twisted, his arms flailed. Like a falling tree, he crashed to the floor, breaking a chair and upending the art table. His ungainly body lay spread-eagled on the tiles as a cloud of glitter started to descend.
Susan started towards him. Around the room, giggles began to emerge. To Susan’s relief, the man sat up. The face under the unruly beard flushed red. As Susan approached, he let out an embarrassed giggle. ‘Sorry,’ he muttered, with a thick Scottish burr. He eyed the broken chair and grimaced. ‘I’ll pay for that,’ he said.
‘Don’t worry, it was an accident. Are you okay?’ Susan said, offering her hand to help him up. She glanced at him again as he took it. She had seen him before, she thought. For a moment, she couldn’t work out why his face was familiar, then in a flash it came to her: it was Douglas MacLeod from LoveSpark. She watched as his open friendly glance turned to wide-eyed recognition. The thought hammered in her head. Don’t say it. Please don’t say it. Her heart pounded in her throat as he stood up, just as Nina arrived beside them.
He gasped. ‘You’re Susan, right? From LoveSpark!’
As soon as he’d said it, his face turned an even darker shade of red and he glanced around, seeming to realise what he’d just said in front of a whole nursery class. From the corner of her eye, Susan saw Nina’s eyes widen. Heat rose in her face. Her cheeks were burning.
‘Is that your real name, Miss?’ Christina was staring from Susan to Douglas and back again. ‘What’s LoveSpark?’
Susan glanced at Nina. Nina cringed, but Susan could see the sympathy behind the horror. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘My first name is Susan.’ She cleared her throat.
‘LoveSpark’s a bookshop,’ Douglas said, in a very calm, assured voice. ‘I met Miss Collins there.’ His eyes were glued to Susan’s face, urgently sending his apologies.
Noah frowned. ‘That’s not what LoveSpark is,’ he objected. ‘It’s on computers. It’s where mummies go to find new daddies, that’s what my mum says.’
Susan wished she could crawl into the miniature playhouse in the corner of the room and hide until the end of the day. She couldn’t bring herself to look at Jack.
‘There’s a bookshop too.’ This time it was Nina who spoke. ‘You must be the author.’ She held out a hand to Douglas, who shook it heartily, his eyes filled with gratitude.
Susan took a deep breath and pushed her shoulders back. ‘Yes, everyone,’ she said. ‘This gentleman is an author. His name is Mr MacLeod and he writes books.’ The children were still all eyes. Christina opened her mouth, but Susan held up her hands. ‘I want everyone to go sit in the book corner,’ she said. ‘Mr MacLeod, I’ll get you a chair.’ To her relief, Christina shut her mouth with a snap and scurried towards the carpet with the others.
Finally, Douglas seemed to gather himself into something approaching professionalism. He sat down on the chair Susan brought him. Even when seated, he towered above the children like a giant. They stared up at
him, seemingly fascinated with his hugeness and his crazy hair and beard. ‘Hello there!’ he boomed. ‘My name is Douglas MacLeod and I’m here to take you on a magical journey.’ He reached down to the briefcase he had set at his feet and pulled out a book. He held it up, showing them the cover. ‘The Adventures of Frosty and Snowflake,’ Susan read. Above the title, a pair of sweet hedgehogs were scampering side by side into a tangled wintery wood.
Douglas opened the front cover and began to read. His oversized hands were surprisingly expressive and he pulled funny faces as he spoke. Each of the characters had a different voice. Susan looked round the faces of her class. Every single one seemed alight with interest. Her eyes lingered for a while on Jack. He seemed just as delighted as the rest.
She looked again at Douglas. Was he really this scruffy? she wondered. Or had he deliberately messed up his hair? It looked almost as if he’d gelled it into spikes. That must be for the children’s benefit … right? Several times he was playing the buffoon so much that he almost fell off his chair. It seemed he was even more wild in person than he’d looked online. She couldn’t help cringing a little at the thought of being out with him. Perhaps he couldn’t help being clumsy, but he seemed to be revelling in it. He laughed often, a great honking laugh that set the children off, but put her teeth on edge. Would he turn up on their date in the same unkempt state?
She pictured herself sitting opposite him in a nice restaurant and winced. She had built him up into something special in her mind, but now she was filled with doubt. Could she tell him she’d changed her mind? She wracked her brains for something that she could say that wouldn’t embarrass him.
His story drew to a close. He looked round and grinned at Susan and in an instant she knew she couldn’t say a word. For all his ungainliness, she couldn’t escape the feeling that he was kind. She wouldn’t hurt his feelings, she thought. She would see him tonight and then back out. Lots of pairings never made it past the first date.
