Robby looked like he belonged on Wall Street, whereas Sam had his whole woodsy lumberjack thing. Even so, the love and respect was palpable.
Except this was the first time I’d felt like an outsider. Since the second Sam and I walked out of the arrival gates and he made it clear he wanted me to stay, Robby had been nothing but welcoming. This was the first time where I felt I’d overstepped. How could I not? I’d been reading to their frail mother, from a sacred book, acting like I was part of the family.
The silence continued until I couldn’t take it anymore. I stood up, the scraping of the stool across the kitchen floor making my movements all the more awkward. It seemed to snap them out of their weird silent conversation.
“Why don’t you go upstairs and relax for a bit? I’ll be up in a moment once I check in with the nurse.”
Taking his question for what it was, a dismissal from a family moment, I nodded and left.
We were set up in the guest suite in Robby’s apartment. Shutting the door to the bedroom, I quickly stripped and headed for the large bathroom to run a bath. As much as I’d been focusing on Sam and to a certain extent Robby, I could feel the building tension rising from the intensity of the situation, and I needed to relax. The lack of sleep was making me crazy. That had to be it. How else could I explain the fact that I was practically jealous of his brother?
Of course it was more than simple jealousy. It was the realization that I was still virtually a stranger here, despite all the ridiculously intimate moments I’d been witness and party to in the past few days. I was an outsider to this family.
There hadn’t been a chance for Sam and I to even talk about what this was between us. And what was this? I didn’t know and I was pretty sure he didn’t either. Whatever Gloria saw in her son’s eyes when he looked at me was probably nothing more than mild affection. Letting my hair down, I slipped into the water, relishing the sinking feeling, the warm water coasting over me as I let the stress float away.
Sliding farther down until my ears were submerged, I lost myself in the mute echoing sensation, remembering that until Gloria’s words of affection, I was complicit in keeping my relationship with Sam vague. Because if I kept it vague, I could ignore the building attachment. Ignore the strange, strong connection we had. Because there was no denying there was something between us, no matter how much I wanted it to just be sex.
But I would try.
I would ignore the fact that I’d flown across the country to help him through his panic attack and get him to his brother. I would ignore the way he turned to me in the hospital room when the nurse changed Gloria’s IV needle, as if just looking at me could keep him grounded. I would ignore the way he lost himself in me. It wasn’t just now when he needed to feel something besides the fear of loss but as soon as we got together. When it was just us in our neighboring cabins, we connected like two lost lovers, frolicking in the woods, wild spirits with no past fears, no wounds tentatively stitched together with the hopes that no one could see the weak spots.
But those weak spots were still there, in both of us. I couldn’t figure his out, and I sure as hell wasn’t ready to show him mine and hope he treated them with care.
Rising up out of the water, I heard him moving in the bedroom. I stayed still, silently watching over the edge of the bath as he opened the bathroom door and walked in. His shirt was already off. It was as if he knew what I needed. Our eyes met, but we stayed silent, having our own secret conversation, one that spoke of need and lust, strength and belonging. But mostly of need.
Because that I couldn’t ignore.
He needed me.
And I needed him.
Chapter Eleven
Sam
Who could have guessed that finding Katy reading to our mother from her favorite book would be what made Robby snap, but it was. As soon as Katy left, he practically collapsed. Robby, my little brother who was used to dealing with CEOs who made more in an hour than most people made in a month, was spooked by that damn book of poetry.
I always stayed strong for my mother. That was my job, my role in our broken but solid family. Robby was the joker, always keeping things light, keeping our mother laughing at his antics and stories. And it had been too long since he’d heard her laugh.
It was more than that. Seeing Katy brought home the reality that despite ourselves we’d somehow ended up married and then divorced to women as cutthroat as we could find.
The unspoken reality of our past choices was starkly present in our mother’s room as Katy’s melodic voice read through poetry that meant so much to the woman who’d raised us. Our ex-wives would have probably complained if they had to take care of our old mother. Let alone read to her. Hell, I couldn’t even imagine Cecilia being willing to hang out in a hospital room, and she never would have offered to help out with my mother when I wasn’t around.
Robby didn’t talk about his ex much but having lived through my own disastrous marriage and divorce, I knew the lesson learned had been a hard one for him.
Katy just brought it all home.
He didn’t want Katy, I knew that, but he wanted what she had to offer. He wanted to grow our family. He wanted my mom to have the daughter-in-law she always wanted. We’d let our mother down, not that she would ever tell us that. But we did. With Katy around us, smoothing out the wrinkles, alleviating the stress, like some damn magic silent woodland fairy, Robby was suffering. It was the worst kind of envy.
I stalked over to her, my cock hardening as she rose out of the bath. Her long hair, even longer now that it was wet, clung around her body. I held out my hand to help her step out. The bath was free of bubbles, something that struck me as intrinsically Katy. Warm, fluid, adaptable. No fuss, no frills, no need for complications and extravagance. Most women would have filled it with scented crap, lit candles, and put their hair up so it didn’t get wet. Not Katy. The simple comfort of warm bath, that was what she needed. And now I needed her.
Again.
I couldn’t seem to get enough of her. At first I thought it had to do with the situation we were in, facing mortality, even though the doctors had reassured us over and over again that my mother was going to be okay as long as she took it easy. Despite all that, the threat of it hovered around us. It was easing back with each day but still there in our peripheral vision. That night in the parking lot, when she touched me, let me know it was all right to have this want, this need, this lust only she could appease, it pushed my need for her to another level.
Thinking back to when we first met, just over ten days ago, I knew it wasn’t the call from Robby or the fear of my mother dying that was forging this connection. It was just her. Us. This magnetic out-of-control animalistic need to connect with her was driving me on.
Her warm, wet body called to me and I pulled her flush against me, running my hands down to cup her ass. God, it wasn’t just having a wet and willing woman’s body pressed against me that made me hard. It was Katy’s wet, willing, and warm body. I knew without a doubt that when I slipped my fingers between her thighs, a certainty if there ever was one, I’d find her slippery and ready for me. I guided us over to the sink and turned her around, placing her hands on the countertop. Our gazes met in the mirror, and I held hers as I pulled her hips out and unbuttoned my jeans. I released my cock with an aching need that had grown beyond a bearable comfort level.
Darkened, twisted tendrils covered her back, her skin shimmering with water and sweat. She looked like some kind of damn sea goddess. Leaning over, I kissed her shoulder, pressing against her ass, letting her feel how ready I was to take her.
“You’re like a siren, Katy.” Her hooded eyes stared back at me as her breath quickened in anticipation. “Hold on to the counter, baby.”
Nodding imperceptibly, she tilted her hips up farther, pushing into me.
“It’s your turn, Katy. Tell me what you need, tell me what you want.” I leaned forward, placing one hand next to hers on the counter, the other one reaching around to c
up her breast.
“Oh, God, Sam.”
I continued to tease her, rolling her nipple between my fingers, rubbing my cock against her ass. She kept my gaze, but didn’t give me an answer.
“Come on, Katy, it’s not a hard question. You want my mouth? Want my tongue to slip inside you, make you come on my face?” A keening whimper escaped her mouth, but I kept going. “My fingers? Maybe push three up there, keep you riding my hand until it’s soaking wet?” Releasing her nipple, my hand slid down her stomach, flickering softly over her pulsing clit, giving her a hint of what was to come. “Or maybe something harder, something bigger, something that fills you up.” I moved my hand to her lower belly and pressed hard. “Until you feel me here, so deep you know you’ll ache.”
“I don’t know. I don’t know.” She shook her head in despair and frustration.
“You don’t know what you want, baby? Or you don’t know how to ask for it. I think you know what you want.” With my mouth next to her ear, I whispered softly. “Because you want what I want.”
“I just want you, Sam. Just you.”
Keeping eye contact, I bent my knees slightly, reached between us, and drove home slowly but firmly until she took all of me. She tried to rise on her tiptoes, but I held her hips in position, keeping her low enough so she felt every inch of me.
“You’ve got me, baby, all of me. Anytime you want me, anything at all, I’m all yours.”
I moved in and out, slowly but firmly, taking the time to enjoy her. It was different this time. I wanted her to know what she meant to me, even though I couldn’t even begin to express it myself. The connection between was unique. As I watched her try and keep her eyes open as I played with her clit and languidly pumped into her, I knew it couldn’t be broken.
Whatever this was, this thing, it was meant to last.
Katy threw back her head and closed her eyes. Feeling her start to flex around my cock, I leaned forward, my chest pressed hard against her back, and rocked against her. There was no way I’d find this again, no way another woman could feel this good, make me feel this good. Her orgasm hit her and as she clenched around me. She reached her hand up to grab the back of my head, her fingers desperately grasping. I loved the way she went for my hair and the slight sting of her fist as it tightened was enough to send me over the edge.
Pulsing into her, I came, luxuriating in the fact that we didn’t have to use condoms anymore. She’d sleep with my cum inside her tonight.
Marked by me.
Owned by me.
Just me.
Chapter Twelve
“I just want you, Sam. Just you.”
I opened my eyes, her words reverberating through my mind, over and over. A cold sweat covered my body and I slid out of bed, surprised to see Katy was already up, despite the time. She’d been doing that every day since we’d arrived—getting up early to make coffee and occasionally buy breakfast before Robby and I were up, but it was six in the morning. Was this what time she usually got up, and I’d been too tired to notice?
Just you.
Those two words kept coming back as I took my shower and made coffee. There was a note on the kitchen counter saying she’d gone out to run an errand. All week, she’d been doing “errands” when really it turned out to be thoughtful gestures. It usually made me smile, the fact that she would go out by herself, purchasing whatever the hell she decided was needed. Her independence and free spirit were exactly what this situation required.
This time though, it pissed me off. Our morning was busy and I didn’t have time to worry about her or wonder when she was going to show up.
Just you.
There it was again. I couldn’t get those words to stop circulating in my head.
Two words. Those were the words she’d given me when I asked her what she wanted. What the hell did that even mean? Just me. Just?
Robby joined me in the kitchen, looking like he’d barely slept.
“You look like shit.” My bad mood had no bounds, and I had no hesitation taking it out on Robby.
“Well, maybe if I got to fuck a beautiful girl until she passed out, I’d sleep as well as you do.”
“Damn, are we keeping you up?” We’d already invaded his apartment and even though that was the only practical thing to do at the moment, I was suddenly acutely aware of how much Robby’s personal space was being monopolized. Despite being pissed off for no good reason, I didn’t like the thought of invading his space.
“I’m busting your balls, man. If I had girl like Katy around to help burn off the stress, I’d be doing the same thing.”
“A girl like Katy? What’s that supposed to mean?” The edge in my voice was deliberately hard.
Robby put down his mug of coffee before answering. “Don’t be a dick. You know I wasn’t being disrespectful. I meant a woman who looks like her, treats you like you’re a fucking king, puts up with all your shit, my shit, and our mom’s shit. I mean, what the fuck? You know what I meant.”
“Yeah, she’s pretty perfect.”
“Fuck, yeah she’s perfect. I can’t believe you ran into her living in the woods.”
“Maybe she’s too perfect.”
It was his turn to question me now. “What the hell does that mean? How can she be too perfect?”
“I mean exactly that. Look, you and I both managed to marry gold-diggers, and we didn’t even realize it until they had the rings around their fingers. People use the term gold-digger like it’s a bad thing, but there’s a fucking art to trapping a man. That shit takes skill, and there’s more than one way to do it. Sure, Katy doesn’t fit the mold. Doesn’t mean I’m wrong to be suspicious. I’ve never met a woman as gorgeous, kind, generous, smart, fucking awesome in bed, and fun as Katy. Doesn’t that tell you something?”
“Yeah, that Cecilia did more of a number on you than I realized. What the hell, man? Katy is not a gold-digger. The woman is just a good person. That’s it. Don’t fuck this up now because of some weird shit you haven’t had a chance to work through.”
“She works in a fucking coffee shop, living in some tiny cabin. I know how much her rent is and it’s basically free. She’s got nothing—no money, no future, and look at her now.” I waved my hand, gesturing to the luxurious apartment. “I told her I had plenty of money, that both you and I had done pretty well for ourselves. Fuck, for all I know she’s just conning me.” A headache was starting to hammer away at the back of my skull, and Robby’s silence was adding to the growing irritation.
“Do what you got to do, Sam. You always fucking do anyway.”
“I will. But it means I need to you deal with Mom this morning on your own. I’ll be back later.” Without waiting for an answer, I got up and headed toward Robby’s office.
There was a ticket I needed to buy.
Katy came back an hour later and I was ready. Without so much as a kiss hello, I walked into the bedroom and told her to pack up her things.
“We’re going to the airport?”
“Yeah, something’s come up. I’ll meet you downstairs in twenty minutes.”
I didn’t give her a chance to say anything before I shut the door and headed out of the apartment. I couldn’t watch her pack up. She’d ask questions and then I’d lose it. Because there was nothing to say, just that I needed her gone.
I needed her out of my life so I could focus. She couldn’t have just me. My family needed me. I wasn’t about to be tied down to some woman just because she knew how to charm the pants off me and my family. While waiting in the lobby, another cold sweat settled over me and I clenched my fists to try and calm down.
This was harder than I thought, but that didn’t mean it was the wrong choice. So she was charming and sweet. That didn’t mean anything. It was just another form of seduction. It didn’t take a genius to realize my family was the most important thing in my life, and I knew from direct experience that a woman would say and do just about anything to get what she wanted.
I had a cab waiti
ng for us when she came down, and I guided her in before I put her bag in the trunk.
Sliding in next to her, I made sure to keep my distance. The last thing I needed was her touching me. Or more realistically, me touching her. I could never keep my hands off her for long and it was an exercise in self-control.
“The physical therapist starts today, right?” she asked.
“Yeah. Robby’s going to meet her.” I didn’t turn to look at her, just kept looking out the window. She didn’t ask anything else, obviously getting the message that I didn’t want to talk, until we pulled up at the airport. I let her get out first, before leaning in and telling the driver to wait.
Her bag felt heavy as I placed it down next to her.
“Can you please say goodbye to your mother for me? And give her this.” I looked up, unable to hide the surprise on my face. She handed over a gift-wrapped book. “I got it this morning.”
The present felt like it was made of lead, and I sighed when she finally met my gaze. “Were you going to wait until I was sitting alone on the plane to tell me I was going home by myself? You don’t even have a bag with you. I’m not stupid. Ticket for one, right? It’s Carl Phillips, by the way. The book, I mean. I had to go to a few different places to find the collection I wanted, but I think she’ll like it.”
Her voice was flat and I straightened up, shoving my free hand in my pocket to stop myself from tucking her hair behind her ear.
“It’s better this way. You don’t need to be here.” It came out sharp and hard, a bark almost.
“You mean you don’t need me here. Anymore.”
“Fine. If that’s what you want to hear. I need to take care of my family. I can’t have you around me, distracting me. And you need to get back to your life. The coffee shop…” I trailed off because I knew she was going back to nothing and that was what made this so horrible.
We’d needed each other. I needed her. And now I couldn’t cope with that. I couldn’t deal with having her around me, the sweet way she talked to my mom, the takeout she went out and got, knowing Robby and I would be starving in the middle of the night when my mom was having a hard time sleeping and we were sitting up keeping her company, reading that damn book to my mom with that voice of hers that I now couldn’t get out of my head.
The Woodsman (Lust in the Woods Book 1) Page 7
