He laughed, then made a mock-serious face. “A challenge, huh? I’ll be ready. See you in gym, Towers.”
Trading smiles, we split up. Maybe I had to ease up with this zero-boy policy. Yes, I’d been at Canterwood for almost a week and a half. Yes, I’d vowed to focus on riding and school for a while. I also didn’t want to miss anything. If there was potential for Drew and me to become closer friends and possibly more, I owed it to myself to at least be open-minded.
This was a time when I needed my besties from home! I pulled out my BlackBerry and opened our group chat.
Lauren:
Know u guys r in class, but I have boy news 2 tell u! Any1 4 Skype 2nite?
I felt better after sending the message. Brielle and Ana would know what to do.
“Hey!” Zack called, waving at me from yards away. Garret, his friend, was beside him. He waved, too.
“Hi!” I called back.
The need to talk to Khloe about Zack resurfaced full force. I’d managed to keep it in check until now. Khloe had been so excited about his response to her silly text pic—she’d told me right away. Despite what Lexa had said, I still couldn’t understand why Khloe hadn’t told me about her date. She’d had plenty of time to BBM. Even just a Got big news to share!! would have made everything okay.
I pulled open the heavy wooden door to the history building. All of my focus was on finding Khloe. I didn’t even slow to take in the beauty of the building, the way I had every day since I’d arrived. I hurried past the stained-glass windows, under the arched beams of the ceiling, and past the quotes of famous historical figures painted on the walls.
When I reached Mr. Spellman’s classroom, I looked for blond hair. Khloe, sitting in the middle of the classroom, saw me and smiled. My stomach felt like I’d eaten too much Halloween candy.
I settled into a seat in the row next to Khloe and put down my bag.
“Hey, hey,” Khloe said. “How’s your day? I haven’t had a second to BBM or anything! Crazy!”
So, she wasn’t going to say anything right away. Warning bells chimed in my head.
“Good,” I said. “I ran into Lexa this morning. We chatted for a bit.” I stopped, wanting her to jump in.
“Cool. I’m glad you saw Lex! I’m sorry I couldn’t leave with you this morning. Ugh. It was one of those mornings where I lose everything possible.”
I leaned down, pulling out my thick history textbook, homework folder, and assignment notebook.
“Khlo, I don’t want to let things get weird, so I want to just say it. When I saw Lexa, she told me something about you and Zack.”
Khloe’s brown eyes, lids dusted with a shimmery mink color, widened. “Oh, no. Oh, Laur. She told you that Zack asked me out last night.”
I nodded.
“Lauren, I am so sorry. I know how awful this looks. If I were you, I’d be mad and hurt. Please let me explain. I got the text after you’d fallen asleep. I almost had to tie myself down to stop from waking you up!” She shook her head. “I was such a bad roommate. I started making noise in my closet hoping it would wake you.”
“You could have for that news,” I said. “That’s huge.”
“I wanted to! You were in such a deep sleep and I knew how exhausted you were from the past few days. On a whim, I texted Lexa to see if she was awake. She’s usually in bed fairly early. But she was up and I told her about Zack.”
I nodded again. My head was going to bobble off if I kept this up.
Khloe chewed her bottom lip. She looked as sad as I felt.
“Everything was a mess this morning. I was dying to tell you—seriously dying—but I wanted to talk about it when we had time. There is so much to talk about—not just ‘OMG, Zack asked me out!’ but what did that mean, how much did he really like me, what prep were we going to do for Friday. You know? I wanted it to be an after-school, in-our-pj’s convo with snacks. Not when we were rushing out the door to class.”
Everything Khloe said made sense. I had been tired, and of course she’d wanted to make it into a big moment—that was Khloe. And Zack officially asking her out was huge.
“Lexa caught me off guard,” I said. “My feelings were hurt because you’d told her and hadn’t said a word about it to me all morning.”
Khloe hung her head, her shoulders drooping.
“But Lexa wouldn’t have said anything if she didn’t think you’d already told me. She wasn’t trying to rub it in that she knew first. If it were me and I had news like that, I’d probably think the same thing as you. I’d want the right moment to talk about it.”
Khloe lifted her head a little, meeting my eyes.
“I understand where you’re coming from,” I said. “I’m not mad. I get it. And I’m crazy excited!”
“OhthankyouLauren!” Khloe’s words ran together. She reached across the aisle, arms outstretched, and we hugged. I smelled Khloe’s familiar Coach Poppy perfume and coconut-scented shampoo. I couldn’t be mad at her. She’d been trying to do the right thing and I could feel how genuinely sorry she was.
“’Course, Khlo. I want to hear everything and when we find the right time—”
“Um, we’re going to make the right time!” Khloe interrupted, grinning. “Tonight, after riding, want to get into cozies and talk before homework?”
“Hmm . . .” I pretended to think about it. “Yes! I want to hear the complete play-by-play—what you thought when you saw his text, how long you took to write back, what you said word for word. All of it.”
Khloe silently clapped her hands. “Yay!”
The classroom door closed with a thud. I looked up, not even noticing the room had filled with students.
I looked over at Khloe. “We okay?” she asked.
“Very okay.”
Mr. Spellman was bent over his desk. He ran a hand through his dark hair peppered with gray. I noticed another odd figurine had been added to his desk—an owl with wide yellow eyes. Very Mr. Spellman. He’d quickly become one of my fave teachers. His advanced class wasn’t easy, but I liked history.
“Morning, everyone,” he said.
“Good morning,” we said.
“Let me run through attendance, then I’ll pass back the classwork you completed yesterday.”
He called down the roll and I got out the rest of my supplies, waiting until he called “Lauren Towers” before responding with a wave of my hand.
He gathered our stack of papers and began handing them out. During yesterday’s class he’d given each of us a lined paper with a question to answer. Each of us had received a different question that corresponded to the reading we’d done the night before. The prompts had to be in short essay format.
There was an optional extra credit question at the bottom that we were allowed to try once we’d answered the main question. Luckily, I’d had enough time last night to answer the main prompt and extra credit question. The topics had covered the early American colonies—something I was familiar with—so I felt fairly confident that my grade would be good.
Mr. Spellman stopped beside me, placing my paper on my desktop. I turned it over and put it flat on my desk.
In the upper right corner a small D+ had been circled. Comments swam in front of me, but I couldn’t even read them.
D+. It didn’t register. D+. Oh, mon Dieu! D+?! I flipped the paper over, slowly, not wanting to draw attention to myself. I fought the burn that threatened to turn my ears, face, and neck red.
Khloe looked at me. Okay? she mouthed.
“Fine,” I whispered.
Mr. Spellman reached Khloe and I saw the B+ on her paper. Khloe was uninterested in her paper, though; she went back to watching me. I could feel her question coming, but I pretended to be looking for something in my assignment notebook. Mr. Spellman finished passing out the papers and there wasn’t time for her to push me more about my grade.
It was beyond mortifying and too embarrassing to tell anyone! I’d read and reread the chapter before I’d come to class. Plus, I had co
me into the class knowing about the British colonies. The second I got out of history and could lock myself in the privacy of the girls’ bathroom, I was going over my paper. I had no idea where I’d gone wrong.
For the remainder of the period, I was a model student. Not one BBM to anyone. Notes on everything Mr. Spellman said. Volunteering to read aloud passages from our book. Copying due dates from the board. But none of those things made me feel better.
The bell rang and Khloe reached for my arm. “You okay? You were like superstudent Lauren.”
“I’m okay,” I said. “I didn’t get the best grade on my paper and I was doing my overcompensating act.” I looked down at my notebook. “I think I took six pages of notes. Need any?”
Khloe smiled. “Maybe later. Hey, sorry about your grade. You work really hard and it was just one assignment. I know you’ll pull it up.”
“Thanks.” I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. In fact, I didn’t want to look at it either. “Ready to leave for English?”
Khloe and I gathered our things and left. I wished I could leave my grade behind too.
13
SUGAR HEAVEN
I INHALED THE TANTALIZING FALL SMELLS OF apple cider and pumpkin pie that made The Sweet Shoppe smell like heaven. I slid into an empty booth to wait for Cole. The cushy blue booth with a white rectangular table in front of me was adorable. Everything about this place helped me forget about my awful history grade. A cup of tea would soothe the last of my rattled nerves.
Cole walked in, not a minute late, and spotted me. “Hi, Laur,” he said, sliding across from me. He put his messenger bag next to him.
“Hey,” I said. “I’m so excited about the cooler weather menu.”
Cole waved his hand. “You haven’t seen anything yet. They somehow manage to keep concocting fresh menu items every season. Soon they’ll start adding Halloween and then Christmas-themed stuff.”
“Too cool! It’s like a quainter, nicer Starbucks with more options.”
Cole nodded. “Definitely. I’m glad you wanted to meet up. Want something to eat and drink? My treat.”
“You don’t have to—”
Cole waved me off. “What’ll it be? Some kind of tea and . . .”
Major hearts that he remembered my tea love! “Cinnamon apple tea and a dessert of your choice to split if you want would be perfect. Thank you.”
Cole smiled. “Be right back.”
Cole was the sweetest. I wanted to hang out with him more—he seemed like such a nice guy. He got in line behind a couple of students. He wasn’t hard to spot in breeches and paddock boots among the students in regular clothes. I pulled out my BlackBerry and saw messages.
Brielle:
Can’t talk 2nite. Tmrw?
Ana:
Free 2nite!
I typed back to both.
Lauren:
B, no worries! Tmrw 4 sure. Ana, yay! C u in a bit.
I couldn’t talk long because of my load of homework, but I needed to see someone from home. Khloe was studying with Clare, so I could talk freely to Ana about my roomie worries.
Cole came back, carrying two lidded orange cups in a cardboard holder. A plate of sugar cookies was in his other hand.
“This is awesome. Thanks, Cole!”
“No prob. Next dessert’s on you.” He sat, smiling.
“What’d you get?” I asked.
“Pumpkin spice latte,” he said. “I drink so much of these every year that I get sick of them by the season’s end. I swear I’ll never drink another. But that feeling disappears every year.”
We laughed.
“So,” I said. “I want to thank you, first, for not being angry with me because of my secret. Lexa told me how cool you were when she told you. I appreciate your understanding more than I can tell you.”
Cole wrapped his hands around his drink, nodding. “Laur, of course. You haven’t even been here a month. I’m sure it made you feel awful enough to keep that kind of thing to yourself, so what good would it do for any of us to be mad? We’re teammates, but I’d like to be friends.”
“Me too,” I said.
“I know Lexa told you about my past experiences with bullies. When I first got to Canterwood, I felt as though I had to keep it a secret that I was a rider who loved fashion or I’d get beaten up.”
My chest burned as if I’d scalded it with tea. “It’s so cruel what happened to you. I’m sorry.”
“They were ignorant,” Cole said. “I think they were afraid to breathe the same air.”
I clenched my teeth.
“This isn’t about me. I just wanted you to know that I understand. You can talk to me any time if you want.”
What I wanted to do was to hug him. “Thank you so much. Same for you. Here . . .”
I pulled out my phone. “What’s your number?”
Cole told me and I typed it in. I sent him a BBM and heard a jingle in his bag. “Now you have my number too,” I said. “Text me or call whenever.”
We raised our drinks and touched them together in a toast.
“How’re you doing with classes and everything?” Cole asked, biting into a sugar cookie.
My D+ flashed in front of my eyes. I’d kept the paper hidden at the bottom of my bag all day. I hadn’t been able to bring myself to read the comments.
“I thought I was doing okay,” I said. “But I got a D+ on history homework today. It shook my confidence a little. Well, a lot.”
“If it helps, I got an F on my first English assignment at Canterwood,” Cole said. “It was homework, too. I managed to get my grade back up and finish with an A-.”
“That does help. It really scared me. I haven’t told anyone, either. I usually tell Khloe everything, but I feel like she was kind of expecting this to happen.”
Cole scrunched his nose. “What you mean? That doesn’t seem like Khloe.”
“Not like she thought I was a bad student,” I said quickly. “More like she and Lex have been saying I’m taking too many advanced classes. I didn’t want to tell them about the grade and prove their point. Like you said, it’s homework, and I can pull it up.”
“I’m sure you can do it,” Cole said, pushing the cookie plate toward me. “I know Lex very well, and she wouldn’t say any of that if it wasn’t coming from a good place.”
“It totally was,” I said. “I’ve been keeping long study hours, but it’s just until I get used to the workload here.”
“As long as you’re not overwhelmed, then go for it. It’s definitely not hurting your riding!”
I grinned. “Today was all Whisper. You and Valentino weren’t exactly slackers, either.”
Cole smiled, taking a sip of coffee. Mr. Conner had upped the difficulty of today’s lesson and had worked our class through several exercises that had left my arms and legs burning. He’d verbally quizzed us at the end on material we were supposed to have read the night before in our horse owner’s handbook. Luckily, the one question I didn’t know had gone to Drew, who’d known the answer.
“What did you just think of . . . ?” Cole asked, pulling me out of my memory. “You just got the biggest grin on your face.”
“No!” I said. “I . . . was just . . .”
“Ohhh, look out. You’re turning pink. That’s the color your skin turns when you’re not thinking about anything?”
I tossed a wadded-up straw wrapper at him. “Oh, geez. Okay, okay!” I laughed. “I thought about our lesson and then . . .”
Cole’s light brown eyebrows raised. “And then . . . ?”
“I thought about Drew. I think he likes me. Or, I think I like him. I don’t know!”
Cole put both palms on the table. “You and Drew? You guys would be the cutest couple! LT! You like him—you know you do.”
“It’s so complicated! I just got out of a relationship before I came here. I promised myself I’d focus on riding and school. Plus, I just got that history grade. That’s not exactly a sign to spend time seeing if there’s a
nything between Drew and me.”
“One thing at a time. Are you over the first guy?”
Taylor’s face popped into my head. “Yes,” I said. “I still like him as a friend, though.”
“Sounds like it couldn’t have been a better breakup. Now, yes, you got a bad grade and you want to focus on academics and riding. But you can’t stop your feelings. If you don’t let yourself explore this thing with Drew, are you going to be able to shut him out completely? Or will you spend as much time thinking about him as if you actually felt things out?”
Cole’s question made me pause. Really pause. Cole ate another cookie while everything he said spun around in my brain.
“As much as I tell myself to focus on stuff other than Drew, I can’t,” I said. “I keep wondering if he likes me like I think he does, seeing if he’s into anyone else. I think you’re right—I can give this maybe-we-like-each-other thing a try. It doesn’t mean my grades will sink or that it’ll hurt my riding.”
“Something you’re not saying is that giving Drew a shot might actually make you happy,” Cole said. He tilted his head. “That’s important, too. Grades and riding are up there—I get it. But so is having fun. Drew is a good person. We’re not best friends, but he’s always been nice to me and I’ve never seen him act like a jerk.”
I rolled my shoulders. “I just don’t want to fail here. At anything.”
“You’re so aware of that,” Cole said. “Unless you stop turning in work and start skipping riding lessons, I really think you’re going to be fine. Plus, Drew has classes just like you. And he’s a rider. And he’s cute. Pretty perfect, I think.”
I smiled. “I had gym with him today. Coach Warren let us do whatever we wanted outside. Drew and I met on the track and ran laps during the period.”
Cole smiled, a dimple showing in his right cheek. “And?”
“It was fun. He’s competitive, like I am. We pushed each other and were so out of breath we were barely able to talk. He asked me a lot of questions.”
“I’ve seen you around him at lessons,” Cole said. “You’re a smart girl. You already know that he likes you.”
I drained my tea. “Please! I barely know him. How do I know Drew’s not like that with everyone?”
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