"Victoria, please," he began to say. He reached across and tried to touch her arm but she took the reins of the horse and tugged on them, moving her mount a few feet away from him.
Cole started to move his horse over toward her. He saw her eyes widen and then she seized the reins of her mount tight in both hands. With one final glance at Cole she dug her heels into the sides of the horse and started to race away along the track. Cole turned and saw Victoria guide the horse onto the fork in the trail that would take her back to town. For a moment he was overtaken by the impulse to race after her, to catch her, seize the reins, take control, try and persuade her that what he'd said was true. That she couldn't deny she felt the same about him.
But, as he watched her disappear along the trail, leaving behind her a cloud of dust, he knew that the wisest thing to do was to rein his own foolish impulses in, regain his self control and persuade himself that in declaring his intentions to Victoria Carr, he'd just made the biggest mistake of his life.
CHAPTER TWELVE
The wind loosened Victoria's hair as she raced down the trail, hanging tight onto the reins, leaning forward on the horse, her face almost pressed against the animal's head. She held on tight. It was important she put distance between her and Cole.
She'd looked back a few times in the minutes that had passed since racing away from him, a tumbling whirl of emotions raging through her body. But there had been no sign that he was coming after her. That made her feel a temporary relief, although there was also a small part of her that was disappointed that he hadn't come chasing after her to try again to make his feelings clear.
What had he said? That she was his, that he would never let her go? What did he mean? Was it some kind of proposal?
All she had known was that the impulse to run had been overwhelming. It had been a physical force inside her which had driven her to seize the reins of her horse and get away from Cole as fast as she could. At first the relief had been palpable. The farther down the trail she had gone the calmer she had become. Until eventually her mind had begun to clear, and she could reflect on what he could have meant.
It was undeniable that the time they'd spent together in the cabin and by the riverside had been special. It had awakened something that had lain dormant inside Victoria. Something she'd thought she'd buried for good by throwing herself into her life as a matchmaker. By forcing herself to only think of others she had succeeded in forgetting about herself.
Or so she had believed.
Until today.
But the feelings she'd uncovered had been real and, in some way, surprising. They had been the same feelings she'd had for Cole all those years ago. When she believed she had been younger and more foolish. Fearing that foolishness and what she thought it would bring her in the future she had left Cole, seeking something that give her more control over her life. And to some extent she had succeeded. But it had left a hollow feeling inside her that she had tried hard to bury.
She had thought she wanted to prosper and achieve a life on her own, even if it meant living without love. And she had filled that gap in her own life by arranging for others to have love in their lives. But in doing so she had neglected herself. Neglected her own needs.
And now she had come back to Cole to find him waiting for her, displaying a patience and restraint for which she had only the deepest respect. He had been so kind to her, had treated her like a princess. He had been caring and sensitive. But when the moment had come for him to open his heart to her, he had seized his chance and she had simply and unforgivably ran from him.
Victoria lifted her head up and slowed the horse down. There was no need for haste. He wasn't coming after her. Not after what she'd done. Not after the brutal way she'd responded to Cole's opening of his heart.
She sighed and tried to fathom the importance of what she had just done.
Victoria knew that when Cole had offered his heart to her she had simply thrown it back at him in the most unkind way imaginable.
She felt a pain inside her that was both new and very old. It was the same pain she'd felt when she'd left him once before. Now, though the hurt seemed so much more intense, a tight, hard ball of acute pain that burned inside her.
What had she done? How could she have been so harsh and brutal to a man who seemed only interested in making her happy, ensuring that she had joy in her life?
In a brief and sharply painful moment she suddenly thought that she had finally lost Cole forever. He would never be hers, never share his life with again, refuse to offer her his heart, his love, his soul, as he had done today.
Victoria rode on. What was she to do? How could she possibly fix this? How could she try and get Cole back, make him realize that she did indeed want him, that he was important to her, and that there might just be some hope they would have a future together.
She rode for while letting her mind roam, allowing her thoughts to drift to the events of these last days. After a while, ideas started to come to her, the images of people she'd spoken to, the needs of others. Then, piece by piece a solution started to come to her. It came to her in the same way that she saw answers to the myriad questions involved in her matchmaking activities.
Up ahead she saw the town and she spurred the horse on, needing to get to the town, desperate to talk to the one person she knew would be able to help her. What an irony that, after all the time she'd spent on her own helping others find love, when it came to securing love for herself she would have to turn to the another person she'd turned her back on in a futile search for an entirely illusory independence.
Her mother.
A short while later Victoria pulled up in front of her mother's home. She dismounted and tied the horse up and started toward the front door. She saw an empty carriage by the picket fence. Wondering who it might belong to, she ran to the front door and burst into the hallway.
"Mama. I'm home. I need to speak with you..." she shouted, racing toward the parlor. She slowed when she heard another authoritative and very familiar voice.
Victoria stepped into the parlor to find Lucinda Carr seated in her preferred high backed chair by the fireplace. On the divan across from her mother was seated Rose Edwards.
"Victoria," Lucinda said stretching out a hand toward her daughter. "How nice to see you. And what a coincidence. Rose and I were just talking about you," she said.
Victoria stepped gingerly into the parlor. "You were?" she asked glancing over at the smiling figure of Rose, who had a cup and saucer in her lap. Obviously afternoon tea was in full session. Victoria tried to mask the concern which had probably appeared on her face. What was Rose doing here?
"Have a seat, my dear. Where have you been? We've been wondering where on earth you got to. Haven't we, Rose?"
"Indeed we have. There's so much to tell you about. We can't wait. Have a seat next to me, dear. We must have a talk."
Victoria made her way around the divan and sat hesitantly down next to Rose. The older woman locked her gaze on Victoria. Her face positively beamed, almost as if she'd just received good news.
"Do you want some tea, Victoria," her mother asked. "You look like you've been exerting yourself."
Victoria raised a hand to her face and felt the sweat beading her brow.
"No thank you, mama. I'm fine," Victoria answered.
The race back to town had been more physically demanding than she'd realized. She was slightly out of breath which only added to the feelings of consternation at finding Rose Edwards visiting with her mother. Victoria had hoped to get a chance to discuss her plans with her mother. But the presence of Rose would make that difficult, especially since what Victoria had to discuss with Lucinda was the subject of Rose's son, Paul.
"Now, Victoria. Although this isn't a full meeting of all the members of our Ladies Society, your mother and I felt it necessary to come together in an informal capacity to discuss the very pressing subject of the marriage of Lucy Carter."
Victoria felt her eyes widen in surp
rise. "Really? Why would you do that?"
"I know you've been involved in trying to resolve the issue of who Lucy should marry. And I'm sure you've been working very hard. Isn't that right, Lucinda," Rose said turning to Victoria's mother.
"One thing I know about my daughter is that she is very thorough, when it comes to keeping her promises. Especially to someone like Lucy," she said.
"Well. I'd imagine that with a father like Lucius in the picture, it can't have been easy resolving what appears to be a rather complicated situation."
"That's putting mildly," Victoria exclaimed. "Lucius seems determined to have his way in this entire matter. He seems to think that he knows best when it come to choosing a husband for Lucy," she said.
An image of Cole flashed into Victoria's mind and she had to seize control of herself lest Rose see how the subject of Lucius Carter's selection of a husband for his daughter was affecting her.
Rose smiled, seemingly unaware of the roiling emotions inside the young woman seated next to her. The woman seemed almost completely unconcerned about the situation. The way she'd addressed the subject of the union of Lucy with either Cole or Paul almost suggested that there was absolutely nothing for anyone to worry about.
"Lucius is a rather difficult individual," Rose continued. "I know that my husband, in his position as banker in this town, has had to be quite firm with Lucius on at least a few occasions."
Victoria frowned. "In what way?" she asked.
Rose waved a dismissive hand. "Nothing that my dear husband couldn't bring to a satisfactory conclusion. In spite of Lucius and his famous temper," she said. "And after today, I think Lucius know exactly where we all stand."
Victoria frowned and glanced across at her mother who simply smiled back at her daughter. There was a knowing glint in the eyes of her mother that Victoria had seen on many occasions. It usually meant that there was something secret and pleasing about to be revealed. Victoria could remember seeing that same look on her mother's face before many a past Christmas and birthday.
"What happened today?" Victoria asked looking at Rose.
The other woman lifted the cup of tea to her lips and took a slow sip. She placed the cup back down on the saucer. The sound of china clinking on china seemed suddenly harsh and intrusive in the heavy silence of the parlor.
"Paul's mother and father had a little meeting today. With Lucius Carter," Victoria's mother started to explain.
Rose interrupted with a slight nod toward Lucinda. "It seemed to my husband and I that the time had come for us to have a little chat with Lucius. So we invited him over to the bank this afternoon and, eventually, after what appeared to me to be an obstinate delay on his part, Lucius consented to appear at the bank."
Victoria felt her brows furrow and she looked over toward her mother, seeking some kind of assurance that what she was being told by Rose was, in fact, good news. Although right at this moment, even if she was about to be given good news, it felt to Victoria as if butterflies had taken up residence inside her stomach.
"What did you discuss with Lucius?" Victoria asked quietly, trying to restrain the urge to demand an immediate answer.
Rose smiled. "I'm not at liberty to divulge the details. All I can say is that after a few things were explained to him, he finally came round to see our point of view," she said.
"Point of view about what?" Victoria asked.
"About just who would make the ideal husband for Lucy Carter," Rose said.
Victoria stiffened and leaned back. Her throat had tightened and she was sure that the color had drained from her face. Rose leaned over toward Victoria and placed a hand on her arm. "Oh, don't be concerned Victoria. Lucius saw sense, and after I suppose an inevitable few minutes of getting used to the idea, he finally consented."
"Consented? To what?" Victoria exclaimed her voice rising suddenly.
Victoria spun her head and stared, wide eyed at her mother. "What did Lucius consent to, mother?"
Her mother's mouth opened but was halted by a loud knock on the front door.
Rose stood and went to the window. She glanced around the edge of the curtains. "That's them. They're here," she said turning. Rose's satisfied grin stretched across her face.
Lucinda stood and started to make her way toward the hallway.
"Who is it, mother," Victoria demanded.
Lucinda paused at the parlor door, her hands clasped and her face filled with a contented smile.
"Why, it's Lucy Carter and Paul Edwards. Of course."
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
What was happening to Victoria? That was the thought that whirled around inside Cole's mind as he slowly made his way along the trail back to the ranch. He had no interest in the landscape around him. He had no mind to even think about the work he'd have to do when he finally made it back to the ranch.
All he could think about was Victoria, and what was going through her mind. How she was feeling. What she was going to do.
When he'd opened his mouth and let the words out that had been burning up inside him, within seconds of seeing her reaction he knew he'd made a mistake. The pain he'd seen on her face had caused a raging fire inside him that had tormented him the entire time since she'd raced off.
Maybe it had been just as well he hadn't gone off in pursuit. He wouldn't have trusted himself to say or do the right thing. Not when he'd made such a mess of declaring his true feelings to her.
And they had indeed been his true feelings. Hadn't they? Hadn't he meant every word he'd said? He was absolutely serious about wanting Victoria; he was completely committed to winning her back; his single desire was to ensure her happiness, and in his view that could only be achieved if she spent the rest of her life by Cole's side.
It was a simple as that.
But, boy, had he messed up. What was it about men? How come they were so useless at making their heartfelt feelings known to the woman they loved?
Because that was the plain truth, wasn't it?
Cole MacAllan loved Victoria Carr.
He truly did.
And what was cutting him up so much was that he could see that she had feelings for him. Maybe the same feelings they'd once shared, all those years ago. But even if those feelings weren't as true or as real as they'd once been, Cole was sure that Victoria felt something for him. Still.
He'd seen it in the cabin and he'd seen it even more today, at the river.
But he could understand why she'd run off like that. The situation with Lucy and her father was just too complicated. As much as Cole was determined that Lucius wasn't going to have his way, there was only so much that Cole could do. If Lucius was so determined that Lucy and Cole should wed, then that was a whole lot of pressure even the strongest man in this territory would struggle to resist. Lucius was a powerful man and he did have the ability to ruin Cole.
If he wanted to.
Lucius had a bad temper, and an even worse reputation as a hard nosed businessman. There weren't many men who could cross Lucius, let alone stand up to the man, when he really wanted something.
The thought of losing the ranch, or even the whole enterprise becoming damaged through the vengeful actions of a cattle dealer made Cole's blood race. He felt the rage of a man wronged. Lucius had no right trying to do this. Cole had never really done anything he could think of that justified the cattleman's desperate desire to make Cole a part of his family.
The very thought of that made Cole's throat tighten. He gripped the reins of the horse and drew the animal to a slow halt. He leaned on the pommel and gazed across the rolling hills. He took a deep breath and felt his jaw tighten.
Cole racked his brains and thought for a few moments, desperately seeking an answer to the questions running around inside his mind.
What was really important to him? What was the only thing that mattered to him right now? Just how far was he willing to go to win the one thing that held the key to any future happiness?
His eyes narrowed as the answers to those que
stions rose into his awareness. It had always been so simple, really. Now that he considered the whole thing with the care that it deserved, there was only one thing for him to do.
If it meant losing everything he had, but gaining the one thing that would truly make him happy, then that was a sacrifice he was completely willing to make.
No question about it.
The burning fire he felt inside, as well as the image of that one treasured and precious person, told him that the time to take action had come.
And he knew exactly what he had to do.
****
Cole drew his horse to a halt outside the front of Lucinda Carr's beautiful home. He tied the reins to the picket fence. There was a carriage standing empty near the front gate.
He glanced at the windows of the house, searching for any signs of activity. He hoped they were at home. Cole was sure that Victoria would have come straight home after leaving him on the trail.
When he opened the gate it made a noisy, creaking sound. Cole glanced down at the hinges and then up at front of the house. He saw a twitch of the curtain. Someone was at home.
He walked up the front steps and paused on the porch. His heart was pounding, and it had nothing to do with the frantic pace of the ride into town.
Cole stood straight and took a deep breath, lifted the metal door knocker and rapped it loudly. It seemed like an eternity before he could hear activity from inside. He heard voices and then the clear sound of footsteps and the rustling of material.
A dress.
Then the door opened and he saw her.
Victoria.
She stood in the hallway. Her eyes were wide and he was sure there was the faintest hint of a smile there. He'd expected her face to be tear stained, eyes reddened with distress. But there was none of that. She looked positively glad to see him. And she looked so beautiful it made Cole's heart ache.
Cole froze, momentarily unsure what to do when faced with such an unexpected welcome. Finally it was Victoria who broke the silence.
Cole's Montana Bride (Sweet,clean Western Historical Romance)(Montana Ranchers and Brides Series Book 7) Page 11
