The Witch-Herbalist of the Remote Town

by Amos Tutuola

  But I had hardly climbed this hill to one-third of its height when I saw that these wild people ran to the foot of it. They too clung to this same creeping plant and started to climb it up to the top of the hill as hastily as they could so that I might not be able to hide or run away from them. All of them, including the Crazy Removable-Headed Wild Man and the Abnormal Squatting Man of the Jungle, were dangling heavily to the left and right, and all were coming to the top of the hill. I put on more speed so that I might climb to the top before they could even climb a half of it, although it was at this moment that I observed this wonderful hill was exceedingly high. Its height was more than one kilometre and its circumference was about one-quarter of a kilometre and it was so wet that very cold water was dropping down to its foot from all over its body. But its top spread to one acre of land. It was full of bush, big trees and crevices of rock up there.

  Luckily I had climbed this wonderful hill to the top when these wild men had climbed it to three-quarters of its height. But I had hardly climbed it to the top when I began to run here and there just to find a safe place in which to hide myself before they would climb it to the top. Unfortunately, I could not find such a safe place to hide, and I saw that they had nearly climbed it to the top. Having failed to find a place in which to hide because there was not sufficient time for me, I hastily went back to the extreme edge of the top of the hill. I sternly stood at the spot where there was the tap root of the creeping plant. But as soon as I lifted up my matchet to cut the root so that these wild men might fall down into the ditches which were at the foot of the hill, it came to my “memory” at this time that without the creeping plant, I would not be able to descend from the top to the foot of the hill. So I lowered my matchet with fear. Then I ran back to the crevices of the rock and again I began to find a safe place to hide.

  As I continued to find a safe place to hide myself and I could not yet find it, it was so I was thinking in my “memory” of what to do to save myself from these savage wild people. So it came to my “memory” again at this moment that unless I fought with them bravely and with all my power they would overcome me. But as soon as this plan came to my “memory”, the wild people climbed the hill to the top. They had hardly climbed it to the top when they scattered to different places. Each began to hunt for me, as he had become now as wild as a wounded tiger. Having seen this their terrible action, I hastily put my bag of food and bag of juju down near a small rock and I hid the “removable head” under it. After, I put my bow and poisoned arrows on my shoulder in readiness, for perhaps I would need them unexpectedly. Then I held my heavy matchet tightly, and I ran to the one who was near me. I struck him on the forehead with my heavy matchet and he fell down and fainted at the same time. But as soon as I exposed myself to another one, and as this one was just preparing to jump on me, I dashed on him first. Then both of us started to wrestle. But within a few twinklings, I raised the whole of him off the ground and then I threw him into one of the ditches which were at the foot of the hill. And again, I pushed the first one who had fainted into one of the ditches as well.

  As I began to jump here and there like a tiger, and with my eyes which began to flash fire at this moment, another two of them saw me and they rushed against me. But they could not do anything for me when I hastily put my matchet down, and then I held both of them. I twisted them together and then I pushed them into the ditches. But I had hardly conquered those two when the Crazy Removable-Headed Wild Man saw me. And as soon as he saw me, he began to turn round swiftly and was coming to me with the head of a rhinoceros on his neck at this time. But as he was still turning round swiftly and coming to me, I hastily picked up my matchet from the ground and then I ran to him. When the two of us met, he began to push me toward the edge of the top of the hill, with the hope of pushing me into one of the ditches. But as soon as he had pushed me near the edge with his belly, with all my power, I struck the head of the rhinoceros which was on his neck with my matchet. The head had hardly sprang away from his neck when I ran to it and picked it up with the left hand.

  But the Crazy Removable-Headed Wild Man could not do anything to me or turn round now. He simply stood powerlessly on the same spot. And I had hardly picked up the head when the Abnormal Squatting Man of the Jungle saw me. But as soon as he shouted horribly on me, the rest who were still searching for me in the debris rushed out to him. But when they saw the head in my hand, every one of them hastily bent down to pick up a stone with which to throw at me to death at once. Having understood what they wanted to do, I hastily took my bow and poisoned arrows from my shoulder. I had hardly set it in action when I shot at the heavy swelled-out stomach of the Abnormal Squatting Man of the Jungle.

  So as soon as his stomach exploded, the extreme cold air of the stomach rushed high up into the sky and to everywhere in that jungle. But when his stomach had exploded, the rest were so fearful that they did not know what to do again. But as soon as the sky had become cloudy and everything began to shiver heavily with the cold, and the rest began to shiver with the cold as the Abnormal Squatting Man continued to lament horribly for pain, I pushed the rest into the ditches unexpectedly. I did this successfully because they were confused and they could not see well at this time for the extreme cold had clouded the sky and this wild jungle as well. But as soon as I had conquered these wild people, I ran to the spot on which I hid my loads and the “removable heads”. Then having hung all my loads on my shoulders and held the two heads and my matchet, I clung to the same creeping plant and then I descended by the help of it.

  But I had hardly come to the foot of this wonderful hill when I began to run along eastward in this jungle, as I was still shivering from feet to head with the cold of the stomach of this Abnormal Squatting Man of the Jungle who was still lamenting loudly in one of the two ditches with great pain.

  I had hardly travelled one kilometre in this quiet jungle when I was forced to stop by the extreme cold. Then I hastily made a big fire. Having warmed my body for a few twinklings, I continued my journey at once without eating anything.

  When I had travelled in this quiet jungle for about two hundred and twenty-four twinklings with much hardship, luckily, I came to a land, the climate of which was not tampered with by the cold of the stomach of the Abnormal Squatting Man of the Jungle. And there were plenty of edible things, such as yams, bananas, beans, garden eggs, pepper of all kinds, etc.

  Then with happiness, I stopped. I put all my belongings under one big tree. As I still held the two heads with my left hand and my matchet with the right hand, I removed two big yams from the mounds with the matchet. Although I reluctantly removed the two yams, for I noticed well that the land belonged to the townspeople and not the wild people, but hunger forced me to do this. Then with the two yams, I returned to the spot on which I put the rest of my belongings. Having put the yams down, I pegged the two “removable heads” on the ground and then I made a big fire at a little distance from that spot. I roasted the yams and I ate them to my satisfaction. Then when I had rested for sixty twinklings, I packed up all my belongings and I continued my usual journey to the north-east of this land.

  So it was like that I continued to travel on and on until night. But I stopped when the darkness did not allow me to see again. So I put my loads down and then I slept near the road till morning. As soon as I woke up and saw that nothing had happened to my property and myself, then I ate some fruits. After that I continued my journey without wasting time. But I was exceedingly happy when I travelled till midday and came to one road unexpectedly which belonged to the townspeople. So, this gave me assurance that I had not missed the right way to the Remote Town of the Witch-Herbalist and that I had more strength to travel faster than ever.

  The Stalwart Gateman

  and his Devil

  When I had travelled faster and with great happiness for sixty twinklings, I began to hear the cocks crowing repeatedly from a distance which was not more than a half-kilometre. So this made me sure that I was near a bi
g town which belonged to the townspeople. Then I continued my journey on this road as fast as I could in that direction.

  But I wondered at last that, as I was travelling along on this road with happiness, my first “mind” and second “mind” which were my partners and advisers and which had deserted me since when I was in troubles with the offensive wild people, etc., began to congratulate me now for conquering the wild people, etc. But I hastily quarrelled with them for failing to advise me at the time that I was in difficulties. But as they wanted to apologize for their desertion, my “memory” hastily recorded it down as an offence for which they would be punished along with many others which they had already committed and which they were also going to commit again. However, at the same time, my second “mind” hinted me that I was going to meet a cruel stalwart gatekeeper on that road. It hinted me further that if I could fight him boldly, I would conquer him. “Though you may conquer him, his friend, the devil-worshipper like himself, will chase you to a shrine-field and there you will conquer that one as well!” Thus my second “mind” hinted me.

  But I feared greatly when my second “mind” foretold me so, because it was not deceiving me at all, even though it might desert me sometimes when I was in danger.

  However, as I continued to travel along, it was the fifth hour in the evening before I came to a townsgate unexpectedly, as my second “mind” had foretold me. Then I stopped at this gate immediately I came there, for there was nobody who was allowed to pass through the gate to the town without paying the gate-fee to the gateman first. So I had hardly stopped at the gate when the gateman rushed to the outside from his booth. But he was greatly sulky when he saw the two “removable heads” in my left hand and also my dreadful appearance, which was by this time too gruesome to the sight of a human. As he walked wildly to the gate, he hastily held up his long sword. But when I understood that he wanted to cut me to death with the long sword, I hastily ran back to a short distance from him just to avoid his sword.

  Then as I stood wildly on one spot, I began to look at him sternly, and he too did the same thing. Now both of us fastened eyes at each other very sulkily and wildly and without talking to each other for about ten twinklings. So it was at this time I noticed his appearance which was too terrible to see. Indeed, he was the right cruel stalwart man that was chosen to keep watch on the gate, because he had no mercy at all. He was very strenuous in a strange way and he was bold enough to keep watch of such a stronghold as this townsgate. As he stood firmly on the ground he seemed like a stump of a tree. Each of his two arms was long and thick, many very thick veins were sprung out from every part of his body like the roots of a tree. He looked at every living creature as though that was nothing for him. There was no happiness on his face at all both in the day and night.

  Then after about ten twinklings that we had been looking at each other, my eyes went unexpectedly to his booth, and there I saw one full figure or image of the devil which stood in front of the booth. The blood and oil which were pouring on it were dropping down and were full upon the ground as well. This image of the devil was hard mud. It was very horrible to see, and one small rock was in front of the image. This small rock was also wet with the blood and oil. So this showed me that this cruel gateman was a devil-worshipper.

  But as we were still looking sternly at each other, he asked from me with a huge voice from where I was coming and where I was going to. I explained to him, as I still fastened my wild eyes on him, that I had left my town several years ago in order to find the way to the Remote Town; that instead, I had been in punishments of the wild people of the wild jungles since, until I had become a real straggler in the jungles, etc. which belonged to those merciless wild people who did not want to see the townsman but to punish him to death.

  Again, this devil-worshipper, the gateman, asked me with another kind of a terrible shout what I was going to do in the Remote Town. But I explained to him wildly that I was going to the Witch-Mother, to beg her to make the juju-soup for me which would make my barren wife become pregnant. Having heard this from me, he raised his heavy head up and down heavily several times, and then he asked how I managed to get the two “removable heads” which were on top of the two short sticks that I held upright before him. But I told him proudly that I had fought fearlessly on different occasions with the Crazy Removable-Headed Wild Man of the Jungle, and that when I conquered him I snatched the heads from his neck and ran away for my life.

  As soon as this gateman heard the story of how I came about the two heads, he shrank up with fear and wondered at the same time. After he had kept silence for some twinklings, he asked me again as he began to twinkle his large swelled-out eyes: “You were so bold, brave, strong and had such a powerful juju—all of which helped you to conquer the Crazy Removable-Headed Wild Man, and then you took two of his ‘removable heads’ from him! The Crazy Removable-Headed Wild Man of the wild jungle, who is so powerful that there is not any of the other ‘wild men’ of the wild jungles who could even go near! Ha! You are a wild man indeed, who people must respect! All right, put the heads in one of your bags and then come nearer to me!”

  But after this strong and merciless gateman wondered greatly like that, willing or not, he became low-tempered and now he prepared to treat me with deceitful mercy. Then as soon as I saw that he had put his long sword on the ground, I took the heads away from the tops of the sticks and then I went near him with bravery.

  I was now greatly confused, I did not understand whether it was my fearful appearance or the two “removable heads” that were fearful to every wild man or townsman that I met or met me, for whenever I met one or more wild men in the wild jungles they wanted to kill me and then take the heads away. But this time that I met the gateman, who was a townsman, he too wanted to kill me after he had forced me to hide them. So this was too strange to decide within myself correctly. I did not understand yet whether these heads were dangerous, harmful, helpful, etc., I was simply carrying them about with pride and if possible to carry them back to my town as trophies of my adventures.

  Very soon, my first “mind” hastily told me that the heads were good and that they would help me in the near future if I could keep them safe. But again, the second “mind” hastily explained to me further that although the heads would be useful in future, the more I hid them the more dangers would come upon my head and the more I would miss the right road to the town of the Witch-Herbalist as well. Now, without reluctance, I strongly believed both my “minds” who were my partners in my journey.

  Now as I went near this gateman, he asked for the gate-fee which was four copper coins, without paying which, I would not be allowed to pass to the Roadside Town. But I confessed to him at the same time that I had not even a single copper coin in hand at that time, because it was quite a long time since I had left my town. Having heard so from me, he paused for a while and then he told me to wait at the gate till daybreak. He told me further that he would think well in the midnight whether he would allow me to pass through the gate without paying the fee, because it meant death to him if some time he allowed one to pass free of charge.

  So willing or not, I put all my loads down near the gate and I lay down. But before I fell asleep at this gate, I first asked from my partners, who were my first “mind” and second “mind” for about one hundred and twenty twinklings, what to do if the gateman refused me to pass through the gate, or if perhaps he insisted in the morning that he would not allow me to pass until I paid the gate-fee. But as I asked like that from my “minds”, after a while, my first “mind” advised me that as I had no money, it meant I must fight him fiercely before I could be able to pass. And again, my second “mind” added that unless I fought this gateman fiercely and with all my power and juju, I could not conquer him, and otherwise I would lose my life at the gate. My second “mind” explained further that even if I conquered him, his strong friend, who was a devil-worshipper like himself, would still follow me on the road to revenge on me. Therefore, I must ge
t myself ready to face two fierce fights.

  But when both my “minds” told me like that, I was so much afraid that my heart began to throb at the same time. Of course, as soon as my second “mind” reminded me of one juju which had the power to destroy such as this stalwart cruel gateman who was also a despot, my heart stopped throbbing. So I slept within a few sixtieths of a twinkling. But it was hardly sixty twinklings that I was enjoying the sleep, when my second “mind” woke me suddenly. Then it reminded me again that, although I had the juju which had the power to destroy such a merciless despot as this gatekeeper, he had a detrimental strange image of the devil which was moulded with strong and fine mud. This image of the devil had the power of attacking and avenging when one wanted to overpower its worshipper, the gateman or gatekeeper. But I could not sleep again for fear when I heard this from my second “mind”. And I was still in fear when my first “mind” hastily encouraged me. It said that I should not mind the second “mind”, but if I could fight fiercely with my juju and with all my power, I would certainly conquer the gateman, the despot.

  Having heard so from my first “mind”, although it was misleading me sometimes, my heart became at rest and then I fell asleep again within a few twinklings. So I enjoyed the sleep till daybreak, and I was woken suddenly by the terrible shout of the gateman. And as I raised up my head with fear, I saw that people of the Roadside Town had started to pass through the gate to their farms and to the town, and so some of them were passing through the gate to their daily errands.