by Nancy Hopper
Several days after her arrival, Tasha felt rested enough to leave her room. She gathered the children, and went out to the great room. Her father was sitting in a recliner, reading the paper and smoking a pipe.
“Well then, let me see this pretty little girl.” Brent said evenly, sitting forward and looking at Naomi with a clear invitation in his eyes.
Naomi looked suspiciously up at her grandfather. Then, she swiveled her eyes to look questioningly at her mother.
There was no dramatic response, so slowly Naomi smiled her sweet, shy little smile. Being a pastor's daughter, she was well used to meeting new people, and having them want to hold her and play with her.
After studying him for a moment, Naomi went willingly into his arms. He looked like a nice enough man. Kind of steady, and firm. He had those blue, unwavering eyes that seemed to say that he knew everything in the world that there was to know. For years afterward, Naomi would swear to the world that he did.
From then on, life was quite different for all of them. Tasha picked up her old lifestyle to some degree, although she never quite entered the social scene the way she once had. It was familiar and comfortable enough to keep her at ease, yet different enough from the life she’d been leading, to be good for her.
She didn’t hear from many of her old friends, save weekly letters from Delanie and Marietta. After a while, even those tapered off.
She kept to her father’s house, and played with the children. She acted as hostess when her father entertained, and played the part he needed her to play. But she wasn’t interested in the men, and they simply couldn’t understand it. How could a woman like Tasha not want to get married?
She didn’t. The very idea was distasteful. She knew there would never be another Gary, and she didn’t want anything or anyone less. So, she filled her time with her children.
Nothing eased the pain and loneliness, and she had to simply deny her heart and fleshly demands for her man. He was gone forever, and she knew she’d have no other. But she was heartsick most of the time, and so lonely. She knew she was still simply surviving, but it would have to do. She’d had her Shangri-la, and she knew it couldn’t happen again.
She was oddly content after a time, with the children and her routine. It was sane, dependable and safe. There was no point in wishing for more; and thus, she was never disappointed. There was nothing left in this world that could improve her life, with Gary gone.
She had two wonderful children to raise, and she went on and did it – for both of them. And Brent helped, immeasurably. He was a very different man than the spoiled playboy he’d once been. He was a strong, steady, male authority figure in their lives. A fine one, who never had feminine visitors.
They traveled quite a bit, for something to do, that first year. Brent still had his fingers in many businesses, but he had capable managers and could pretty much do whatever he wished with his time.
They toured Europe, and Russia. Another trip through China and Japan; then, Australia and New Zealand. South America was their last great adventure. It was a time that they would both always treasure, for they managed to recapture a good measure of the father-daughter rapport they'd once enjoyed.
Brent was so grateful for Tasha's forgiveness, and her willingness to be his daughter again! And, he dearly loved his grandchildren. The three of them filled a place in his heart that had been empty for a very long time.
The following year, however, Brent opened a new business, and was suddenly much busier building a foundation for the new venture. Tasha found herself alone much more often, and quite bored.
Finally, she decided to go back to college and finish her four year degree. It was mostly boredom that made her do it, but just the same, she felt it was worthwhile to do. She had to do something with her life and her time.
She found that she was very creative, and learned a good many crafts in those years – oil painting, stained glass, sewing, jewelry making, gardening. She wasn't deliriously happy, but she was making an effort to move on.
Brent had a house at a Salt Lake ski resort in Utah, and they spent a good part of each year there. With her father away a great deal, Tasha stayed there and skied throughout the winter season.
Skiing was the most exhilarating thing she’d done, for so long! She felt alive again, gliding over the snow at high speeds, feeling the wind in her hair, the bite of the cold on her cheeks.
Her third year at home, she began to ski heavily, feeling a restlessness that she hadn’t experienced before. She skied alone often, for she didn’t allow many friends.
She slowly and carefully made friends at the resort, though, and soon had a bevy of ski patrols and regulars who made it their business to know her well. But, she didn't date anyone. She still couldn't even fathom the idea.
Pastors Marshall and Brooks tried to contact her once in awhile, but she didn’t return their calls. She didn’t want to try to continue the old days. She had been terribly grateful for their help and support in her time of need; but they represented Gary, and her life with him. She felt an almost overwhelming need to cut that off, and leave it behind her, in order to survive.
That included all the people: Deborah, the Waldens, Joe and Delanie, everyone from both churches. Hearing from them only opened old wounds, and reminded her of the life and love she could no longer have. So, she was polite; but not terribly responsive when they tried to reach her. She knew there was no way to explain how she felt. She always responded with a handwritten note, expressing her thanks and appreciation for their care.
One bright, sunny January day, she rode the quad chair lift on the Southern exposure of the mountain with a group of three men who said they were from Wyoming, and usually skied Jackson Hole.
“Why the change?” she asked, with little interest. “On vacation?”
“Yeah, kind of.” one of them replied. “We’re here for a conference.”
“Oh, really?” she responded politely. “What kind of conference?”
The men all smiled. “A Christian conference.” one of them replied. “Of the Charismatic variety.”
That made her heart lurch. “I see. Well, have a nice time.” she answered woodenly, and busied herself preparing to get off the lift, although they'd just begun the ride. Her face suddenly looked like stone carved from the side of the mountain.
"So, do you know Jesus?" one of the men asked her with keen interest.
"Yes. We are acquainted, thank you." She answered coldly.
All three men looked astonished, at her reply. How could she know Jesus, yet be so cold about Him?
“What about the Holy Ghost? Have you received Him?”
Tasha just busied herself with her gloves.
The man sitting next to Tasha looked down at her with kind eyes. Keen eyes that were clear and bright blue, and filled with compassion.
"Please forgive my friend; he didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. The Evangelist in him rises to the surface without much provocation." He said with a boyish smile.
Tasha glanced up at him. His even teeth, clear blue eyes, strong cheekbones and black mustache made him very handsome. He had dark hair spilling over his collar. She smiled at him in a way that she hoped would let him know that she wasn't offended; but that he wasn't going to get anywhere with her, either. They were obviously playing ‘good cop, bad cop’.
"No problem. I'm used to it." She answered evenly. Then she turned her eyes to the mountain tops, and studiously ignored them all.
Nothing more was said to Tasha until they got to the top of the mountain. The three men talked quietly among themselves, but Tasha did not engage them again. When the lift got to the summit, she hurriedly jumped off the chair and slid a long way before she stopped to put on her poles and adjust her gear. Then, she quickly skied away.
The three men watched her curiously, and then looked at one another.
“That was interesting.” one said with a chuckle.
“You’d almost think she didn’t want to discus
s the Holy Ghost.” another teased innocently.
“Naw.” said the third. “Must have been your imagination.” he said facetiously. His keen blue eyes watched Tasha long after, expertly skiing her way down the hill.
Tasha didn’t give the men another thought. She skied her afternoon away, and then stopped in the lounge for a hot cocoa spiked with Peppermint Schnapps.
A man joined her at her table without invitation, and sat looking at her with penetrating blue eyes. “Hello again. I just stopped by to apologize to you. I hope we didn’t offend you, today.” he said seriously.
“Offend me? No, I don’t think so. I don’t even know you.” she answered evenly.
“My two friends and I rode the lift with you to the summit today.”
“Oh?” she said, blankly.
He chuckled, and smiled crookedly at her. “You don’t even remember, do you?”
“I’m sorry. I really don’t.” she admitted coolly.
“We were telling you about the conference we came here for. We’re from Jackson Hole, Wyoming.”
“Oh. Yes, I do remember that.” she said, looking a little uncomfortable.
“I can see that you do. I wonder why you look that way?”
“What way?” she hedged, turning her face as if to ward off a blow.
He laughed at her gently. “As if you are very cautious ... maybe even afraid of the Holy Ghost, or any mention of Him? Much less the terror that the name of Jesus obviously strikes in your heart.”
She stared at him blankly. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about.” she snapped.
He laughed at her, and looked into her eyes. “You don’t, huh? Maybe then, it’s time you learned. Why don’t you come and see what it’s all about? Tonight at seven, in the Ballroom at the Cedars.”
“The Cedars?” she asked suspiciously. “The Cedars is one of the spendiest places in town!”
“Yeah. He likes it that way. He has very good taste.” the man teased.
“I’m afraid I’m really not interested.” Tasha answered bluntly.
“That’s too bad. I have to tell you that He’s very interested in you.” the man said persuasively.
Tasha paused. She looked up into his very clear, piercing blue eyes, and wavered. She suddenly felt as if she’d been pulled into a tractor beam.
“What’s wrong? Why are you afraid of Him?” he asked very quietly.
“I’m not.” she answered quickly, her eyes flashing.
“You do know Him, don’t you?” he asked with curious conviction. "That wasn't just a put-off."
Tasha looked away. “I once thought I did.”
“So, what went wrong?” the man asked carefully.
She shrugged. “Nothing. Nothing, really. I just went a different way.”
He shook his head. “Well, He’d like it if you’d come tonight.”
“Would he, now? Him, or you?” she asked critically. Her blazing eyes pierced his boldly. There was no conceit, just refreshing candor in this lady.
The man looked into her crystal clear green eyes, and laughed. “Oh, boy. Actually, I just had a feeling that our ride up the hill today wasn’t a coincidence. He had some reason that He wanted me to speak to you. Honest, that’s all there is to this. It’s not some kind of come-on. I’m not in the market for a woman, if that's what you're thinking.”
She continued to eye him warily, and remained silent.
“Come on, now. Just because you’re alone does not mean I’m hitting on you. It’s quite obvious that you could crook your little finger, and a hundred men in this room would come running. You’re a local, and they all have made it their business to know you well. But you don’t date men, and they are all staring at me right now to see how long it will take you to knock me flat.”
Tasha looked at him critically. He was probably a couple of years over thirty. He had the sharpest, clearest, bluest eyes she’d ever seen, and dark, layered hair that fell into his eyes and over his collar. He was quite well built, yet extremely trim. He had high cheekbones and a full, drooping mustache. He had very straight, white teeth and a dazzling smile. There were matched dimples in his cheeks.
His lips were very sexy — a chiseled upper lip, and a full, sensual lower lip. His chin was firm, and had just the suggestion of a dimple. He had a powerful presence about him.
To her surprise, Tasha found herself a little off balance and breathless. No man had affected her in any way, since Gary.
“Just who have you been talking to, that you have so much information about me?” she asked coldly.
“Nobody. I don’t know anything about you except that I rode the lift with you today, and you wanted nothing more in the world than to push me off. I don’t have any reason to bug you, lady. I’m a sworn bachelor and I’m not on the prowl. I’m just in the service of Jesus. The Holy Ghost says you’re to come with me tonight. He’s never wrong. He wants me to talk to you, and you know it. Why don’t you stop being suspicious, and take me at face value?”
She didn’t respond.
He sighed tiredly. “Please say you’ll come, and mean it. I won’t bite. I won’t even nibble. I’m not looking for female companionship, I’ve got all I can handle on my plate already.”
She stared at him suspiciously. “It’s all just because God sent you over here, huh?” she asked very cautiously.
His clear eyes were burning with honesty and chagrin. “That’s right.”
She sighed, and ran a hand through her hair.
“In fact, let me take you to the conference. I have to go early, but I trust you won’t be too bored.”
“No, thank you, I have children to take care of.” she denied quickly.
“Are you married?” the man asked, sounding surprised.
“No, not anymore.” she answered quickly. She didn’t want to talk about Gary.
“I think there’s child care available.” he offered.
“Thanks, but that’s all right. I need to be with them this evening, I’ve been out all day.” she answered coolly.
“Are you skiing again tomorrow?” he asked doggedly.
“Perhaps.” she answered coldly.
“You want me to go away, don’t you?” he chuckled. “All right, I’ll go away – if you tell me your name, and let me take you to the conference tomorrow night.”
Tasha sighed tiredly. “Please understand, I’m just not interested.”
The man chuckled in a way that made her feel he didn’t believe that. He looked at her for a long moment, and decided it was time to cut to the chase. But, he had to be careful. She was the skittish kind.
“Listen; can I ski with you tomorrow?” he asked gently. “Let’s see ... Tanya? No, that’s not it. Ta ... Tasha. Right? Actually, it’s Natasha. Natasha Suzette. And none of your friends at the resort could have told me your middle name, because they don’t know it.
You hate that name so much, you didn’t even put it on your wedding announcements. The only place it’s recorded is on your birth certificate, your social security card and your school records.”
“You were named for a sister of your father’s who slapped you silly once when you were just a little girl, and you’ve refused to use the name Suzette ever since.”
The blood drained from Tasha’s face. “Who told you that?” she whispered.
The man laughed at her knowingly. “Don’t you know who tells me all I need to know?” he asked innocently. “You know darn well that none of your local wannabe’s told me anything about you, and I think you know already, I’m not the kind to ask them.”
"Now, lady, why don’t you let me take you home tonight, and I’ll pick you up at eight in the morning. We’ll ski all day, go to dinner, and then we can go to the conference. What do you say? Unless you’d rather change your mind, and go tonight. Come to think of it, tomorrow is too far away. It's got to be tonight.”
Tasha sighed, and stared wearily up into his eyes. “You don’t plan to give up any time soon, do you?”
>
He smiled at her, with something akin to pity and embarrassment in his eyes. “I can’t.” he said lightly. “He’s very insistent.”
Tasha bowed her head. What was she supposed to do? This man was interesting. He knew her name. She looked up at him almost defiantly. “All right. We’ll do it tonight and get it over with, then. Once you see that I’m not interested, will you leave me alone?”
He laughed at her. “All I have to do is get you there. The rest is up to Him.” he agreed.
“Then you can pick me up at ...”
“I’ll have to follow you home, get you ready and leave right away. I have to be at the Cedars at six-thirty.”
“Okay, let’s get going then.” she said tightly. She turned and gave him a burning look. “You may as well just leave your car here, and ride with me.”
She finished off her drink, picked up her gloves and goggles, and walked toward the stairs. The man went to consult with his friends, and joined her at the door leading outside.
He grinned at her guilelessly, and put a hand on her back as they walked. She moved quickly forward to escape his touch.
It wasn’t far to her car, as she was parked up front in preferred customer parking. She wordlessly unlocked the passenger door for him, and then climbed into the driver’s seat. Her ski boots slipped off easily and were replaced by her soft leather boots, in a flash. She stashed her ski boots behind her seat, and they were off.
Tasha was uncomfortable with this man around. She didn’t like having him so close beside her in the car. It’s like the car couldn’t hold all of him — he simply filled it to bursting, somehow, with his presence. She didn’t like the feeling of his eyes on her, watching and probing into her depths.
“What’s your last name, Tasha?” he asked, stifling a yawn.
“Don’t you know?” she asked sweetly. "I'm surprised Jesus didn't tell you that, too."
“No. No, I don’t know.” he admitted, a smile lurking.
“Charles-Taylor.” she answered blankly. She didn't want to get into a battle of wits with this man.
“Are you from Salt Lake?” he asked lightly.
