Breaking to Breathe

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Breaking to Breathe Page 15

by Lisa N. Paul


  “Hey, sexy, can I have a Blow Job?”

  “Oh, hey. Do you want the shot or the drink?” He knew he should have remembered her name, yet he couldn’t. And as much of a dick as he was, he knew calling her Sinus Infection to her face would be bad for business. Not that he’d ever cared before.

  She reached over the bar top with her fake nails, in attempts to grab his arm, the ladies always loved to touch him and he welcomed the attention, before. Just as she was about to make contact, he shifted away reaching for the ingredients to make her cocktail. “Come on, Kyle. Don’t act shy with me.” What he really wanted to do was give her some nasal spray and a tissue. “I thought we could give it another chance. We were really good together.”

  “Listen, lady,” Kyle’s patience had officially run out and the last thing he wanted was for Cate to walk in and get the wrong impression over this Vicks Vapo mess. “I know I was fucked up that night, but even I remember kicking your ass to the curb. I wasn’t interested then, and I’m even less interested now. There are two other bartenders here. Order your drinks from them.” Kyle turned away from her, and his eyes landed right on Cate.

  “Fuck.”

  Cate and Elliot made their way through the crowded bar and spotted Lyla and Janie sitting in the same corner they’d been the night they all met. According to Elliot, that was their corner. It wasn’t until Cate had hung up her coat that she noticed her new friends’ eyes focused directly across the bar. Following their line of vision, Cate immediately saw what held their attention.

  “God, are those really the kind of girls he likes?” Cate couldn’t contain her disgust.

  “No, sweetie, those are just the kinds of skanks he fucks.”

  “Oh, well, that clears it up. Thanks, Lyla.”

  “Shhh, this is fun.” Ashley moved past Ryan and over to Lyla, and Janie, with a rag wrapped between her hands. “I swear, in all the years I’ve known him, I’ve never seen him look like that. Shit, I can’t even identify that look. Can you? Oh, hey, Cate. Hey, Ells.” Ashley stood tucked in the corner to watch what was apparently becoming quite an extraordinary scene.

  “Yeah,” Lyla smirked, her confident answer directed solely at Cate. “Janie and I were just discussing the very same thing. Seems like our boy is finally growing up.”

  Shifting her stance, Cate watched Kyle’s conversation play out. His tall body wasn’t relaxed and at ease like she’d seen it when he was with his friends or even in her presence. Instead, he appeared annoyed, put out, like the woman draping herself on the bar was a nuisance, not entertainment. Part of her felt green with envy as she watched the scantily dressed woman lick her lips and shake her breasts, knowing the chances were high that Kyle had been with her or would be sometime soon. The green, however, morphed into red when the skank, as Lyla referred to her, reached over the bar in an attempt to touch Kyle.

  Sure, Kyle was a big guy, perfectly capable of handling himself and, by the sounds of it, doing a mighty fine job, but Cate’s body was moving quicker than her mind, and there was no stopping her.

  “Excuse me,” she said, tapping Kyle’s admirer on the shoulder. Even in her high heels, the pink leopard print wearing, bleached blonde only came up to Cate’s shoulders. “I swear I heard the man tell you he wasn’t interested. And unless the bleach you used to dye your hair seeped into your brain, his body language is more than clear, even if his words weren’t. So why don’t you back off. And by the way, there are no pink leopards in nature.” The woman gasped at Cate’s verbal smack-down and then made her way to the other side of the bar. Cate’s heart pounded in her chest. She’d just made a spectacle of herself, and she couldn’t help but smile over it. Winking at Kyle and loving the way he devoured her with his eyes, she turned on her booted heel and walked back to the corner to share in a community toast with the girls.

  After last call was announced, the crowd began to dwindle. Kyle rested on a chair, icing down his elevated leg. He watched as Ryan showed the new guy, Ando, just how clean-up and break-down was done at the end of each night, and Ashley served the water and called taxis for the patrons who needed either or both. All while Lyla, Janie, and Elliot chatted endlessly on their barstools, giggling about anything and everything imaginable.

  Even with the dull throb echoing down from his hip to his ankle, Kyle felt a sense of peace he hadn’t known in way too long. He was happy to be in Danny’s, amongst his friends. Christ, it’s amazing what a clear fucking mind can do. Not to mention someone that actually makes you feel good about yourself. Just thinking about how Cate handled the run-in with Sinus Infection—Christ, how she was with all the women who came on to him and flirted with him. He wouldn’t have been nearly as calm if the situation were reversed, and he needed to sit back and watch random men ogle her. Fuck, they weren’t even dating and the woman was rocking his fucking world. Pink leopards, she was funny as hell, also.

  “Here, take these. They should help with the pain.” Cate placed two Ibuprofens and a glass of water on the table in front of him. Did he look that bad? Could she see the weakness that lay just beneath his surface?

  “Kyle, you’re in pain. You worked your ass off tonight. Take the pain medicine. Its over-the-counter stuff, but it should take the edge off.” What took the edge off was seeing understanding, not pity, in the whisky brown eyes that penetrated his soul.

  “What are your plans on Saturday?” He hadn’t meant to blurt out the question, but with the night quickly coming to an end, he wasn’t ready to say goodbye to her.

  “Elliot and I have an event tomorrow night that we’ve been putting together for months. So we’ll be working our asses off tomorrow. Saturday should be pretty low key, why?”

  “Spend it with me.” Kyle wasn’t sure who was more shocked by his request, him or her.

  Tipping her head to the side, he could practically hear the cogs turning in her mind. “Just friends, right, Kyle?”

  It pained him to agree because there was much more than platonic friendship sparking between them, but he’d give her time if that’s what she needed. “Just friends, Angel.”

  While her brain screamed no, the rest of her implored her to accept the invitation.

  “Okay, I need to hit the gym first thing. I don’t like to miss Saturdays. How about if I come over after that?” Knowing that Kyle still didn’t have his license took the guess work out of where they would spend the day, which was fine with her because if and when things became uncomfortable, she could just leave.

  “Nah,” he shook his head. “I’ve gotta work out, too. Come to me early, and we can go to my gym. It’s supposed to be snowy on Saturday, how about afterwards we hang in and watch some movies. I must have a chick-flick somewhere in my collection.” Kyle chuckled when she pretended to gag.

  “Clearly we do need to spend time together. I don’t do chick-flicks; they aren’t realistic.” She shook her head. Nope, there was no such thing as everlasting, unconditional love. “I am more of an action/adventure girl. Oh and anything with Superheroes or Hobbits, and I’m there. What? Why are you laughing at me? Kyle!”

  “Look, I dig your taste in movies, but saying in one breath that romance isn’t realistic but elves and men in tights are…” Kyle chuckled, his dimple sunk deep into his cheek, drawing all of her attention to the indentation. “Yeah, I’ve gotta question your judgment.” The man was dangerous to her libido. How she was going to spend an entire day in his presence without ending up on him or under him was beyond her. But she needed to try. Although, the reasons were becoming less and less clear.

  Friday was a blur. Between work at the store and the black-tie event that she and Elliot organized for a local business, Cate ran around from morning until well after midnight. Shout It Out had been their baby since before she and Elliot graduated college. Over the past ten years, they’d grown the business from a small start-up into a perfectly operating company that pays two generous salaries and several hourly workers to help with events. Work was where Cate found tranquility amo
ng the chaos. She’d always been able to blend into the background while making magic happen around her. However, during that particular day, things were different. People were noticing her. The clients were approaching her with questions instead of bringing all the issues to Elliot, and their staff was smiling at her each time their paths crossed. “Weird”

  “What’s weird?” Elliot asked, handing Cate a bottle of water.

  “People,” Cate responded shrugging her shoulders to an obviously perplexed Elliot. “They’re talking to me and smiling and stuff. I don’t know. It’s…weird.”

  Giggles bubbled from Elliot’s perky body. “Catey, you crack me up. You don’t even notice do you?”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about, Ells.”

  “Catey, you’ve been walking around with a perma-smile painted on your face all day. It’s inviting and completely opposite from the blank stare you usually wear. People are just responding to you. Enjoy it.”

  Elliot’s assessment resonated long after she fluttered away to handle whatever catastrophe arose between then and party time. Maybe she was right. Cate was feeling happier, and it had to do with more than just work. She and Kyle had texted a few times earlier that morning, and he called her to see how things were going around lunch time. She’d mentioned she was too busy to leave and grab food, and before she knew it, pizza was delivered for her and Elliot, courtesy of the sexy bartender.

  She sent him a selfie of her in her cocktail dress just before the event started.

  DirtyMan: Fuck, Angel, behind the bar thank god…

  DirtyMan: Can hang a towel off my cock

  Cate: *blushing* lol dirty man

  DirtyMan: Oops, are we still just friends?

  Cate: ???

  DirtyMan: Don’t fuck with me, Red. you know I want you.

  Cate: See you in the am

  DirtyMan: Text me when you get home. Don’t let anyone look at you in that dress.

  Cate: Have fun tonight

  Hours later and dead on her feet, Cate crawled in between her sheets. The evening was a complete success, landing her and Elliot even more referrals from the party. But the only thing that kept swirling through her mind was the brooding bartender and the way he made her feel.

  Cate: I’m home. Good night

  Danny’s was still open. Therefore, she hadn’t expected to hear back from him, especially not right away, so when the phone vibrated, she couldn’t help the smile that curved over her mouth.

  DirtyMan: Sweet Dreams, Angel

  Bitter Pill

  “MY GOD, CATE, you weren’t fucking around back there. I’ve never seen anything like it.” Kyle and Cate were walking back to his apartment after a grueling work-out. He knew she had an amazing body; every inch of it was burned into his memory banks. Christ, he had no clue how hard she worked to keep it. Kyle’s gym wasn’t glamorous. The people who went there went to work, not to socialize. He figured he would need to show Cate around and apologize for the subpar conditions. He was wrong. After a forty minute haul on the treadmill, she confidently approached the gym’s owner. He desperately wanted to intervene, but the bigger part wanted to see just what else the woman had up her sleeve.

  “Kyle, you should have seen your face when I entered the ring with Adam. It was priceless.”

  “Priceless? Cate, I wanted to kill that son-of-a-bitch every time he put his hands on you. My God, you’re a woman.” His blood boiled just thinking about her fighting that guy. Adam Voss was a career fitness trainer and fighter. He was working his way up the MMA circuit on a professional level.

  “Don’t be a pig, Kyle.” Stopped at his front door, Kyle looked behind him to see there wasn’t a trace of humor in either her tone or her face. Clearly, he struck a nerve. But seeing Cate striking and grappling with a guy taller and bigger than she was hit a nerve with him as well.

  “Cate, I don’t think it makes me a swine if I don’t think a man should lay his hands on a woman. Ever.” Memories of his father beating his mom the day before she left clouded his brain, as did the many times the man smacked around the sluts, as his dad called them, when they didn’t perform as he saw fit.

  Exhaling, Cate sighed. “I don’t disagree, okay? However, did you watch the same match I fought? I kicked his ass, Ky. I let him work up a sweat, but in the end, I had him on the ground and tapping-out before he knew what hit him. It felt great.” Elation lit up her face. It was as if she needed that fight to prove something to herself. And if he was being honest, watching her command that situation was fucking hot as hell.

  “That boy is big, sure, but he doesn’t have the skill set he needs to win just yet. He’s too cocky. It was a pleasure to knock him down a peg or two.”

  Kyle opened the door and led Cate in to his place. “Well, remind me not to fuck with you. I’m officially scared.” He threw his hands up in defeat as he closed the door and took her coat and gym bag, placing both in the closet. He paused and curiosity peaked when Cate locked his front door before walking farther into his place.

  “I’m gonna take a quick shower. Since you took yours at the gym, why don’t you check out my movie selection. Between my discs and On Demand, I’m sure we can find something realistic.” Her snort filled the room, making him chuckle as he headed into his bedroom.

  Working out always made Cate feel good, but sparring in a ring with a properly matched partner, that’s what kept her sane. Saturday’s were the days that she sparred with Derrick, her only other friend besides Elliot, at her regular gym.

  The pair had been training together for ages, each with their own demons to slay, each fighting to squash the never-ending nightmares that plagued their minds and haunted their dreams. Derrick was a good guy with a kind heart. Early in their friendship, they swapped watered down versions of their horrors, neither dug deeper into the other’s story and neither shared more than what needed to be told. After more than ten years, they had a lovely rapport forged in understanding and ignorance.

  While running on the treadmill at Kyle’s gym got her blood pumping, the unfamiliar surroundings kept Cate from feeling grounded. Stability was something she couldn’t be without for long before her world would start to close in around her, choking the air from her lungs and the vision from her sight. Panic had already begun to weave its way around her gut when she saw the ring in the corner and the fighters gearing up to grapple. That’s when she knew control was only a hairsbreadth away. Once she recited her qualifications to the gym owner and saw the acceptance glittering in his eyes, she knew she’d found the ground.

  Yes, she’d lied to Kyle when she played down Adam’s fighting abilities. The guy was good, very good. But she hadn’t been bragging when she told him she was better. She was, in fact, faster, smarter, and more skilled than Adam was, and a hard battle was exactly what she needed. Once her muscles were fatigued, her mind was quieted, and then the rest of her world clicked into place.

  “Did you find anything good to watch?” Trapped in her own thoughts, Cate’s instinct overrode logic, forcing her survival skills to kick in; Kyle’s hand went from her shoulder to twisted behind his own back within a fraction of a second.

  “Whoa, Cate.” Kyle forced his body to relax. It was clear that Cate was in panic mode, and his reacting even out of self-defense would only make it worse. Those were lessons learned growing up the child of an abusive alcoholic. “Cate, it’s okay.” His voice was gentled and calm. “I’m sorry, Angel. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

  Her grip immediately released, leaving Kyle’s arm at his side and more than a foot of physical space between them.

  “Kyle, oh my God. I am so so sorry.” Cate placed her right hand over her face, her breathing ragged as she apologized over and over again.

  Torn between wanting to give her the space she needed to feel safe and the support she deserved to feel cared for, Kyle inched closer but made his intentions clear.

  “Angel, stop apologizing. It’s not your fault. Sometimes I forget that we haven’t know
n each other forever. I didn’t mean to sneak up on you like that.” He led her over to the sofa and sat down only after she found a spot and settled in.

  “It isn’t your fault either, Kyle. This is your place.” Confusion marred her face as she bit her bottom lip. “I usually don’t forget my surroundings. I guess you could say that’s a good thing.” Her eyes wandered to his arm, and she grimaced. “Oh shit, your arm. Is it bad? I’m sorry.”

  Not that he would ever admit it to another living person, but the woman was fierce and strong as hell. She could have easily dislocated his arm had he not caught her attention fast enough.

  “I’m not gonna lie. It could use a little TLC,” he grinned, hopefully easing her guilt. “But other than that, it’s fine, Angel. It’s all good.”

  More questions seemed to be weighing on her mind, but she bit her tongue the way she bit her lip and that wasn’t working for him. “What were you gonna ask me just now?”

  “I was just wondering, why do you call me that? Obviously, I understand why you call me ’Red,’ but why ’Angel’?”

  Weighing his answer left them in an awkward silence, one that had Cate’s cheeks blushing with embarrassment.

  “It’s fine, Kyle; you don’t have to answer.”

  “No, I want to tell you. I just wasn’t sure how much information to give.” With her amber eyes shining brilliantly, Kyle pulled in a deep breath and decided he was about to give her a piece of himself that could have her running far and fast. Yet he also knew, for once, he was willing to take the risk.

  With the adrenalin slowly seeping out of her, Cate relaxed into the cozy leather sofa. She couldn’t remember the last time her body responded on impulse like that. If she wasn’t so embarrassed by her actions, she would have been proud of how naturally her body sprang into action. Thank God for Kyle, he was amazing. The man took everything in stride. He neither showed the temper she’d been warned about nor responded with harsh words and cruel looks implying guilt or blame. No, he talked her down and gave her space. He once again made her feel safe, a feeling she was beginning to associate with him.

 

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