“It would take a hell of a lot of force to hurt someone with so much padding.”
“No. No, no, no, no… Jace!”
I slipped my hand from Laiken’s cheek and balled up my fist. I connected my knuckles with the man’s face, dislocating his jaw on the spot. People in the bar shrieked as the bartender fired off a blank warning shot, trying to get everyone to settle the fuck down. Devon was on his back, cradling his jaw as it swung from his face.
My hand was trembling with unused energy. I could feel Laiken’s wide eyes on me as I stood over the guy. He was whimpering as tears streamed down his cheeks, and all I could do was smile. He got what was coming to him, and I was ready to give him more. I was ready to tear into that pretty little face of his and claw out those mischievous, manipulative eyes.
I wanted to make sure this man could never do to a woman what he just tried to do with Laiken.
“Jace!”
Her voice pierced my beast-like haze, and I turned my eyes towards her. Her beautiful hazel eyes were wide with shock, but she hadn’t yet run. She was still standing there, watching my every move.
“Get the fuck out of here,” the bartender said.
I walked back over to the bar and grabbed my leather jacket. I threw it over my shoulders and watched as people tried to help Devon up off the floor. He was moaning and gurgling as blood and spit spilled from his lips, and I grinned at the mess that asshole now was.
One fucking punch was all it took for wusses like him.
Then my eyes settled onto Laiken. She was staring at me from the middle of the floor, gazing at me in the shadows. I locked my eyes with her and straightened my back as the bar erupted into a disaster zone of people taking pictures and others making phone calls.
I had to get out of here, and I wasn’t willing to leave Laiken to fend for herself.
I stepped from the shadows, and I saw something like relief flood her features. I stood there at the corner of the bar, waiting for her to make a move. To run out the door or come over and slap me. To get her stuff and get out or sit down and order another fucking drink. I didn’t know what she was going to do and I didn’t know where to go from here, so I did the only thing I could think of.
I held out my hand for her.
She looked at it momentarily before her eyes made their way back up to mine. There was a mixture of disbelief and curiosity racing behind her eyes. I stood there, waiting for her to make her choice as my mind screamed at her for her to take my hand.
Then, the flashing and sounds of sirens raced into the parking lot of the bar.
Everyone began to scatter, and Laiken lunged for me. Her hand slipped into mine, and I pulled her towards the back exit. We barreled out into the alleyway and took a hard right, wrapping around the building to where I had parked my bike.
In the shadows, so I could come and go unannounced.
I unlocked the cargo container and removed two helmets. I handed her one as I slid mine on, but she just looked at it like she didn’t know what to do. Conflict roared in front of her eyes as she looked at the helmet.
The same helmet she’d worn all those years ago. When we were young and in love.
“Put it on,” I said. “I need to get you out of here.”
And without a second thought, she obeyed.
Chapter 12
Laiken
As I clung to his waist on the bike, more memories resurfaced. His bike was the first, and last, motorcycle I’d ever ridden on. So many times had his bike taken me away from my abhorrent household. So many times had his bike rescued me from my mother. His bike became synonymous with freedom and happiness and joy when I was with him. I would hear him rumbling down the road, and my skin would pucker. I would hear him strike it up in the parking lot of my school building and a smile would cross my face.
And his bike still had that same effect.
Throwing my leg over the back of his bike, I slid my arms around his waist. I could smell him. Every single scent he had on his body. The smoke from the bar and the beer on his breath and the cologne he swore he never wore. I laid my head against his back as we roared off down the alleyway. Away from the police cars and the illegal activities and the flashing lights.
I was in disbelief. I felt the rumbling of Jace’s bike between my legs, and I shook my head. The streets and the trees were whizzing by our bodies while the wind whipped around our legs. When I entered the bar that night, the last thing I expected was to come face-to-face with my sordid past. To be reminded of the things that once were. The things that once brought me happiness. The one thing I would’ve never expected from a night like this was to find myself wrapped around the one man I couldn’t let go.
And now that I had my arms around him, it was going to make that concept even harder.
But I loved the feeling of him. I had missed the feeling of him. The chiseled abdomen I clung to when I was younger was still there, and the breadth of his strong back was still supporting my cheek. My thighs were pressed into his as I straddled his bike… the same one we’d ridden together on so many occasions. We’d made love on this bike. More times than I could count. I’d sucked his cock, and he kissed me from head to toe. We tainted alleyways with our professions of love and spilled cum onto the grounds of cities we got lost in.
This bike held special memories for us, and I could feel myself drowning in them.
We drove through the back streets of Henderson, trying to get away from all the drama. My hands began to roam up his body, feeling the divots and peaks of his chiseled form. I felt the heat growing between my legs as my body responded to his movements. The way he leaned into the turns and the way he mindlessly scooted back into my body. I clung to him as we rode in the dark, our bodies magnetized to one another as I tried to talk myself out of the one thing that was racing through my mind.
My lips were so close to pressing in between his shoulder blades.
I hated that I wanted him. I hated that after everything he put me through, I still cared. I hated myself for growing warm for him. I hated my body for wetting itself for him. I’d encountered more men in my line of work than any other gender to speak of, and never once had I felt this pull towards them. Never once had I felt the desperate need to cling to them. Or hold them. Or scoot closer to them.
Like I was doing now. With Jace.
As much as I wanted to keep denying my want for him, I no longer could. My body was betraying me with every turn we took. Every road we turned onto held another secret. Another signal that my body threw out to show me that I wasn’t going to win. To show me that my logical mind wasn’t going to rule this scenario. And the, a terrifying thought occurred to me. One I tried to stifle by screaming at myself inside my mind. But as my hands ran back down his abs and sat dangerously close to his cock, I found my lips silently whispering the phrase.
“I love you, Jace.”
I still loved him. I had convinced myself I had stopped, but that wasn’t what had happened. Every time I compared a man to Jace, I was convincing my heart that Jace was still the best. Every time I shrugged off a man’s advances, I was giving Jace power over me. Every time I turned down a man’s want to go home with me, I was leaving myself open to the idea that Jace would come knocking on my door.
And now that I was here with him, I could no longer deny what I was doing.
The lights of Henderson passed us by as I closed my eyes. I could feel Jace’s heart beating in his back. I could feel it strumming against my cheek. My arms tightened around his body, and my legs pressed mindlessly into his. Arousal was pooling in my underwear, and my tits were rising to peaks I didn’t want to acknowledge. The way Jace moved with his bike… it was like he was a part of it. One of the gears or the motor or the oil running through the pipes. The road thundered underneath us as Jace had our getaway quick, and soon the sirens of the corners of Vegas could only be heard echoing off the recesses of my mind.
Everything smelled and felt so familiar. From the way, Jace’s muscles twitched to the way the r
ubber on the road smelled. I could feel freedom sinking beneath my skin. I could feel those phantoms pangs of wild nature thrumming throughout my body. This bike could take me anywhere. Jace could take me anywhere. All I had to do was lift my lips to his ear and whisper, and it would be all mine. We could travel to California like we did one weekend after my mother called me worthless. We could travel into Mexico and bask in the sunlight like we’d always talked about. We could travel to Utah and ride up to the tallest peak in the state.
Then we could make love underneath the setting sun before we set up camp.
There were so many things we promised to do together. So many things we dreamed about in between the lies and the fighting. When I wasn’t reminded of the fact that he was ashamed to have me in his life, we talked of road trips and dingy motels. Crossing the country to see New Year’s Even happen in the brightest city the U.S. had to offer. We talked about traveling to Florida and having actual key lime pie and venturing to New Orleans and seeing who could hold out the longest during Mardi Gras.
We were wild and free and not tied down by adult responsibilities. I had my whole life ahead of me when I’d met Jace, and by the time I fell in love with him, I could see him at my side. Walking me through life and supporting me through the hard moments.
But despite all of that, it was hard to ignore his lies. It was hard to swallow the fact that he didn’t want me meeting his friends. It was hard to be left in the middle of the night or early in the morning, only to be told he’d be back soon without letting me know where he was.
It was hard, and it got old fast.
That was the first time we’d ever fought. One of our bike rides was interrupted by a phone call he received. I could tell it was urgent by the way he spoke, but instead of taking me with him or filling me in, he simply dropped me off at my place. Gave me a quick peck on the cheek and told me he’d be back soon.
He was gone for four days before I heard from him, and the lies flowed forth ever since that moment.
I felt the bike slow down before we pulled into an abandoned parking lot. He pulled off into the shadows behind an abandoned building and brought his bike to a stop. He put the kickstand down and shut the engine off, and I scurried away as quickly as I could. I needed to breathe something that wasn’t tainted by him. I needed to get my hands away from his rock hard form. I needed to keep my eyes diverted from his, and I needed to focus on what the fuck had just happened.
He almost killed a man tonight.
“We needed to get away from the bar,” he said as I slid my helmet off.
I scoffed and shook my head as the hazy fog of his musky scent slowly lifted from my body. We were in a part of Henderson I recognized. A part of the town that had flourished when I was a child. But now, it was worn down. Abandoned. Forgotten and overgrown with weeds. My eyes took in the dark scenery before me as broken windows cast jagged shadows on the walls of abandoned homes. I saw the playground I used to play in, the swings rusted and the merry-go-round bent and cockeyed. I saw the old gas station that used to sell one-dollar slushies, its doors were torn to shreds and the walls spray-painted with gang signs.
I looked up the hill behind us and saw an old and abandoned diner. Reminiscent of the one Jace and I used to frequent.
“Is that…?”
“Yep. That was Sassy’s Diner. Don’t worry, though. They didn’t shut down. Just moved.”
I nodded as my gaze slowly panned back over to Jace.
I had no idea how I needed to feel at that moment. Was I supposed to be sad? Upset? Scared? Defeated? I was turned on. I was ready to hop his bones and recreate our fondest memories on his bike. My eyes raked over his tight shirt, his chest swelling as I looked back up to his eyes. He loomed in the shadows as the darkness cast jagged outlines upon his face.
But his eyes.
They were always softer than the rest of him.
But instead of settling on that, I settled on anger. He had dislocated a man’s jaw with one punch. He almost choked the fucking life out of him. He barged back into my life thinking he had some sort of claim on me, and that needed to be addressed.
No matter how much fire coursing through my veins was setting my body aflame.
“What the hell was that, Jace?”
Chapter 13
Snake
I sighed with a groan before I shook my head. Of course, that was all she latched onto. My actions back at the bar. Screw the fact that I’d gotten her out of trouble. Screw the fact that I’d saved her from whatever disgusting bullshit that asshole had in store for her. Fuck the fact that it was obvious she wanted me with the way she was feeling me up on the damn bike ride.
I was the one at fault. Always me.
“I’m not your property anymore, Jace. What the fuck was that?” Laiken asked.
“Are you really upset that I got you away from that asshole?” I asked.
“No!” she said. “I’m pissed because you apparently thought it was your responsibility!”
“Seriously, Laiken? I saved your ass.”
“Because you thought my ass was yours. Admit it.”
I stared into her eyes and saw them dripping with frustration. Years of pent-up anger and forgotten memories were surfacing for her. It was obvious she’d tried to forget me. Tried to move on and was unable to do so. I never tried. I tried to replicate the feeling I had with her, but I never attempted to erase her. She was the best damn thing that had ever happened to me, and I wanted to make sure I held onto that. Held onto that standard, she set in my life.
But it was clear I was not a standard to her, and it only twisted the knife she was plunging into my gut.
“You creep out from the shadows and come over to me in some random fucking bar because a guy is touching me and you expect me to thank you? I would’ve gotten that man off me. You know me better than that. And if I struggled, that bartender would’ve blown the guy’s fucking dick off before he got me out of there. Why the hell were you necessary?” she asked.
Anger was coursing through her veins. She held my helmet underneath her arm as she balled up her fists. Her body was trembling. Shaking with the words she never got to say to me that day.
The day I tossed her out of my fucking house.
“You think you own me, but you don’t,” she said. “You think you loved me, but you didn’t. You lied to me, Jace. You lied to me, you accused me of turning into my mother. You made me fall in love with you before doing fuck-knows-what. I assumed you were probably cheating. Creeping around behind my back. Why the hell else would you have been done for days on end? Getting up in the middle of the night? Lying to me about the ‘boring life’ you told me you had? Huh!?”
I let her yell at me. I let her get it out. It turned my stomach that she thought I could cheat on her. After the perfection, she’d brought into my world. When I was with her, I tried to get her to see what she meant to me. I tried to learn how to treat her. I tried to learn how to spoil her and comfort her and love her in the ways she needed. I stood up for her. Defended her to people in her life that walked all over her and tried to diminish the light she brought into this fucking hellhole.
But she was right. I had lied on multiple occasions to keep her at arm’s length with my own life. Partially because of her aspiring dreams, and partially because I wanted to protect her.
And I would never take those motives back. I would never take back the lies I fed her. Pushing her away was the best thing I did for her because had I introduced her to my life she might have rejected me. Spat at me. Called me pathetic. Possibly even came after us if she had pursued her dreams. But if she hadn’t? If she had accepted my life and kept her mouth shut?
She would’ve been there at the shootout. The night with The Devil Saints that changed all of us forever.
“You know, I could never prove you were cheating,” Laiken said. “I went through your phone. Dialed numbers to see who you fucking pick up. Asked you repeated questions to see if I could get you to trip up in your sto
ries. I would check your body for marks when we made love and smell your clothes after you’d come back in. You made me paranoid. Your lies and your deceit made me lesser of a fucking person. I stooped to doing things I cringe at people for now. But there’s one thing I can prove. One thing you did do that you will never come back from.”
I braced myself for the hurt I knew was going to come with her words. The one thing she could accuse me of that was true.
The one thing that made me physically sick at night.
“You broke my heart,” she said. “You ripped it from my chest, you heel-stomped it into the ground, and you left it to rot.”
I didn’t know what else to do. Her words cut to the bone as she left me to bleed out on the street. Tears were cresting her eyes as she tossed her helmet at my chest. I caught it in my hand without a second thought and propped it up underneath my arm. She had every right to be upset. Every right to say what she was saying. She had every right to accuse me of cheating because what the fuck else was I supposed to be doing? No woman thought her man was involved with a gang. The most common answer was cheating.
And even though it angered me that she could think that about me, I could understand her train of thought.
What else was I supposed to do, though? Just… let her in to that life? I tried to protect my sister from it, and look at what it fucking got her. She spread her legs for a guy I tried to keep her away from, and now she was holed up in the fucking main lodge of our compound trying to outlive an impending war. She got sucked right into the middle of shit that didn’t even concern her because Talon got selfish and couldn’t control his dick.
“You broke my fucking heart, Jace. And I don’t think I ever touched yours.”
Her words echoed off the recesses of my mind, and I lost it. Even though I knew I needed to keep my mouth shut, that was not a lie I was going to allow her to convince herself of.
“Never touched mine? Laiken, are you fucking serious!? You don’t think, for one measly second, that you broke mine in the process?” I asked.
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