***
Lepus sat on the edge of his bed, looking at the graphs he had drawn on his whiteboard.
A light tapping at Lepus's door caused him to look up. Standing in the doorway was a short, skinny man wearing a large snow jacket.
"I'm uh, in this room," he said with an awkward look.
"Oh, okay" Lepus said trying to be as welcoming as he could. Until now the second bed in his room had gone unused. It hadn't occurred to him that at some point they would place someone with him. Thinking about it, it seemed silly to Lepus that it hadn't crossed his mind before.
"My name is Tony, they said your name was Lepus at the front desk." the man said, stepping into the room.
"Yes that’s right, " Lepus said awkwardly, trying not to stare at the man, but fascinated by how normal he seemed compared to everyone else Lepus had encountered in the hospital so far.
The man placed his bag on the floor and sat down on the other bed in the room. Then started rifling through his bag.
The man was wearing a puffy sports jacket and Lepus wondered if perhaps scars riddled his arms. Or even clean thin lines, scattered with snakes but are laden with years old scars and fresh wounds alike. No cuts and tears, from his constant attempts. He showed no outward signs of aggression. Or maybe he is just cold, seemed strange, but it was cold. Maybe his arms were clean, and Lepus was wrong.
“I’d like to go to sleep now,” he said after putting away most of his clothes. Lepus nodded with a smile and turned out his light.
Getting into bed, Lepus closed his eyes and placed headphones over his eyes. Soft music made him drift into unconsciousness. After he was asleep he rolled over and his headphones fell to the rooms floor.
Tony tossed and turned in a deep sleeper across from Lepus. Eventually his audible snores woke Lepus, but he didn’t mind
Eventually Tony started to drone and talk in his sleep. The sleep slowly turned to painful disturbing pleas and whimpers as Lepus continued to stare at the ceiling. Then Tony started rolling and fitting without warning. Lepus couldn’t see but could hear through the darkness of the room. Lepus sat up in bed and listened intently, trying to decide if he should call for a nurse.
Lepus wasn’t sure but Tony seemed to contort then coughed. Making dry reaching gargling noises before quickly slipping into silence then smooth snoring returned.
Lepus lay back and continued to listen intently. He fell asleep listening to the snores of Tony, on edge at the thought that he had had a seizure.
In the morning, Lepus awoke to a knock at the door “Breakfast guys”, a blonde nurse that Lepus had never seen said, poking her head through the door. A student on rounds maybe, they always seemed to be rotating around.
Lepus's feet slumped onto the floor. He raised himself up on his bed and let his body pull itself to stand above them. Then dragged each foot towards the door, noting that Tony's chest was still rising and falling with ease.
As Lepus walked toward the kitchen, his eyes darted past the window into High Dependency.
Past the nurses ‘Fish Bowl’, as some of the other patients called it, a large glass divide between their office and the common room.
On the HD, Lepus got a glance of Miriam, the chubby, frantic looking woman. She was moisturizing her face and arms in a frenzy. Seeing him, she began to wave with enthusiasm, almost dropping the bottle of moisturiser. Lepus ducked his head and pretended to scratch his forehead, not easing his stride, so that his face wasn’t easily viewable to her.
***
Condensation with no Concentration
Lepus rolled over towards Alice, straying away from the wetness at the side of the tent. In the distance, he heard wails, cheers, and a baseline of music as the festival raged on into the night. The roar and excitement called out to him. Drew him towards it, but his body ached and so he shuffled into his sleeping bag, trying to get deeper. Fighting against his thoughts. Urging him to stay in the warmth. In the dry, less windy tent. His legs felt full of lactic acid, strained from walking, dancing and running all day.
They had lost the under sheet for the tent the night before, rushing to try and get in amongst the music. Amongst the kababs, and the bohemian excitement.
Lepus had thought they would be cuddling. Squished together warmer than toast under both their sleeping bags by now. For some reason, as they slumped back into their tent after a long night. Alice had slipped her slender body into her bag and rolled over.
“It’s so wet,” Lepus whispered across the empty, misty air. Silence followed. Lepus poked his nose out of the sleeping bag and breathed out. He moved his hips so that his body was next to hers. Now and then the bags would touch, just, and make a swishing sound. Lepus stares at the roof of the tent it feels like Alice was awake, but he can’t think why she’d be pretending. ‘Just being paranoid’ he thought. No one would be lying awake thinking about something and not answer him. Unless maybe he did something wrong last night. He thought back over the evening and but came up with nothing.
‘Maybe she’s just deep in thought’ he thought, rolling onto his back. He stared at the ceiling. Watching the rain trickle down the side of the tent, and converging on the outside.
“Alice?” his voice cracked, “Are you awake?” he crooned, rocking her shoulder.
Maybe she is asleep, Lepus thinks. She had always been such a sweet, silent sleeper. He remembered the first night she fell asleep in his arms. How much she looked like a little angel. Because when she drifted off, her breathing didn’t change. Her face relaxed. The light smile was drifting from her face. Easing into the look of a pure, perfect porcelain doll in his arms. Her head didn’t droop or roll. Just rested snugly in the crook of his left arm.
“I’m going to sleep in the car, it's too wet on my side,” he said with a frown. Worried that if she isn’t faking it, she’ll soon awake worried.
Lepus unzips the tent, hoping that she’ll be fine. He can see the tent from the car anyway. He climbed awkwardly into the front seat, then started to peak off his clothes,which are now completely soaked from the walk to the car. He pulled a warm woollen jumper from the back seat and arranged himself back into his sleeping bag. As he drifts off finally to sleep, he stares at a nearby street lamp, glowing in the mist.
A few hours later, he awoke. Twisting and turning from facing the driver side door to face the passenger side, as the door opened. Alice slipped into her sleeping bag on the car seat next to him, smiling sweetly and closed her eyes. Lepus reached out his hand and placed it next to her face. Stroking her cheek. She opened her eyes for a moment. Her wondrous green eyes, illuminated by the lamp light.
She closed her eyes and shrugd her shoulders getting more comfortable. She pried her right hand from her sleeping bag. Interlocking her fingers with Lepus. Sighing and seem so gratified that she’s back in his presence. Like waking up and walking to the car was a great journey, and she has won herprize. Like a kitten with a ball of long-chased twine in her hand.
For a moment, Lepus thinks back to how he had thought she was pensive, and how worried he had been. Worried that, maybe, she had been weighing his qualities against another suitor.
***
The morning breeze brushed Lepus’s hair from his eyes. He stared at the concrete below.
Looking up he saw out onto the campus of the university where he worked. He had never seen the view from the top level of the car park before.
There were usually car spaces on the lower levels. Lepus had never had to drive all the way to the top level. He was usually amongst the earliest of the student body to arrive. It was hours before the campus would get busy, so he was all alone. But beneath him, he could see students rushing to get to their early classes. Some laughing, pushing each other. Some jumping and spinning on the nearby sports oval.
His brother might have been down there, attending practice for one of his many sports teams. The students just walked like a peppered sea of units towards the auditoriums.
A stronger wind pushed Lepus from
his back, but he looked at his feet and steadied himself, causing him to rock back and forth. He immediately wondered why he'd done that and stared at the distant ground. He started to wonder and how long he’d been standing there. Maybe longer than he realised, his tall figure as clear to those on the ground as they were to him. He looked around for anyone watching, but the change of the hour had passed moments ago. Even the late stragglers were inside their classes.
Lepus detected the smooth scent of coffee from a cafe somewhere near campus. It must have been so distant and was so fast he thought he must have imagined it.
The wind caught his doctoral ID hanging from the lanyard around his neck, and it started flapping against his chest. A distant bell sounded the start of a primary school’s day. Then all fell silent, noises he hadn't registered ceased. For a moment, it seemed traffic and birds as far as he could hear stopped. The world, his world. Was silent.
Lepus opened his mobile; a text message sits unread, and he presses open:
Do what you want, I don’t care
Lepus clicked and clacked for a moment and then hit reply;
So I can jump off this ledge?
The reply was almost instantaneous from Alice; Don’t you fucking dare.
A moment passes as he watches a professor below drop his notes. He fumbled around trying to catch them all in the light wind. A “ting’ noise floated up from Lepus’s pocket.
“I’m not explaining again. I do care. Stop lying to me and yourself. You know I care, I meant I don’t care what you do with the present you got me.” The text reads. He knew he was cruel. The heavy pitted feeling in his stomach, along with the thought of the pictures he saw the other day of Alice and her new boyfriend, seems to make it easier for him to not care less.
“Fine, I won’t jump, I’ll get your sister to give you the present when I see her next.” He writes back. No reply, he stepped down, disappointed, anfwalked back to his office. Back to his quantum equation, she supposed.
***
Grim and Bare
A loud crack rang out across the field, and the spiders turned towards it. The scorpion scuttled away, surrounded by a group of its minions.
The sound which had distracted the spiders was a huge beetle. It had been broken in half and lay bleeding bright yellow thick blood and guts. It was right in the middle of the field, and the dragon stood victoriously over it.
The spiders surrounding Lepus jumped at the sight of their master fleeing. Lepus brought the rifle up close to his face. Locking the butt under his shoulder, between his arm and body, as he’d seen in history books. He aimed it at the spider in front of him. The spider turned and ran in the direction the Scorpius had fled. A few of the other spiders followed. The great dragon flapped its mighty wings and slowly ascended into the sky growling at the spiders surrounding Lepus.
Many of insects and spiders were fleeing in all directions. Lepus spun around and took two steps backwards pointing the rifle at the remaining spiders. He gripped the gun tight. His fingers grew white from his grip. He was shaking, but the spiders didn’t notice in all commotion. They hissed at him, edging backwards. Lepus stood unwavering with the dragon at his back. Lepus had never held a gun before and wasn’t even sure he would be able to fire it. Let alone be able to hit anything.
The dragon let off a final roar and blew a typhoon of fire into the air. The last of the Scorpius’s forces dissipated, and the ants all stood under the dragon just behind it. They stood in ordered ranks, twitching their antennas.
The last of the spiders in front of Lepus hissed loudly. Almost a scream and turned and ran away.
Lepus dropped the rifles to the floor and let out a giant sigh. Then fell to his knees panting. One of the ants walked up to him and picked up the gun. As the dragon floated to the ground.
The ant placed one of its legs onto Lepus’s shoulder. “Well done my lad,” it said with a gruff aged tone. It turned and yelled at the ranks. “Attention!” Then continued to make loud scratching noises. Tracing the ant’s arms with his eyes Lepus saw that the ant was stroking a spike which ran along its abdomen with one of its hind legs.
The ants in unison turned and started walking away. Lepus picked himself up and walked over to where the dragon now stood. It was almost three stories high and lowered its head in a bow as Lepus approached. Then it motioned to where the Scorpius had stood. Lepus looked over and then back at the dragon shrugging. The dragon motion again and as Lepus looked he noted a glint as the sun hit something shiny.
Lepus walked over and pushed away the dirt and rocks on top of the object. He gripped it and pulled out a grand, shining sword. It was laden with diamonds and even though it had been covered in dirt was as clean as anything Lepus had ever seen. In the centre of its hilt was inlaid a shining gem.
Lepus held it above his head to show the dragon that he had it.
Inhaling deeply Lepus sat up in his bed. He was sweating, and his bedroom was blurry around him. He blinked twice trying to get back his focus. He breathed heavily, and his heart raced. He felt like he had been pulled out of a pool. His mind was fuzzy, and the room seemed to spin around him for a moment. It grinded to a stop and everything was still.
Lepus lay down and tried to go back to sleep.
Lepus’s feet struck the ground with force. Black leather boots were bashing against the ground as he ran.
It was all he could hear aside from his breath and pounding heart. They seemed to all pulse, matching each other's beat. One after another.
He tried to move his arms faster, back and forth. Hoping it would propel him forwards faster.
Five feet behind him a giant bear’s massive paws made crashing scratching sounds as it smashed through the foliage. Getting closer and closer. The garden was dark and seemed vast to Lepus. He hoped that it was getting close to dawn as it seemed as dark aspossible.
He skidded around a tree trying to keep the beast at bay. It was almost upon him and swinging at him with extended claws.
Lepus scuttled to his feet, taking the corner too fast, he had fallen. But it was too late; he looked over his shoulder to see the bear coming down upon him. He turned and got down on one leg. Steeling himself, he pointed the sword he was carrying at the bean and squeezed his eyes tight. Chanting; “The night is always darkest before the dawn.”
He teased all of his muscles and focused on holding himself upright.
He was chanting so loud that he didn’t hear the whooshing noise as the bear impaled itself on the sword. Unable to stop its weight and speed forcing the blade into its chest and almost out the other side. The bear could feel the point pushing the skin outwards at his back. But it did not break the skin.
Lepus opened his eyes and lost his balance. His leg giving out as the bear’s body slouched to his left. The sword came out just as it had gone in. It stayed gripped in Lepus’s hands. The bear by on its back. It’s breath making mist in the air. Lepus stayed sitting on his knees. Lepus had never killed anything before. He hoped that he still hadn't as this had to be just a long strange dream. The longer his nightmare continued, the more vivid it became. A tear welled at the corner of his eye, and he wiped it away with his small hand.
Sniffling he stabbed the sword into the grounded and used it to steady himself and stand up. He eased forward one foot after another. Not wanting the bear to swipe at him once more.
Standing just out of reach to look down at the dark furred creature. Its black coat made it almost blend into the floor. From far away only its size would make it noticeable.
It moved its head to look up at Lepus, but its eyes didn’t seem to be able to focus on him. Its muscles stopped tensing, and its eyes stopped looking around. Then the last of the mist dissipated from about its mouth.
Lepus looked around to see if anyone else had seen what he had done. The dragon’s army had marched off to the south, following the Scorpius’s remaining forces.
Lepus thought going in the opposite direction would be the best idea.
He
assumed the dragon had given him the sword to protect him, and he couldn’t be happier now that it had done so.
As Lepus walked on, the trees started to clear, and he came to an open field. At the same time, it occurred to him that if he did not wake up soon, he would have to work out a way to make himself large again. Which would most likely prove difficult.
Across the field was another forest, but it looked far less dark and foreboding than the one behind him.
He looked up to see the moon larger than he had ever seen before, hanging in the sky. It hadn't occurred to him that he’d be able c to see each blade of grass with clear distinction, so brilliantly itwas somehow illuminated. The field spread out before him in different shades of grey before giving away to the almost pitch black forest.
He stood around twenty paces out of the forest but took no further steps. His breath started to catch up with him. Something was not right. The hair on the back of his neck slowly, but surly, started to rise. He eased his body around, looking in amongst the brush and trees behind him trying to see if someone was watching him.
A light breeze passed near him and made the grass at his feet move like a hand passing over thick carpet. But he saw no one; there was no other sound.
Lepus took another step, listening.He heard nothing, but still took a deep breath in. He gripped the sword, his knuckles turning white, and started moving forwards at a brisk walk. Trying to make no noise in case he heard whatever was making him feel so dark and uneasy. He heard nothing but leaves rustling in the wind which seemed to get louder the faster he walked. He turned around and started jogging backwards. That’s when he realised, the grass was moving, but there was no wind. He felt no warm breeze on his face nor were any of the trees moving in the distance. The movement of the grass got closer and closer.
The Plain White Room Page 5
