“You’ll see,” she said with a smug look on her face. Then linking her arm around his. There was a rustle just outside the side door. Then Alice’s brother appeared standing just outside.
“His room is downstairs,” she said nestling her head on his shoulder.
Alice's sister opened her bedroom door which opened into the dining room.
She seemed to glide without pace; her white dress flowed all the way to the floor. She took a seat next to Lepus.
“Hello, good to see you again,” she said smiling and pulling her chair in.
Major Acana saluted his way out of her room, closing the door after himself. He walked with a limp and wall a heavy man, sturdy, and muscle but not quite as big as Alice’s father. His shiny boots made a clinking noise as he walked across the hardwood floors. As they must have had steel heels.
Alice’s brother sat across from Lepus. As Lepus had done, he squeezed his legs underneath the table as it was not made for tall people. Alice’s sister Lepus sat staring at his cutlery. Alice's hand rested on his knee, and she moved in close and kissed him on his cheek.
She leaned back and shook her head. Making her hair dance back and forth as she took it up with her hands and tied it into a ponytail with a swift flick.
Alice looked back at Lepus and beamed, loving the way he was watching her.
Lepus tried to cross his legs as he often did when he was nervous but the dining table was too low for him to be able to. He loved the long large old bench he was sitting on in Alice's family home.
It was brown aged varnished, and he would often put his hand on it. It appealed to him because he felt like it was real, unlike most of the furniture he owned. New, shiny, fake Ikea furniture. He could never bring himself to buy something this beautiful, though. He was too practical and worried with how others viewed him. Everything he owned was purposeful and useful. He squirmed at his own foolishness. Knowing how often he disagreed with his own thoughts and anxieties frustrated him.
The sound of a distant hum interrupted his thoughts, like white noise. Static that became increasingly loud until he could no longer hear his thoughts. The room felt like it was drifting as he looked around at Alice’s family. They ate calmly, talking and every now and then laughing. All the while Lepus couldn’t hear a word they said, not even his own thoughts. He stared at Alice’s face, as she laughed and spoke with a hurried smile at her brothers and sisters. Silent with her mouth moving, then he could only see her and white all around. The whiteness engulfed her, and he saw nothing but white. Then like a crack, a question came, and the world, the table, chairs and sweet, the kind family appeared once more around him.
“Lepus, would you like a desert?"
"Um, I suppose," his head darted around at each of the family members. Searching their eyes, trying to determine if they intended to join him. "What.. oh what do you have?" as the words left his mouth he already regretted them. What a rude thing to ask. Oh why, oh why had she not asked someone else first so he could just copy their answer.
Alice’s mother smiled. The same smile he’d seen a thousand times before from Alice. That’s where it comes from then, he thought. “Well, let me think,” she cooed. “I think we have either, some Oranges, or Pears. Some Biscuits if you’d like.”
***
The Clearing
Lepus stood in front of the glowing liquid. The sword firmly dug into the soil next to him. He was mesmerized by its glowing shifting colours. The way it moved within itself without the wind or any other force. It rippled and twirled. There were none of the leftover trinkets around, nor the velvet strips. Just the liquid left at the bottom of the glass. Lepus grew tired, and there was no natural light in the cavern. He sat down in the dust, still gazing through the glass at the liquid. A smile started to creep across his face. Watching it was so pleasant and relaxing. His eyes started to grow heavy and droop. For a moment, he closed them and let the quiet slushing of the liquid turning over itself soothe him. However, he soon opened his eyes upon hearing a deep voice. He looked around, but there was nothing. He moved closer in and stared at the now red liquid.
Moving closer to it and peering deep into the patterns of the swirls, there were tiny specks of silver and gold. This time, the voice came clear. Deep and slow.
“Come to me,” it was the voice of a man. But it sounded strange. Sort of hollow and strained.
Lepus stood up and looked around frantically. No one was there.
He put his hand on the sword, but it gave him no comfort. He stood not moving, listening intently, but the voice made not another sound, no matter how long he waited. Soon his gaze drifted back to the liquid. He found himself dropping to his knees and crawling close to it once more.
Looking deeper and deeper into the cascading, spinning swirls. It was now a light yellow and Lepus was within reach of the glass. He felt a warmth coming from the liquid from this distance, and he started to close his eyes again. Considering curling up next to the glass cylinder. This time, when the voice came, he no longer cared.
“Closer my friend. Join us.” the voice said, pausing in between each word and speaking slow.
Another voice trickled in, also calling to him. It was clear to him now it was coming from the large vessel. The voices became many, but the first was the clearest. Then a loud roar filled the cavern from behind Lepus. He opened his eyes the liquid was a bright white, and his hand was an inch from touching it directly. Lepus stepped back, pulling his hand to his chest. From behind him, heavy steps thudded towards him, circling around the outside of the clearing. Turning to look, Lepus saw the dragon gracefully sulked, circling the shards. Lepus pulled the sword from the dirt, shaking with shock. The dragon bowed its head at Lepus, then continued to circle the pooled liquid.
Lepus rubbed his eyes, “I… I” he stuttered, trying to clear his mind of the voices and pick a question from the many he had to throw at the dragon. His head felt muddled and cloudy. As he did a chuckle came from behind him. He didn’t need to turn as the scorpion scurried in front of him. Also circling the clearing, but in the other direction, ensuring he did not come close to the dragon. It matched the dragon’s every movement, except that it moved much faster. With restless, erratic movements. Every now and again moving in the opposite direction and then back. It whirled its tail around above its body and snapped its claws.
Lepus got down on one knee hoping, if the scorpion and the dragon leapt at each other, he would be able to jump out of the way. He tightened his grip on the sword, holding it with both hands. Pointed at the scorpion’s lashing tail. Standing up on its two hind legs. The scorpion cackled.
“So then… what lies as this old thing been telling you sport?” Its voice was playful but mocking. It didn’t have much of an face. Just two beady eye buried beneath its shell. Black little things. The scorpion voice was full of personality, though. More than enough to make up for its lack of facial expressions. It was made that much more disconcerting because it didn’t have a face. All its words seemed like a lie told on behalf of the scorpion, although the noise came from its silky mouth. Its voice was certainly charming, though. If Lepus hadn't been trying to focus on its talons and tail, he would have been very relaxed around it.
“You seem like a clever chap,” it said, back on all legs, “I don’t think that sword much suits you. Bit old fashioned, swords, ey?”
“The crow!” Lepus barked, ignoring it’s chattering.
“Yes?” It said, moving its claws in front of its face, clamping them gently. “What of it?”
“Is it alive?” he said.
“You know… that bird isn’t all roses and sweets my chum, quite the vicious thing. Bit of a show I’ll bet she put on for you! This one!” it said waving its tail at the dragon, “Sent it to cosy up to you.
“Is it alive?” Lepus said with a flat commanding tone. He moved towards the scorpion. Both the scorpion and the dragon still circled back and forth.
“She’s a war criminal. I just think you should know
, that’s all,” it said, widening its massive claws. “But I don’t know how she is. I was worried about you, my friend. I left her once you were out of her clutches. She might have flapped on her merry way. But don’t you think she should stand trial?! If you knew what she’d done, oh the things. Naughty girl. I hope the proper authorities found her; that’s all I’m saying. Seems fair you see. You seem like a chap with his head on right, hey? You’ve got a good handle on things. What’s right and wrong, don’t cha know.”
Lepus could almost hear the smirk in its voice, despite the slippery critters expressionless face. “Shut up, just shut up!” Lepus called out, “You’re lying, and I saw what you did! Your minions everywhere. What do you want!? Either of you! Where am I?!” Lepus yelled, pointing the sword at them respectively.
“Oh me oh my! So many questions, my wily friend. What a little detective you are! You must Miss come terribly, all you need to worry your head about is that you’ve helped return something stolen to its rightful owner. You've done a stand-up job bringing me back my sword. It’s very precious to me. A family heirloom! You shouldn’t have had to worry about all this silliness, I do apologize!” it said movingto take the sword.
“Back!” Lepus yelled getting to his feet.
“Now you wouldn’t threaten little old me? I came to meet you and get back my property.” The scorpion babbled moving back.
“Little? You’re huge, and I saw you kill someone! … something, you know what I mean.” He said.
“I do declare my dear friend how confusing you are. You return my lovely grandmother's sword but then wave it dangerously in my face! I saved you from your avian captor, and you scold me! I certainly hope you come with an instruction manual my boy!” with this the scorpion started laughing at his own wit and curled itself over and onto its back, just to demonstrate how funny a joke it was.
Lepus was tempted to thrust his sword into its exposed belly. But the things rambling had started to fuzzy his thoughts in the last few days. He had never been violent to anyone or anything before. Always thinking himself a pacifist but not thinking he would ever be tested on that point. Yet here he was picking up guns, arraying words, considering pre-emptively striking down this strange creature just because it seemed to have nasty creepy minions. He lowered the sword, recalling that none of its minions had wanted anything more than the sword. They just hadn't gone about it in a particularly polite or even sane way. They had, however, made it a priority not to hurt him. Even the spiders had only mocked him. Or were they, were they even teasing or was it the strangeness of their voices? Lepus struggled to remember. Werethe cockroaches going to eat him before the bird massacred them? With this thought the dragon swept past his face, its tail almost knowingly out of the way. It pinned the scorpion where it lay.
***
Chapter 9
The Piano in the Kitchen
Lepus closed the cover of his exercise book as his stomach grumbled once more. He didn’t like the idea of having his work in the open for someone to read or take. So he tucked his books under his arm and walked to the kitchen.
While lunches, dinners, and breakfast were always served in the kitchen by the orderlies, there was always fruit in a big bowl in the middle of the kitchen. A fridge next to the roller door, which opened access to the canteen, was always packed full of sandwiches.
Lepus had locked it into his schedule to get a sandwich at 3pm every day.
He rested his hand on the fridge door handle and leaned in close to the glass.
His eyes darted around from one to another. Pickles and cheese, smoked ham and fennel. An endless selection. He leaned back pulling the door with him. Standing up straight it came open and in the same motion, he reached in and pulled out a ham, cheese, and tomato. The same as every other day.
Sitting at one of the tables he opened the packet and took out the sandwich. It was in triangles. Lepus started as always taking even bites out of each of the corners. Then started on the softest middle part of one square.
“Hello Lepus,” a voice came from across the table. He had been down and hadn't noticed the nurse sit down across from him. He was around Lepus’s age.
Blonde hair like Lepus’s too, but his was straight and slicked back. His uniform was straight and white. Freshly ironed by the look of it. His smile was intoxicating. Not intense or charming. Just calm and inviting.
As if when he was around there was little to worry about. He said little, but the way he spoke sounded almost pre-rehearsed. As if he’d said it a thousand times in a play on opening night. Said before in secret time and time again. But never to the audience for which it was intended.
Lepus cleared his throat. “Sorry, have we met?”
“Briefly, but you might not recall. I’ve not been around since you were first brought in. I’m sure you met many people that day.
“Oh, yes well I did. I’m sorry of call I don’t remember you. What was your name again?”
“Gareth”
Lepus nodded, not knowing what else to say. The thought as the nurse had started the dialog he should be the one to carry it. But he said nothing. This befuddled Lepus, and so they sat in silence. Lepus took a deep breath in and said, “Have ah… have you worked here long?” The man chuckled lightly.
“For a time yes.” He continued to look at Lepus.
“I’m going outside for a cigarette. Would you care to join me?”
“Aren’t nurses supposed to be healthy and notsmoke?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Um, okay.”
Lepus followed the man outside and, once they were sitting, both watched the sun go down. Lepus turned to him and said, “So what do you do when you’re not nursing?”
“Ha, nursing, brilliant,” he said leaning back in his chair. “Well I like to drive, I’m really into cars. I’ve got a Japanese import that I modded myself. I like to just drive out to the middle of nowhere, you know. Just be with my own thoughts, feel the speed and the open road.” He took a sombre drag and stared out at the sun as it disappeared behind trees of a distant park. Then finally behind the tall wall of the courtyard.
“Well,” he said turning back to Lepus, “I have to go now, there are some messages I need to get to the doctors” He smiled and floated off nonchalantly.
***
Lepus sat in an interview room. Opposite from a women who had previously been introduced to him as Doctor Katherine. A wide, smile on her face. A skinny lady, with muscular arms a kind warmth to her tone.
“So Lepus, I understand that you are no longer suicidal?” She said, calmly “but Brendon, tells me that you asked him for a razor blade?” she said with concern.
“No… I asked him if he could give me a shave. Because I know we aren’t allowedrazers? You know, for my beard, just a trim even?” Lepus scratched his blonde patchy beard with frustration.
“Ah, okay then, well, unfortunately, he has gone home, and that was in his report. So his wording may have been misleading, but that coupled with a complaint against you from yesterday which, despite the client's brain damage and extensive history of drug abuse, we must take with all seriousness. As such at this point, I have to deem your behaviour to be too erratic. We won't be taking you through to the next stage; I mean next facility. Ah sorry, a private hospital, as you requested.”
Lepus sighed long and hard. Thinking to himself Miriam, damn you. I should have just left you to your screams.
***
Lepus brushed his hair out of his face.
Turning on his side, he tried to keep his eyes closed tight, but they eased open. His body was so limp it felt like it was oozing into the bed, becoming a part of it.
Just not sleepy at all, the table next to his bed, invited him to read, listen to music, anything but sleep. He could sleep later. Just not sleepy at all, the table next to his bed, invited him to read, listen to music, anything but sleep. He could sleep later.
There was always time, there is always time, for reading. For breaking your pr
ecious schedule, for flying kites and eating cookies, he thought.
He opened his eyes wide and sighed with ease. It was so freeing knowing he had nowhere to be; He could sink into sleep, or stay up all night. In hospital, he was no slave to deadlines.
He loved his little oasis from life's little white empty room. Looking down at his hands, brushing the white and blue blankets around him to make sure they were flat. Everything in its place. He’d alwayshad been a bit of a pedant. Always attentive to the details of life. His brother had always maintained that’s why he made ‘such a good science type.' His athletic, tall, brunette older brother Brad, had always bulldogged him through life.
Lepus, always the quiet, reserved, type had had no quarrel with this. Brad would tussle his sandy blonde locks and jab him in the ribs. ’My little study bug.’
Raising his hands from the blankets, Lepus stared right into the cracks of his hands.
“Oh little atoms, what would I do without you.” He muttered.
He began to imagine, the spinning little wave particles, he had spent his life chasing. He had asked one of his friends once, a fellow student, if they ever just. Stared. Stared into space, “you know, wishing you were a particle, trying to watch them whirl around you,” he had asked.
“Um, ah… no, what do you mean Lepus?”
Lepus would sigh and look down, “Never mind.”
The small little hospital room faded away around him. He began to imagine a strand of his soft Blonde hair floating to the sheets. Past an infrared light wave, down to a little piece of his DNA Lying on the bed. Then he could see small water molecules, towering over atoms, circling dancing protons. Then Quarks, preons, neutrinos, quantum foam, and open strings touching all his body.
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