“Hi,” she whispered into his ear and then kissed his neck. She couldn’t hold on tight enough.
“How are you?”
“Better now.”
“Me, too.” Jake tightened his hold and she swayed in his arms.
“I didn’t know you were coming over.”
“I wasn’t sure I was. I thought you might want some time alone with your family.”
“No, this is better.” Clover knew Jake didn’t count as family yet, but he soothed her in a way they never could. The way she felt about him went beyond friendship, and was deeper than the few weeks they’d spent together should afford.
“Want to go for a drive?”
Clover smiled. That didn’t sound like Jake had a plan beyond being with her, and that suited her very well.
“Sure. Your car or mine?”
Jake laughed, but it sounded more tired than joyous. “Mine.”
Clover led him to the driver’s side door. She almost had him get in first, just to remind him how the summer had started. They’d come so far in such a short period of time, but she finally realized that she’d been building a foundation for loving Jake since she was ten years old. “Can we go to the pond?”
“Absolutely.” Jake helped her into the cab. Not that she needed it, but his hand felt nice against her waist as he held her steady.
She rode with his hand clasped between hers and her head on his shoulder. Her car was definitely nicer, but the way they fit together in his truck suited her better.
When they got to the pond, Jake turned off the truck, but made no move to get out. They sat like that and watched the sun go down. They hadn’t brought anything to start a fire and, this time of year, the mosquitoes were thick by the water. When Jake reached to start the truck to leave, Clover put her hand over his to get him to stop. She wasn’t ready to head back yet.
“I want you to come to Portland with me.” She hadn’t realized she was going to say it until the words were already out. Like the first time he’d said he loved her, the words felt right. She knew before he answered that he would say yes.
Jake squeezed her hand and said, “What about your roommate?”
“At this point, I’m pretty sure she’s going to bring a scuba instructor home with her.”
Jake turned until he could look into her eyes. “Seriously?”
Clover shrugged. Lexy would understand. “It’ll be okay with her. We’ll work it out.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.” Clover searched for the words to explain that the only way she could go was with him. All her thoughts about hating herself if she didn’t finish what she started just didn’t matter anymore. She needed Jake more than she needed her Master’s. But she also didn’t see why she had to choose. He could easily switch schools. Portland had a community college, too.
“You know I’m going to be in school for a while, at least three more years to finish my Bachelor’s.”
Clover kissed Jake because she couldn’t wait another minute. He was trying to talk her out of it because he didn’t want to hold her back and she thought it was adorable. But she didn’t need him to make her decisions for her. She wanted him with her. If he didn’t want the same thing, then she’d have to accept it. That wasn’t the case here. He wanted her just as badly as she wanted him. She was certain of it.
“Why are you trying to change my mind?”
“I just want to make sure you know what you’re asking for.”
“I’m asking for you, Jake. I’m asking for the way you make me feel, like I really matter. You see me. Not my dad’s money. Not my test scores. Me. And I don’t ever want to give that up.”
“But what will that look like? You finish your Master’s and you get some important job. How do you explain your boyfriend who is still struggling to pay his way through community college?”
Clover laughed. Jake was so sincere, so beautifully concerned about appearances. She didn’t care about any of that.
“First, you’d have moved on to a university at that point. Second, there’s a really good chance that I’ll go to law school. That means I have at least four more years of school in front of me. That’s one more than you.” Clover would finish her Master’s at the same time that Jake finished his Associate’s. They could figure out their next move from there. There were plenty of options that would allow him to finish his Bachelor’s while she worked on her law degree. They probably wouldn’t be at the same school, but they would be in the same city. That was enough.
“Really? Law school?” Jake shook his head. “You really are smart, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, I really am.” She held his face in her hands. “Smart enough to know we belong together.”
“I guess I can’t argue with that.”
“You really can’t.”
“Okay, Portland it is.”
All the fear that Clover had been fighting down, combined with the sadness she felt every time she looked at the calendar, fell away with Jake’s words. She no longer had to count the days until she left because now Jake would be going with her.
“Promise?” she asked, just because she wanted to hear him say it again, not because she didn’t believe it.
“I’d go anywhere to be with you. Portland isn’t very far at all.” Jake regarded Clover, his eyes full of hope and love. “You and me, Clover. I promise.”
Chapter 40
One Year Ago
Jake rolled his last pair of jeans and stuffed them into the large canvas bag he’d picked up at the Army surplus store. It was perfect for carrying his stuff to his aunt’s house and back. He zipped it up and carried it out to his truck. He wasn’t leaving for another hour or so, but putting it in his truck made him feel that much closer to leaving Salem.
His parents were in the kitchen arguing about a credit card bill. Apparently his mom had gone on a shopping spree that his dad knew nothing about. Until the bill came. Jake sidestepped the kitchen entrance and headed around the house to the back deck. A few years ago, he’d set up a makeshift home gym in the basement. When weather allowed, he moved the equipment to the back deck. He had enough time fit in a quick workout.
Jake was halfway through his routine when the yelling from the kitchen got loud enough to be heard over the song playing on his iPod. Jake turned the volume up a little more and went back to his presses. Last week, he’d hit a personal high of 220 on the bench press, but he didn’t try to move that kind of weight as part of his regular routine. He wanted to be healthy, not a meathead.
When his dad slammed the back door hard enough to shake the house, Jake rested the bar on his chest and looked at his dad. He evaluated his father, trying to decide if he should leave or if his dad was just passing through.
“What the hell are you staring at?” his dad yelled and Jake realized half a second too late that he just should have left.
“Nothing.” Jake pushed the barbell up to return it to the rack. He could head out a little early. His aunt wouldn’t mind if he showed up before she expected him.
“Nothing?” His dad’s voice bordered on screechy and his face was screwed up with anger. Jake had seen it enough times to know what came next and he wasn’t in a position to defend himself. Or get away. Panic edged into his chest and he tried to focus on breathing. He needed to stay calm.
Before he could get the bar into the frame, his dad rushed over to him and pressed the bar down against his chest. “What do you mean nothing? Do I look like nothing to you?”
The pressure against Jake’s chest made it impossible to catch his breath and the panic spread until all he could hear in his mind was the constant refrain of “run, run, run.” He needed to get away before his dad seriously hurt him.
Jake pushed up as hard and as fast as he could. His dad flew backwards and crashed against their patio table. Jake stood with the barbell in his hand. He sucked in deep breaths, trying to calm his body. He couldn’t stop shaking.
“You little shithead.” His dad charged a
t him again and Jake pushed him away a second time. The table tilted sideways, then crashed to the ground. A section of it broke off.
Before his dad could get back up, Jake threw the barbell to clear his hands. It smashed into a spare piece of three-quarter inch plywood on the other side of the yard and busted a hole in it. The barbell hung half out of the plywood.
“Enough!” Jake yelled. “No more, Dad.” He fisted and released his hands over and over.
His dad sagged against the ruined table. The energy drained from his body and he brought his hands up to his face. He sobbed, his body rising and falling with emotion.
Jake turned around and left. He didn’t say goodbye to his parents.
Chapter 41
Present Day
It felt like Jake had been waiting his whole life for Clover. He was scared to move to Portland, but he’d been scared the first summer he came to his aunt’s. Now he was scared to go home to his parents. He was also scared to stay here. Clover made him want to be brave. She made him believe that they could make it work. Her belief made him believe.
There was nothing romantic about the setting. The front seat of his truck was not an ideal place to show Clover how much he cared about her, and he felt like an ass for even thinking about it after the day she’d had. Still, the desire to be with her overwhelmed him. All he could think about was how beautiful she was and how she deserved to be loved like a princess.
When he kissed her, he wasn’t sure how far they would go. But when she opened her mouth to him, he slid his tongue inside without thinking. And when she moaned and pulled him onto her as she laid back, he knew that this time they wouldn’t stop.
Clover was soft and supple beneath him, her body inviting him to take her. He pulled away for a moment and simply stared at her. She cupped his face in her hands and her thumbs traced a restless pattern on his cheeks. She pulled him back down to kiss her. Clover’s lips tasted like forever, like she was the only certain thing in his life, and he kissed her greedily. He wanted to consume every last bit of her.
She pulled away with a gasp. “Help me with this.” She struggled to get her arms out of the sleeves of her sweater and he pulled at one end until it came off and fell away.
She reached for her tank top next, but he placed his hands over hers to still her motion. She was moving desperately and, while he understood her urgency, he wanted to slow this down and savor every moment. “Let me.”
Clover swallowed and nodded. She lifted her hands over her head and let them rest against the armrest on the door. They were too cramped in this tiny space, but the look in her eyes as he spread his palms over her waist and pushed the shirt up and off told him it was perfect. She held herself up so he could reach around and loosen the clasp on her bra. He removed it and dropped it to the floorboard of his truck along with her shirt.
Jake stared at her breasts. They were large enough to fill his hands, yet firm without sagging to the sides. She wouldn’t always look like this, he knew, but he would love her no matter what she looked like. Right now, with her laying open to him, was a gift. He wanted to treat it as such. He reached out to touch her, then stopped before he made contact. He wanted to touch her so bad, but not without her permission. He licked his lips and forced himself to look into her eyes. “May I?”
“Yes.” Clover took his hands in hers and guided him to touch her. She stared into his eyes until his hands closed over her breasts. When he squeezed gently, her eyes fell closed and she arched into him.
He massaged her breasts, gathering them into his hands and holding them firm, then releasing only to do it all over again. He swiped his thumbs over her nipples and she gasped. With every soft gasp and gentle moan, Jake grew harder. He strained against his pants until being confined bordered on painful. He didn’t want to go too fast. He wanted to go slow, to cherish every second of this encounter, but his cock had a vastly different idea.
He ignored the throbbing for now and lowered his mouth to Clover’s breast. He licked her nipple just to feel it harden beneath his tongue, then he sucked it into his mouth. Her body arched hard against him until she was pressed up into him and his arms were wrapped tight around her back, drawing her even nearer. She grasped his head and held him close to her, begging him to suck harder.
“Please, Jake,” she gasped.
He released her breast with an audible pop and her body sagged back into the truck. He switched sides and she drew instantly tight against him the moment he pressed his lips to the tip. He sucked her deep into his mouth, pulling hard on her nipple because he loved the way it made her squirm and plead for more.
When he scraped his teeth gently against her, her hips bucked up, humping against his thigh. He liked that. A lot. He did it again just to see what would happen. She thrust against him urgently and pulled him up into a kiss. “Stop teasing me. God.”
“Never.” He loosened the button and zipper on her shorts and slid his hand inside. There wasn’t enough room and his hand was cramped and twisted sideways in the tight space, but when he felt her wetness he couldn’t stop long enough to remove her shorts. “God, Clover. So wet.”
“Yes.” She gripped his shoulders, her fingernails digging in hard enough that he could feel the sharp edges through his shirt. She thrust against his hand, urging him deeper.
He teased her clit, his fingers slipping uselessly. He focused his motions, circling lightly without applying pressure. He wanted inside her in the worst way, but not like this. First, he would make her come because he wanted to watch her face as she let go. Then he would enter her with his cock for the first time. His fingers wouldn’t be enough this time. He wanted to really, truly feel her.
Clover’s body drew tight and she shook with tension. She held herself still, her legs trembling as she bit her lip. She was so close, but he didn’t know what else she needed. She drew a long shuddering breath and pushed herself harder against his hand. Suddenly he knew. He bent his head to her breast and kissed one nipple, then the other gently. All the while he continued to circle her clit. When he sucked one nipple into his mouth, she gasped and bucked into his hand.
He didn’t stop until she pushed against him, urging him to stop. “No more. I can’t.”
He tweaked his finger and she shuddered in a way that said she very well could come again if he wanted her, too. First, though, he wanted to be inside of her. He kissed her softly as he removed his hand. It was coated with her essence and he wanted desperately to taste her. He sucked his fingers into his mouth and licked until his tongue was coated with her.
“Condoms?” She asked the question as she watched him lick her come from his fingers.
“Oh yeah.” He undid his pants and pushed them down to his knees. There wasn’t room for anything else and he didn’t want to waste any more time. He pulled his shirt over his head as she pushed her shorts and underwear down and off. When she let her legs fall open, he couldn’t get the condom from his pocket fast enough.
“I’ll do it.” Clover took the package from him and tore it open with her teeth. She slipped it over his cock and rolled it down his length.
“The guy at the store said you might want lube.” He felt his face flush red as he spoke, but Clover was more important than his pride. He would rather be embarrassed than risk hurting her.
Clover laughed. “Do I feel like I need lube?” She slipped her fingers between her legs and drew them back covered in wetness. She pressed them to his lips and he licked them clean. Her come tasted better on her fingers than on his own.
He positioned himself at her opening, his cock throbbing to be inside her. “Are you ready?”
She nodded and arched her hips up letting the head of his cock slip into her. She gasped and pulled him down into a kiss. He thrust forward and entered her with his cock and his tongue at the same time.
He stopped after he slid fully into her. He closed his eyes and tried to catch his breath. He knew she’d feel good, but he hadn’t been prepared for this. His cock throbbed, p
ulsating in time with the pounding of his heart. He was dangerously close to coming and all he’d done was bury himself inside her. She felt perfect.
“You okay?” She touched his face tenderly.
“Yes,” he answered through gritted teeth. “Just give me a second.”
When he was sure he could move without orgasming, he eased back. He paused for a moment, then thrust forward again.
She groaned when he bottomed out. “So good.”
He held himself still again, taking a moment to let his body calm. “I can’t last long.”
“Me, either. Just…” Clover thrust against him, burying him even deeper. “Please.”
“Okay.”
He thrust into her over and over, grunting as he tried not to push too hard. Sweat rolled down his body, more from trying to be gentle than from exertion.
“Stop holding back.”
“Are you sure?” Jake was barely in control of his motions. The need to come overwhelmed his senses.
“Jake, I want you. Harder, please.”
He stopped holding back. She didn’t want him to and his body wouldn’t let him for much longer anyway. He thrust until all he could feel was his cock throbbing inside her and her walls clenching around him. When she drew tight, her eyes closed and head thrown back, Jake thrust into her as hard as he could, then released. He felt the orgasm building low in his belly, tightening in his balls until he came with shout.
“God, Clover.” He called out her name as his body shuddered and expelled all the tension that had gathered in his cock. He twitched inside of her and fell limp on top of her body. He pulled out before he grew completely weak and she whimpered.
He gathered her into his embrace and kissed her temple. “I love you, Clover.”
She returned his kiss, the urgency replaced by tenderness and affection. “I love you, too, Jake.”
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