by Tamara Gill
Kenzie blinked away the sting of tears as Ben galloped toward Castle Ross. She looked about and smiled at the few farmers who cast inquisitive glances her way. That they’d noticed her and Ben’s argument was obvious by the uncomfortable looks they gave her in return.
She walked back over to where they had eaten lunch and packed up the small pack of food and drink before going over to where her horse was grazing and putting it into her saddle bag.
Lifting her leg, she managed to get her foot in the stirrup and get up on the saddle. Now, all she had to do was get back to the castle without getting lost. From here, she could just make out the roof of the structure, so she shouldn’t have too much trouble, as long as no one tried to kill her along the way.
Medieval Scotland was a lot different to her own time. As she rode her horse, a placid mare who didn’t like to exert herself too much, Kenzie thought over what Ben had said. That he was angry with her was expected, but she had never given thought to what she would have done if they were attacked when she was here.
Kenzie had just assumed…well she didn’t know what she’d assumed, but it was stupid no matter what it was. She had come back to seventeenth century Scotland to find out what happened at Castle Ross and Ben on that fateful day in May. She would have to be here to see it.
And that in itself put her in danger. Not that she couldn’t get herself out of this time in minutes, but still…
“Returning to the castle are ye, lass? Where’s the laird?”
Kenzie started at the sound of Evan Grant as he pulled up alongside her. He was a big man, tall and as strong as Ben, but where pleasure coursed through her veins when near Ben, with Evan, her blood ran cold.
There was something about the man she did not trust or like. He was as off as food that was left out in the sun too long.
“He had to return before me.”
Evan raised his brow, his gaze traveling over her salaciously. The inspection left her uncomfortable, and she frowned. “What brings you out and about? I didn’t see you helping with the planting today.”
“Was that where you were? Ye do know that ladies do not work in the fields like common farm hands. They’re to breed our children and ensure our meals are hot, as well as our beds.”
Kenzie laughed. It was either that or smack the man over the head with his own caveman club. “I see you think highly of women.”
The oaf didn’t pick up on her sarcasm and merely narrowed his eyes. “Not particularly. Although I do care for my sister and that is where you and I cross swords, in a manner of speaking.”
“Oh. How so?” she asked, knowing her presence here had ruined all their plans. Or maybe it was her presence here that had ruined Ben. She started at the thought. Could it be her that caused his demise?
She wasn’t sure, but with time travel, anything was possible. Perhaps she had returned to this time and was the reason behind Ben’s death by whoever this unknown assailant was.
“Ye are a very fetching young lass, Kenzie. Are ye looking for a husband of ye own? I have not settled down as yet, and ye look the type who’d give me strong sons.”
Kenzie choked on her own shock. She cast Evan a glance. He was deadly serious. Again, a chill raced down her spine, and she was sorry for whoever it was who ended up with him. Something told Kenzie that he would be a hard and possibly cruel husband.
“I’m not interested, sorry. I’ll be returning home soon, in any case.” Kenzie threw a half smile at him, trying to butter her reply, but he didn’t fall for it and scowled.
“Yer too good for me then, is it, lass? Ye can warm the bed of the Laird of Ross, but not the future laird of Clan Grant? ’Tis insulting.”
Kenzie glared at the man. How dare he be so crude and vile?
“It’s also insulting that you’d say such a thing to me. If the Laird of Ross were here, would you be so honest in your opinions on what children I could birth you and how well I’d warm your bed?”
“’Twould be wise of ye to consider my offer. I think ye shall find that the laird and my sister will form an attachment, at some point, mayhap not as strong as the one between Ben and Aline, God rest her soul, but strong enough to tie the two families together once more. ’Tis only right that we have a voice in the upbringing of Alasdair.”
His words gave Kenzie pause. “I thought that was why you were here now. To renew your friendship and blood ties without marriage. You’ve certainly not mentioned this desire to the laird as yet and you’ve been here some weeks now. Or is there a different reason for your stay at Castle Ross?”
To kill the laird when opportunity strikes?
“Nay, you’re right, and we’d be sorely disappointed should someone come between our plans. Athol will take Aline’s place, and you shall leave or marry me with very little fuss.”
Kenzie’s temper snapped. “Oh, I’m leaving soon enough, but I won’t be marrying you, Evan Grant. I don’t think we’d suit at all.” If the man wanted a woman who’d cook, clean, and practically wipe his ass, she was most definitely not the woman for him.
“’Twould also be welcome if ye let Athol and Laird Ross spend some time with each other, without you as a distraction. I know the laird has taken a liking to ye, but if ye think you’re any different from the many other whores who’ve graced his bed, ye are fooling yourself.”
Jealousy coursed through her veins. Jealousy that was misplaced, since this thing, whatever this thing was between her and Ben was only short term. And damn the man, but he was right. Had she not come here, not just to this time, but to Castle Ross, Ben may have fallen for Athol, and they may have made some sort of future together.
Maybe it was her being here that killed him.
The thought filled her with dread, and she fought not to be sick. What have I done?
They arrived back at the castle together, not without a few odd looks from the guards at the gate or those who patrolled the battlements. Kenzie dismounted quickly and went inside to seek out Ben. She had to talk to him, make him forgive her, talk to her about what they could do to keep him alive. She hated the fact that he was angry with her.
But in all truth, she deserved it. She’d let him down.
Kenzie checked the solar but found it empty, along with the great hall. She took the stairs as quickly as she could, some of them not as high as the others, which made going up at a fast pace awkward.
The door to her room stood open, and walking past, Kenzie spied her maid sitting in the chair before the fire, mending the hem of the dress she’d managed to step on the day before.
Coming up to Ben’s quarters, she knocked once, twice on the double wooden doors but heard no welcome response. Peeking inside she frowned when this room was empty also. Where was he?
The thought that maybe he’d not returned or had been hurt on his way back here had her turning and running down the corridor only to slam into a wall of muscle as she reached the top stairs step.
“Oomph,” she said, reaching out to steady herself on his chest. He was a step or so below her and Ben was still as tall.
“What are ye running from, lass? Ye could’ve fallen and hurt yourself.”
The chastisement after their earlier fight did nothing to lessen the panic clawing at her conscience. For the few weeks that they’d been here together, living as she would suspect a husband and wife would, she’d grown to care for this wonderful medieval man.
Never did she wish anything to happen to him. Once, he may have just been an image in a painting she’d wondered about. Who was he? Was he ever happy? What was his life like? What happened to him? But now? Now, the thought that he was only weeks from death left her raw and reeling.
She loved him.
“I’m looking for you. When I couldn’t find you in your room, or anywhere in the castle, I worried that you’d been attacked on the road back to the castle.”
He ran a hand through his ebony hair, leaving it standing on end. “I was looking for you, lass. I shouldn’t have left ye on yer own.
I left ye unprotected and I’m sorry for it.”
Kenzie sighed. “We need to talk. Let’s go to your room.”
Ben nodded and strode up the passage, Kenzie beside him. How was it possible that just being beside him, feeling his strength and power, left her breathless and set her heart to pound? Ben was no longer “just a little fun” while she was visiting the past. In the short time she’d known him, he’d become one of the most important people in her life.
They entered his chamber and the key in the lock clicked loudly. Kenzie stood before the fire, wanting its warmth just in case what Ben was going to say left her cold.
“I was angry with ye. Actually,” he said with a thinning of his lips, “I’m still angry with ye. I want to know why ye came back to my time? What did ye expect to achieve?”
Kenzie swallowed, choosing her words carefully. “I wanted to meet Gwen and Braxton, as you know. But I also wanted to meet you, if possible. I wanted to see Castle Ross, what it was like and how it worked before hundreds of years took its toll on the building.”
“Not to mention a fire, if what ye say is true.”
“Yes, that’s right. In my time, Castle Ross is a ruin.” Kenzie sat on the chair, folding her hands in her lap. “Ben, no one knows what happens to you or who did it. Originally, I came back to find out who it was, to solve the mystery that has haunted my family for generations. No one would believe me if I returned home with all the facts pertaining to your death and the destruction of this castle, but I had to know for myself. Maybe with research I could’ve solved your murder.”
“And now?” He stood by the door, having not moved. His gaze was hard, hurt, and she hated that she’d done that to him.
“Now, I want to stop it from happening. The last thing I ever wished is for you to be hurt. For something to happen to Alasdair or your home you love so much. I didn’t think.” She swallowed, trying to find words. To voice her thoughts and feelings, some of which she’d never thought to say aloud.
“What. Didn’t think what, lass?” His voice washed over her, commanding, but with a thread of need, of wanting to know what she thought.
“I never thought that I’d fall in love with you.” Kenzie met his gaze. Never had she been so exposed. Her heart was before a pointy dagger and Ben could either remove the threat, save her, or pierce her stone dead.
What will he do?
…
Ben had never thought to hear such words uttered to him. Aline certainly had never loved him, although they’d cared for each other a great deal. It was never this soul consuming joy that coursed through him at her words.
Once, he’d thought such emotions only made a man weak, soft even, but not anymore. Having the love from such a strong-willed, intelligent, kind woman only made a man even more strong. “Come here, lass.”
She all but ran across the room and threw herself into his arms. Having her against his chest was right, exactly where she should be. Ben breathed deep the scent of roses that wafted from her hair, kissing her temple.
“I’m sorry, lass.”
She pulled back, the soft pad of her finger against his lips stopping his words. “No. I’m sorry. I should’ve been honest from the day we met, even if saying such a thing would be hard to hear. And there is something else that I’ve thought of that worries me, Ben.”
He smoothed out the frown between her brows. “What else, Kenzie.”
“There hasn’t been any threat, and I’m worried that my being here has perhaps changed the course of that threat. Late May is when it happens, but what if it happens tomorrow? You’re not prepared when you could’ve been. Maybe my being here is the reason you’re killed. What if my coming back is actually what sparks your demise?”
Tears welled in her eyes and he pulled her against him, hating the pain in her eyes. “Lass, you’re thinking too much, reading and worrying about things that are not in our control. If God almighty has me marked for a date late in May to meet him, then that is what will happen, and nothing ye say or do will alter that.”
“We have to alter it. I cannot lose you.”
Ben paused at her words, rocking her a little. “Kenzie, you’re going to lose me either way. You’re not staying.”
She stilled in his arms, as if his words brought her back to sense. “I don’t want to go back.”
Her words, muffled against his shirt were almost inaudible, but he heard them as if they were shouted across the room. “This isn’t ye time, nor do I wish it to be. As much as I care for ye, want ye to stay. I’ll not allow it. The world in which ye come from sounds as magical as you are. A place where ’tis easier to live, a place where ye have family and friends waiting for ye. Here ye have a man that loves ye as much as I fear you love him, but nothing else. ’Tis not enough.”
Kenzie looked up at him, her eyes wide and as emerald as the grass on the Highland mountains. “You love me, too?”
Och, he loved her. Would miss her to the day he died with a fierceness beyond anything he’d ever known. How he would go on once she left was anyone’s guess, and he would forever wonder if she’d return. Come and see him again. If he survived the attack in May that was due to happen. If history was indeed set in stone.
“Aye, I love ye. Too much to put into words.”
“How will I live without you? I don’t want to.” A tear dropped down her cheek and he wiped it away with his thumb, cupping her face to look at him.
“’Tis a burden we’ll both bear.”
…
He kissed her then and Kenzie was lost. To be in his arms was where she belonged, and she couldn’t face not living in a world where he did not. He was everything to her, and she couldn’t lose him now. Not after she’d just found him.
Coming back to seventeenth century Scotland was not where she’d expected to find love. Nor had she been looking for it. She was young, she had a business to run, and a huge renovation project to look after. She had not thought that falling in love with a medieval Highlander would make her question her life, what was important to her. But Ben did that.
He made her question everything.
Ben stripped her of her gown and chuckled when he spied her trews hidden underneath. He picked her up and carried her to the bed, laying her down. He pulled off her leather boots, untied the cord holding her trews in place, and drew them off, throwing them onto the floor to the growing pile of clothing.
Kenzie watched as he untied his sporran and kilt, those, too, falling to the floor with a swish. She sat up, pulling off her shirt and the light shift beneath, exposing herself to him. The breath in her lungs expelled when he did the same, the corded muscles on his abdomen flexing with each movement. He was so strong, a magnificent Highland warrior, and he was all hers.
Ben crawled up the bed and came to lay over her, hoisting her legs to sit about his waist. “I canna wait to have ye lass. Say you’ll let me have ye now.”
She nodded, heat pooling at her core as he undulated and teased her flesh. She wouldn’t deny him a thing.
Kenzie moaned as he slid into her, deep and sure. He filled her, made love to her with sweet, endless strokes that drove her to distraction. A perfect combination of pleasure and torture—much like their relationship.
Kenzie woke the following morning warm and snuggled under a multitude of animal furs, less the man she wanted to be beside. Somehow, she’d also managed to get back to her room. A small smile lifted her lips at the thought of Ben carrying her, trying not to be seen at the break of dawn.
The sound of wood being thrown onto the fire had her looking toward the mantle where she spied her maid, busy preparing the room for her. Kenzie sat up and stretched. “May I have a bath sent up this morning?”
The maid dipped into a curtsy. “Of course, m’lady. I’ll have one prepared straight away.”
Kenzie watched her go, not for the first time wondering what would happen to the people who lived here. Where did they go when Castle Ross came under siege from the unknown assailant? Were they killed
, driven off without the protection of a laird? Enslaved?
A little while later, the maid returned along with some male servants who set about pouring her bath with a multitude of buckets. Kenzie sat before the fire and asked one of the female servants to sit with her. The poor girl worked her hands in her lap, and Kenzie smiled, trying to calm her nerves.
“May I ask your name?”
“Of course, my name’s Beth, m’lady.”
“And Beth, do you like working here?” The woman’s eyes widened before she nodded.
“Aye, I do m’lady. I was the late mistress’ lady’s maid prior to her death, may she rest in peace. I’m a Ross myself, although many times removed from the laird. But this is my home, and I feel safe here.” The woman paused. “Am I in trouble, m’lady?”
“No,” Kenzie said, not wanting to scare the girl. “Not at all, but there is something that I need you to do over the next week, if possible.”
“Of course. Anything.”
Kenzie took a deep breath. “I need you to give me a list of all the families with children that reside under the care of Castle Ross. And I need to meet with them, not at the same time, but in groups, if possible.”
“Are they in trouble miss?”
“No, they’re not, and that’s exactly how I want it to stay.”
…
Kenzie was up to something. Ben stood at the battlements and for the fourth time that week he’d watched the woman, whom he’d die to protect, who he adored as much as his son, stride from the castle walls toward the small fishing village beyond his gates, her maid Beth, religiously in tow.
He shook his head, smiling a little at their business as Bruce came to stand beside him. “So, yer lass if off again on her mission.”
“Aye, and before ye ask me what she’s about, I do not know. I’d hoped she’d tell me when she was ready, but she has not.”
“Yer being very trusting. Are ye not the least bit curious what her and Beth are up to each day?”
Ben was more curious than he’d ever thought possible, but he wanted her to tell him when she was ready. But now, after four days, it was time he found out just what his lass was up to.
