by L. J. Smith
Love changes…
And you will always be alone.
Keller could tell where Galen was by the way his eyes widened in horror.
She smiled at him, not nicely, and took the paper back.
He looked at her. And despite everything she knew about him, she was surprised at the sheer depth of his shock. He stared at her with those gold-green eyes that went on for miles—and then he stepped forward.
“You don’t believe that,” he said fiercely, and grabbed her by the shoulders.
Keller was startled. He’d seen her in action. How could he be so stupid as to grab her?
He seemed to be completely unaware of his danger. There was nothing calm or hesitant about him now. He was staring at her with a kind of stricken tenderness, as if she’d just told him she had a terminal disease. It was as if he were trying to pour love and warmth and light into her by a direct connection.
“I won’t let you think that,” he said. “I won’t let you.”
“It’s just the truth. If you can accept that, you won’t drown in life. Whatever happens, you’ll be able to cope.”
“It’s not all the truth. If you believe it is, why do you work for Circle Daybreak?”
“They raised me,” Keller said shortly. “They snatched me out of the hospital nursery when they read the reports about me in the paper. They realized what I was and that humans couldn’t take care of me. That’s why I work for them—to pay them back. It’s my job.”
“That’s not the only reason. I’ve seen you work, Keller.”
She could feel warmth spreading from his hands on her shoulders. She knocked them aside and stood tall. There was a core of iciness inside her, and she hung on to that.
“Don’t get me wrong,” she said. “I don’t save people out of idealism. I don’t risk my neck for just anybody—only the ones I get paid for.”
“You mean if Iliana’s little brother was in danger, you wouldn’t save him. You’d stand there and watch him burn to death in a fire or drown in a riptide.”
Keller had a sinking feeling. She held her chin up and said, “Exactly. If it meant putting myself in danger to save him, I wouldn’t do it.”
He shook his head, flatly positive. “No.”
The sinking feeling got worse.
“That’s a lie,” he said, holding her eyes. “I’ve seen you in action. I talked to Nissa and Winnie last night. And I’ve seen your mind. You’re not just doing a job. You’re doing what you do because you think it’s right. And you are…” He paused as if to find the words, then spoke deliberately. “You are the soul of honor.”
And you’re insane, Keller thought. She really needed to get away now. The sinking was becoming a terrible weakness spreading through her. And although she knew that what he was saying was complete garbage, she couldn’t seem to stop listening.
“You put on a good show,” Galen said, “but the truth is that you’re brave and gallant and decent. You have your own code, and you would never break it. And anybody who knows you sees that. Don’t you know what your team thinks of you? You should have seen their faces—and Iliana’s—when they thought you were dead in that rubble. Your soul is straight as a sword, and you have more honor than anyone I’ve ever known.”
His eyes were the color of the first new leaves in spring, the kind you look up to see sunlight pouring through. Keller was a meat-eater and had never cared much about flowers or other vegetation, but now she remembered a line from a poem, and it froze in her mind like lightning: Nature’s first green is gold. This was the color the poet meant.
You could drown in eyes like that.
He was holding her arms again. He couldn’t seem to stop reaching for her, as if she were some soul in danger of being lost forever.
“Your life’s been so hard. You deserve to have good things happen to you now—only good things. I wish…” He broke off, and a sort of tremor went through his face.
No, Keller thought. I won’t let you make me weak. I won’t listen to your lies.
But the problem was that Galen didn’t lie. He was one of those idiot idealist types who said what they believed. And she shouldn’t care what he believed, but she found that she did. She cared terribly.
Galen just stood there looking at her with tears in his gem-bright eyes.
Something ripped inside Keller. And then everything changed.
Keller couldn’t understand what was happening at first. In panic, all she could think was that she was losing herself. Losing her armor, her hardness, everything she needed to keep alive. Some part of her deep inside was melting, flowing toward Galen.
She tried to snatch it back, but it was no good. She couldn’t stop it.
With a distant shock, she realized that she had shut her eyes. She was falling, falling—and she didn’t care.
Something caught her.
She felt the warmth of arms around her, supporting her. And she felt herself lean into it, relaxing, letting him take some of her weight, as if someone else were controlling her body.
So warm…
That was when Keller discovered something strange. That warmth could give you shivers.
Being close like this, feeling Galen warm and solid and there to hang on to—it made a shiver of pleasure go through her.
And then she felt the true connection.
It wasn’t a physical thing. The spark that passed between them connected them mind to mind. It was a riveting flash of complete understanding.
Her heart all but exploded.
It’s you. The voice was in her mind, the same voice she’d heard yesterday when he had tried to save her from the dragon. It was filled with wonder and discovery. It’s you…the one I’ve been looking for. You’re the one…
And Keller would have told him how insane that was, except that it was just what she was feeling herself. It was as if she had just turned around and unexpectedly found herself facing a figure from one of her dreams. A person she knew instinctively, just as she knew her own mind.
I know you, too, Galen’s voice in her head said. We’re so much alike…
We’re not, Keller thought. But the protest sounded feeble even to her. And trying to hang on to her anger and cynicism right now seemed silly—pointless. Like a kid insisting that nobody loved her and she was going to go play on the freeway.
We belong together, Galen said simply. Like this.
Warm tingles. Keller could feel the force of his love like a bright light shining at her. And she couldn’t…resist…any longer…
Her arms came up to hold Galen back. Her face turned up slightly, but not much, because she was tall, and their lips were already only an inch apart.
The kiss was shivery, delightful, and very sweet.
After an endless time of floating in a golden haze, Keller shivered again.
There’s something…something I have to remember…
I love you, Galen said back.
Yes, but there’s something I’ve forgotten…
We’re together, he said. I don’t want to remember anything else.
And that was probably true. She couldn’t really blame him. Who would want to disturb this warmth and closeness and quiet joy?
Still, they had been talking about something—a long time ago, when she had been alone. Something that had made her terribly unhappy.
I won’t let you be unhappy. I won’t let you be alone, either, he said.
He stroked her hair with his fingertips. That was all, but it almost short-circuited Keller’s thought processes.
But not completely.
Alone…I remember.
Her mother’s note.
You will always be alone.
Galen’s arms tightened around her. Don’t. Don’t think about that. Were together. I love you…
No.
With a wrench, Keller pulled herself away. She found herself standing in the library on her own two feet, staring at Galen. He looked shocked and stricken, as if he’d just been slapped out of a dream.
“Keller—”
“No!” she spat. “Don’t touch me!”
“I won’t touch you. But I can’t let you run away. And I can’t pretend I don’t love you.”
“Love,” Keller snarled, “is weakness.” She saw her mother’s note lying on the floor where he’d dropped it and snatched it up. “And nobody is making me sentimental and weak! Nobody!”
It wasn’t until she was out the door that she remembered she had left out the strongest argument of all.
He couldn’t love her. It was impossible.
He was destined to marry the Witch Child.
The fate of the world depended on it.
CHAPTER 8
Keller was tempted to check the wards, but she knew it wouldn’t do any good. She wasn’t sensitive enough to the witch energies to gauge them. They’d been put up by Grandma Harman and checked by Winnie, and she would have to trust to that.
The wards were keyed so that only the Dominick family and ordinary humans could come inside. No Night Person could enter except Nissa, Winnie, Keller, and Galen. Which meant, Keller thought with a grim smile, that any lost witch relatives of Iliana’s mother who came by were going to get quite a surprise. An invisible wall was going to be blocking them from crossing the threshold.
As long as nobody on the inside removed the wards, the house was safer than Fort Knox.
Grandma Harman had also taken the limo, Keller found. Sometime during the night, it had been replaced by an inconspicuous Ford sedan parked at the curb. The keys had been in a manila envelope dropped through the mail slot in the front door, along with a map of Lucy Lee Bethea High School.
Circle Daybreak was efficient.
“I didn’t finish my hair,” Iliana complained as Nissa hustled her to the car, “It’s only half done.”
“It looks terrific,” Winnie said from behind her.
And the thing was, it was true. There was nothing that could make that shimmering waterfall of silvery-gold look anything less than beautiful. Whether it was up or down, braided or pinned or falling loose, it was glorious.
I don’t even think the little nitwit has to brush it, Keller thought. It’s so fine that she couldn’t make two hairs tangle if she tried.
“And I left my scarf—”
“Here it is.” Keller lassoed her. The scarf was ridiculous, crushed velvet in muted metallic colors, with a six-inch fringe. Purely decorative.
Iliana choked as Keller wound it around a few times and pulled it tight.
“A little aggressive, Boss?” Winfrith asked, extricating Iliana before she could turn blue.
“Worried about being late,” Keller said shortly. But she saw Nissa eyeing her, too.
Galen was the last to come out of the house. He was pale and serious—that much Keller saw before she shifted her eyes past him. Iliana’s mother actually remained standing at the door with the baby in her arms.
“Say bye-bye to your sister’s friends. Bye-bye.”
“Kee-kee,” the baby said. “Kee-kee!”
“Wave to him,” Winfrith stage-whispered.
Keller gritted her teeth. She half-waved, keeping her senses opened for any sound of an impending attack. The baby held out his arms toward her.
“Pui!”
“Let’s get out of here.” Keller almost shoved Iliana into the backseat.
Nissa took the wheel, and Galen sat up front with her. Winnie ran around to get in the back on the other side of Iliana.
As they pulled out, Keller saw the outside of the house for the first time. It was a nice house—white clapboard, two and a half stories, Colonial Revival. The street was nice, too, lined with dogwoods that would be a mass of white when they bloomed. The sort of street where people sat outside on their rockers in spring and somebody was bound to have a stand of bees in the side yard making sourwood honey.
Although Keller had been all over the United States, sent from one Circle Daybreak group to another, the hospital where she’d been found had been near a neighborhood like this.
I might have grown up someplace like this. If they’d kept me. My parents…
Do I hate her? Keller wondered suddenly. I couldn’t. It’s not her fault.
Oh, no, of course not, the voice in her mind said. Not her fault that she’s beautiful and perfect and has parents who love her and blue fire in her veins and that she is going to be forced, whether she wants it or not, to marry Galen…
Which I don’t care about, Keller thought. She was shocked at herself. When had she ever let emotion interfere with her job? She was allowing herself to be distracted—she had allowed herself to be distracted all morning—when there was something vitally important at stake.
No more, she told herself fiercely. From now on, I think about nothing but the mission. Years of mental discipline came in handy now; she was able to push everything to the side and focus with icy clarity on what had to be done.
“—stopped a train in its tracks,” Winfrith was saying.
“Really?” There was faint interest in Iliana’s voice. At least she’d stopped talking about her hair, Keller thought.
“Really. It was one of those BART trains in San Francisco, like a subway train, you know. The two girls were on the tracks, and the Wild Power stopped the train dead before it could hit them. That’s what the blue fire can do.”
“Well, I know I can’t do anything like that,” Iliana said flatly. “So I can’t be a Wild Power. Or whatever.” The last words were tacked on quickly.
Nissa raised a cool eyebrow. “Have you ever tried to stop a train?”
While Iliana bit a fingertip and pondered that, Winnie said, “You have to do it right, you know. First, you have to make blood flow, and then you have to concentrate. It’s not something you can expect to do perfectly the very first time.”
“If you want to start practicing,” Nissa added, “we can help.”
Iliana shuddered. “No, thank you. I faint when I see blood. And anyway, I’m not it.”
“Too bad,” Nissa murmured. “We could use the blue fire on our side today.”
They were pulling up to a charming old brown brick high school. Neither Galen nor Keller had said a word throughout the ride.
But now Keller leaned forward. “Nissa, drive past it. I want to check the layout first.”
Nissa swung the car into a circular driveway that went past the school’s oversized front doors. Keller looked right and left, taking in everything about the surroundings. She could see Winnie doing the same thing—and Galen, too. He was focusing on the same danger spots she was. He had the instinct for strategy.
“Go around the block and circle back,” Keller said.
Iliana stirred. “I thought you were worried about me being late.”
“I’m more worried about you being dead,” Keller interrupted. “What do you think, Nissa?”
“The side door on the west. Easy to pull up reasonably close, no bushes around it for nasty surprises to hide in.”
“That’s my pick, too. Okay, everybody, listen. Nissa’s going to slow the car down in the right place. Slow down, not stop. When I give the signal, we’re all going to jump out and go directly to that door. We are not going to pause. We are going to move as a group. Iliana, are you paying attention? From now on, you don’t go anywhere unless Winnie’s in front of you and I’m beside you.”
“And where’s Galen?” Iliana said.
Keller cursed herself mentally. She wasn’t used to working with a fourth team member. “He’ll be behind us—okay, Galen?” She made herself look his way.
“Yes. Whatever you say.” There wasn’t the slightest hint of sarcasm in his face. He was dead serious. Absolutely miserable, earnest, and dead serious.
“And Nissa, once you’ve parked, you join us and take the other side. What room’s your first class in, Iliana?”
“Three twenty-six,” Iliana said dismally. “U.S. History with Mr. Wanamaker. He went to New York to try to be an actor, but all he got was some disease from n
ot eating enough stuff with vitamins. So he came back, and now he’s really strict unless you can get him to do his impressions of the presidents—”
“All right,” Keller broke in. “We’re coming to the door.”
“—and he’s actually pretty funny when he does Theodore Roosevelt—or do I mean the other one—”
“Now,” Keller said, and pushed her as Winnie pulled.
They all made it out smoothly, although Iliana yelped a little. Keller kept a good grip on her arm as they hurried to the door.
“I don’t think I like this way of coming to school.”
“We can turn right around and go back home,” Keller said. Iliana shut up.
Galen kept pace behind them, silent and focused. It was Nissa’s usual position when the team wasn’t heading for a car, and Keller couldn’t help feeling the difference. She didn’t like having someone behind her she couldn’t trust absolutely. And although the enemies didn’t seem to know yet that Galen was important, if they found out, he’d become a target.
Face it, she thought. This setup is a disaster, security-wise. This is a horrendous accident waiting to happen.
Her nerves were wound so tightly that she jumped at the slightest sound.
They shepherded Iliana to her locker, then up a staircase to the third floor. The halls were almost empty, which was exactly as Keller had planned it.
But of course that meant they were late for class.
Nissa slid in beside them just as they opened the door. They entered as a group, and the teacher stopped talking and looked at them. So did everybody else in the room.
Quite a few jaws dropped open.
Keller allowed herself a grim inner smile.
Yeah, they were probably a bit of a shock for a small town. Four Night People—well, former Night People, anyway. A witch who was almost as small as Iliana, with a mop of vivid strawberry-blond curls and a face like a pixie on holiday. A vampire girl who looked like cool perfection straight out of a magazine, with cropped mink-colored hair and a strangely penetrating gaze. A shapeshifter boy who could have taken the place of any prince in a book of fairy tales, with hair like old gold and classically sculptured features.
