“I want nothing from you,” she said with a haughty air.
“I see. You’ve simply taken the woman’s out and changed your mind.”
“Don’t patronize me, Colter,” she snapped, rushing toward him and suddenly stopping.
Colter watched her, his gaze shifting from the soft undulation of her hips to the lush swell of her breasts and then, with calculated assessment, to her lips. “I see you’ve donned armor.” Her look begged an explanation. “The widow’s weeds.”
“And perhaps, Colonel, you should have worn your saber. The cuts would be cleaner by far.”
Colter flashed her an exasperated look. But he couldn’t help admiring her recovered spirit; this woman was more like the Elizabeth he remembered.
“I didn’t come here to spar with you, Elizabeth. I admit that I questioned the truth of what you said. Upon reflection, I concede there is the possibility that she is my child.”
“You are far too kind, sir,” Elizabeth whispered with honeyed malice. “Pray, take a seat. I will see to some other refreshment for you, since brandy doesn’t appeal.”
“Oh, no, madam!” With lithe steps he was upon her, taking hold of her arm, hauling her gently but firmly to his side. “Play the belle with others, little fox, not me. Never again with me.”
“You damn blackguard!”
“I’ve never denied that.”
She looked up and stared at him. His lips tightened grimly. “Let me go, Colter. And then, I demand that you take your leave.”
“I want to see her. And before you think to disabuse me of the notion, I assure you it will take more than you are capable of, madam, to stop me.”
Incensed, Elizabeth could no longer hold her anger at bay. “You have no right to make any demands. I did not seduce you, Colter, and then abandon you. I was not the one who found fairer game within months of arriving in England, was I?”
“What the devil are you accusing me of? I never thought of you as game. What lies were you told? I found no other woman in England.”
“James told me—”
“James! Damn his soul to hell! What did he tell you?”
“Your cousin…he said you had offered marriage to a distant cousin. That the marriage would take place immediately, and that you would bring your bride—”
“He lied, Elizabeth. James lied to you.” With a sudden wrench, Colter understood. “And to me,” he added, easing his grip on her.
Elizabeth pulled herself free of him. “Lied?” she repeated, swaying where she stood.
“Yes. He lied when he told you that I found someone else to marry. Just as he lied to you about telling me of Nicole.” He raised his hand to touch her cheek, but Elizabeth backed away and he was forced to still his need to hold her.
“Tell me what happened,” she demanded in a whisper.
“I received a letter from James nearly five months after I left you. He claimed that you had agreed to marry him and wished for no further contact between us.”
“And you,” she snapped, “accepted his word without a thought of writing to me? How could you believe him after what we shared? How could you—”
“Just think! James and I were the best of friends. Why would I question him?”
Elizabeth softly moaned and wrapped her arms around her waist, as if to contain the emotions inside. “You never saw or heard from him again? He never…Will you swear to me that he never told you about my daughter?”
“You have accused me of much this day, but now you dare to impugn my honor to query the truth of what I tell you?”
“Your honor means little to me! Will you swear it?”
There was a rawness to her appeal that he couldn’t deny. “Yes, I swear it. James never told me about her. He never told me about any child.”
“All lies.” She could barely say the words.
The waste of the past four years struck Colter like a blow. Elizabeth’s whispered words defused his anger. She met his gaze directly, and before Colter spoke, he saw the defeat within her eyes.
“There’s more.”
“No. I don’t…I can’t hear—”
“James knew I loved you. He knew I intended to ask you to marry me when I returned from England.”
Elizabeth could not begin to measure her sense of betrayal. “You never made your intentions known. And now they do not matter. Hell, I hear, is paved with good intentions.”
Colter was not going to pursue the matter now. It was enough that he had found her again; nothing she did or said would shut him out.
“I want to see my daughter.”
“Be sure of what you are asking, Colter. I believe you need time. I know I do. I’ll send word of my decision.”
“You didn’t suffer from these lies alone.” He raked his hand through his hair, forcing himself to be patient.
She turned from him, then seemed to think better of the move and faced him once again. “Nicole is a sensitive child who has been uprooted from all she knew. I can’t have her hurt.”
Colter struck like lightning, grabbing her arms and hauling her against him. “Now. I won’t leave without seeing her.”
She searched the implacable set of his features and still found the courage to shake her head.
“Listen to me,” he stated, shaking her. “No mercy. You’ve twisted my life upside down today. And I—”
“What you want doesn’t matter. How can I make you understand?” she pleaded, pushing against his chest.
“Do you hate me so much, Elizabeth, that you believe I would hurt an innocent—”
“You forget, Colter, I was once an innocent, too.”
“Madam,” he stated coldly, releasing her as if he couldn’t bear to touch her, “it is you who now wields the saber.”
“Colter, I…” Elizabeth stopped herself from uttering any apology. It was better to let him remain angry than to give in to his demand. Living with Alma Waring had taught her to attack where someone was vulnerable. It wasn’t a pleasant skill to put into practice, however. She turned away from him, undecided about his seeing Nicole.
Her daughter took the decision from her.
“Mama! Mama!” Nicole shouted, running down the hall. “Mister Josh made a dolly! Look, with real lace drawers.” Nicole came to a sudden stop at the doorway. Clutching the doll to her chest, she stared at Colter. “He’s awful big.”
Elizabeth bit back a smile. She turned to share it with Colter and found him stunned at the sight of Nicole. Elizabeth tried to see her daughter as he did, her hair bow gone, her lilac sash untied and a streak of mud on one white stocking. Nicole’s eyes were rounded and Elizabeth could see the fear in them. She was about to lash out at Colter for frightening her, but his own gaze was filled with hunger and pleading.
The hunger frightened her. James had been an indifferent father at best. She never thought that Colter would care for Nicole or want more than merely to see her.
She hurried to Nicole and knelt before her. “Honey, I know he seems very big to you, but there is nothing to be frightened of. Colonel—”
“He won’t take me away.” Nicole wrapped her arms around her mother’s neck, clinging tightly.
“No, love. He’s not going to take you away.” Elizabeth eased her daughter’s hold until she could look at her. “Colonel Saxton is an old friend of Mama’s. I would like you to meet him. I promised you that no one would ever take you away from me, didn’t I?”
Nicole nodded and stole a look at Colter.
“Would you like to have some time?” Again the child nodded and Elizabeth glanced over at Colter. She forestalled his questions with a gentle shake of her head.
Colter watched while Nicole pressed her cheek to her mother’s. A raw ache spread inside him. He longed to take them both within the shelter of his arms, swearing protection and making promises he had no right to. But a rage also surfaced, rage that this child, his child, was afraid of him. Being unable to have his questions answered immediately added to his turmoil.
&nb
sp; To stand helplessly and watch while Elizabeth rubbed Nicole’s back, pressing tiny kisses to her temple and murmuring soft reassurances was a torment unlike any he had known.
Elizabeth finally rose, but Nicole’s face was still buried in her mother’s skirt. Smoothing her child’s curls, Elizabeth silently tried to convey how Colter should proceed.
Colter hunkered down so that his height would not be intimidating to Nicole. Elizabeth offered him an encouraging smile.
“If you peek, honey, you’ll see he’s not so big anymore,” she coaxed.
Colter smiled. The little girl was a miniature of her mother. She had the same delicate features and hair that was lighter in color but just as thick and glossy as Elizabeth’s. Nicole’s lower lip thrust forward as she peeked shyly at him from behind Elizabeth’s skirt. He couldn’t stop looking at her eyes—eyes the same green color as his own.
A glint of wonder brightened his gaze. Colter’s emotions churned, shimmered and coalesced into a feeling of love so new, so encompassing, that his eyes filled with the glimmer of tears. This tiny person was a part of him. In that moment she owned his heart, his soul and all that he silently vowed to give her.
Colter was overwhelmed by the need to touch her. He extended a hand toward her, a hand that shook slightly. “I’ve never met a princess before,” he whispered huskily.
“Silly. I’m not a princess.”
“To me you are. You’re certainly as pretty as one.”
Solemnly Nicole shook her head. “Mama is pretty. Not me.”
Colter withdrew his outstretched hand and cupped his chin. Nicole was still suspicious of him. Helplessly he sought a way to earn the girl’s trust. “I agree,” he said softly, after giving her announcement serious thought, “that your mama is lovely. But only a little girl as special as you can be a princess.”
“Special?”
“Very special.”
“A real princess?”
“You’ll always be a real one to me,” he answered with a smile.
Colter, entranced with his daughter, didn’t see Elizabeth wipe the tears from her eyes. She knew he was capable of being gentle and tender, but never had she witnessed him like this. If she had never loved him, she would now, she thought, locking this moment in time. This sensitive, patient side of him tore down all of the barriers she had carefully erected as protection. When Colter masked his disappointment that Nicole did not return his smile, Elizabeth felt his hurt as deeply as if it were her own.
She had not planned to interfere with them, but Colter deserved something from Nicole. With a gentle touch Elizabeth turned her daughter to face her. “I think a real princess would make a curtsy to a gentleman who offered her a compliment.”
Nicole hesitated and then stepped out from behind her mother’s skirt. Her little legs wobbled a bit, but she managed to make her curtsy. Lifting her head, she stared at Colter, then at the floor, swinging her body to and fro. “A real princess has a castle.”
“Why, yes, she does. And I’ll—”
“Colter,” Elizabeth warned, alarmed that he was about to promise her daughter a castle.
Helplessly Colter looked at her. What did Elizabeth expect from him? He knew nothing about children and even less about his own daughter. But when he again looked at Nicole’s face, she appeared to be waiting for him to finish.
“I’ll…I’ll find you one,” he promised in a lame voice. Her crestfallen expression told him he had somehow failed her expectations. This new feeling of tenderness for his daughter was overwhelming. He held back rash, impossible promises, but only with a great deal of effort and Elizabeth’s warning in mind. Glancing down to the doll Nicole still held, Colter was inspired.
“I will find you one that will be a perfect size for your doll. That way,” he added in a lighter tone, “you can both be princesses.”
Nicole gazed up at her mother, seeking her approval. Elizabeth managed a nod. She turned back to Colter and took several hesitant steps forward.
He held his breath, anticipation over the reception of his promise making his chest feel tight. That he would appear foolish to anyone who really knew him never entered his mind.
Timidly Nicole extended her hand to him. “My doll and me are pleased to be your princesses.”
Colter enclosed her tiny hand within his own and gently raised it to his lips. He closed his eyes, silently praying that he was worthy of this child, and savored the first touch of his daughter.
When he looked at her, she seemed oblivious to the emotional turmoil he was going through.
“You honor me, my dear.”
Elizabeth felt her heart constrict, but for her daughter’s sake she forced a joyful smile to match Nicole’s, then offered the same smile to Colter. Nicole began to giggle.
No praise for a job well done from his superiors could have pleased him more. He was lost, enchanted and thoroughly caught up in the spell of this little minx.
“When?” the child asked.
“Tomorrow,” he answered, vowing to turn Richmond upside down if need be to get her a castle.
“Nicole,” Elizabeth said, well aware that her daughter was not above extracting more from him if she could, “I think you should show your new doll to Rutha.”
“Ain’t a need, Miz Beth,” Rutha said from the doorway, startling the three of them. “I came to tell you that Miz Emily will join you.” With a look that could only be called disdainful, she stared at Colter.
Alarmed, Elizabeth asked, “Can’t you dissuade her?”
“Miz Emily’s got her mind set like them Yankees. She’s comin’ to see him.”
Elizabeth pushed past Rutha in the doorway to step out into the hall. Mister Josh’s soft tread and the thump of Emily’s cane warned her that time had run out. There would be no escape for Colter. Clasping her hands, she lifted her chin and walked back into the room, ignoring Colter’s bemused look.
He rose and faced the door. Colter stared first at the ebony cane embossed with a scrolled silver design. Something familiar about the cane begged him to remember where he had seen it before. Its tip was placed firmly on the floor, its dark gleam a contrast to the soft shade of rose cloth behind it.
With a rustle of crinolines and petticoats, Emily entered the room on Mister Josh’s arm.
Nicole ran toward her. “Miss Emily, he promised a castle for me! I’m a princess!”
“Not now, Nicole.” Elizabeth rushed to take her daughter’s hand, pulling her aside. She heard Colter’s sharp intake of breath and turned to him.
“Dear Lord, Elizabeth, do you know who this woman is?”
“Quite well, Colter,” she answered defiantly.
“That’s Lily—”
“No,” Elizabeth snapped, so angry with Colter that she forgot Nicole was in the room. “Her name is Emily and I am aware that she was my father’s mistress.”
Chapter Four
Colter was a soldier. He prided himself on being able to handle sudden shifts in battle, the sometimes unaccountable behavior of men under his command and the unexpected from the enemy. But this…he wasn’t quite sure how to react. He opened his mouth, ready to demand further explanations, but Elizabeth’s militant stance stopped him for the moment. With an audible gnashing of his teeth, he closed his mouth.
Rutha, having seen enough, took Nicole by the hand and motioned her husband, Josh, to leave. For once, Nicole left quietly with them.
“Pray be seated, Colonel,” Emily offered, slowly making her way into the room.
Elizabeth moved a needlepoint armchair closer to the sofa, knowing how painful it was for Emily to sit on the low furnishing. Unobtrusively she blocked Colter’s view as Emily sat down and settled herself, before she sat on the sofa nearby.
“Colter…” With a graceful gesture, Elizabeth motioned him to sit beside her.
“I’ll stand, if you don’t mind.”
“There’s no need to be snappish—”
“Elizabeth,” Emily chided, “remember that your col
onel has had quite a few shocks this day.”
“I’ve had a few myself, and he is not my colonel.”
“Be that as it may, I do believe the man is entitled to an explanation.”
Elizabeth glared at Colter, then turned away to stare at the fire. “And I don’t believe he is entitled to any more explanation from me than I wish him to have.”
“You can’t mean that, my dear.”
Meeting Emily’s gaze, Elizabeth knew the older woman was right but resented being obliged to reveal the sordid details of what brought her to Emily.
Colter moved to stand before Elizabeth, his legs spread, his hands clasped behind him. The look on his face was forbidding.
“If you will remember that I am not one of your soldiers, Colter, I will tell you how I came to be here.”
Not trusting himself to speak, Colter nodded curtly.
“I told you a little of why I was forced to make a decision to leave the Warings and—”
“Very little, I recall.”
“Let me tell this in my own way.” Clasping her hands together, Elizabeth looked up at his unyielding features. Praying for Colter to find a measure of patience, she continued. “You must simply accept my word that the situation became intolerable. Alma succeeded in cutting me off from the contact with the few friends I had, and those who remained were blind to what she was attempting to do. Without family to turn to, I despaired of escaping her.”
Elizabeth had to stop. She closed her eyes as if to shut out the memory of the desperation that marked those days. And the nights…the nights had been endless bouts with the fear that she wouldn’t survive to see the morning.
Colter’s need to know how his daughter came to be living with her grandfather’s mistress was suddenly tempered by his sensitivity to Elizabeth’s pain. He hunkered down before her, covering her hands with his. The chill of her skin alarmed him, and to his surprise, he found himself glancing at Emily for guidance.
A Corner of Heaven Page 4
