by Naomi Niles
When the casserole was done baking, I pulled it from the oven to cool. "This recipe is my mother's," I bragged to Halle.
"Is your mom my grandma?" she asked innocently.
The question made me pause. Lifting the little girl into my arms I said thoughtfully, "No, because even though I love you, I'm not your mother."
"You do all the things moms do."
"I know that, but Missy is your real mom."
"I wish you were my real mom," she said thoughtfully.
"Well, in my heart, you'll always be my daughter," I assured her.
"In my heart, you're my real mom." She hugged me tightly around the neck, and I had to squeeze my eyes shut to hold in the tears. Swallowing back the emotion that threatened to overwhelm me, I smiled brightly at the little girl and said cheerily, "Let's set the table. Your daddy will be home any minute, and we want everything to be ready."
"Daddy's coming home now?" Halle looked elated and anxious simultaneously. "I have to put on my ballerina dress!"
"Don't worry; there's plenty of time to do both. I'll help you get dressed, and then we can set the table." I smiled.
"No, I can dress myself. I'm not a baby anymore," she insisted. I was about to object when she pleaded with her best puppy-dog eyes. "Please. Please let me do it myself. I want to make Daddy proud."
"All right. Go upstairs and put on your ballerina dress, and I'll stay here and set the table."
Morton followed the little girl up the stairs as Blake went to check on his team of men watching the house. Glad to be alone for once, I happily turned to the task of setting the table, singing softly to myself as I folded each napkin and placed a fork upon it.
"Well, isn't this fucking sweet," an angry voice said, and I looked up to find Missy leaning in the doorway between the living room and the dining room. "Little Miss Happy Homemaker, preparing for her man to come home to the pot roast she cooked in her little apron."
"Actually, it's casserole."
Missy was clearly stoned and drunk, and I couldn't hide my irritation and disappointment. As much as I hated her for using the sobriety clinic to help her get custody of Halle, I had been cheering for her to get clean from drugs and alcohol. Praying against losing Halle had not meant I wasn't rooting for her mother to be healthy and clean from addiction.
Tate had warned me Missy had a cycle of getting clean, threatening to take Halle, and then relapsing back into addiction. I hadn't wanted to believe him, especially when he said Missy's recent behavior of going out at night and then locking herself in her room and refusing to come out meant she was using again. Now I saw he had been right. The angry, surly proof was standing in front of me, taunting me for my happiness.
"There are only three plates here," she slurred, slumping into the chair that should have been mine.
"I wasn't expecting you," I said. "You've been gone for days."
"Well, that's because I knew you were doing the cooking. Your food tastes like shit."
"You would know what feces tastes like," I muttered under my breath. I shouldn't have done it, but I was so irritated by her selfish and irresponsible behavior. Halle was just upstairs putting on her ballerina dress so she could give her Daddy a show after dinner. What if she came down and saw her mother like this? It had the potential to cause irreparable damage to her young psyche. I felt a maternal need to protect her from harm – even from her own biological mother.
"What did you say to me, bitch?" Missy pushed back from the table and squared off to me with a threatening stance.
"I said, you're not invited to have dinner with us, at least not until you sober up."
"Ha! I don't need your fucking invitation. I'm Halle's fucking mother, not you. Tate and I are her fucking parents, not you and him, but you prance around here like you’re some kind of family. Like he's going to marry you and make you his wife when you're nothing more than something for him to shove his dick into."
"I mean a lot more to him than that. I'm Tate's girlfriend. He loves me, and you hate that. Jealousy is not pretty on you."
"What do I have to be jealous of? You're playing a game of make-believe, staying here and playing house. You think you're the first girlfriend he's had? He's using you, and you're stupid enough to think he loves you. He's just found a way to trick you into doing everything for free. He used to have to pay you to watch his kid and suck his dick, now you're doing all that, plus the cooking and cleaning for free. You're the dumbest cunt I've ever met."
"Watch your language, Missy. Halle could come in any minute, and she doesn't need to hear that kind of talk – and she shouldn't see you in this condition," I said in hushed tones while Missy kept getting louder and more belligerent with every word.
Finally, I couldn't take her vulgar ranting any longer and said firmly, "Tate asked you to leave as soon as you found a new place to live, but I can't wait that long. You need to move out tonight."
"What the fuck did you say to me?" My knees began to tremble when she closed the gap between us with quick, menacing steps. She was irrational and amped on drugs, more than capable of kicking my ass. Still, I refused to back down to her intimidation.
"You heard me. I want you to get your things and leave – right now."
To my relief, Blake appeared in the doorway; I'd never been so glad to see him in my life. Grabbing Missy by the arm, he said gruffly, "Rachelle has asked you to leave. It's time for you to vacate the premises. I'll have my men pack up your room and take you anywhere you want to go."
"Get your fucking hands off of me. I don't need my fucking things. All the shit here is from Tate, so I don't want any of it. He can keep it all and shove it up his fucking ass. And, I don't need a fucking ride anywhere from your goons. I'm more than capable of getting where I need to go on my own," Missy ranted angrily as Blake half guided/half dragged her to the door.
"Good, then you're prepared to leave now. If you change your mind about wanting your belongings, give me your forwarding address and I'll have them sent there."
"Fuck you, you asshole. And fuck you, Rachelle, you mindless cunt." Missy's eyes bore into mine with a venomous hatred that was so intense, it was like a slap in the face, and I staggered back a bit.
Then she slammed the front door behind her, and she was gone.
"Are you all right?" Blake asked me with concern.
"I'm fine," I said, but I was clearly shaken. Suddenly, my knees buckled, and he caught me in his strong arms, holding me close to his chest.
"You're not alright," he said, stroking my cheek.
"I will be," I said, trapped in his embrace. "It was just the stress of wanting to protect Halle from seeing that. The sweet little thing has been through enough already."
"I could say the same thing about you – but you don't need to worry. When I saw you were having a confrontation with Missy, I told Morton to keep Halle upstairs until Missy left. You have nothing to worry about. I'm taking care of everything."
"Thanks, but Tate..." I didn't know how to tell Blake that I was uncomfortable with him holding me so close and saying such intimate things. It was too familiar, and no matter what spark of sexual chemistry we may have felt between each other in the past, it was gone now. I was completely and fully in love with Tate and devoted to him with all my heart.
Misunderstanding my concern, Blake brushed his finger across my lip in a hushing gesture. "You don't need to worry about him, either. I'll give him a fully detailed report on what happened during the morning debriefing tomorrow. For tonight, you should just enjoy a relaxing dinner with him. I know how hard you worked to prepare it."
Blake started to lean in to kiss me, and I didn't fight against him. In fact, I nearly leaned in, too.
"Rachelle?" Tate's voice suddenly called in the distance, and I realized he had come home through the door in the garage. Blake released his hold on me as he entered the room, and I stepped away from him, but not before Tate caught sight of us wrapped in each other's arms.
My heart rose up in my
throat as his eyes narrowed. I knew he'd be pissed, and this time, he had a right to be. Blake had clearly been about to kiss me; I just hoped Tate didn't think I had willingly been a part of it. I was about to say something to defend myself when he pulled me into his arms. "Is everything all right? I just saw Missy getting into a cab."
"Yes. I'll give you a full report about Missy's departure in the morning. Everything else is under control, with no uninvited guests," Blake said to him, and the two men shared an intense look, the meaning of which I didn't fully understand. It wasn't jealousy or rage, but it had elements of danger and fear.
"What's going on?" I asked, certain he was upset about what I'd done. Tate didn't respond. Instead, he dismissed Blake from the room and then walked me into the dining room like nothing was wrong.
If he was upset about seeing me with Blake or for having caused Missy to leave, he was masking it well. "The table looks beautiful, and dinner smells great," Tate said a little too cheerily. "It feels so good to come home after a long day. Where's Halle?"
"Here I am, Daddy!" Halle appeared in the doorway in her lavender ballerina dress, a plastic tiara placed crookedly atop her lush chocolate curls.
She ran into her father's arms, and the two hugged each other tightly. As I watched the happy sight, I couldn't help but smile, and the tension I had felt just a few moments ago drained from my body. Perhaps I was just being paranoid because I felt guilty about throwing Missy out and nearly kissing Blake. With Tate finally home, it was time to forget all that and just enjoy the moment.
"Wait until you taste the cake we made; but dinner first." I smiled. Then I took Tate by the hand on one side, and Halle on the other and the three of us went into the dining room together.
It was a perfect family meal, just the three of us. Missy was gone, there was a team of bodyguards keeping us safe from Stuart, and Tate was home from a satisfying day at work looking invigorated. As he chatted on about how great it had felt to be at the office again, I couldn't have been happier for him, and that night we made tender love in our bed until we both climaxed in unison.
My life was perfect. Perhaps I had made more of the incident with Blake in my mind than it really was, otherwise Tate would have done a lot more than just exchange a brief look with him. He wasn't even upset that I'd forced Missy to move out. Maybe I was just looking for our relationship to fall apart because I had never been so happy.
Well, no more paranoia. From now on, I was just going to enjoy my life.
Chapter Sixty-Eight: Tate
It was amazing how quickly my life had fallen into a comfortable routine. At 6:00 a.m., the alarm clock would go off, and I'd leap out of bed feeling well rested and excited to start the day. Some days Rachelle and I would make love in the morning, but most days I'd just let her sleep in because I knew how exhausting her day could be taking care of Halle and doing everything else she did around the house, including helping Emma with tasks she was getting too old to do alone.
Rachelle had expanded her role from nanny to cook and housekeeper with grace, thriving admirably. It wasn't easy, and I was impressed by how well she did it. She made my once cold and empty mansion feel like a warm and loving home that I couldn't wait to get back to at the end of each workday.
So, I'd simply kiss her on the forehead and let her sleep, jump in the shower, throw on a suit, and rush out the door. I'd eat a breakfast sandwich in the back of the car while Scott drove me across town to the office. Then, as soon as I walked through the door of the lobby, my day was a whirlwind of meetings, important phone calls, reviewing reports, signing contracts, and making deals.
Every detail was important, and every decision was ultimately mine to make. Sure, I delegated duties and counted on my top employees to keep my businesses running, but in the end, I was the one who was ultimately in charge of everything. The responsibility and pressure was huge, but I thrived on it. Every day at the office was filled with non-stop action, and I loved it.
The only downside was not being home with Rachelle and Halle, but I knew they were safe and happy. Rachelle nurtured and cared for Halle as if she were her own. She was just the kind of mother I always hoped my little girl would have, and it filled my heart to see how happy she made my daughter.
Of course, Halle wasn't the only one whose life Rachelle filled with sunshine. I loved her more than ever thought possible and was amazed by how happy she made me. Coming home to her beautiful smile each night was the highlight of my workday and the one thing that made me hesitant to leave again in the morning.
Once I was at the office, however, and my days were busy with endless tasks, I had very little time to dwell about home or worry. Halle had Rachelle, Emma, Morton, and the rest of Barnes' security team to keep watch over her; and with Blake Barnes himself guarding over Rachelle, I knew she was in good hands too. Perhaps too good of hands.
As much as I didn't want to, I hated it that Barnes had a past connection with Rachelle. She'd assured me that there was nothing to it, that they hadn't dated or ever kissed, but there no doubt they shared a connection. That hug he gave her when they first saw each other in my office lasted way too long to be perfunctory, and anytime I saw them together, he was way too close. There were no space boundaries between them, and they were entirely too comfortable being in close proximately to each other. Every time I thought about it, it made my stomach churn, and my jaw ached from clenching it.
He was probably hovering over her right now. I could just picture it. Rachelle in her tight jeans that hugged her perfect ass, and her short blonde hair looking sassy and sexy as always. She was probably in the kitchen, reaching up into one of the high cupboards for a mixing bowl. Her short tee shirt rising up past her mid-drift as she stretched, giving a tempting glimpse of her flat stomach, petite bodice, and as she kept reaching, the sumptuous curve of the bottom part of her large, round and perky breasts.
Pretty boy Barnes would sweep in behind her with a fake offer to help. His arm would graze her body as he took the bowl down off the shelf for her. Their lips would come close to touching as he set it on the counter, and then his hands would slowly encircle her sexy curves. Would Rachelle turn him down with a slap, or would she lean into his touch, allowing him to embrace her? I wondered.
Suddenly, the pencil I was holding snapped in two, startling me from my insane jealous daydream.
"Are you okay, Mr. Holland?" my secretary, Tanya, asked me, and I realized I'd forgotten she was even there, taking notes as I read memos and signed paperwork before handing them to her.
"Yes, I'm fine. I just need some time away from the office. I've been away from home too long. I'm leaving for the day."
"But it's only noon." She blinked.
"I know. Cancel all my afternoon appointments and hold all my messages. Everything can wait until tomorrow; I'm spending some time with Rachelle and Halle."
"Yes, Sir," she said, slightly taken aback, but I didn't care.
It was insane for me to sit here in my office seething with jealousy over Rachelle and Barnes. Rachelle loved me; I knew she did. Barnes was only there because I had hired him to be by her side every minute; it was his fucking job.
The only reason I was so fucking jealous was because I knew I hadn't been spending enough time with her – or Halle either for that matter. I couldn't go from being home every day for months to suddenly being gone all day. There needed to be a balance between my work and personal life, starting right now.
"Have you made lunch yet?" I called Rachelle from my cell while in route in my car.
"Not yet, I was just about to. Halle's been playing in the sprinklers in the backyard, so she's working up quite the appetite. Morton is soaked, but bearing it well."
"Well, stop what you're doing immediately. Tell everyone to towel off and get dressed. Meet me at the zoo in forty-five minutes."
"Are you serious?" I could hear the elation in Rachelle's voice.
"Yes. It's been far too long since we've had a day of fun."
"Okay, we'll meet you there," Rachelle said happily, and I could just picture her gorgeous smile. When we met at the entrance of the zoo, I wasn't disappointed. She was stunning in denim shorts and a pale blue tank top. I wished we could make love right on the hood of my car, but it wasn't the time.
Halle looked absolutely overjoyed as she ran along the path at the zoo in her shorts and ruffled tee-shirt, with her dark brown curls pulled back into two thick ponytails with matching bows. She had a balloon in one hand, and her beloved giraffe in the other, with Morton standing just one step beside her the whole way.
Rachelle and I trailed several feet behind, holding hands and laughing as we took delight at her enthusiasm.
"See that? You'll get to be that big one day when you grow up." Halle held her plush toy up to the bars of the giraffe enclosure and pointed at one of the gentle giants lazily eating leaves off a tall branch in the distance.
"This was a really great idea coming here today." Rachelle smiled at me, and when she did, it outshone the sun.
"Thanks. I'm glad to know I still have a few of those hidden up my sleeve," I joked, making her smile again.
We had a wonderful afternoon together, and by the time we got home, Halle was already asleep, having passed out in the car.
"I had hoped running all over the zoo looking at animals would wear her out," I said to Rachelle as we tucked her into bed, leaving Morton standing post outside her door.
"You look just as tired. When's the new shift coming on duty to relieve you?" I asked him.
"In half an hour. Don't worry, I can stay fully alert till then," Morton said, straightening his spine, but there were still bits of popcorn on his shoulder, and Rachelle had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing aloud.
"Well, tell the relief for Barnes that Rachelle and I want complete privacy tonight. I'll keep the emergency alarm close at hand in case of trouble."
"Yes, Sir."
I led my blushing girlfriend by the hand to the master bedroom suite. "Now everyone will know what we're doing in here." She flushed the moment the door was closed and locked behind us.
