“Why don’t I make some coffee?” Erin asked, still watching me.
“That would be great. Cabinet next to the stove.”
She nodded and disappeared as I turned back to my dad. He’d aged since I’d last seen him. A lot. His hair was no longer black, but salt and pepper. It made who I was harder to face. I’d done this. I had turned my back on my loving family, all to keep them safe.
“You been okay, Alexander? We’ve missed you.”
Heartache had my chest feeling as though it was caving in. “I’ve been good. Keeping busy with work.”
He shut the door and I led him over to the sofa. We sat on opposite ends while he continued.
“What kind of work are you doing these days?”
Uneasiness crept in and I shrugged. “Odds and ends—logging. Sometimes I work for a man named Mr. Gretzil, half an hour out, helping him with his cattle. Stuff like that.”
He nodded, rocking with the motion. I’d seen it my entire life and seeing it now was like home. One I didn’t deserve.
“You know your place at the shop is still open. You were a hell of a mechanic. You’re always welcome back. I’d sure love to have you around.”
God, why did this have to be so hard? Why hadn’t I looked before I opened the door? I had assumed it was Caleb.
“I’ll think about it.” My voice was quiet. The knots in my stomach twisted tighter. I wanted to take him up on his offer more than he knew. I could sure use the money. And for it to be like the old days, him and I, together. Why couldn’t this nightmare end?
“How’s mom?” I could barely meet his eyes as I asked.
“She’s been keeping busy. She started these online courses in accounting. She seems to like it.”
Confusion filtered, but I was smiling. “Like, college classes?”
“Yeah,” my dad laughed. “Who would have thought? Your mother, a college babe.”
A laugh burst from my mouth and I felt the familiar bond I had with my father weasel its way in. My love for my parents thrived and it wasn’t a good thing. My wolf manipulated everything. What if he transitioned his focus from Erin to them? It wasn’t likely, but there was still a possibility.
“I’m glad she’s taking them. You two seem like you’re doing good.”
“Eh, we could be better.” He grew serious and I felt the joy being sucked right out of me. “Why don’t you come over for dinner tomorrow night? You can bring your investigator friend. There’s not much in the way of restaurants in this town and I’m sure she’d like a decent meal.”
“Oh… I don’t know.” I turned to look toward the kitchen, catching Erin standing there, caught off guard. I felt just as trapped as she looked. We were both being put on the spot. But I wanted to accept the offer. I wanted to see my mother and introduce her to Erin. It wasn’t like Erin and I were an item, but fuck, I wanted to get to know her more. I wanted to keep her close to me.
“What do you think?” my dad asked, already staring in the direction I was. “Would you like to come over for dinner with Alexander tomorrow? Eat some real food.”
She looked between us and I could see her dilemma. She was afraid to get too close to any of us, just like I was. Maybe that’s why we had chemistry. We were both searching for something neither of us wanted to admit to.
“I would love to. If that’s alright with Alex.”
I hesitated, so confused. “Sure.”
“Great,” my dad said, standing. “What should I tell your mother? Six?”
I stood, joining him. “Six would be great.”
His large arms embraced me and I hesitated before I returned the hug. It felt so out of place, yet, it was as if he could read my mind. As if he knew what I needed.
“Your mother is going to be so happy. I look forward to our dinner.” He pulled back, waving at Erin. “Sorry about the coffee, but I should be getting home for some sleep. You two take care. See you tomorrow.”
I walked him out, shutting the door behind him in a daze. Had that really just happened? Had I really agreed to go to dinner at my parents’ house? Parents I hadn’t seen and hid from for over a decade? God, speaking with my father had been like nothing had changed at all. Like I’d only left yesterday.
“Come show me how you like your coffee.”
Erin’s voice broke through and I headed in her direction.
“I’m sorry about that back there. I know you probably feel uncomfortable going. I can call and tell them we changed our minds.”
“You’ll do no such thing.” She handed me a mug filled with coffee. I waved off the sugar and cream. “I think it’ll be good for you to reunite with your parents. And I’d like to meet your mother. Your dad is a great guy. We talked a little last night while we were walking through the woods. He told me some interesting and funny stories about you. I’m not sure if he needed to tell them to get his mind off of what we were doing, or because he could sense how hard it was for me. Regardless, they helped us both. I have to admit, they were pretty funny.”
“Stories?” My cup paused mid-way to my mouth. “Stories about what?”
Erin just smiled as she took her coffee and headed for the living room. When she sat on the sofa, I joined her.
“Let me see. You once had a pet turtle named…”
“Weber,” I said, cautiously.
“That’s right, Weber. And one Halloween—”
“No, no, no.” I said, cutting her off. “I can’t believe he told you this.”
“And one Halloween, you decided to dress him up. The entire night you carried him around in your orange, plastic pumpkin. Your mom had to carry around an extra one just so you’d have something to put the candy in.”
“I can’t believe he remembered that. I was six,” I laughed.
“It was cute. What were the two of you dressed as? Your dad didn’t say.”
I let out a laugh as memories of that night flooded in. “I was Batman, and he was Robin. Although, looking back, I didn’t think his costume through very good. The cape came off every time he pulled his head in. Which was a lot. My mom would have to stop and wait while I attempted to get it back on. It was a mess.”
Erin giggled, blasting me with the most beautiful smile. My mood went from happy to a mix of feelings I couldn’t even grasp. She’d never know how much it meant to me just to carry a conversation with someone. Too many day and weeks I’d go without communication with anyone at all. I was so tired of being isolated. Alone.
She took another drink, setting the mug down on the coffee table. “I heard about your first kiss, too. Little Missy Baxton behind the school’s cafeteria. What teacher caught you? Mr…”
“Bates. And he was wrong calling my parents. I was eight. And it was just a fast peck on the lips. She hit me too. Missy Baxton,” I repeated, laughing. “I think she ended up marrying Tommy Leal. They were engaged last I heard, but that was years ago.”
Erin stood, sliding off her jacket and tossing it on the couch. “If you ask me, she chose the wrong man. She has no idea what she’s missing.”
My coffee was on the table before Erin removed her shirt the entire way. I lunged forward, sweeping her into my arms and kissing her mouth before it hit the floor. The eagerness that met me was all I needed to see. This was the start of something huge. Something that didn’t happen every day. Especially to people like me. I shouldn’t have wanted it, and I shouldn’t have fallen into temptation when I knew better, but rationality was gone. I was gone.
Chapter 17
Erin
Air wouldn’t come as I felt my back connect with the wall. Alex and I were all over each other, pulling at each other’s clothes, kissing the entire time. Whether my lack of oxygen came from his weight pinning me against the wall or how swept away I was in the moment, I wasn’t sure.
“You’ll never know how much I love the way you taste.”
He moaned into my mouth, tugging at the button on my jeans. It came loose and the zipper lowered. A cry broke from my mouth as h
is hand pushed into my panties. The tips of his fingers flattened over my folds, rubbing into the wetness until one plunged into my opening.
“I’m about to fuck this pussy so good. You want my cock. Tell me.”
Another of his digits slid into my channel and I couldn’t help but jerk at his shirt. He bent down enough for me to pull it over his head, but came back, slamming his weight and fingers back into me. Thrusting had me breathing hard as I returned to hold his broad, muscular shoulders.
“Tell me. Let me hear you say it.”
“Yes, I want your cock.”
“How bad?”
A small cry escaped and my impending answer was cut off by his lips connecting back with mine. The pressure of his palm rubbed into my clit and I broke my mouth free to gasp.
“Bad. Fuck me,” I begged. “Don’t stop until it’s impossible for you to go anymore. However long it takes.”
Alex’s fingers slowed inside of me and a grin pulled at the side of his lips. “Do you know what you’re asking? If you have the time, I’ll stretch out every second you give me, greedily. Food, sleep, none of that matters compared to you.” He leaned forward, running his nose along my cheek. The atmosphere changed and everything slowed. Our panting was the only thing that sounded.
“How about we go until you can’t continue. My wellbeing means nothing to me. Yours is what I care for.”
He pulled back and I took in his serious expression. I knew he’d meant every word he said. I didn’t want this feeling I was experiencing to end and apparently neither did he. The realization that we had such passion for each other cleared my mind. It reminded me of the pain that came from the last four weeks. Sexually, we were electric, but what about the tomorrow, or a week from now? What happened when it was time for me to go? Alex was unstable. He wanted a connection, but he didn’t trust himself to have it. What if I fell harder for him and he ran me off? Or pushed me away like he had already done? We needed to slow things down. That was our problem together. Everything was too intense.
I looked over and from the way Alex was studying me, I almost felt he could read my mind. As his fingers moved, massaging slowly inside of me again, I couldn’t help but turn my head off to the side. Confusion plagued me and I couldn’t block it out.
“You like me. You like this, and that’s causing you to want to pull away. But I’m not so sure I’m going to be able to let you,” he whispered. “Not now, not tomorrow. I want what I shouldn’t. I’m desperate to make you want this.” He pinned me harder into the wall with his weight, moving his face to fit against mine. His breath tickled my ear and I shivered at the lust that was still thriving.
“You want to make me want this? Alex, it’s too loo late for that. I want it. You know I do.” I tried to put my thoughts together as he kept thrusting. “Are you going to pull away from me again? I don’t want you to. I fear … you’re going to hurt me. Are you listening?” I asked, as his eyes lowered. “It hurt me when you did that. Are you going to do disappear again?”
The pleasure dissipated as he removed his fingers from my pussy. When he lowered and jerked my pants free, I wasn’t sure if it was an answer or not. Slowly, he rose, towering over me with determination heavily in his stare. I blinked past the odd sensation as I looked into his eyes. The gold specks were bright, mixing with the brown. How could eyes do that to someone? Make them forget almost everything?
“The last thing I want is to hurt you. But you’re right to worry. I can’t see the future. I don’t know how things are going to turn out. What I do know is, I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I’m not sure if I can leave you alone.” His hand wedged between my legs and he cupped my pussy. “Let’s not talk about that now. I’m dying to taste you again. Tell me you want me to suck on your pussy.” He moaned, tracing over my wetness. “Tell me, Erin. When I think back on this, I want to hear the need in your voice.”
I sucked in air as his fingers circled repeatedly over my opening. When he thought back on this? Was that my answer? He’d think back because I wouldn’t be there? The phrase repeated continuously as I tried to decipher some sort of hidden meaning behind it. He didn’t want to talk about this now. He couldn’t tell the future…
“Look at me.” Alex made me hold eye contact as he began to lower to his knees. He was waiting for my reaction. Waiting to see if I’d say his words or make him stop. Something dark flickered as he pushed my legs wide. His personality was shifting. I’d seen it that night we’d spent together. The thought made me weak in the knees, but I wasn’t sure I should give in.
“Tell me, Erin. I want to hear it.”
“And if I don’t?”
A small growl left him and his tongue flicked over my clit, pushing between my folds as he made a path to my opening. My fingers pushed into his hair and I gripped, still not sure on what I should do. I should slow things down. Fuck, I knew I should.
My grip tightened as his hand squeezed into my thighs. Suction against my pussy delayed my decision and when his tongue pushed into me, all thoughts or concerns vanished. Sucking, fucking, back to sucking. His tongue tortured me.
“Wait,” I managed through heavy breaths.
“No.” The one word sent vibrations to all the right places and I cried out, fisting his hair with almost all of my strength. Harder, he pushed his face into me. The depth he reached within my channel was perfect. It felt too good to debate with what I really desired. “Tell me,” he ground out.
His hand rose and he pushed his thumb against the top of my slit. When he moved his focus to the sensitive nub he was so good at teasing, my resolved faded into nothing but embers. But they were transitioning in their heat. I was on fire for him. The more time that went by, the hotter I became.
“I can taste how much you want to come. Give it to me, Erin. Give me what I want.”
There it was, that deepness in his tone. It was sexy all in its own. Demanding without mercy. I knew he meant the command and damned if I wanted to fight it to see what he’d do.
“I … can’t,” I said, meeting his intense stare. “Not if you’re going to hurt me.”
His eyes narrowed the slightest amount. Pressure from him diving back to my pussy pulled against my fisted grip. I knew it had to have hurt, but he didn’t act as though it did. Each stroke of his tongue was determined. Each thrust, deep. I bit my bottom lip, trying my hardest not to cave to the pleasure.
“Alex?”
I tried pulling his head back, but he didn’t budge in his sucking over my clit. Hands locked on my hips almost painfully and his message was clear. Unfortunately, pain was my weakness. His nails dug into my lower back and the sting unlocked and blew open doors I thought I had locked for good. My orgasm surged through me and I screamed while the spasms left me shaking and jolting at their force.
Loud moans hummed against my pussy. Alex’s tongue pushed into my channel and all I could do was hold on as he wrapped his arms around me like a vice and began licking my release free. Minutes passed and I was so weak and tired, he was more holding me up than anything. He was still going, still tasting me. Where he was almost rough before, he was gentle, taking his time. Just when I thought I couldn’t stand another second, he lifted, sweeping me into his arms. The hallway blurred and I was placed in his bed. I half expected him to position himself on top of me and fuck me hard for not obeying, but he didn’t. He wouldn’t even look at me.
“Get some sleep. I forgot I have some things to do. I’ll wake you up in a few hours.”
His deep, raspy words were sobering. A slap in the face for me giving in to begin with. I fought to sit, pushing away the fatigue. “I beg your pardon? You’re suddenly busy?”
He glanced up long enough to acknowledge me, but turned for the door, holding to his side. “You’ve had a long night. I’ll be back soon. Do not leave this room.”
The last was said with such authority, it had me hesitating before responding. Unfortunately, the door was already thudding shut. My lips stayed separated as I st
ared at the wooden barrier. Was he running again?
My head shook, even though I was almost sure. What the fuck was going on with us? Why did I care? He had already basically told me I wasn’t going to be in his future anyway. This was probably for the best. But I wasn’t staying here in his bed. That was crossing the line for me.
The front door slammed shut and I threw back the blankets. This is what I got for hoping. For even letting myself think that what was happening could be anything more than what it was—lust. It had both of us under its power.
I walked into the hall, picking up my clothes along the way. When I was dressed, I grabbed my keys, heading for my car. It didn’t take me but a few minutes to pull into my driveway. Alex had been nowhere to be seen. It baffled me, but I wasn’t going to fret on it. This was for the best. I’d go to dinner at his parents tomorrow, be there as a friend to support him through this huge event, and that was it. I knew if I didn’t go, he wouldn’t either. I cared too much for their broken relationship to hurt his parents by having him pulling away from them also. What happened after we left would be up to him. I’d have to see if he even came back to begin with. Knowing his previous actions, I might not even see him for another few weeks. If I did at all.
I shut the car door behind me, digging through my purse as I approached. My steps faltered at the broken wooden door frame. Pieces littered the deck, drawing my attention to the surrounding mess. My pulse exploded as I reached into my bag and grabbed my gun and phone. I didn’t have to guess what broke into my cabin. A sickening feeling rooted deep and images of the creature eating the boy’s insides blinded me. I dialed Caleb’s number, moving toward my car at a quick pace.
“Erin.”
My brow creased at hearing my first name. I was getting too personal with these people. It was so unlike me.
“Detective, I need you to come over to my cabin.” I paused remembering how he’d gone home before the search. He had gotten sicker, unable to continue. “I’m sorry. I forgot you’re not well. I’ll call the department and have them send over a deputy.”
WOLF (Wolf River Book 1) Page 15
