by Matson, TC
I’ve never been on this side of damage control, but it’s shit. It’s like trekking through quicksand in a fucking rainstorm. In my grasp was something I wanted, something that my heart felt like it was beating for, and now she’s in pain. Hurt by my world. Immediately, I grab my phone and call her but she sends me to voicemail. Dammit!
Chapter 26
Morning has come quicker than anticipated. I swear I just closed my eyes and now it’s time to get up. I need to catch a plane home. After Blain and I left last night, we rushed to Levi’s hotel to get my things, scrambling to get out of there before he came back. By the time we got to Blain’s hotel, I was exhausted from all the emotions that bled from my body. Bed was calling my name and thankfully Blain gave me his master suite. I didn’t put up a fight—bed or couch—it wasn’t a hard choice.
I had to turn my phone off before I could fall asleep because Levi wouldn’t stop calling or texting, which was only a constant reminder that kept repeating what I saw over and over in my mind. I tossed and turned for most of the night wondering who the woman was and what they meant to each other. One thing’s for sure—there’s no denying they have a past. Bad boys…I should have known better.
As I open the bedroom door, I’m smacked in the face with the smell of coffee and bacon giving away Blain’s choice for breakfast. I pad down the short hallway and round the corner immediately being shushed by Blain nodding toward the recliner. In it—Levi.
“He got here after you went to bed,” he whispers as I reach for my pot of gold to get my morning motivation.
“What the hell for?” I groan.
“He’s determined to talk to you. I talked to him for a little bit myself. Paigey, don’t shut him out until you’ve heard him through. I mean it,” he says sternly to make his point.
I’ve heard enough and set my hot mug down on the counter and make my way back to the room to take a shower. Best medicine for anything—take a shower and wash all your problems down the drain. That’s what Mom taught me and I’ve lived by that for years. It truly helps. You’re able to let off steam, quietly yelling and cussing an invisible someone, pouring your emotions out behind the privacy of locked doors. It’s soothing. You get to sort through everything while ridding your body of the filth that’s fogging your brain. It’s like killing two birds with one stone as the saying goes.
I’ve vented and now dressed stepping out of the bathroom connecting eyes with a very tired Levi sitting on the edge of the bed. “You could have answered my calls,” he says straightforward.
“I was tired and needed to process things,” I state.
“Kind of a bitch way to handle things. Now will you let me explain?”
I nod, ignoring the attitude, pulling the towel off my head and running my fingers through its wet tangles.
His brows furrow together. “Have you had your coffee yet?”
I spin around, slitting my eyes. “What’s that got to do with anything?”
“Wondering if I need a shield or not.”
“If you’re gonna waste my—”
He quickly rises, gripping my shoulders forcing me to sit on the bed. “Stop. Calm down.” He grabs a chair and drops down into it front of me. “It wasn’t what it looked like.”
I hate that sentence. It’s never what it looked like. “Then explain, please. I need to get my stuff packed.”
“I’ve told you I’ve never done relationships except the one I’m trying now.”
“You’ve slept with her,” I blurt with jealousy nudging my tone.
“Yes, we were a thing for about a year. More of a convenience thing. She’s a gold digger, a woman out for money. If one man runs short or holds his green from her, she moves on to the next. I gave in for a little while until I could get more ass…I mean until I smartened up,” he corrects himself clearing his throat.
I tighten my eyes at him. “You don’t do relationships, but you were with her for a year?”
“We weren’t exclusive, Paige. We both knew it. We were each other’s fallback.”
“Well, what did she want last night? Another fallback?” Spite pangs me.
“Cory, my boss, has me attend a few fundraisers and press parties a year. He wants me and Allison to attend a red carpet together.”
I roll my eyes and jump to my feet. “You’re kidding me right?” I storm past him.
He jumps up and grabs my elbow turning me back to him and pulling me into his chest. “Whatever happened in your past, I’m not him. I promised I’d do my best at this and I’m telling you, Paige, I don’t want anyone else. As hard as it is to believe, for the both of us, whatever it is you’ve done to me, it has a death grip. Shit’s unreal.”
Tears are warming my eyes. “Then why her? Why do you have to go with her?”
“She’s a round girl, not by being passed around the guys, but the girl who holds the—”
“I’m not stupid, Levi,” I shout trying to push him away, but he wraps his strong arms around my waist and plants my ass back on the bed squatting in front of me.
“You have to give me the benefit of a doubt here. I’m being honest and I’ll stay that way. I slept in a fucking recliner to talk to you. May not seem like a lot to you, but that shit was uncomfortable as hell. I might fuck up with the things I do, but I’m not going to fuck up on you. You’ve voodooed me or something, but whatever it is, you’re stuck with me. There’s not a chance in hell I’m letting you walk away.”
I’m so confused. I’m hurt. I don’t know if I can handle his lifestyle. I don’t know if I can deal with his past. I don’t know if I can deal with anything right now.
Suddenly, he cups my face and kisses me intensely, unleashing a dizzying, overwhelming sense to wash over me. I’m still pissed from last night but captivation tickles my spine, love wraps around my heart and slaps me in my face. I’m falling for him and there’s nothing, not a damn thing, I can do about it.
Double shifts today. This will be the first time since Levi and I became a couple that I’ve had to pull it off. Levi flew back with Blain and me and booked a hotel moments away from the house. He wants to work on us, show me he’s serious by strengthening our relationship, and I quote, “have me whenever he wants me.” He’s kept to his word.
Friday mornings are normally slow and gratefully today is just that. I’ve not had but one table for over an hour and it’s several business men apparently having a meeting. Three of them are extremely callous, two of them are nice, and one hasn’t said much but smiles politely every time I check on them. Being a server can be grueling at times and it takes everything I have not to dump a pot of hot coffee on the assholes’ laps. I shake my head placing the dirty plate in the sink. I’m starting to sound like Levi.
“So how’s that sexy hunk doing?” Holly wiggles her brows.
“I like knowing you fantasize about my boyfriend,” I reply lightheartedly.
She grabs her hand against her chest and inhales deeply. “You give me something to live for, Paige,” she says overdramatically laughing.
“That’s sad.”
“I know. You have both men I fantasize about in arm’s reach. Now that Levi is out of the question, I’m onto Blain.”
“Holly, you know—”
“I’m not his type,” she interrupts. “I can always try to make me his type. You never know, he might like it after he dips into it.”
“Omigod. No! Shush!” I quietly shriek laughing. “I need bleach for my eyes.”
The door chimes and Holly leans back looking out to the restaurant. “Oh yay. She looks stuck up and too sleazy for this place. Let’s go get run to death for a dollar tip,” she sighs exiting out to her table.
I snicker at her remark. Hell, my table is just as bad.
Trying to be as nice as possible, I smile setting the check down for the businessmen when a sinister high-pitched giggle echoes from across the room. It’s enough to pique my interest, and when I turn my pulse stops. Sitting with her long brown hair wrapping her face, a ne
on orange tank top pushing her boobs under her chin, and a pound of makeup on is Allison with a bleached blonde equally dressed.
What the hell is she doing here?
Let’s be a polite bitch, why don’t we? I fake a smile as I walk up to the table. “Hello, Allison,” I say in my best bubbly tone.
Her eyes drop to my Chucks then back up, her face scrunching in disgust. “A waitress? Now that’s a surprise. He usually goes for more attractive women like us,” she motions her hand between her and Blondie.
Does kindness really kill a bitch? Because it’s taking everything not to reach out and smack her. “I don’t want him for his money,” I scoff.
“Oh!” blondie says. “Me neither. I wanted him in bed.”
I can feel the hurt burning into my cheeks spreading to my chest. They’re vindictive. Allison snickers. “We both did. Remember that time when we—”
“I get it, Allison,” I interrupt before I puke on her lap. “No need for details.”
“Oh, but it was fun,” blondie bites her fingernail.
Wonder how this fork would feel in their eyes?
Holly returns with their drinks and sets them down on the table. This is my perfect escape. “You girls have a good lunch,” I grit turning and walking away.
“Girls? We’re women. Perfect in all the right spots just like Levi likes,” Allison says to my back. “And trust me, he likes all my perfect spots.”
That stops me in my tracks forcing me to take a deep breath and count to ten before turning to face the nightmare. “Is that right? Last time I checked he’s at my house waiting for me.” It’s a lie but she doesn’t know it…I hope.
“He’ll be done with you soon and crawling back to me before you can figure out what he’s all about,” Allison sneers.
Will I lose my job if I wrap my fingers around her throat?
“Get out now,” Holly demands pointing at the door.
“Excuse me? I’m not leaving until I eat,” blondie replies offended.
“You will not be eating here. You do not get to come in and act like this. Get out. Now!” Holly yells.
I’m frozen. I’m not scared, not afraid, but I sure as hell have no clue what to say, so I tighten my lips, soften my eyes, and smile at them smugly.
Allison huffs and slides out of the booth, stopping nose to nose with Holly. “I’ll call your manager and have you fired today.”
Holly pretends to be surprised. “Geez, that hurts so much. Paige,” she turns to me. “I saw she hit you. Would you like to call the police?”
Allison gasps. “You wouldn’t?”
“Try me,” Holly tells her.
I’m fighting laughter. Allison’s expression is priceless. I don’t see with all that makeup on how her eyebrows can jump so high as her face falls. She jerks her purse strap onto her shoulder and stomps directly to me. “He went to Maine a month or so ago. Ask him who was in the bed when he was texting you…taking care of him.” She gives me a once over again. “You don’t compare to what he deserves.”
I lunge, ready to let her face meet the floor when Holly jumps in between us pushing me back yelling she isn’t worth it. Allison blows me a kiss then stalks out the door with the pissy blonde on her heels.
Reality sinks in. There are customers here and I lost my cool in front of them. I let her get to me. I glance around to everyone’s eyes on me and humiliation soaks to my soul.
“I’m sorry,” I tell everyone rushing to the back.
I’m taking steady breaths trying to slow my adrenaline and focusing on the white wall when Holly comes around the corner.
“Geez, what a bitch. Don’t let her get to you like that,” she tries to calm me.
“I hate his damn past. I fucking hate it.” My voice wobbles and hot tears begin to pool.
“Good thing she’s his past because if that was his future, esh, I feel for him.”
I know she’s trying to lighten my mood, but right now it’s only annoying me so I don’t respond wiping the tears that have fallen. I absolutely hate being so mad that it makes me cry. It only infuriates me worse knowing she got under my skin like she did.
Thankfully, Holly leaves me alone and allows me to get it together. I pull my shoulders back willing myself to calm the hell down. In a vain attempt to gather my thoughts I do the first thing that comes to mind—silverware. I slam the napkin down, then jab the fork, spoon and knife in the middle and roll.
Stupid bitch.
Napkin, silverware, roll.
I don’t compare to what he deserves, hateful bitch. And what the hell is wrong with the way I look. Just because I’m not five eight with a banging tight body, and legs that go on for miles, doesn’t mean he deserves better. At least, I’m not screwing every man out there.
Napkin, silverware, roll.
“I went ahead and closed out your table,” Holly says handing me the miserable tip they left.
“Thank you,” I say tossing the utensils in the bin.
“She’s jealous, Paige. Levi wants you and not her. Don’t let her do this to you.”
I glance up. “I hate having that shit thrown in my face. I’m good, though,” I sigh lying through my teeth. “Really, I’m fine now.”
“Good!” she chirps. “Quitting time is just around the corner.”
“I’m working Tonic tonight.”
“Ooh, even better. Hot college boys, drunk and throwing money at you. Geez, what I wouldn’t do to be you sometimes.”
I stifle a laugh.
“You should wear the sluttiest thing you own. Do you even own slut material? Probably not,” she shakes her head. “I’ve got things you can borrow.” She hits her forehead with the palm of her hand. “Shit would fall right off you. If that don’t scream slut, then I don’t know what will.”
“And why do I want to look like a slut?”
“Makes me feel better when I have men eating out of my hand,” she shrugs.
“Holly, you’re a waitress. Everyone eats out of your hand,” I quip.
“Ruin my own little fantasy, why don’t ya. You’re so evil. Evil I tell you!” she says cracking up sauntering back out to the floor.
Chapter 27
Holly was right—Tonic is just what I needed. This place is slam packed, which gives me no room to think about what happened today with Allison. I’ve been here for four hours and patrons keep coming. There haven’t been any breaks, no stops, no quick pauses, no time to catch my breath. Don’t get me wrong— I’m not complaining about it. The tips are pouring in, but I’d like to know what in the world is going on.
I tried getting ahold of Levi after I left the restaurant to let him know what happened, but I guess he was still at the gym. Even though he has a few months until his next fight, he continues to train, keeping up his stamina and focusing on staying in shape.
“The best for the best, right, Paige?” Mason sarcastically yells at me over the crowd.
“You won’t complain when you’re lying on top of your money snuggled to your fiancé,” I joke.
He considers the thought for a moment and smiles wolfishly. “Can we be naked when we do it?”
“It’s your fiancé, your body and your money. Do what you want, but keep me out of your thoughts!” I jest.
“Hopefully, I’m the only one in your thoughts,” his sexy voice fills my ears before I look up to see him.
Levi is leaned against the bar with his dimples broadcasting his adoration, his soft eyes eating me away. I feel giddy, like I need to exert energy and jump up and down, maybe even over the bar to wrap my arms around him. Instead, I force myself to remain calm but offer up a wide, toothy grin.
“Hey!” Before he can say anything, I grab a cup and add water to it, setting it up on the bar for him. “Oh wait!” I hold a finger up grabbing a pink umbrella shoving it into the drink. “There. A Levi Special.”
His lips quirk to the side and an ache of lust shoots through my legs causing the ground underneath me to wobble. Oh, if he only knew what he
did to me.
“Having a good night?” he asks.
“It’s been crazy. What’s going on tonight?” I beg myself to stay together, filling another order.
“Guess everyone had the same idea at once,” he says over his cup just before taking a sip.
“I guess,” I shrug. “Oh, I had a lovely visit today.”
“I don’t remember seeing you earlier,” he says curiously with a big grin.
“Your girl, Allison, stopped by the restaurant. Is she always that rude?”
His jaw muscles tick and he bounces his head from shoulder to shoulder. “What the fuck?” he mumbles. “Why is she here?” he grits between the tense muscles of his jaw.
“Apparently to bless me with her presence,” I retort.
“Come see me when you get a break. We’ll talk more.” He acknowledges the people around him. It’s my cue to shut up until later. He winks then saunters away, but by his purposeful steps, I know he’s pissed and on a mission to get to “his” table.
It’s been about an hour since I’ve spoken to Levi. The crowd at the bar has been insane as people are still piling through the door. He’s been hanging out with Adam and Blain, laughing and cutting up. Usually when I try to sneak a peek, he’s looking back at me. I swear there’s something in his eyes, something I think we’re both scared to recognize. Behind his gaze is restrained tenderness, the very silhouette of warm devotion as if he’s pouring his feelings into me. Although there’s the possibility it could be a figment of my imagination, I’ll hallucinate it until I see and feel something different. I could be setting myself up for heartbreak or launching myself onto cloud nine.
I’m sliding a beer to a man when I spot an unwanted person with a very unwelcoming and spiteful stare perching on the bar.
“And a bartender? What a nice touch considering he doesn’t like to drink,” Allison spews.
