by Helen Juliet
“Oh fucking hell yes,” Kai wailed.
He was rock hard again now, and so was Riley apparently. He removed his fingers, hastily wiping them on his own leg so he could tear the condom wrapper open and roll it down over his straining length. He grabbed the bottle of lubricant again to drench Kai’s crack and stroke it up and down his erection. “Are you ready for me?”
Kai nodded. “Please,” he rasped.
Riley reached forward and took a hold of his shoulder, pulling him up to his knees so they could kiss sloppily. “You’re amazing,” he panted.
Without needing to be told, Kai dropped back to all fours. His fingers bunched up the silky material of the sleeping bag under his hands. Riley lined his cock up to his hole, pulling his cheeks apart with one hand. He used the other to rub his tip tantalisingly over Kai’s entrance.
“Ri-ley,” Kai begged, stretching out his name with desperation. “Fuck me. Now.”
Without any further hesitation, Riley pushed in, breaching him with his tip. Kai sucked in cool night air, forcing himself to relax and let him in, working through the burning. Riley rubbed his hands over his flanks and his ticklish sides. “You feel incredible,” he said, his voice strained. “Oh my God Kai.”
“More,” Kai instructed. He was unable to say much more, pushing back to penetrate himself further. Riley obliged, surging inwards until he bottomed out, his balls bouncing against Kai’s heavy and overly sensitive sack.
Kai grit his teeth, willing himself to accustom to the sensation as quickly as possible. The burn was lessening with every deep breath he took. Riley was helping as he kissed and rubbed his back, shushing him and telling him how perfect he felt.
Despite playing around with Valerie a few years ago, it had been a while since Kai had put anything up his arse. And there was undoubtedly something different with a pulsing cock to a rubber one. But after a moment to catch his breath it began to feel good, and he rocked back encouragingly against Riley’s hips.
“I want you,” he uttered.
“Fuck,” said Riley. “Say that again.”
“I want you to fuck me, now, Riley,” Kai whimpered. “Please. Please.”
His first few thrusts were slow, exploratory. He slid in and out of Kai, trying slightly different angles, until…
Kai howled. “There, there,” he begged. He’d never understood why more of his friends weren’t into pegging. Since Valerie had shown him what massaging his prostate could feel like, he had been desperate to try again.
But hearing Riley’s ragged breath behind him as he began to pound relentlessly, knowing he was feeling everything just as intensely as Kai was, was even better.
“Like that, don’t stop,” he stammered over their gasps and grunts and the slap slap slap of sweaty skin.
“Kai, oh, Kai,” Riley growled.
He reached around and began to jerk Kai’s cock with rapid strokes. It was all he needed to push him over the edge. His orgasm tore through him like a bolt of lightning. He bellowed as his vision whited out, arms and legs quivering as Riley slammed into him again and again.
With one final thrust, he forced his crotch against Kai’s backside. His back arched as he dug his fingers into the flesh of Kai’s belly, coming with a shout.
For several moments they both stayed where they were as the aftershocks rattled through them. Then Riley carefully pulled out, and Kai flopped on his side. He watched as Riley removed the condom, tied the end then dropped it on the grass out of their way. Not wanting to sleep in the wet patch, Kai grabbed a few tissues from his rucksack and hastily scrubbed the mess away before Riley dropped down next to him, exhausted.
He bit his lip and Kai could tell he was about to ask if he was okay, post-coital doubt already sneaking in. He wasn’t having any of that. Instead, he hauled Riley over to him so they could tangle together and kiss. “Holy fuck,” he whispered sleepily. “That was brilliant, you’re brilliant.”
Riley looked at him shyly through his eyelashes. “You liked it?”
Kai shook his head, rubbing their noses against one another in an Eskimo kiss. “No, I loved it.”
He had just about enough energy to shuffle them both comfortably onto the bedroll. Then he reached over to flip the other half of the sleeping bag over them, covering their legs and backsides. He cradled Riley against him, snuggling his face against his broad chest.
“Night, night, baby,” he mumbled, succumbing to sleep with ease.
27
Riley
One side of Riley was cold. The other was hot and pinned down with something heavy. There was a dull ache in the backs of his heels and his mouth tasted funny. His whole body was stiff and angled awkwardly.
He blinked gritty eyes against pale yellow sunshine and a greyish-blue sky. He was camping, but why was he outside? He swallowed, his throat dry. There was someone beside him, and…dear lord they were naked.
It all came rushing back in one great tidal wave of memories. Kai had kissed him, and then Riley had fucked him shamelessly. He couldn’t even claim he was drunk, he’d been as sober as a judge. That might have been comforting if Kai had taken charge after initiating the kiss. But Riley had clambered on top of him then taken him from behind.
He tried to slow his breathing. Kai had seemed into it, right? Riley hadn’t been too pushy? The fact that Kai had come on to him at all was enough to wrap his head around. Let alone the thought that Riley might have got too caught up in the moment and acted like a bossy slut.
It had been years since he’d topped. The kind of guys he hooked up with didn’t even bother to ask most of the time, they just assumed he’d bottom. And it was fine, he enjoyed it certainly. But when he thought about the way Kai had bent over for him last night, this big strapping caveman of a guy, giving himself up eagerly to someone like Riley, his heart contracted with carnal yearning.
If he wasn’t facing a humiliating disaster in the cold light of day, he tentatively wanted to say that last night had been incredible.
Kai was sound asleep, his arm around Riley’s waist with Riley spooned up to his side. He was so warm he was like a furnace, but they only had the corner of the sleeping bag draped over their legs and a bit of their torsos. Any part of Riley’s body that was exposed to the elements was therefore chilled. Now he was awake, there was no way he could ignore how uncomfortable he was.
He’d left his phone in his bag to protect it, but he couldn’t reach it without disturbing Kai, and he was too scared to face him yet. So he had no idea what time it was. He tried to wriggle and get comfy, but he needed a piss, and his joints were aching from sleeping on the ground.
He closed his eyes and made himself take a few deep breaths. If he could drift back off to sleep for a while, maybe he’d forget about his bladder and could put off what the hell he was going to say to Kai.
Would he regret it? Riley chewed his lip and tried to imagine his reaction upon waking to the reality that he’d let himself get fucked by another dude. Riley couldn’t really picture anything other than an awkward agreement to act like nothing had ever happened.
The thought made his heart break, but if they could maintain a façade of normalcy for the rest of the week, maybe no one else had to find out. Riley didn’t want to get a reputation.
Tears threatened at the corners of his eyes. As hard as it had been to pine after Kai all these years, it was going to be harder to forget the way he’d felt wrapped so tightly around his cock. The way he’d looked as he’d panted and gasped and struggled to stay upright on trembling limbs. Hardest of all to banish the memory of him pulling Riley close to snuggle together as they fell asleep.
But what was he thinking? Kai was straight. If he wanted to have a quick homo dalliance out in the woods where no one ever need to find out, that was perfectly reasonable. Lots of guys fooled around. Sex was sex, right? They were never going to walk hand in hand back to the campsite all lovey-dovey. Kai was never going to want to date him. They had nothing in common, and Riley was seriously lacki
ng in a vagina.
His thoughts were like lead in his chest and his bladder was popping. He couldn’t bear to stay cuddled up any longer; might as well tear the bandage off now and get it over with.
Kai didn’t wake though as Riley extracted himself and for that he was grateful. He snatched up yesterday’s clothes, a wet wipe and his phone, and scarpered towards a cluster of trees for a modicum of privacy.
There was dried cum and lube around his crotch, but the wipe managed to clean most of it up. Chances were he smelt pretty funky, but at least he’d be comfortable. He sighed as he pissed. Kai had smelt incredible. No cologne or hair wax, just pure man and sex and…
He needed to stop this. It had been great – beyond brilliant – but it wasn’t going to happen again and he needed to start protecting his heart now so he wouldn’t embarrass himself. He couldn’t get clingy, otherwise things would not only get awkward between them but for Kai and Brendon too.
He’d wanted to get himself a collection of moments to take home and cherish, and this was way more than he could have ever hoped for. He just needed to put it in his fucking pocket and be a man about it.
His clothes were a bit damp as he put them back on, but he immediately felt better not wandering around starkers. His feet were looking better too; not healed of course, but vastly less inflamed and much drier. With Kai’s gel plasters, he should be fine to put his boots back on in a bit and make the journey home.
Finally, he checked his phone. The battery was shockingly low, but Riley was able to quickly read the text his dad had sent in response to his messages the day before. His family was glad to hear they were both okay and they urged him to take it slow getting back today. There was no hint of blame in the words, but Riley still felt guilty. How did he always manage to fuck things up?
The lump under the sleeping bag stirred, and Riley decided he couldn’t put off the inevitable any longer. He needed to go back and face the music. Put on a brave face.
“Morning,” Kai mumbled as he approached. He rubbed his eyes and pulled his sleeping bag around his lap as he sat up. “What time is it?”
Riley checked his phone. “Quarter to six.” He stood for a second, not knowing what to do with himself, then crouched to start getting his bag in order. It was mostly Kai’s things that were still out from the night before, but it gave him something to do.
“Are you alright?” Kai asked.
“Yeah, sure,” Riley said. He glanced over his shoulder and offered a tight smile. It was fine, they really didn’t have to talk about it.
There was a pause where Riley focused on repacking his food in an orderly manner and took a gulp of water.
“Last night was cool,” Kai said cheerfully. Riley squeezed his eyes shut, not turning around. “It’s not every day you pop your gay cherry,” he added with a laugh.
Shame burned through Riley, his cheeks heating up as he gritted his teeth together. “Glad I could be of service.”
“Hey,” Kai said hesitantly. “Are you sure you’re okay? I didn’t do something wrong, did I?”
“Why would you?” Riley asked, standing and turning to face him. He managed his best smile and ruffled his hair away from his head. “I know it’s early, but my feet seem better, so I thought we could get going soon.”
Kai gave him a scrutinising look. “You’re not okay,” he said, shifting under the sleeping bag. Riley wished his broad, toned, inked, gorgeous chest wasn’t on display. It was making it painfully hard to forget why he was naked. “Can we just sit and talk for a bit?”
Riley scoffed and tried not to let out the mildly hysterical laugh he was holding back. He didn’t really succeed. “It’s fine, we don’t need to. It was fun right? No harm done.”
“Oh,” said Kai. He dropped his head. “You just…that’s it?” Was that relief, or…something else? Kai cleared his throat. “I mean sure, it was fun. The gay part was a bit of a shock, but you have to experiment with these things, haven’t you?”
He looked up again with a smile, but Riley had caught onto that word. Experiment. Of course that was all it was, he knew it, he’d told himself that earlier. But to hear it out loud again just hit a bit too close to home.
He laughed ruefully. “Yeah, that’s what I’m here for, handy queer testing for Scouts. I hear they give badges out now for that.”
Kai sat back on his hands, eyebrows raised. “What the fuck? Why are you being like this?”
Riley waved his hands, unable to meet his eye. “It’s fine, I get it. A lot of people are curious. Just, let’s move on, alright?”
“What if I don’t want to move on?” Kai asked.
Riley’s temper was flaring. “This isn’t an experiment for me, it’s who I am. And yeah, we had a good time, but that’s it and I’d rather just walk away with what dignity I still have, yeah?”
“Dignity?” Kai spluttered. “You’re being kind of a dick if I’m honest. Can you just tell me what I did? I don’t understand.” He patted the bedroll beside him, and his tone softened. “Riley, come on. Can we just talk about this? Come and sit with me.”
Riley flinched at the idea though. That bag smelled of them and their time together. He moved around. “Honestly, it’s fine, you don’t owe me anything,” he bit out. “I just-”
The words died in his mouth. He’d planned on waking Bia so he could use her as a distraction to get out of the conversation.
But she wasn’t there.
“Bee?” he cried, racing over the grass to her nook in the rocks. But it was empty. He stepped back, his head snapping in all directions. “BEE!”
Kai stood, the sleeping bag around his waist. “What’s wrong?”
He cupped his hands around his mouth. “BEE!” There was no sign of her though. “Oh fuck she’s gone, she’s wondered off!”
Panic seized him, and he spun to grab his shoes and socks. His feet stung as he jammed them back on, but he didn’t stop.
“Hey, hey,” Kai said. He held the sleeping bag up with one hand and reached for Riley with the other. “Calm down, she can’t have gone far. We’ll find her.”
Riley jerked out of his reach. “She’s my dog,” he snapped, mortified to hear his voice break. He wouldn’t cry in front of Kai, he wouldn’t. “I’ll find her. I’ve caused you enough trouble. I’ll just see you back at the campsite, alright?”
“What?” Kai said. He was looking around, presumably for his clothes.
But Riley was already hurrying off up to higher ground, away from the main path. If he knew Bia, she’d trot off exploring, sniffing out new interesting scents.
“BIA!”
“Riley,” Kai called after him. “Would you just wait! For fuck’s sake!”
He didn’t stop. His heart was pounding as he screamed for his dog, utterly ashamed that he had been so busy fucking his brother’s best friend that he hadn’t noticed her wandering off.
What if she’d gone hours ago? What if some stranger walked off with her or she got stuck down a rabbit hole and he never saw her again?
“BEE!”
Tears were running down his face and he scrubbed them away angrily. He’d find her, he had to. It didn’t matter that his feet were protesting again after only a few minutes walking. It didn’t matter what Kai thought of him; if he was pissed with him or thought he was a joke.
All he cared about right then was finding his Bia-Boo and getting them both back to the campsite safely.
And quite frankly, if he just threw everything back into Betty’s boot and floored it back to London, it wouldn’t be the worst idea he’d ever had. This holiday had turned into even more of a disaster than he’d feared, and he was quite ready for it to be done with.
28
Kai
Kai tried calling out again but Riley was still stubbornly rushing off, yelling Bia’s name between his hands.
“Fuck,” said Kai out loud, not sure what the hell had just happened.
Seeing as no one was around to hide his modesty from anymore, he droppe
d the sleeping bag and scrambled around naked to fish his clothes up from where he and Riley had thrown them.
A pain lanced through his chest. He must have done something wrong. Everything had seemed fine last night, Riley had treated him to some of the best sex of his life. He’d woken up practically buzzing, utterly delighted with himself that he’d been brave enough to make a move.
But Riley had been so hurt – or angry – or hurt and angry. Now Kai had no idea what had caused it or how he was supposed to fix it when Riley had run off and left Kai to grab all of their gear.
He could just leave it and run after Riley and Bia too, but he had no idea how far the little dog might have wandered. No, it was best if he packed everything as fast as possible and ran in the direction Riley had headed in the hopes of catching him before he got lost too.
Seriously though, Kai thought as he hopped on one foot, trying to pull his boot back on. What had he done wrong? He’d given Riley plenty of opportunities to back out when they’d been having sex. He had asked him what he’d wanted and did it his way. He’d been in control the whole time, and Kai had thought it had been amazing. What had changed?
His heart hurt to think maybe Riley hadn’t liked it. Was there something Kai had said to make him feel cheap or slutty? Because that wasn’t how he felt at all. He thought Riley had been magnificent, he’d loved it. Abruptly, he drew himself up halfway through rolling the sleeping bag up tightly enough to fit into its travel bag. He realised he’d been hoping they’d do it again.
He really liked Riley and he’d thoroughly enjoyed the sex. He was bewildered what he might have said that could have suggested otherwise. Riley hadn’t seemed impressed that he’d described last night as an experiment. In hindsight, he could sort of see why. That might come across sounding like Kai didn’t care, that he’d been using him to ‘try out the gay’.
