It was his fault. All his fault. She should’ve been with him, not angry and upset. He was an ass. Why the hell hadn’t he listened to his gut and told her the day he moved in that he was there as a friend to keep an eye on things? He should’ve put her first, not the captain, not himself and his need to be near. She mattered. Her feelings. Her wants. He should’ve told her and let her make up her own mind if she still wanted to be more than friends.
Damn, he fucked up. He just hoped Layla didn’t pay for it.
In what seemed like two hours he finally screeched to a halt behind their apartment, grateful he hadn’t been pulled over for speeding but wondered why the hell he didn’t see a patrol car now. He raced to the building, unlocked the door and took the stairs at a dead run, not stopping until he neared Layla’s door and heard the unmistaken sound of her…laughter?
She was laughing? Why was she laughing with the creep who left her notes?
Did the bastard drug her?
He grasped the handle—surprised to find it unlocked—and burst into the apartment. Layla screamed and jumped to her feet along with…Jade?
“Noah! What the hell?” Hand over her heart, Layla’s chest heaved as she stared at him from across the room.
“Are you okay?” He rushed closer, gaze taking in the otherwise empty room, an unarmed Jade then to Layla, raking her from head to toe, looking for signs of duress, restraints—drugs. But her gaze was clear, not foggy, and full of anger which explained her flushed face.
“You scared us to death.” Her hands jammed her hips while she glared at him. “Ever hear of knocking?”
“Not when it comes to a threat situation.”
“Well, you can relax, Rambo, it doesn’t apply here. Jade and I were just talking about the notes. Having a heart to heart. I was explaining how it was important not to sneak around. To confront the person you care about. To be honest and truthful, because otherwise your relationship starts off unbalanced and will eventually crumble.”
Her words cut him to the quick, slicing his heart and he had no defense because…dammit…she was absolutely right. Adrenaline completely doused along with his fear for Layla, he released a breath and turned to Jade. “You’re the one who has been leaving the notes?”
That would explain how he hadn’t caught her. She must’ve slipped back into Coffee Cats through the office door when he’d assumed the perp had gone straight outside to the parking lot.
The young woman glanced down at her entwined fingers and nodded. “Yes. Sorry. I didn’t mean to alarm anyone.”
He thought back to the messages.
We need to talk.
It’s getting out of hand.
Time is running out.
While not exactly threatening, they could still be perceived that way. “And the security cameras in the building?”
“I was afraid someone would see. I just…I needed to talk to Layla about…” Jade drew in a deep breath and met his gaze. “About Kelly. And I didn’t want her to hear or see on the monitors so I had my small wireless camera that operates on 5 GHz bandwidth in my hoodie pocket I switched on to disrupt the signal.”
Surprise rushed through Noah, lifting his brow, but not because of her attraction to her female coworker, but because of her knowledge of electronics. The last vestiges of his anxiety over there being a threat to Layla dissipated with the young woman’s confession.
Jade’s shoulders were hunched, not tense, fingers were twisted together in anxiety instead of clenched tight in a fist. Her mouth was slackened, not taut.
No signs of aggression whatsoever.
He transferred his attention back to a silent Layla. “I apologize for busting in. But don’t forget I was on the phone with you when you walked in here. After you said, “It’s you. You’ve been leaving me the notes.” The damn line went dead.”
So had his heart. It stopped beating and only just now started up.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to alarm you. I just didn’t want to be interrupted by calls every ten seconds.”
Son-of-a-bitch. His heart dropped to his knees. “You shut your phone off?”
“Yes.”
Jesus. “Layla...I thought…” He swallowed a few more curses and shoved a hand through his hair, working to regain control. “Do you have any idea what that did to me?”
Images of her and bloody scenarios from the war flashed through his mind.
“I thought your police buddy would’ve called you twenty minutes ago after he left when he discovered everything was sorted out.”
“No, he didn’t.”
“Sorry.” She dropped his gaze and when it returned, sadness replaced all the fire.
The impact rippled through him like a prizefighter’s punch to the gut, reminiscent of an hour earlier when he’d confessed his love for her and she pretty much told him it was too late.
“I assumed he would’ve called you,” she continued. “I am sorry, Noah. But, all of this could’ve been avoided.”
“I should go.” Jade grabbed her purse from the floor and turned to Layla. “Thanks for the talk. I’m really sorry I scared you. I was worried about myself and didn’t think of what it might have looked like to others.”
“It’s all right. That seems to be going around. Are you sure you’re good?”
He deserved that jibe but flinched anyway.
“Yes, I am and I’m going to follow your advice.” The woman turned to him with her brow furrowed. “Again, I’m really sorry, Noah.”
The door closed behind Jade before he could respond, leaving him alone with an unhappy Layla. He wanted to hold her to reassure himself she was okay, but her stiff posture and the closed look on her face told him any advance wouldn’t be welcome, so he shoved his hands deep in the pockets of the damn pirate get-up he wore for her.
“Your costume needs to be returned tomorrow,” she said. “You can either take it back yourself or drop it off here in the morning and I’ll take it back to the rental store with mine.”
“I can return them both,” he offered, hoping it would give him a chance to see her tomorrow because he was definitely getting the cut-out vibe from her.
She shrugged. “Whatever you want.”
Yep, cutting him out. “I want you,” he said with all the sincerity he was feeling.
Tears filled her eyes. “I just can’t go there right now.” She shook her head and swallowed. “I’m hurt, Noah. And feel betrayed. Used. Sick.”
Shit.
Removing his hands from his pockets, he stepped toward her, his gut taking another invisible blow when she backed away. “Dammit, Layla, I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve the lies or deceit. Just know I did it to keep you safe, because we both know you would’ve sent me packing if I told you the day I arrived. Am I right?”
Her jaw worked a moment before she nodded. “Yes.”
“Then I have to stand by what I did,” he said. “The only thing I’m guilty of was agreeing to watch over you for your godfather. Everything else that happened here between us was all very real and damn amazing.” Her jaw worked some more and tears silently spilled down her face, but she remained quiet so he continued. “God, Layla, I had to keep you safe, and no way in hell was I going to entrust your well-being to another person.”
She absently petted Rescue, who jumped to the back of the chair where she stood. “I hear what you’re saying, and will probably even understand it in a few days, but right now I’m barely getting air into my chest. I need time.”
Thank God she wasn’t severing all ties. It wasn’t a complete brush off, just a brush for now.
He hoped.
“Okay.” He shoved his hands in his pockets again, aching to hold her trembling form.
“Look, I’m tired. It’s been a long day. I’m going to bed. Alone,” she said with a pointed look. “You can see yourself out. Good night.” With that she turned and disappeared down the hall and a second later the sound of her door closing ricocheted through his heart.
Feeling lower tha
n low and rightfully so, Noah reached out to scratch Rescue behind the ears before he turned and headed for the door.
He blew it.
The best thing to ever come his way couldn’t stand to be in the same room with him and he only had himself to blame. He trampled Layla’s trust and crushed her heart in the process.
Even if, by some miracle she forgave him, he never would.
***
At lunch the next day, Layla sat across from her sister in the café, eating a panini she couldn’t taste, pretending everything was fine when it was not. She cried herself to sleep last night while her emotions ran the gamut from angry, to sad, to feeling guilty at sending Noah home. Then she dreamt about him leaving and deceiving all night.
“So, I think tiaras and tutus would be good for the wedding. What do you think?”
Layla blinked, refocusing on her sister, and realized a little late she missed everything Christie had talked about the past twenty minutes. “Sorry, what did you say?”
Her sister sighed. “Why don’t you just call him? I’m pretty sure he’s waiting by the phone.”
A smile tugged her lips at the visual Christie’s words invoked. “Noah does what he wants, when he wants. I can’t see him waiting by the phone for anyone.”
“He would for you,” her sister insisted. “The man may have screwed up about not telling you Earl asked him to watch over you, but he adores you and would do anything you asked.”
Layla knew this, deep down she knew and was working on getting past the hurt and bitterness of feeling used. “I just want him to be honest with me.”
“I’m pretty sure that won’t be an issue anymore.” Christie shrugged, swirling the straw in her iced tea. “His claim to love you is real.”
She frowned. “How did you know he said that?” They’d been in the stable, not near the crowd at the party.
“Earl told me,” her sister replied, before the whine of a siren echoed down the street as engine 58 raced past.
“And even if he hadn’t said it, I’m pretty sure his actions spoke loud and clear. I mean, he gave up his home, his job, guard unit, and friends from the Poconos for you, Layla. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.”
Her heart warmed and ached at the same time. “I know.” She didn’t doubt Noah’s feelings, she just wished he would’ve respected her enough to tell her why he came back home. How different everything would’ve been if he’d told her how he felt that first day, instead of hiding behind duty. She understood why he did it. She just didn’t like it. Nor did she want to come second behind duty.
Kelly rushed into the café, her gaze clouded with anxiety and Layla hoped it wasn’t because of Jade.
“What’s wrong?” She rose to her feet. “Is something wrong with Jade?”
The woman’s brows lifted and a soft look entered her eyes, momentarily replacing the anxiety. “No. Jade’s good…great, actually. We’re going out tonight. But that’s not why I’m here.” Kelly grasped her arm. “I’m sorry. Rescue got out. One minute he was in the office, the next he was out when I opened the door for the humane society dropping off today’s cats. Jade went after him, but she can’t find him.”
Another siren and truck raced by and she knew. “Stay here and watch the café.”
She raced out the door with her sister on her heels. The smell of smoke drifted on the breeze, signaling the fire was close, and her concern immediately split in two for Rescue and Noah. Her mind and heart always went to the man when there was a fire, even if he wasn’t involved.
And now this close fire fed her worst fear. Rescue snuck out to see it.
As they rounded the corner they didn’t have far to go. Flames raged from the top floor of the three story apartment building across from the corner. The police already had the street blocked and a barricade up to keep the spectators at a safe distance. But it was too far away for her to see her cat.
She moved closer, wanting to call or text her godfather, or Noah, or any number of the men but she hesitated, not wanting to take them away from their job.
“Do you see him?” She turned to her sister and frowned after scouring the scene in front of her.
“No.” Christie shook her head.
Layla called to him and one of the firefighters immediately came over while others scrambled to hook up hoses at the corner fire hydrant.
“Do you need help, ma’am? Is someone in the building?” He straightened. “Oh, hey, Layla. Christie.”
“Hi, Tory,” her sister replied. “We need your help.”
“Yeah.” She nodded. “I was calling to my cat. Have you seen Rescue? He snuck outside when he heard your siren.”
Dawning entered the man’s green gaze. “Oh. I know him. He comes over to see Cap at the stations sometimes. But, I haven’t seen him today. I’ll radio to the guys to keep an eye out for him.”
“Thank you so much.” Relief slumped her shoulders as she watched Tory rush back to the scene. It never ceased to amaze her how the men didn’t appear fazed by the heat or smoke or danger.
Christie grasped her hand and entwined their fingers. “I hate knowing Robert and Noah and all the guys are in there.”
Layla squeezed her sister’s fingers. “I’m sure they’ll be fine.”
They had to be. Her mind refused to think otherwise but readily admitted she was scared to death, not only for Rescue, whom she couldn’t spot anywhere, but for Noah. She always did worry about him when he was on rotation, but actually watching the men work made it much worse. Between that and her anxiety over her cat, she could barely breathe.
A moment later, her jaw slackened as one of the firefighters walked away from the burning building.
Noah.
She’d recognize those shoulders anywhere. He broke through the crowd, cradling Rescue in his upside-down helmet as he marched to her. Smoke and soot clung to him, flattening his hair, smudging his face. And damn, he never looked so good. “I believe he belongs to you.”
She scooped up the fur ball and thanked God he was okay. He was so tiny and the fire was a monster. Heat from the blaze seared them even at a distance. “Rescue, you scared me half to death.” She cradled him to her chest, needing to physically reassure herself that he was safe, while meeting Noah’s gaze. “Thank you so much.”
Longing flashed through his eyes before his neutral gaze returned. “Any time. I’ve got to get back.” He hesitated a second as if he had more to say, then shoved the helmet back on his head, pivoted around and marched toward another firefighter and she watched as they fussed with each other’s tanks, then disappeared into the burning building.
Rescue squirmed and meowed, but she held on tight. “Oh, no you don’t.” She turned to Christie. “I’m taking him to my apartment. I’ll be right back.”
No way would she be able to concentrate on work, knowing that Noah was in a burning building down the street. She left her nodding sister and rushed to take her cat to her apartment, then shut and locked her door to make sure he didn’t have a way to escape in case he miraculously learned to twist a knob.
On her jog back to the fire, she wished for two different miracles. That all the firefighters were safe and that the blaze would be under control by the time she reached her sister.
They weren’t. And it wasn’t. Not yet.
Chapter Ten
For two hours long, excruciating hours she stood with Christie, holding hands, holding each other up as they watched the men fight like hell to contain the blaze. Her mind seized, stuck fully on Noah.
The man rushed in to danger to help people, both as a soldier and a firefighter. His courage and bravery were only outshined by his compassion. She was so proud of him. Her chest tightened and vision blurred. She should’ve told him more often. And wished he was with her in her apartment right now, safe and sound like Rescue, professing his feelings, because now she was suddenly ready to listen.
She was an idiot.
God…what did she do?
Faced with the re
ality that he could be gone in an instant, her damn mind cleared. Woke up. Put things into perspective. He did what he did because he loved her. He gave up everything for her, sacrificed even before he arrived.
She was lucky.
And utterly stupid.
In what seemed like two lifetimes, the fire was finally out and the men began to pack up their equipment. But not Robert.
She watched as her future brother-in-law marched straight to Christie, yanked her in close and kissed her long and deep. Her sister didn’t seem to care her fiancé was covered in soot and smoke. Layla’s gut tightened along with her chest as envy washed over her.
Then Noah drew near and God, she wanted to run to him, but after the way they’d left things last night—her doing—she felt weird just picking up like nothing had happened.
“Rescue okay?” he asked, stopping a foot away.
She nodded. “Yes. Thank you so much, Noah. Thank you for finding him.”
He smiled, scratching the bridge of his nose. “He kind of found me when I exited the building now.”
She returned the smile, warmed by the thought that both Rescue and Noah were the most important males in her life and one was safe back in the apartment, and the other was standing, living, breathing, smiling in front of her safe and sound. “I think he missed you.”
His gaze narrowed and he appeared to stop breathing as he tipped his head. “Just him?”
“No.” Unable to stay away, she launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and holding tight. So very tight. “Not by a long shot.”
“Thank God,” he uttered, crushing her closer and burying his face in her neck without even hearing her apology. “I was so afraid I’d lost you.”
She held him and shook while her throat swelled. “Never. God, I’m sorry, Noah. So sorry I let you leave last night without talking things out.”
He gripped her waist and drew back to stare into her face. “No. Don’t be. You had every right to be angry. I’m angry at me. I’m just grateful you’ll give me another chance. I promise I won’t let you down.”
Dallas Fire & Rescue: Whine and Rescue (Kindle Worlds Novella) (Citizen Soldier Series Book 5) Page 10
