Jagger knew every word Tyler spoke was right, but he also knew he had to wait until the perfect time. He couldn’t go at her as irritated as he was right now, it would be too easy to lose his temper and end up making accusations that would only make things worse. He was going to have to let this go for a while.
‡
Chapter Seven
“Thanks for inviting me over for cookie day!”
“Thanks for coming,” Meredith opened her front door, ushering Bianca inside.
Once she stepped in, Bianca could hear the noise from the kitchen. Between the adults and the children, it sounded like they were having a great time. “Sounds like a party.”
Meredith shook her head, a rueful grin on her face. “We have some margaritas, because we’re all gonna need it when this is all over. We’re just drinking slowly.”
Bianca laughed. Unlike the rest of them, she worked with kids all day; granted her students were older, but every once in a while, they could still get on her nerves.
“Hey!” She yelled to the group of women and children that had gathered. There were a ton of hellos shouted back, including a few “Aunt B’s!” that made her heart clench. She loved these kids with everything she had. “Who wants me to help them?” Again lots of screams as she gratefully accepted a margarita and sat down at the kitchen table.
“So where’s Jagger today?” Jessica asked as she had a seat next to her friend. They hadn’t seen each other since their Nashville trip the week before.
“He’s at home, wrapping some gifts. Don’t worry; I hid the guitar so he won’t find it.”
“You got it in?” Jessica’s excited gasp caused B to be excited about it again.
“I did, and it looks so good. I’m really proud of myself. I hope he loves it. If he doesn’t, it’s gonna break my damn heart,” B laughed.
“Wait, you got Jagger a guitar?” Meredith handed her a margarita with an excited squeal.
“I did,” she pulled her cell phone out of her pocket and went to the picture she’d taken, showing it around the room “I’ll be paying it off for the next few months, but I think he’s going to love it.”
“Girl,” Christine whistled. “My brother is gonna drag you down next to the Christmas tree, strip you bare, and give you the ride of your life, and I’m not talking about on the back of his bike either.”
There were snickers from the adults in the room and Bianca felt a blush all the way to her neck. “Thanks for that.”
“No problem, I’m always here to make inappropriate comments in front of children. Y’all just remember to invite me every time.”
Bianca turned back to Addie. “Okay little girl, what kind of a sugar cookie are we makin’ today?”
Chubby fingers grabbed a Christmas tree and the two of them got to work. Glancing out the window, Bianca saw snowflakes – the first of the season. Perfect weather to decorate cookies.
*
Jagger sat on the living room floor, wrapping gifts. The two of them had split the gifts in half and he’d been stuck with this bunch. Basically he put them in bags and made sure the tissue paper looked decent. All of B’s were pretty with bows and perfect corners. He laughed at himself as he stuck a ribbon on this one, hoping that whoever got it, appreciated his flair. Finishing up, he situated all the gifts under the Christmas tree.
They’d had a lot of fun decorating the house for Christmas. They hadn’t had much room in their small apartment for more than a small tree and a small Christmas Village. Here, with all the additional room in their house, they had a much bigger village, an adult tree, and a life-sized snowman that sat to the right of the tree. He hoped that over the years they lived here their decorations would increase. He’d had visions about doing some outside stuff—lights in the yard, coming off the house, and maybe some lawn ornaments, but time had gotten away from him. Next year, he knew he’d be prepared because this was all he’d ever wanted in his life, a place to call his own with the woman who loved him by his side.
He was nervous as he waited for her to get back from Tyler and Meredith’s and his mind was wandering. They needed to have a talk and he was dreading it. Her present would shock her, because he was all but positive she didn’t know that he knew about New Orleans. Thinking about her keeping it from him still tore him up.
They’d been through a lot in their relationship and he’d thought they were past the point of keeping secrets from one another. That didn’t mean he didn’t understand where it came from. He knew her hopes, her dreams, desires, and he also knew her fears. But one thing he knew more than any – he knew her better than she knew herself. She wanted him to go with her, but she was scared to ask.
He blew out a gust of air and hoped like hell this night went well. Christmas Eve was supposed to be a happy time – traditionally it was one of the happiest nights of the year for the two of them. They had a tradition of exchanging gifts on Christmas Eve and he hoped this year his gift wouldn’t be thrown back in his face. It’d never happened before, but there was always a first time for everything.
Glancing out their living room window, he noticed the snow was starting to pile up. A frigid Arctic front had come in the day before, and the local weather was calling for a few inches of snow. As soon as B got home, he’d be able to enjoy the peace and serenity of it. For now, he worried. She’d texted him when she left the Blackfoots’, and figuring that she’d have to take her time on possibly slick roads, she should be pulling into the driveway within the next fifteen minutes.
Jagger got up from where he’d been sitting on the floor, stretching his back. There was a chill in the air, and he thought turning on their gas fireplace might win him some bonus points with her. They hadn’t used it yet, but he definitely wanted to set a mood for tonight. It took a few minutes for him to figure out the controls, but by the time he had a roaring fire, he’d seen the lights of B’s Mustang making its way down their driveway.
Immediately, he felt relieved. It surprised him since he hadn’t realized how tense he’d been until now. Knowing there were secrets between them tore him up. It’d especially torn him up, knowing what he’d known for the past week. He wondered if she’d noticed he was quieter than usual, but then again, she’d been a little more quiet herself. He wondered if it had to do with her trip to Nashville, because that’s when it had started. In the end, he hadn’t asked. He knew that if he confronted her, the anger he’d felt over her keeping New Orleans from him would boil over in a rage and while he was hurt, he didn’t want to fight with her about it. In the past few days, his anger had abated and he’d been able to see where she was coming from. In the end, he’d been glad he hadn’t gone with his first instinct and realized for the first time that maybe he was finally becoming an adult.
Walking towards their deck door, he heard her open it and step into their mudroom, beating the snow off her boots.
“Is it slick out there?” He asked, grabbing a blanket as he made his way to the back of the house. He was happy to have her home; he didn’t do well with being by himself in the house. It reminded him too much of his childhood, alone in a house that was way too quiet.
He watched as she took her jacket off, hanging it with the others, and shook her hair out. Drips of water and rapidly melting snow fell onto the floor, and he quickly grabbed a towel, cleaning it up.
She nodded. “Oh my God, really slick. Plows haven’t been through town yet, much less out here. I slid a few times, but nothing I couldn’t handle. Is that mine?” she reached out for the blanket he held draped over his forearm.
“Oh yeah, I figured you’d be cold. I have the fireplace going. Thought it would be a nice place for us to exchange gifts tonight,” he grinned down at her.
“Sounds good to me,” she agreed, putting the blanket around her shoulders like a shawl. “Let me go get your gift.”
“I already got yours, so just meet me down here when you’re ready.”
She leaned up on the balls of her feet and kissed him quickly. “Be back
in five.”
*
Bianca was nervous as she went to the small closet in the spare bedroom. Jagger never went in here, and she’d known when she hid the guitar there, it would be safe. Now she had a case of nerves. What if this wasn’t something he really wanted? What if he was so attached to the other guitar he didn’t want someone buying him a new one? She’d never asked him what he wanted, hadn’t ever given it much thought. Now she wondered if maybe she was pushing something she enjoyed off onto him.
Firming her shaking hands, she refused to let her insecurities and doubts win. Jagger never asked for anything. Ever. He wanted her love, her time, and her attention. Since the beginning, that was all he’d ever asked for. Out of everyone she knew, he was also the one who could give two shits about piling up lots of material things, which was why they took such good care of what they did have. Both of them had come from nothing, and together they now had a life that they were building together.
“Bianca, quit being a dumbass and take this present downstairs.”
She tried to calm her beating heart and knew it was her own fear that prevented her from living in the moment. She’d never gotten anyone a gift that meant as much as the one hidden in that closet did. Back when she was a kid living at home with a single mother, she hadn’t been able to get many gifts. More years than not in school, she’d been ‘sick’ on gift exchange days, because there simply hadn’t been extra money for one. She could count on one hand how many times she’d received gifts as a kid.
When she’d gotten older, she’d made it a point to give gifts to the people in her life, even if they were simple things. This was the most extravagant one she’d ever given, and she knew that what she was really afraid of was that he wouldn’t love it the way she loved it for him, he wouldn’t see the thought she’d put behind it.
Her heart waged war with her head though, because she knew her Jagger. If there was anyone who knew her hopes, fears, and her insecurities, it was the man downstairs. He would never make her feel like she was less important, never make her feel unworthy or like her gift didn’t matter. It was time for her to believe in herself, trust in their love, and realize she could handle any situation thrown at her.
‡
Chapter Eight
“Who goes first?” B asked as she put her gift just outside the living room so he couldn’t see it. She knew if he saw the shape, he’d know exactly what it was and she’d worked really hard to keep it a secret. The day it had been delivered, he’d almost seen it because he’d come home from work early. She’d be damned if the surprise was going to get spoiled, today of all days.
“You,” he patted the seat next to him, motioning her over to sit beside him.
She was kind of disappointed because she really wanted to give him the guitar, but she also didn’t want to give away how big the gift was just yet. Seeing the excitement in his eyes, she wondered what in the hell he’d gotten her. He hadn’t looked this smug since the night he’d proposed.
Walking into the room, she had a seat next to him, watching as he pulled a beautiful looking bag from the gifts. He’d really upped his wrapping game since they’d gotten married, and she knew if he continued, she’d hand all the wrapping over to him in the future.
He pulled the bag back, laughing at the look on her face. “Don’t get all excited and thinking my wrapping skills have improved. I paid to have this done,” he joked as he handed it to her.
She tilted her head back, giggling. It was as if he could read her mind, but in the end it didn’t matter. No matter if he’d done an awful job, she would still love it because it’d come from his heart.
Peeking into the bag, she saw an envelope, which she decided to open last. Instead, she went first for her favorite perfume and body lotion. It was crazily expensive and she never spent the money on herself, but Jagger knew he was safe getting this gift for her. Giving him a small kiss on the cheek, she tore into the envelope, expecting a gift card. Instead, she glanced up at him with question in her eyes when she saw a plane ticket.
“Open it, and you get to ask one question, beautiful. One. I think you’ll understand once you open it,” his voice was soft, like he had a secret that he wasn’t willing to share with her.
She opened it with shaking fingers, gasping when she saw it was for New Orleans and it was around the date she’d been asked to present. There was no way he could have known about this, she’d made sure. Covering her mouth with her hand, she questioned how in the world he’d found out about it. “Jagger, how did you know?”
He cleared his throat and grabbed her hands in between his. He waited until she lifted her eyes to his, waited until he had her full attention. He was only going to say this once and he wanted her to understand it. “I found out by accident, about a week ago. I’m not gonna lie and tell you it didn’t hurt me or piss me off that you didn’t tell me about this amazing opportunity you have. B, you’re so talented at what you do. How could you even think about not doing this? Why didn’t you tell me? I’m always so proud of every fucking thing you do.”
She shook her head, trying to find the right words. Confronted with the truth, she wasn’t exactly sure why she’d kept it from him. It seemed so stupid now. “It’s really expensive for you to go and while my trip is paid for, I didn’t want to go without you. I didn’t know if we could swing it and I didn’t know if you could get the time off work,” she said it all in a rush.
He put up his hand, shushing all her protests. He grabbed her wrists then moved his hands so that they could entwine their fingers together. “I know all of that, because I found the letter, babe. We’re going. The plane ticket is for me. I’m not going to let you give up on something that means so much to you because you’re worried about what might happen. I’ll leave my cut at home and go watch you shine.”
Bianca hadn’t realized what a burden it had been on her heart until he’d made the decision for her. Unexpected tears were streaming down her face and the lights of the Christmas tree blurred. “I really wanted to do it. It’s hard to get picked, Jagger and they picked me. Out of hundreds, maybe even thousands, they picked me. A girl who used to waitress in a strip joint. Can you believe that?”
The way she said those words broke his heart. Sometimes his Bianca was still that same insecure girl who waited tables wearing skimpy clothing, just hoping to get the best tips. He hated that she’d always see herself like that, and he also hated that he hadn’t realized what this was all about.
“Because you’re truly one of the best at what you do. I’m not sure how to make you realize that. You’re a great teacher, and I wanna stand by your side when you do this like a proud husband should.”
She’d never felt more blessed in her life. “It could be a vacation for us. We never had a honeymoon. Maybe we can stay an extra couple of days, if it’s possible.”
“It will be; we’ll figure it all out. We always do,” he pulled her close and kissed her forehead, wiping away the tears as best he could. To know this meant so much to her made him feel like a warrior. He’d made this happen for her.
“Close your eyes. I wanna give you your gift now,” she whispered.
He winked, a mischievous smile on his face. “Are you gonna get naked? Is that my Christmas gift?”
She giggled, burying her face in his throat. “No, but I’m not ruling that out for later.”
“Can’t fuckin’ wait,” he closed his eyes, leaning back against the plush carpet. He made a show of putting his hands behind his head, interlocking them and sinking deeper into the carpet.
Bianca was nervous, more nervous than she’d been in a long time as she picked up the guitar, and sat it in front of him. The only thing shielding it from his view was the new case, which she’d also had the Heaven Hill logo airbrushed on. “Okay, open your eyes.”
He did just that, a bright smile on his face that slowly dropped as he saw what was in front of him. Slowly he leaned up into a sitting position. He still didn’t speak though, just lifted
his palm up and put it over his mouth. He sat in what appeared to be shock while she waited for him to have some sort of reaction.
“Jagger?” She was worried now, because he didn’t make a move to open the case and he hadn’t even glanced her way. His eyes were trained on it, almost as if he wasn’t seeing it. He seemed to be deep in his head, and it scared her.
“You got me a guitar?” His voice was hoarse as he asked the question. Like he didn’t believe she’d actually done it. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah,” she grinned, seeing for the first time how emotional this made him. If she wasn’t mistaken, there could have been some tears in his eyes. “Open it and tell me if I did a good job. I picked it out myself, and I hoped that you would love it.”
“Babe, I know before even opening this that you knocked it out of the park. Nobody’s ever bought me a gift like this before,” he fought for words. “I always wanted one, asked for it for Christmas every year. I told you about my parents though, they were so religious they wouldn’t even let us listen to anything other than hymns, and they wouldn’t trust me with a guitar. Every year I asked for one and never got one, it just broke my heart. The first year I was by myself, I bought the one I’ve been using.” He glanced at her. “Wow.”
She sank down in front of him, pushing his hair back off his face. “Nobody’s loved you like I do before. Open it.”
Hands shaking, Jagger opened the case, running his fingertips over the airbrushed artwork before he lifted the top. He inhaled deeply as he caught sight of what was inside.
“B, how in the fuck?” He pulled the guitar out reverently, and then flipped it over in his hands, examining every part of it.
A Heaven Hill Christmas Page 8
