by Ira Tabankin
The President, pounded the table, “I don’t think you understand. I’m going to save the planet. History will write that I single-handedly saved the planet from the scourge of Global Warming! I’m personally saving the planet. I will ensure we leave the planet in a much better position than we found it. I will reduce the amount of Co2 by 40%. The pain suffered by our people is nothing compared to the damage the planet will suffer if we don’t do this.”
The President’s Chief of Staff, “Mr. President, the people are very unhappy, they want their electrical energy costs rolled back to the way it was six years ago. The economic crisis and the rolling brown and blackouts are having a major impact on the country’s economic recovery. Companies are laying off people instead of hiring because their available electrical power has been reduced. Interstate shipping has come to a halt, the price of a gallon is $25.00. We’ve placed additional taxes on gasoline and diesel which currently sells for $32.00 a gallon. The cost is so high, most companies have taken their trucks off of the road. Trade has all but come to a halt. Stores have not been able to restock their sold inventory, stores lack the funds to pay the higher prices when any replacement inventory is available. Consumers are pressured by much higher food and electrical power costs. These higher costs have a negative impact on their disposable incomes. In simple terms sir, 30% of the country’s GNP is made up of consumer spending which has dried up. The transportation sector has all but stopped. You’ve cut the military spending 52%. Weapons and platforms used in the battles with the Chinese haven’t been replaced. Sir, our GNP last quarter fell 10%! We are in the deepest depression in the country’s history. We still owe China in excess of $8 trillion, our other creditors have also demanded full repayment. Sir, we’re in the middle of a crisis we can’t bullshit our way out of. Sir, we are bankrupt. Every time we increase taxes, our revenue falls, we’re seven months behind making entitlement payments. We’ve cut pensions and social security payments. Every sector of our people are hurting. I suggest we rethink our entire fiscal program.”
The President shakes his head. “If the people had supported my common sense budgets and long-range economic plans we wouldn’t be in our current situation. I’m not going to return to a plan where the rich get richer and the poor get beaten up and made poorer. I’m committed to income and fiscal equality. Does anyone here think we should change our plan when we are so close to success?”
The Chief of Staff and the Secretary of the Treasury raise their hands. The President shakes his head, “I accept your resignations. Please leave the Situation room.”
The Secretary of Defense says, “Mr. President, while on the subject of fiscal policy; I need an additional $500 billion to replace the equipment lost or used in the naval battles with the Chinese.”
“Did we damage the Chinese fleet worse than we suffered?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Good, then we don’t need to spend more. We’ve got one less enemy. Consolidate your forces, we’ll be stronger and also able to spend less. If we have fewer enemies, we won’t require as large a force.”
“Mr. President what about if Russia sees our weakness and increases their absorption of Europe?”
“I don’t care about Europe. What have they done for us in the previous one hundred years? We’ve had to fight how many wars to bail them out of their own problems? How many trillions did we spend in Europe versus spending it on our own poor? No more, let the crazy Russians have them. Let Putin pour his trillions into a European black hole.”
“Sir, what if Russia moves into Alaska? We have picked up intelligence that the Russians are amassing an invasion force near Alaska.”
“Why would they invade Alaska?”
“Mr. President, for our oil and gas.”
“Don’t they know I’ve capped those wells so the risk of an environmental disaster is reduced to zero? We’ve had too many environmental issues, I’m sure the Russians aren’t fools, I don’t envision them causing potential environmental damage. I’ve found Putin to be a friend to the planet.”
The other members of the cabinet look at the President in surprise. The Secretary of Defense says, “Mr. President, our intel says they will invade within two months.”
“No, I don’t believe that. We’ve reset our relationship with the Russians. Don’t you remember I sent Hillary there with a reset button? We’re friends now.”
“Mr. President, we’ve had rumors that the Russians have forces operating inside the country. We’ve learned they’ve supplied weapons to the Tea Party in the Mid West.”
“No. I don’t believe it. You have nothing but right wing rumors and bullshit. I don’t believe for one second that Putin would use his forces to stir up unrest here. He knows we could do the same to him. State, arrange a call between Putin and myself. I’m sure we’ll be able to reach an agreement with Putin that he won’t interfere in our internal affairs.”
“Yes, sir.”
“People, we’re looking like fools, this lack of currency dropped ball is silly and preventable. I want every department to issue a press release that supports this administration’s plans and policies. Budget, see if we can release even a small percent of the entitlement payments, issuing something is better than not making any payments.”
“Yes, sir. I’m sure we can come up with something. It might only be a couple of pennies on the dollar.”
“I don’t care, as long as I can make a speech saying we’re going to start making payments again. Once the people know I’m on their side again and taking care of them, they will support my other plans.”
“Yes, sir.”
Defense asks, “Mr. President we’re still facing the issue of having to remove all of our infrastructure from Hawaii. The vote clearly went in favor of them joining China.”
“I’ve told the Governor I won’t accept the vote, there had to be massive voter fraud. In fact, I want the FBI to inspect the voting records ASAP.”
“Sir, the Chinese want an inventory and timeline when we plan to remove our people and equipment. They’ve already begun moving people and equipment into the islands.”
“I just said I won’t accept the vote, I’m not turning Hawaii over to China.”
Defense continues, “Mr. President, the people of Hawaii and the Governor have agreed to switch allegiance to the Chinese. If we try to stop the Chinese, we’ll end up fighting our own people. Stopping the Chinese from taking Hawaii could lead to a nuclear Third World War.”
“No, it won’t. We’ve shown the Chinese they can’t stand up to us.”
“Mr. President, my advice to you is, allow the Chinese to have Hawaii, we can’t stop them.” The Secretary of Defense shakes his head, “Sir, we can slow them down, but not stop them.”
“Do what you can to slow them down.”
“Yes, sir.”
@@@@@
The Chinese ruling council met to discuss their plans, the defense minister smiles standing, “Mr. Premier, we have 25,000 troops on the ground, with an additional 120,000 in transit via freighters. We will have total control of the Hawaiian airspace and within a week enough soldiers on the ground to make it impossible to evict us without a major battle.”
“Can the American’s stop us?”
“No, sir. They can mobilize and move troops to Hawaii, however not before the bulk of our forces arrive. If they try to land or jump onto the islands, we’ll have a number of surprises waiting for them. We’ve moved the balance of our submarines to Hawaii, plus we’re installing surface to air and surface to surface missiles. These will keep the American ships and planes away from the islands. If they try anything, we’ll shoot their planes down and sink their ships. Even their battleship is damaged and out of the fight. We’ve learned they have problems locating our diesel-electric submarines.”
“You have permission to proceed. How are we doing winning the hearts and minds of the people who opposed us in their election?”
The Minister of the Interior smiles, “Mr. Premier, we’ve
set up communal kitchens and medical treatment centers where we’re providing food and aid to everyone. We’ve installed English-speaking police officers who have started cleaning up the gang and crime issues, making the islands safe for people to walk their streets. We’ll have farming experts on the ground the end of this week to help their farms increase their yields and we’ve reopened their colleges. Our troops report people coming up and thanking them. The initial relationship between our forces and the people are very good. Most of them have welcomed us with open arms. The ones who oppose us are silently being rounded up and quietly being disposed of.”
“I want videos made that show how happy the Americans are under us. Show how nicely we are treating them. I want them posted on the web ASAP. I want to shove it into the President’s face. The videos will help us with our goal of taking over California.”
“Sir, we can have them up within twelve hours.”
“Excellent. We’ll teach the President he should have paid us. After we turn Hawaii into a model territory, we will force California to join us. After they see how we’ve improved the life of the Hawaiians, the Californians will demand to join us. State by state we’ll take over America through their own people voting to join us. We’ll take them over without having to use nuclear weapons.”
The Chinese supreme council smiles at the Premier’s master plan which is working more smoothly than any thought possible.
Chapter 4
Captain Black is sitting on a metal folding chair in front of a folding bridge table in the partially finished medieval castle thinking, who the hell designs and builds a medieval castle in central Tennessee? I give extra points to the designer and builder, this will survive everything thrown at it, maybe even a small nuke. Someone is really concerned about their security, but where are they? We found the remains of a house that must have been destroyed in either fighting or the storm that roared through the area. It must be why whoever owns this house is building it to survive anything. If I had the money to build this thing, where would I hide? He’s interrupted by a corporal, “Sir, the Russians are here.”
“Thanks, please show them in.”
The six Russians are led into the room where Captain Black is sitting. The Russians enter looking around at the castle and taking in the details of the room. They sit facing the captain who smiles saying, “Isn’t this better than standing in the middle of a mine field?”
The Russian Corporal returns the smile, “Yes, sir. We thank you for assisting us out of the mine field.”
“Why don’t you tell me your story, start in the beginning, how you arrived in the US, who gave you your orders and where the weapons you sold came from. Anything else you’d like to contribute will be appreciated and you’ll be compensated for the extra information. Who would like to start?”
The Corporal asks, “Sir, may we have something to drink?”
“Of course, how rude of me, I think we have something you might like. Sarge, do you have the cooler ready?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Bring it in.”
Two men carry in a large cooler. The sergeant opens the cooler turning it to face the Russians, they smile when they see it’s filled with Russian Vodka. “Captain, how?”
“I have my ways. We had some intel that you were in my AO, I thought I’d be prepared in case I came across your Captain Sarnoff. Yes, I know his name and all of yours too. We have a file on your unit. We've been tracking you for a while. Hence, do us both a favor and don’t bullshit me. If you do, I’ll shoot you. I won’t shoot to kill you, I’ll shoot you in the foot, then the knee, can you guess where the next bullet goes? If you survive having your balls shot off, we’ll move to your elbows followed by the shoulder and finally the head. It’s your decision and I should mention, patience isn’t one of my virtues.”
“Captain, I see, I think that changes things a little, I will tell you what I know. Of course not being an officer, I did not have access to everything or to Captain Sarnoff’s plans. I followed the orders my officers gave me.”
“I’m familiar with the excuse you were just following orders.”
Unfolding a set of folded papers, Captain Black holds them up, “I have his orders, so just fill in the blanks.” Again the Russians are surprised. The corporal begins telling Captain Black their story which takes four hours with the Captain recording the entire conversation. He thinks, just about what we suspected. If it were up to me, I’d kill these SOBs. But a deals a deal. I’ll turn them over to intel and spend the rest of our time here looking for the owners of this castle. There’s also the sheriff to deal with. A sheriff who’s as dirty as my week old socks. The Russians are easy to deal with, what am I going to do with the sheriff? Might as well have him brought in. “Will someone please bring the sheriff in? Also, tell the MPs to remain with us.”
A moment later two MPs push the sheriff into the chair the Russian corporal just got out of.
The Sheriff smiles, “Warm chair, did you just kill someone in this chair?”
“No, but I could start killing people now if you’d like. Why don’t you sit down and shut up unless I ask you a direct question?”
“I don’t take orders from you. I’m the legally elected sheriff of Sumner County.”
“Sheriff that brings up an interesting question is, are we sitting in Sumner or Davison County?”
“Huh?”
“Sheriff, the border between Sumner, and Davison counties is very close to where we’re sitting. I’ll have to ask my S2 which county we’re in. Whichever county we’re in, there’s the question of what to do with you. Our records reflect that you’ve been fleecing the locals for supplies which you either keep or sell on the black market. It also seems that you own a couple of warehouses filled with supplies. I think you’ll be happy to know that I’ve had my people empty your warehouses and distribute the supplies to the locals who need them.”
“You can’t do that! That’s stealing. I own those supplies. I’m going to file a formal complaint with your commanding officer.”
“I think that’s an excellent idea. I’ll give you his contact information right after your trial for stealing from the citizens and abusing your office. I’m sure a local jury will grant you a lot of mercy.”
“Captain, have you heard of The Posse Comitatus Act? You have no authority here.”
“Sheriff, marital law gives us all the authority we need to deal with criminals like you. What or who were you looking for here with your handpicked boys?”
“I was looking for my good friend Jay Tolson.”
“Who I assume owns this mini castle?”
“It wasn’t always a castle, it used to be a beautiful 7000 square foot six or seven bedroom house. Jay owns the farm. We go back to when he first arrived in town.”
“Since he’s your good friend, maybe you’d be able to tell us where to find him. I’d like to have a word with him.”
“Did he do something to upset the mighty US Army?”
“It’s none of your business why I would like to speak with him. That I want to see him is all that you need to know. Are you going to help me locate him?”
“I really wish I could. I know he’s here, but this is my second visit in three weeks and I don’t know where he is.”
“Sheriff, how do you know he’s still here?”
“When I was here this house wasn’t a castle, it must have been destroyed in a recent storm, the castle is brand new. As you can see, it’s still under construction. I’d like to know where all of the building materials came from and what else he’s sitting on.”
“I thought you two were best friends.”
“I said friends, we’ve done some business together before.”
“I take that to mean, you’ve shaken him down for money or supplies. Sheriff, where do you think Mr. Tolson is hiding?”
“Captain, I don’t know. I’ve looked for him before. Have you asked your other guests? They seem to have arrived before you. Maybe they know where he’s h
iding.”
“Sheriff, I don’t know what to do with you. I can’t set you free, I don’t want you hanging around here. What have you got to say for yourself?”
“You have no legal standing to hold me. I don’t recognize your authority to even be here. As the county sheriff, I received no official notice of marital law, without one you have no authority here. I should be the one holding you.”
“Sheriff, the President, signed an executive order declaring martial law, it was carried on live television. Every news organization reported it.”
“Can you prove it was delivered to me or any of the elected officials here?”
“Sheriff, you’re playing word games with me. I don't tolerate bullshit. Sargent place the sheriff under arrest and make sure he’s not lonely.”
“Yes, sir.”
